User Panel
[#1]
IBTL
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“Budster, there’s a half-naked woman in your bedroom feeding pizza to some fish and she’s all yours.”
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[#2]
Read the original Ben Franklin quote about windows
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[#3]
so many non-legal ideas in my head right now
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PFG #397
Rob3220: "Walmart Ammo isn't good for anything. I don't think it even breaks skin. Rounds are made of compressed Jell-O, if I recall correctly." |
[#4]
Sign him up for subscriptions to gay porn magazines. Use the wrong house number on a couple of the mailing addresses.
Place Craigslist ads for free large dog crates. Place the ads for areas near military bases, particularly in other time zones, such as Hawaii. Use a burner number and forward all calls to his. |
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[#5]
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Originally Posted By NickGunar:
There is no shit show here. Everything is all in fun. |
[#6]
Get a Canadian to move in next to him.
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Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?" Then I said, "Here I am . Send me!"
Psalms 144. REMEMBER 9 / 11 Everyone wants to be a Patriot until it’s time to do Patriot shit! |
[#7]
OP doesn't sound like someone I'd want to live next to.
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[#8]
Line the property line with wind chimes and windmills out of balance just enough to make racket. A few windmills should squeak . Add several mirrors swinging in the breeze to reflect flashes of light.
Add three peacocks to decorate your yard. |
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Keep your powder dry, and watch your back trail.
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[#9]
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Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?" Then I said, "Here I am . Send me!"
Psalms 144. REMEMBER 9 / 11 Everyone wants to be a Patriot until it’s time to do Patriot shit! |
[Last Edit: kissfan]
[#10]
I'm sure you can find something here . https://shomer-tec.com/pages/all-products
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Florida Carry Region 3 Lead. floridacarry.org
Amateur General rating. NRA EVC. NRA Benefactor. Golden Eagles. SAF life member. GOA member. |
[#11]
Originally Posted By TnMike: We live in a subdivision in the county. One neighbor has pool parties for their kids (during the day on weekends) and he’s parked a running lawn mower next to their fence. Calls the sheriff every 4th of July on all the neighbors for littering on his property. Calls the Sheriff for unregistered vehicles terrorizing the neighborhood (golf carts). Standing on his property lines teasing his neighbors dogs. He call the sheriff when one of the neighbors were moving in because they had a vehicle “blocking” a fire hydrant. The list goes on. View Quote Why do Canadians litter on July 4th? |
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[#12]
A friend of mine had a POS neighbor who put up a huge PVC fence between the yard. He decided that it would make a great screen for a digital projector and had Friday night movie nights for about six months straight. He complained, but the fence was on his side of the property line and the town said he could do what he wanted on his his side. So, he had B-Movie movie marathons all night. I think the guy actually ended up moving. Or went to a nursing home. Something like that.
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Slow is smooth, smooth is fast.
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[#13]
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[#14]
Originally Posted By TnMike: We live in a subdivision in the county. One neighbor has pool parties for their kids (during the day on weekends) and he’s parked a running lawn mower next to their fence. Calls the sheriff every 4th of July on all the neighbors for littering on his property. Calls the Sheriff for unregistered vehicles terrorizing the neighborhood (golf carts). Standing on his property lines teasing his neighbors dogs. He call the sheriff when one of the neighbors were moving in because they had a vehicle “blocking” a fire hydrant. The list goes on. View Quote I wouldn’t be calling, but some of this shit would annoy me. What more do you want? Do you guys clean up the fireworks or leave them in his yard? Do the neighbors dogs piss and crap in his yard or bark a lot? Some people don’t like that. So basically this guy is a dick because he doesn’t like the noise or mess and you want to bug him more |
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[Last Edit: Pallas]
[#15]
My neighbor put out a floor fan on their patio, loudest fucking fan ever, it sounded like I lived in a hanger on a runway. They turn this thing on for no reason, 55deg, fan, etc. they knew it was loud because they turned it off at night, I made polite comments about how loud the thing is.
I started playing the muslim call to prayer on my outdoor speakers, loud… 5x a day. They commented on it, I told them I would keep playing it as long as they kept running the fan…and did they like gospel music? Anyway, they turned the fan down to 25%, I stopped embracing Allah, and everything is good. *You need to understand, we live in a city, on city lots, like 15’ away from each other. They move here from a farm, so they don’t quite get it, you have to be courteous to your neighbors. They would run the yard blower at 6.30am, shit like that. They are learning and they are good folk. |
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[#16]
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[Last Edit: Lumpy223]
[#17]
Pull his well cap and vomit down his well after eating a nice big salad. Re-secure well cap when finished. The gift that keeps on giving.
*This is offered in jest and should not be attempted. |
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Not you typical Elmer Fudd type duck hunter.
To "turn them on" you've got to rub em and talk dirty to them. - pattymcn |
[#18]
Park a vehicle in front of their house seems to trigger most neighbors
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[#19]
List his house for sale for a ridiculous low price with his real cellphone number and say to call anytime 24/7.
(Happened to me 15 years ago when a friend listed a motorcycle for stupid cheap, phone rang 24/7 for a couple of days) |
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Middleofnowhere, Nebraska
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[#20]
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If the truth makes you uncomfortable, don't blame the truth. Blame the lie that made you comfortable. -James Ng Uni
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[#21]
What prize are you hoping to win?
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Never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be. - Adm James Stockdale
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[#22]
Why dont you do something nice like bake him a bunch of cookies. Then when he invites you in ask to use the toilet and take an upper decker
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The mountains are calling, and I must go. -John Muir
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[#23]
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[#24]
Fuck his dog.
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The more the government tells us we should not do a thing or have a thing, the more crucial it is that we do those things and have those things.
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[#25]
over water your lawn
Pee near the property line (where someone can't see you) Get a fire pit and have it make a bunch of smoke when they are in there back yard Use your weed eater, lawn mower, or wood working project that requires hammering at 3 or 4am Sign their mailing address up for gay porn or some other awful thing Sprinkle sugar candy (out of the wrapper) in their yard as close to the house as possible so they get ants |
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An Adventurer from the Internet
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[#26]
Originally Posted By TnMike: I have a D-bag neighbor which the entire neighborhood can’t stand. Unfortunately, I share a property line with him. I’m looking for ways to legally (legally grey okay) to annoy the shit out of him. My one neighbor already shipped him a glitter bomb, so that’s probably out now. I thought about tossing a dead animal over the fence and letting the vultures thrive over there, but not sure of the legality of that. One of the other neighbors talked about putting up “for sale by owner” signs , but sounds like it could be trouble. Your thoughts? View Quote Play Mexican music. Not too loud but just high enough to erk the shit out of him. When he tells you to turn it down, call him a racist. |
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[#27]
This would make a great parody thread:
We have a D-bag neighbor who thinks everyone likes him, but really everyone is just tolerating him. For some reason he can’t stand his next door neighbor. He’s always talking about ways to pick on one of the neighborhood’s kindest residents, a nice 75-year old gentleman, retired Vietnam veteran who’s always friendly and helps others. Everyone is just hoping things don’t get out of hand and our vengeful resident doesn’t resort to violence, because from the looks of things, the 75-year old could wipe the driveway with him. |
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If the truth makes you uncomfortable, don't blame the truth. Blame the lie that made you comfortable. -James Ng Uni
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[#28]
Originally Posted By TnMike: We live in a subdivision in the county. One neighbor has pool parties for their kids (during the day on weekends) and he’s parked a running lawn mower next to their fence. Calls the sheriff every 4th of July on all the neighbors for littering on his property. Calls the Sheriff for unregistered vehicles terrorizing the neighborhood (golf carts). Standing on his property lines teasing his neighbors dogs. He call the sheriff when one of the neighbors were moving in because they had a vehicle “blocking” a fire hydrant. The list goes on. View Quote Why does the 4th of July matter to a Canadian? |
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[#29]
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[#30]
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[#31]
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[#32]
Anyway, they turned the fan down to 25%, I stopped embracing Allah, and everything is good View Quote |
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Stuff I learned from A-Team: 1)Always pity da fool 2)Carry wire cutters (you may need to defuse a bomb or start a car) 3)Never trust a crazy fool 4)Carry grenade launcher/machine guns in the van 5)Know how to weld 6)Love It When A Plan Comes Together
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[#33]
Originally Posted By hhsmiley: Fuck his dog. View Quote Ništa ali logopedi - We are the Serbs (1998 OFFICIAL VIDEO) |
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[#34]
Want some fire ants? J/K
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[Last Edit: wyomingnick]
[#35]
Originally Posted By RealityCheck0311: Just seems like you're opening Pandora's Box when you're actively annoying someone that's permanently next to you. I don't know the entire story but why not take the opposite approach, bring over a 6 pack and try to make peace? View Quote That Purposely drive your neighbor nuts ? Sounds like a good way to escalate it to life altering consequences. Ever see the show fear thy neighbor ? |
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[#36]
either burn his house down or live your best life. don't let others have power over your life
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[#37]
Escalation goes both ways op.
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[#38]
Guinnea Fowl, Bamboo, Peacocks, pot belly pigs
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When one is used to preferential treatment, equality feels like oppression.
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[#39]
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[Last Edit: OscarD]
[#40]
Originally Posted By Kingdead: Are you going to wish you spent your time doing stuff that made you happy or spent more time trying to make your neighbor miserable? View Quote What if they’re the same thing? Call every contractor inside of 50 miles and ask for estimates (his address) on the same day. Siding, windows, gutters, decks, concrete and so on. Sit back and laugh at the 100 mile long line of trucks on your chosen day. As an added bonus he’ll get 7 lbs of flyers in his daily mail for the rest of his life. |
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[Last Edit: OscarD]
[#41]
Originally Posted By Lumpy223: Pull his well cap and vomit down his well after eating a nice big salad. Re-secure well cap when finished. The gift that keeps on giving. *This is offered in jest and should not be attempted. View Quote Locally there was a neighbor dispute where one neighbor dumped a bag of quickrete down the other neighbors sewer clean out. Your post reminded me of that. I’d fucking shoot somebody over either one of those things. |
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[Last Edit: MadMonkey]
[#42]
Originally Posted By TnMike: We live in a subdivision in the county. One neighbor has pool parties for their kids (during the day on weekends) and he’s parked a running lawn mower next to their fence. Calls the sheriff every 4th of July on all the neighbors for littering on his property. Calls the Sheriff for unregistered vehicles terrorizing the neighborhood (golf carts). Standing on his property lines teasing his neighbors dogs. He call the sheriff when one of the neighbors were moving in because they had a vehicle “blocking” a fire hydrant. The list goes on. View Quote So... a neighbor is annoying you by... ETA : 1,2 Maybe I misunderstood. Are you complaining about a loud pool party, or the guy running a lawn mower on his own property during a loud pool party? 3. Getting annoyed once a year by neighbors leaving party shit in his yard 4. Attempting to stop entitled twats from driving their (presumably) not street legal vehicles around his home where children may be playing 5. Trying to prevent actual dangerous behavior like blocking fire hydrants Yeah. That guy deserves all the hell you can give him |
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"Beware the fury of a patient man" - John Dryden
"Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God" - Simon Bradstreet "I may crossdress but I don't dress like a whore" - LittlePony |
[#43]
Isn’t there a TV series dedicated to this topic?
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[#44]
If he’s fastidious about lawn care you could fertilize his yard along the property line. Having a patch of grass that grows 3X faster than the rest of his lawn will gradually drive him nuts.
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[#45]
An ultrasonic sound generator is what you seek.
Worked wonders for me. |
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[#46]
Post free parrot ad with his phone number and address. Free parrot for pick up, first come first serve. African Grey Parrot. Sit back and watch the stream of people knocking on his front door.
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[#47]
Originally Posted By Riply21: Fuck his wife View Quote and their daughters.... Seriously, you want to start a feud with an asshole that lives right next door to you? If you think he's an asshole now, just wait until you are both rolling around in the mud together. There will come a day when the tit for tat gets the better of both of you, then all bets are off. Ignore him, unless he is doing something illegal, then get the law involved. |
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[#48]
The #1 reason asshole neighbors are assholes is because they don't give a shit about their neighbors. You're not going to annoy him into giving a shit, and you clearly care more than he does.
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[#49]
Outdoor spotlights somewhat pointed at his house.
I had a similar situation. Neighbor and I had a heated conversation. Both aired our grievances. We both made accommodations. Now we get along. |
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[#50]
Get yourself a nice home backup generator and keep it exercised for inclement weather
Detroit 6-71 Startup |
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