User Panel
User Panel
User Panel
USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:44:41 AM EDT
[Last Edit: mike3000fl]
Right so imagine you are offered a deal that basically says you get to have sex with any women (plural) you want, as much as you want, unlimited women... celebrity, porn star, neighbor's 19yr old daughter, girl in the drive thru, whoever, and that includes two or three girls at once, at will, every hour of every day for the next year straight, just snap your fingers and bam they are begging for the dick, bang out whoever you want, as much as you want, whenever you want. Different girl an hour and I'll throw in unlimited erections for you older folk. And then on top of that you get unlimited cash for that entire year, buy f-14 jets, and night vision, an island, and other cool shit. Anything you want you can buy, except bear spray and lion repellant which leads me to the next part...
BUT the trade off is that at the end of the year you have to get mauled to death by a wild lion, and a hungry grizzly bear, both of which will eat you alive from each end, so maybe the lion eating your face while the bear starts with the legs, and you can't run away because your ballsack is tied to a tree with 10feet of 550 cord. again you can't circumvent the mauling by buying snipers on overwatch to take out the lion or having your balls be detachable etc. would you accept that deal? |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:46:17 AM EDT
[#1]
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:47:23 AM EDT
[Last Edit: mike3000fl]
[#2]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By czechsix: /media/mediaFiles/sharedAlbum/mourning-nod-1006.gif But you still get mauled |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:48:53 AM EDT
[#3]
I'll pass. But, can I watch?
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:49:22 AM EDT
[Last Edit: braapJob]
[#4]
These are threads I expect in GD.
Also. Yes. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:50:26 AM EDT
[#5]
Does she do heterosexual butt stuff?
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:53:14 AM EDT
[#6]
Nah. I'm good.
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:54:36 AM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Efl15: Does she do heterosexual butt stuff? |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:55:04 AM EDT
[#8]
30 years and I'd think about it.
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:55:32 AM EDT
[#9]
nope
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:56:32 AM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Yes she will play with your ass. While that other guy in the thread watches. Both your fantasies fulfilled. But you get mauled a year later. Would you do it? Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By Efl15: Does she do heterosexual butt stuff? Well played. (golf clap) |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:57:15 AM EDT
[#11]
INB4 That's my fetish.
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:57:43 AM EDT
[#12]
I'd have to think long and hard about this
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Posted: 5/2/2024 1:58:13 AM EDT
[#13]
BTDT (yawn).
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:00:31 AM EDT
[#14]
Can I get blackout drunk before my death?
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:00:39 AM EDT
[Last Edit: BillofRights]
[#15]
How bad does your life suck, that you’d even consider it?
You’d have to be suicidal. Not virtually, but actually. Just start living your life Today, with no self-doubt, no inhibitions, no fear. Find a woman. Make money. Everything you did which got you to this point; do the complete opposite. See where it takes you. You’ve got literally nothing to lose. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:00:53 AM EDT
[#16]
When I was 22 i may have given it some thought but in my 40s, married, two kids and a business...not appealing at all.
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:02:12 AM EDT
[#17]
Bears cant catch me in an f14
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:05:02 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: How bad does your life suck, that you'd even consider it? You'd have to be suicidal. Not virtually, but actually. Just start living your life Today, with no self-doubt, no inhibitions, no fear. Find a woman. Make money. Everything you did which got you to this point; do the complete opposite. See where it takes you. You've got literally nothing to lose. Some of the most successful men on this planet live this life, the women, the money, but the lifestyle kills them fast (granted not by lions but drugs or some other shit). So based on your response i will put you in the "I'll take the deal" category. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:12:50 AM EDT
[#19]
You recently divorced OP?
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CA, USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:13:55 AM EDT
[#20]
How many pot needles did you inject before posting this, OP?
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:17:23 AM EDT
[Last Edit: mike3000fl]
[#21]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Cardplayer: You recently divorced OP? no. Trying to find out how many people would live out their fantasy of banging out Taylor swift and Hillary Clinton, while flying f14 jets and re-enacting scenes from top gun with their bestie between hourly erections, at the expense of having to get mauled by a lion and bear a year later. Did you read the first post ? ETA while also wearing night vision or thermal or whatever you can afford with unlimited cash |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:19:40 AM EDT
[#22]
So it's kinda like Joe vs the Volcano except with more money and unlimited poon?
Unless I have terminal cancer that's a no from me dawg. |
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AL, USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:20:59 AM EDT
[#23]
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KY, USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:22:36 AM EDT
[#24]
'Tis a good year to die.
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:22:45 AM EDT
[#25]
Nah, I'm good. That would be a painful way to go.
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:23:50 AM EDT
[Last Edit: BillofRights]
[#26]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Some of the most successful men on this planet live this life, the women, the money, but the lifestyle kills them fast (granted not by lions but drugs or some other shit). So based on your response i will put you in the "I'll take the deal" category. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: How bad does your life suck, that you'd even consider it? You'd have to be suicidal. Not virtually, but actually. Just start living your life Today, with no self-doubt, no inhibitions, no fear. Find a woman. Make money. Everything you did which got you to this point; do the complete opposite. See where it takes you. You've got literally nothing to lose. Some of the most successful men on this planet live this life, the women, the money, but the lifestyle kills them fast (granted not by lions but drugs or some other shit). So based on your response i will put you in the "I'll take the deal" category. I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I’d be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I’m trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. You’re not really into this for the women or the flying. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I’ll make you squeal like a pig...” The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He’s pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “You know what to do.” Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he’s really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, “You’re not doing this for the hunting, are you?” |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:27:51 AM EDT
[#27]
Nah, I want to see my kids continue to grow up, marry, have grand children. I want to take them up to our cabin and fish, shoot the shit about the good ole days.
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:28:19 AM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By CyberSEAL: When I was 22 i may have given it some thought but in my 40s, married, two kids and a business...not appealing at all. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:31:38 AM EDT
[Last Edit: mike3000fl]
[#29]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I'd be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I'm trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll [insert appropriate colloquialism for sodomy here]." The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "You know what to do." Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?" One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. And the cash... providing for your family, forever. Your wife would want you to take this deal (for the financial part, not because she will have to sleep with you nightly). You're thinking of yourself and failing as the head of household if you don't accept |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:33:11 AM EDT
[#30]
Am I allowed to spread pimento cheese my ball sack just before the mauling?
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:34:39 AM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I'd be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I'm trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll [insert appropriate colloquialism for sodomy here]." The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "You know what to do." Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?" One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. Meh, I coulda bought This. https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-purchases-81-soviet-era-fighter-jets-from-kazakhstan-for-a-steal-19-300-each/ar-AA1nVRoc |
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:35:09 AM EDT
[#32]
nope
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:35:54 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By FlyLeaf: Am I allowed to spread pimento cheese my ball sack just before the mauling? |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:39:16 AM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. And the cash... providing for your family, forever. Your wife would want you to take this deal (for the financial part, not because she will have to sleep with you nightly). You're thinking of yourself and failing as the head of household if you don't accept Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I'd be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I'm trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll [insert appropriate colloquialism for sodomy here]." The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "You know what to do." Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?" One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. And the cash... providing for your family, forever. Your wife would want you to take this deal (for the financial part, not because she will have to sleep with you nightly). You're thinking of yourself and failing as the head of household if you don't accept Lolz. Good wives with morals don’t think that way. She coulda fed me to the lions years ago, but didn't. Some of them have loyalty and love. (Not many, but some) |
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:40:17 AM EDT
[Last Edit: mike3000fl]
[#35]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Meh, I coulda bought This. https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-purchases-81-soviet-era-fighter-jets-from-kazakhstan-for-a-steal-19-300-each/ar-AA1nVRoc Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Originally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I'd be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I'm trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll [insert appropriate colloquialism for sodomy here]." The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "You know what to do." Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?" One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. Meh, I coulda bought This. https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-purchases-81-soviet-era-fighter-jets-from-kazakhstan-for-a-steal-19-300-each/ar-AA1nVRoc |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:44:51 AM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: I'll allow this as long as said bear and lion aren't allergic to pimento Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By FlyLeaf: Am I allowed to spread pimento cheese my ball sack just before the mauling? Awesome. I'll add a walnut to my butthole for texture |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 2:45:26 AM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: A fleet lol, you're so small minded, lol. I'm talking about OWNING mig, the company itself, fuck it, be president of all of Russia if that Soviet shit floats your boat. Anything you want. But bear and lion at the end of the year Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: Originally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: I kinda already have this deal. But, sex with one woman by choice. I can buy anything I want. I could even buy a Mig and fly the piss out of it. I'd be broke in a few years, but not eaten by animals. I'm trying to remember if I was ever desperate enough where this deal would sound interesting. Nope. I was never that desperate or horny. I think You have a Mauling fetish OP. Reminds me of this: A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 30.06 rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I'll [insert appropriate colloquialism for sodomy here]." The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He's pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, "You know what to do." Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys a bazooka. Now he's really mad. He returns to the forest, sees the bear, aims, and fires. The force of the bazooka blast knocks him flat on his back. When the smoke clears, the bear is standing over him and says, "You're not doing this for the hunting, are you?" One MIG, lol. I'm offering a fleet of MIGs. Meh, I coulda bought This. https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/world/us-purchases-81-soviet-era-fighter-jets-from-kazakhstan-for-a-steal-19-300-each/ar-AA1nVRoc Sorry, does nothing for me. I wouldn’t trade places with Elon. This reminds me of the SkyKing thread. There were a bunch of incels envious of Skyking, because he got to do whatever he wanted, for a couple hours, before certain death. There are some demoralized mf’ers out there. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 3:07:11 AM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Sorry, does nothing for me. I wouldn't trade places with Elon. This reminds me of the SkyKing thread. There were a bunch of incels envious of Skyking, because he got to do whatever he wanted, for a couple hours, before certain death. There are some demoralized mf'ers out there. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 3:17:47 AM EDT
[Last Edit: deuce_22]
[#39]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By WTFShane: Can I get blackout drunk before my death? Ah, there’s a way out. I don’t intend to get murdered by any species of mammal. But, if I’m totallly incoherent, sure. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 3:18:16 AM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Lol and you remind me of someone trying to justify their marriage/life choices based on bank account balance. Kettle calling pot black. How bad is it? Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: Originally Posted By BillofRights: Sorry, does nothing for me. I wouldn't trade places with Elon. This reminds me of the SkyKing thread. There were a bunch of incels envious of Skyking, because he got to do whatever he wanted, for a couple hours, before certain death. There are some demoralized mf'ers out there. It’s called contentment. Just do whatever you want in life. If it pays off, good. You’ll be content. If it doesn’t pay off, you will have lost, Nothing. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 3:26:54 AM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By braapJob: These are threads I expect in GD. Also. Yes.  The year would be the stuff of legends. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 4:58:25 AM EDT
[#42]
I'm not retarded, so of course I wouldn't take it.
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:03:48 AM EDT
[#43]
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:22:17 AM EDT
[#44]
Nope
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:50:24 AM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By mike3000fl: no. Trying to find out how many people would live out their fantasy of banging out Taylor swift and Hillary Clinton, while flying f14 jets and re-enacting scenes from top gun with their bestie between hourly erections, at the expense of having to get mauled by a lion and bear a year later. Did you read the first post ? ETA while also wearing night vision or thermal or whatever you can afford with unlimited cash We have very different testosterone levels. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:53:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: PROFESSORCHAOS]
[#46]
One year? Shit no. 30 years? Yeah probably.
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USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:56:32 AM EDT
[#47]
This is like one step above Monday Night Rehabilitation, so yes. All the Brawndo I can drink, right?
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SC, USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 5:56:37 AM EDT
[#48]
So basically i’d get to just live my current life for a year and then get eaten? Nah.
You dreamers out there need to grab them bootstraps and get on my level. |
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NY, USA
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Posted: 5/2/2024 6:04:32 AM EDT
[#49]
Thanks but no thanks.
I'm good with what I've got. |
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Posted: 5/2/2024 6:10:23 AM EDT
[#50]
I had that deal but rather than getting my nuts chewed off by a bear I got old, married and had kids.
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