User Panel
User Panel
User Panel
USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:26:57 AM EDT
[Last Edit: HecklerKac]
[#1]
Women always do dumb shit regarding security, safety and well being.
Can't tell you how many times I yell at mine for not locking doors or leaving her gun in the mud room, etc Edit, the therapist thing is bad news...get out of that shit 
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:27:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Boom_Stick]
[#2]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BuckeyeRifleman: The thing that stuck me is the fact my wife will surely bring this up and “vent” about me to her therapist. Without a care in the world, and I’m not angry about it either, frankly I think that’s healthy. But I’m the bad guy for venting to my mom of all people. Not only will she vent to her theropist, she wouldve vented to her mom too (if she had a good relationship with her). All women do that shit. She's just mad she fucked up and was called on it. But in staying consistant with typical vagina logic, youre still the bad guy. Also, women dont give a flying fuck if youre the bad guy. Youre just suppose to take it. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:30:08 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Boingo]
[#3]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Lolz. I never thought about it before, but my wife probably does that sometimes.  I’ll have to (discretely) ask her not to. The key is to point out someone else's stupidity and mention that it's internet 101 to not let strangers on the internet aka "friends" know your house is empty. You like your shit? This is one way for you to keep that shit. |
|
|
|
NY, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:37:19 AM EDT
[#4]
Meh.
An asshole would gaslight her, tell her that she imagined the whole conversation and that she had better tell her therapist that she's begun having auditory hallucinations when she gets back home.  
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:40:14 AM EDT
[#5]
Damn, dont play her game just move on.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:43:02 AM EDT
[#6]
Just tell her what you said here. You were venting. You are sorry. Shouldn't have talked with Mom about it ect. Just do the same shit she did and flip it back on her. Be like it's my duty to keep us safe and I feel like I failed because I haven't educated you on things like not giving strangers our address or telling them when we aren't home. You didn't know that people fake profiles to find burglary targets and whatnot and that's my fault. It's a passive way to call her an idiot but blame yourself so she will feel like an ass if she keeps blaming you. She'll seeth inside knowing you just called her a dumbass again but found a way to play the victim if she keeps attacking but there's not a damn thing she can do about it This is typical woman shit. I'm glad I didn't marry one that does this stuff but ones that don't are rare. Women hate taking responsibility for their mistakes.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:43:54 AM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By The_Master_Shake: Probably be easier if you had been robbed at this point 
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:44:57 AM EDT
[#8]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BoyScoutArsonist: When she says "it's going to take a long time to forgive you for this"' that means she's never going to forgive you for this. Pepper your angus. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:56:45 AM EDT
[#9]
Yeah, you're the bad guy because you didn't establish with your wife when she wanted to start a side gig (or main gig? doesn't really matter) that you don't sell from your home.
Poor communication in your marriage, sounds like. |
|
|
|
OH, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 2:57:13 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Vikingsouthpaw]
[#10]
Hoe_math on YT did a bit on this. He shows women's preferences to switch the Victim and Perpetrator roles if you let them.
Your wife set into motion a situation that places the household in a hazard. Make sure she is the one to stay hone alone and face the possible thieves. |
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:00:29 AM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Papposilenus: I get being mad, but venting about your wife is shitty. so yeah, you both failed at security and you betrayed confidence Agreed. I would not appreciate my wife bitching to her mother about me. I’d be pissed at her and her mother. If you were truly concerned about someone stealing your shit, your wife could have driven you back home. Furthermore, I would have someone steal my shit vs. fight with my wife. That is why I pay USAA. Discuss with your wife about another one of the infinite ways thieves try to scam us……and move on……together. Don’t bitch to your mommy about haw stupid your wife is. Additionally, your consideration that a properly charged security camera is going to provide you with some protection……is naive. More naive than your wife’s disclosure of your address. Unless you can name the guy carrying the TV out of your house……..the police do not give two shits. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:00:48 AM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Papposilenus: I get being mad, but venting about your wife is shitty. so yeah, you both failed at security and you betrayed confidence Agreed. I would not appreciate my wife bitching to her mother about me. I’d be pissed at her and her mother. If you were truly concerned about someone stealing your shit, your wife could have driven you back home. Furthermore, I would have someone steal my shit vs. fight with my wife. That is why I pay USAA. Discuss with your wife about another one of the infinite ways thieves try to scam us……and move on……together. Don’t bitch to your mommy about haw stupid your wife is. Additionally, your consideration that a properly charged security camera is going to provide you with some protection……is naive. More naive than your wife’s disclosure of your address. Unless you can name the guy carrying the TV out of your house……..the police do not give two shits. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:09:00 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Wizzy]
[#13]
She knows she fucked up. You don't need to chastise her and talk shit about her to your mom. Scammers are really good these days and they can get anybody. There's no use in making your wife feel bad because of it. Instead focus on a solution as a team and learn from it together. For richer or poorer, she will still be there if you get robbed. But if you lose her, you lose everything.
Tomorrow, mention how good scammers are these days and tell her not to feel bad about it. Tell her you were just disappointed in your camera's battery life. You realized you were just pissed at some lithium ions, not at her. Then say you had this crazy dream where a scammer stole everything you owned, but in the dream the scammer couldn't steal her, and because of that in the dream you felt like the wealthiest man in the world. Then take her to brunch or some shit. Women fucking love brunch for some reason. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:15:01 AM EDT
[Last Edit: BillofRights]
[#14]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Wizzy: She knows she fucked up. You don't need to chastise her and talk shit about her to your mom. Scammers are really good these days and they can get anybody. There's no use in making your wife feel bad because of it. Instead focus on a solution as a team and learn from it together. For richer or poorer, she will still be there if you get robbed. But if you lose her, you lose everything. Tomorrow, mention how good scammers are these days and tell her not to feel bad about it. Tell her you were just disappointed in your camera's battery life. You realized you were just pissed at some lithium ions, not at her. Then say you had this crazy dream where a scammer stole everything you owned, but in the dream the scammer couldn't steal her, and because of that in the dream you felt like the wealthiest man in the world. Then take her to brunch or some shit. Women fucking love brunch for some reason. Ah, the Fake Dream Gambit.  And they Say romance is dead. You know, it ain’t a bad idea at all, if you can pull it off.. Btw- don’t let her find this thread. 
|
|
|
|
KY, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:18:19 AM EDT
[#15]
Shoulda had your buddy “rob” the place after that just to give your wife a dose of reality
|
|
|
FL, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:21:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Yeremyahu]
[#16]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BuckeyeRifleman: She had like a beer. My wife doesn’t drink much. The thing that stuck me is the fact my wife will surely bring this up and “vent” about me to her therapist. Without a care in the world, and I’m not angry about it either, frankly I think that’s healthy. But I’m the bad guy for venting to my mom of all people. Yup, still was stupid, but I’m human. I need an outlet. I guess that’s why I posted. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BuckeyeRifleman: She had like a beer. My wife doesn’t drink much. The thing that stuck me is the fact my wife will surely bring this up and “vent” about me to her therapist. Without a care in the world, and I’m not angry about it either, frankly I think that’s healthy. But I’m the bad guy for venting to my mom of all people. Yup, still was stupid, but I’m human. I need an outlet. I guess that’s why I posted.  On the issue of personal security, doing actions and having conversations that build a community is in their nature. It's not their fault that we haven't created a high trust society for them to raise our children in. A husband has to preemptively engage with his wife and give his advice on those types of interactions, and in a way positive enough that she won't build an aversion to talking to him about the subject. I apologized. Either get over it or don’t. That’s her choice  that's not how women work, and there are few men who can release the hold of soured feelings. She's going to be grumpy about it for a while, and will probably give you a few more opportunities to get into a fight or to prove yourself. Hopefully, you can navigate those tests in a positive way. You have to rebuild good sentiments with social proof, attraction, and care. Don't let this event get you down, don't take it too serious, and maintain a positive and light hearted frame of view to engage through. Maybe tomorrow pickup some kind of small dessert, sit down next to her and eat it together. Absolutely, do not go full beta.Originally Posted By Tango: Damn, dont play her game just move on. I am not making any assumptions about you, and this isn't a question, but if you were drinking while posting this vent thread then that might be something to think on. Also, don't blaspheme, especially when writing in frustration about your wife. |
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:26:03 AM EDT
[#17]
offer her a suggestion. the address she initially sends can be a park or something nearby your house. if they are real and show up, they will contact her and then your real address can be sent. I am still kinda uncomfortable with that, but it’s a fair compromise to keep the wife happy. You can also do the exchange in a busy parking lot, but it’s more work for you.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:27:59 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Ah, the Fake Dream Gambit. And they Say romance is dead. You know, it ain’t a bad idea at all, if you can pull it off.. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BillofRights: Originally Posted By Wizzy: She knows she fucked up. You don't need to chastise her and talk shit about her to your mom. Scammers are really good these days and they can get anybody. There's no use in making your wife feel bad because of it. Instead focus on a solution as a team and learn from it together. For richer or poorer, she will still be there if you get robbed. But if you lose her, you lose everything. Tomorrow, mention how good scammers are these days and tell her not to feel bad about it. Tell her you were just disappointed in your camera's battery life. You realized you were just pissed at some lithium ions, not at her. Then say you had this crazy dream where a scammer stole everything you owned, but in the dream the scammer couldn't steal her, and because of that in the dream you felt like the wealthiest man in the world. Then take her to brunch or some shit. Women fucking love brunch for some reason. Ah, the Fake Dream Gambit. And they Say romance is dead. You know, it ain’t a bad idea at all, if you can pull it off.. It's a genius idea. It's the universe itself telling him how much he appreciates her. Some magical shit from the spirit realm making her feel special. It's the perfect move. Then brunch for good measure. |
|
|
|
TX, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:37:04 AM EDT
[#19]
Did you check references before you entered into that contract?
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:41:31 AM EDT
[#20]
She is a woman. My wife rarely (never) admits she's wrong. Its doesnt mean she thinks shes never wrong, she just wont admit it. Nor does she apologize. Frustrating sometimes.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:41:45 AM EDT
[#21]
We all know why it was dumb on her part, but continuing to bitch about her after she goes to bed is pretty bad.
|
|
|
|
FM, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:43:52 AM EDT
[#22]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By HillaryClinton: Not the asshole. How would your wife feel if yall had came home to a completely empty house? Giving a stranger your address AND telling them your out of town was pretty thoughtless. She would have blamed her husband for not charging the security camera and would have told him it’s his fault! |
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:49:44 AM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By lmeadows00: She would have blamed her husband for not charging the security camera and would have told him it’s his fault! You're right for being upset at he lack of situational awareness. That being said, you were very wrong for talking shit about her to your mom AND allowing her to hear it. It's a betrayal of trust. "Praise in public. Chastise in private." |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 3:52:26 AM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By BuckeyeRifleman: She had like a beer. My wife doesn’t drink much. The thing that stuck me is the fact my wife will surely bring this up and “vent” about me to her therapist. Without a care in the world, and I’m not angry about it either, frankly I think that’s healthy. But I’m the bad guy for venting to my mom of all people. Yup, still was stupid, but I’m human. I need an outlet. I guess that’s why I posted. She sees and talks to a therapist about you? Seems like there may be more to this. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:01:17 AM EDT
[Last Edit: ROCK6]
[#25]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By MMcCall: He is for everything after his wife went to bed. You keep shit like that between yourselves. This is good advice. Yes, similar shit has happened between me and my wife; shit happens, but she does understand the importance of OPSEC. I've made mistakes as well. That said, any disagreements should never be shared with a third party (like your mother), and neither should embarrass or criticize the other in front of others. Respect goes both ways, and disrespect shouldn't be taken lightly...from either side. Fortunately, nothing happened to your home. Unfortunately, you're going to have to work at repairing the damage to get to a place where you can both learn from the mistakes you made and discuss how to avoid it next time. ROCK6 |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:05:44 AM EDT
[#26]
You were spot on OP. I would have lost my shit over that.
She is 100% wrong but she is acting just like all women, won’t admit when they are wrong and plays mind games to make you feel bad. |
|
|
|
FL, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:24:06 AM EDT
[Last Edit: GMCSwath]
[#27]
Originally Posted By BuckeyeRifleman: Instead of just apologizing for her mistake, my wife doesn't take any responsibility for it and storms off to bed. ...my wife's lack of situational awareness and common sense at times, in reality I'm probably more pissed at myself for not charging the camera more than anything. My wife has been seeing a therapist... A great many of today's women share these traits. The worst thing you can do for you, her and your marriage is to let her see a therapist. She's supposed to be talking to you, not some stranger to validate wrong thinking and drain your bank account. |
|
|
TX, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:51:56 AM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By MMcCall: He is for everything after his wife went to bed. You keep shit like that between yourselves. When A man fucks up, the man fucks up and he has to own all of it. When a woman fucks up, Somehow, someway we want to make the man responsible for some part of the fuck up. He was frustrated about her fuck up. Maybe he shouldn't have said something to his parents but that has nothing to do with the original fuck up. His wife is a grown ass woman, she can wear the responsibility for her mistakes without trying to find a way to blame her husband. If my wife got mad at me for being frustrated and decided not to speak to me... Fuck it.... Oh well. Many years ago she tried not speaking to me for a few days, I laughed at that shit. I didn't speak to her for a month. |
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:55:11 AM EDT
[#29]
I'm always telling my wife about taking pictures in the house and posting them on Facebook.
It never fails he will be taking a picture of her cat and have the safe in the background. 
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 4:55:27 AM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By MMcCall: He is for everything after his wife went to bed. You keep shit like that between yourselves. This. Not worth it. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:09:37 AM EDT
[#31]
Yes, she was hugely wrong. Still. none of us are perfect. Knowing she has mental health issues, you overreacted. Not a good response. The damage is done. Better to do some groveling than pay out the wazoo for a lawyer and still lose everything.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:20:20 AM EDT
[#32]
Never apologize if you arent in the wrong. Women will always expect it from then on. They know they are wrong but the apology makes them feel like they werent.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:28:36 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 77Bronc]
[#33]
My wife tends to forget what she is doing and will post on her social media where we are, when we are out of town, by posting "look at we are doing in Disney" as an example.
I have to remind her, no telegraphing us being away until we turn at the subdivision sign on our trip home. I absolutely hate social media. OP not to pile on, but you are not the bad guy. How people buy and sell on FB Market Place is just insane, there is NO WAY I would do this. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:34:09 AM EDT
[#34]
OP, your post comes across as alcohol fueled. It reveals that you had been drinking when you tore into your wife.
Just an observation, not a judgement. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:35:56 AM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By FGracing: Women tend to not accept responsibility or apologize when they know they are wrong. It’s easier to twist around reality and deflect until they find a way to place the blame at your feet. Welcome to my life. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:44:32 AM EDT
[#36]
It would've been worse if that had been me. I know I would've said some things that weren't very nice. But all you can do is apologize, I guess. Or not, I don't know. Me? I'd own the fuck out of it.
"Hell yeah, I said that! Because what you did was dumb! What if we'd been robbed? How would you feel, then?" I guess that's a good reason why I'm not married (that, and the fact that I don't want to be married). But I tend to go nuclear when I know I'm absolutely right about something and the other person just doesn't see it. And I'll call you out for your stupidity because of it. And I'll do it in front of other people just to make you feel like shit. Yes, I'm an asshole. But when you're right, you're right. And I own that shit. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:45:49 AM EDT
[#37]
This is not eject material. This is blatant complacency and being naive. Women generally do not apologize or take ownership. Its just how it goes. This is a typical fight that I would have with my wife. "hey im driving an hour away to downtown Seattle to meet up with a stranger to pick up this item I bought with my small child."
I literally made her take the next exit and turn her ass around on the spot. This is normal. All you can do is teach. Dont expect an apology. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:48:54 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Phiers]
[#38]
double post
|
|
|
|
NH, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:52:42 AM EDT
[#39]
Women are like children. You're a Saint for tolerating that.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:53:07 AM EDT
[#40]
I wouldn't have started a fight with my wife in front of other people or continued to talk shit after she left, even if I was right.
She's going to remember it and bring it up forever, even if she was wrong. Penalties offset, first down. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 5:57:17 AM EDT
[Last Edit: P400]
[#41]
Alternate viewpoint.
You can't control the mistakes of your family members. They will continue to happen no matter what you say or do. You can control the precautionary measures you put into place to address said mistakes and misjudgements. Be better prepared. Stop messing around with battery powered cameras and hardwire that shit. Nothing happened, so that was a really cheap lesson. Don't ignore it. Also pick and choose your battles. You can scream "but I was right!" all day long. It don't matter one bit. As you are finding out.
|
|
|
|
GA, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:03:07 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Pioneer1]
[#42]
I've stepped on that doo-doo landmine a few times myself over the years.
Wives don't like to be called out on anything. Especially in front of the inlaws. You gave her all the ammunition she needed to put on a good mad- for right or wrong. In a perfect world she would understand that you were upset and just venting. In the world we live in, your transgression is fodder for running you down in therapy and an eventual divorce. All you can do is apologize, reflect on the drama this whole thing has wrought, and try to side-step that landmine next time. Battery powered ANYTHING in your first-line home defense system is not in my vocabulary. I'd sort that most ricky-tick. |
|
|
OK, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:11:55 AM EDT
[#43]
Fakebook, drinking, mental issues and “high end” AR15s are never a good combo.
OP you gotta learn to chill. |
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:12:08 AM EDT
[#44]
Stupid juice makes you do say stupid shit. OP got loud and acted over the top...like a drunk.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:20:24 AM EDT
[#45]
I would really like to hear @FluffyTheCat ‘s take on this.
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:32:45 AM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By King-Of-Town: My woman does this shit. I say my piece--- I don't give a fuck. Some people are right, some people are wrong. Your wife is wrong. Give no quarter. If your kid was talking to strangers, or playing with matches, and your corrected him, and het got made at you, how would you looking at it? Don't take advice from weak men her either. She pulls this shit because she doesn't respect you. You can work towards making it better or you can make it worse. The safety of your family and home is more important than her feelings. This is a byproduct of 2024 , feminism and the breakdown of male leadership of the home. |
|
|
|
NH, USA
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:42:10 AM EDT
[#47]
Sorry to hear OP, my ex wife never apologized and even when I was dead nuts right, she would turn up the heat and get madder. My gf hugged me when she got home from work yesterday for something she said in the morning that she really didn't mean. She had a valid point but could have said it better. I've done the same to her. We both took today off from work to spend together.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:49:12 AM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By AmericanPeople: You never tell people what she revealed. Hopefully you can make her understand but this event is why women suck at protective issues. They should not be in government or managers and probably not allowed to vote either. This. OP has unrealistic expectations for not only his wife but females in gereral. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:50:54 AM EDT
[#49]
Given that she’s fragile, reasons are right, approach is wrong. Sometimes easier to point out and let her get the oh shit moment. Wife wanted to have garage sales in the garage Va outside the garage while Inhad my tools and other valuables in the garage. I said no and that I didn’t want low lives casing the joint and then coming back later.
If you don’t have cameras and an alarm system, might want to get some. |
|
|
|
|
Posted: 4/19/2024 6:51:58 AM EDT
[#50]
If I were either one of these two, I’d divorce the other one.
|
|
|
|
Win a FREE Membership!
Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!
You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.
AR15.COM is the world's largest firearm community and is a gathering place for firearm enthusiasts of all types.
From hunters and military members, to competition shooters and general firearm enthusiasts, we welcome anyone who values and respects the way of the firearm.
Subscribe to our monthly Newsletter to receive firearm news, product discounts from your favorite Industry Partners, and more.
Copyright © 1996-2024 AR15.COM LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Any use of this content without express written consent is prohibited.
AR15.Com reserves the right to overwrite or replace any affiliate, commercial, or monetizable links, posted by users, with our own.
