Maybe he lost his kidneys?

nothing hotter than a 50 yo in a thong

After nearly a month of absence, y’all have roped me back into this thread.

I’m probably the least qualified to post in a modern dating thread, b/c I’ve been with the best, truly beautiful woman I can imagine since 1991.  A true ‘life partner’ since before that term was officially coined.  A woman who has honestly been by my side since before I was anything, through good times and bad, and has helped and driven me to be the best man I could ever be.  And she is still a real beauty at 52 years old.  Fuck everyone who thinks that at that age a woman can’t be beautiful.  And tough.  If I got divorced tomorrow, I would gladly give her 1/2 of everything we own…she really earned it, in a supportive role (despite having her own BS degree).  She works every day in our businesses, and still manages to cook me three meals a day.  If she hears ice rattle in my glass, she jumps to fix me another iced tea or cocktail.  No joke.

One thing I feel should be pointed out, and I am as guilty as everyone on this board when it comes down to it…although I was fortunate to find and marry a beautiful woman, who shares my values, work ethic, and type of upbringing;  I have since come to realize that looks are one part of attraction, and worth is another.

What I mean is, I look at all the threads here (Guilty/Not Guilty, Amber Heard, Jessica Biel vs. Jessica Alba, Wood/Wood Knot, Big Red Tits vs. Big ‘Ol Blue Tits, etc., etc.), and based on looks alone, I most often find myself voting AGAINST what most here would agree are fairly attractive women.  (Note- Jessica Alba, if she didn’t have herpes, would be on my To Do list!).

However, in my personal life (rural, agricultural/ranching background, equine DVM), the women I find most attractive are the women that are capable, independent, hard workers, responsible, share my political beliefs, my constitutional beliefs, my moral and ethical values, etc.  

Note, that hasn’t turned a 4/10 into a 9/10…but has turned many a 6/10 into a 10/10.  

I have worked with many a woman (ages 18-50) who has literally worked 18-20 hour days with me for months on end, in all kinds of weather, taken serious criticism usually not buffered by political or social correctness, women who have saved my life in dangerous situations and been saved by me in similar situations (involving large animals).  I can count on ONE HAND the number of men that have been able to fill that role, but have seriously lost count in the last 30 years of the women that have done so for me.  Badass, tough, good-looking women who can outperform most men at nearly any task they put their minds to.  Most of which I would trust with my life again without asking twice.

I have one that has worked for me for well over 20 years now, that I would seriously consider my very best friend (besides my wife), and I have a few friends that have been Do-or-Die friends for over 35 years. You fuckers are likely looking past the best women you will ever know, just because they don’t look like the typical Instagram attention whore you have been conditioned to admire.

Again, my wife is still honestly beautiful all these years later, not just through rose-colored glasses.  But I can say, I have known more than my fair share of women that could nearly be her equal in looks and abilities.  

@Geralt55, as always enjoy your advice to the young men on this board.  I wish I had your way with words.  I would subscribe to your podcast.

I once took down an older lady. Afterwards she made a pizza.

I met a strange lady, she made me real nervous
She took me in and gave me breakfast

Did she make you go down under.

Where women glow and men plunder!

You're selling yourself short, that was a wonderful read man, that post. Whether our styles are fancy or "simple", if it evokes emotion or gets someone thinking, it's effective, that's what I think.

I sat here thinking for a few minutes before responding, being truthful.

Know what's funny? It sounds almost crazy but, I kinda think I'm "the moderate" in this situation in life . (I fuckin hate this position lmao)
I did NOT go through a gut-punching divorce.
I don't hate women at all, please.
I also didn't get to live through what you have, some of that good stuff.

I'm at a midpoint. I once didn't have dating options, at all.
Now I'm a man who has some degree (but a mortal degree) of options.


But if I could trade all that?
The time, years, the hundreds of conversations I've had on the sites, the dates, the reading, watching girls age out of having kids , the thinking work, all that?
Traded in for meeting a nice woman earlier and never having done a minute of the "Dating" thing?
Fuckin would.
Sure would.

"I didn't choose to become a Witcher."

Didn't choose it, life sorta went that way. At least that's how I feel.


I'm not a "church" religious person but, as I'm getting older I sometimes think that sometimes things aren't accidents. I sometimes wonder if I was meant to go this route, so I could help a few other people work through their routes.

I'm mulling over, as SBR_slut suggested in another thread, writing a substack. I'm not sure I'm in it to try to get a 15 minutes of fame, I'm just hoping maybe I could help 5 or 6 guys and entertain some people every so so .

i'd rather date 20 year olds than 50 year olds

Like when she invites you to her dungeon and introduces you to her sex furniture collection

They're greatful when you rock their world and don't break Their hip

I just want to take a moment and say I enjoyed reading that.

??

You have a beautiful mind. No homo.

None of what I posted is directed at anyone in particular.  Damn sure not you.  It’s just my rambling thoughts when I look back at all the women that have touched my life in one way or another.

I see so many on here lament the lack of prospects in their lives, who think that they never come in contact with suitable women in their careers or day-to-day lives.  Yet here I am in a low population, rural setting, with a Boomer-ish mindset (although I’m GenX), and I literally meet women every week that, if I weren’t happily married, would be serious contenders for LTRs.  And that a good man wouldn’t be “settling” for.  These women range in age from late teens to late forties.  Fit, active, good looking, mentally engaging, capable, confident women.  My standards are still high, and I’m not anything special, but I can’t believe I’m alone in this regard.  I may just be one of a few who can recognize the potential of a good woman (and no, I don’t tolerate sluts, nor do I idolize mediocre women).

I truly think that social media, to include everything from Facebook & IG through OnlyFans and PornHub, has conditioned the average male to think that anything less than the fake-titted, big-lipped, airbrushed attention whore so prevalent on the internet today is not worth a second look.  In reality, those that prioritize such women seem to be the ones always telling a tale of woe.

Keep up the coaching, bro…I’m always good for a beer if you get within a hundred miles or so.

My woman is 4 years my senior, she's about to turn 49 this year.

Dated a woman for ~8 years, off and on in my 20's. She was 13 years my senior. I was just a boy toy, "cabana boy" as she called it. It was cool, she had money, a nice house, and owned fast cars. She'd treat me to anything as long as I did the dirty when she asked.

My girlfriend is ten years older than I am. She can't get pregnant. I consider that a win win.

I have a guilty pleasure series called Love On The Spectrum which follows (and helps) autistic people find partners.  Sometimes it's just a matter of following their journey through online dating or whatnot and sometimes the show will set them up on blind dates with other autistic or otherwise non-neurotypical people.  

I binged the last season a few days ago and met Steve.  Steve is 63 and, although *different* his entire life, was only diagnosed with autism 2 years ago.  Steve has never had a relationship.  Steve has a life coach and a personal assistant he enlisted to help him maneuver the world of online dating because Steve is desperate for a woman in his life.  Steve is very sweet, soft-spoken, and wants to brighten the day of everyone he meets.  Steve says he wants a woman who is warm, kind, supportive, understands and accepts his limitations, and *gets* his oddball sense of humor.  

Steve meets up with Candida.  Candida is tall, slim, with black hair and blue eyes.  (IMO she was ugly as sin.....looked like what Idina Menzel would look like if she were made up to be a psychotic evil witch for a movie----bad skin, huge nose, CRAZY EYES)  She walks up and Steve stares and says, "Beautiful.  Oh my.  Wonderful."  They spend time in awkward conversation.  He makes a pun about her name (what he's known for) and she stares in silence.  Candida turns down a request for a second date.  

Steve's assistant helps him with an online dating profile and he matches up with Connie.  Steve meets up with Connie.  Connie is short, obese, with pink hair and an easy smile.  She walks up and Steve stares and says, "Wow.  Oh.  Wow.  Um."  They spend time laughing and joking.  She asks questions about him and his life.  She makes a pun out of his name.  She asks him out for a second date.  Steve turns her down.  Steve tells his assistant (or life coach, can't remember which) that there was no chemistry.  



I mean, it was like a perfect snapshot of the impression I've always gotten from the dating woes threads here.

ETA  Can't find a picture of Candida but this is Steve and Connie on their date.

https://www.distractify.com/p/steve-love-on-the-spectrum-us-job

One thing nice about dating older chicks is that they know that their sell by date has long passed and they have little to offer.  They usually get right down to business.  This means great blow jobs and minimal drama.  They know they're totally expendable and bring little to the table.

I say something fairly similar on a regular basis, and I get told none of that matters if she doesn’t meet some predetermined beauty standard, and that men don’t really care about who she is in the face of pretty and fertile, and those are the real determinants of a quality partner.

And to that, I say



If that’s all a man is going to prioritize, then I don’t feel bad when that’s all he gets.

"Geralt55, as always enjoy your advice to the young men on this board.  I wish I had your way with words."


Sorry I ah, Idk, quoted my post and, then that @ me part.
Kinda thought that,
It's aright never mind




Wherever I end up putting the next batch of thoughts, there are 2 stories I want to share that were pretty darn impactful.
I think a lot of guys who are done on dating might like to hear



Pause here - my belief is that the "cultural rot" going on in suburbia and urban areas (the blue-state cultural herp and derp) is less severe here.
TBH it was after talking to Naamah that I started to think, there ARE some "pockets" in the country where it looks more like yesteryear.
I fucking hope that's the case and it makes me happy to know that not all of this place is trying to do this:

Attached File




We have some overlap in experience here - I think because I've seen and encountered a few marriageable ones, it's made it easy to have the "moderate" view.
The old redpill maxim of, "Don't get married, don't ever get married", I couldn't buy it.



So this is where we disagree
- We agree on marriage and a stable family being a basis for a strong society.
- I think we agree on the fact that there ARE quality women out there, more in supply than a heartbroken 20 year old in a big city might even believe - (we might have disagreements on the % of society those women comprise ).
- I think it's still worth getting married, even though it's risky
- I think Onlyfans and Pornhub and all that has been destructive to men and women alike
I'm not saying we "ban" it with laws, but it's had negative effects, and the "But That Wasn't REAL communism Sex-Pollution" defenses are kinda weak.

I don't for a moment think that the normal to average guys can't date because he wants a plastic-surgery lady.
I'm going to throw high inside a moment, but brother I didn't hit the life lottery and  find my soulmate in 1991 in a rural area - I'm in a 2022 hellscape
RIGHT up close to the cultural rot reactor spill, in a blue area in a blue state on a coast.
I'm staring right at "The elephant's foot", I can "taste metal", I'm around other guys with the cultural radiation burns and I've patched a few up in my time - I can tell you what I'm looking at.  

Where we diverge is, While I think it's a complex problem, a complicated situation and I've written dozens of textwalls about it?
If I had to boil it down to one thing, I believe the problem comes down to, as a whole, average women won't date average men.
IMHO THAT is the best explanation that  fits the most scenarios, period.
That's how Kevin Samuels (who recently passed away) launched to fame.
He had to tell an average looking single mom who "wouldn't settle" for a man she could actually date, that she was "average at best."

He could be a jerk, he was a deeply flawed man in just, so many ways.

But he was, at times, telling some unpopular truths that people would whisper about for fear of being destroyed.

Check this out, these 2 screenshots I personally took.

Attached File


Attached File



I don't screenshot all of them.
These girls certainly aren't beautiful plastic surgery IG girls
The volumes and volumes of this are unreal.
As someone who DID date a long time, and has seen many many many thousands of profiles?
I'm not telling you men are some pure creatures, I'm saying that women most certainly fuckin aren't.

I think the "heh guys just chase pornstars!" meme plays well at BBQs for attaboys, it's a "socially allowed" palatable explanation, and heck I think there are men who it would apply to.
I just think that's a small % of men, and the "average girl won't date her level" problem is a large % of women in 2022, and more accurately explains (As a "single" factor explanation anyway) what's wrong.





At some point I do think I'd like to meet the forum people.

I kinda laughed like... if/when I meet somebody, how am I gunna explain

"Baabe.
So now that we're in _____state_______, I think I have to visit some person on the internet I know"
"..what?"
"Well like, okay. So, on this like, outdoor board right, I used to verbally joust with some people- and like, we argued a ton, but we ended up respecting eachother.
And at some point years into all this a few consensus ideas were reached and we started to shift as a culture from, a hostile space to a gentrified dating thread one."
"................."
"I knowww, I know it sounds crazy and maybe it is but, life's crazy "

Negative!

>2023
>Be on substack
>"Anyone here ever shitposted before?"
>"Yes, I shitposted with you on GD"
>"You can help me -"

Sent you a PM to clarify the bolded part.

As to the rest, as I mentioned in my earlier post, I know I'm not the best qualified to speak on the problems of the modern dating world.  But I am still a data point to be calculated in the average.

In regards to women and unrealistic demands and expectations...while, again, I'm married and not in the game, that doesn't affect my advice about them.  That advice is - I wouldn't spend a single millisecond of my life considering them, they simply don't exist to me, don't even register.  While not in the dating market, I am in a business where, along with the good women I've spoken of, I also meet some women who act that way about nearly everything.  Demands, demands, demands; arrogant, entitled, loud, pushy, etc.  What do I do?  I ignore their poor behavior, tell them once what I am offering to do for them, what my qualifications and abilities are, how I will treat them in our professional/business relationship, and what type of behavior I will tolerate in return.  Then "Please let me know if you want to continue doing business with me.  If so, we'll start over on the right foot and forget all about this.  If not, thanks for your time".  Period, end of discussion.

You would be shocked and amazed at how well this works (95% of the time, it works every time ).  Most of these women I can go on to have a very long-term, mutually beneficial client relationship with, a few leave and probably tell everyone what an asshole I am, but I wouldn't know because I forget they ever existed and move on with life.

Admittedly, this doesn't directly apply to the dating game, but you know what?  It allows me to have a great relationship and appreciate and respect all the good women I deal with, set boundaries with the rest (and have a lot of decent relationships with those, too), without having to tolerate or deal with the toxic pieces of shit on any level at all.  Keeps me from ever thinking all women are like that.  It works for me.  

As for meeting people off the internet...IDK, we're all just people.  I meet new people every single week, if not every day.  Doesn't feel strange that some of them could probably be on internet boards also.  Or meeting Ham radio operators.  Or rodeo clowns.  Just plain old folks most of the time, it's a net positive if we share some common interests as well.

Forgive my sense of humor but, my FIRST thought is - when Trump used to do those interviews in front of the helicopter and he'd be like shouting over the rotorblades

Attached File


"I JUST HAD A GREAT CONVERSATION WITH REDANGUS, GREAT GUY OKAY, FANTASTIC REALLY -
IT WAS A GREAT CONVERSATION, THE BEST, BEST CONVERSATION, REALLY TREMENDOUS BUT YOU WON'T REPORT ON THAT CNN."






So I'll use Naamah as an example - her and I used to joust a ton back in the day.
But let me trace my thought process:

So Naamah is not stupid, and not crazy. She's not dumb, she's not hallucinating. She doesn't make things up out of whole cloth when she's speaking from her experiences and things that she saw.
If she SAW it she SAW it, I trust her word to be good, and that she's faithfully describing what she saw, as best she can, in her words.

She's not a morally bankrupt person, she's a loving wife, great ma, I jokingly called her "Mama Grizzly", a nickname I formulated based on her toughness, protectiveness of her family, and she lives in real America without the crime and taxes Flyover Country^TM.

So if she's saying something I think doesn't necessarily fit as a BEST explanation for a topic, and I KNOW she's not one of those above "Bad" things?
What does that mean?
Well, it means, IMHO, she is seeing what she is seeing, to some degree -but that we have a disagreement on how frequent or common that thing is.
People can disagree and still respect and like eachother as people, which I do think that way of her.

There was ONE time she threw a very errant guesstimate - and that doesn't change the above.
People are imperfect, they're mortal, they get things wrong, they occasionally make mistakes, that's what makes them people.
Please I'm going to fuck something up TO-DAY.
If we're going to put people in jail for minor F-ups, we're going to have to start building more jails.

So Re: some of these dating-world 2022^TM things? I felt: Look if I REALLY think there are 1 or 2 different things going on?
And if even good people maybe don't "Get it" because maybe they didn't see it?
Why don't I take it upon myself to describe it to them.

They don't need to get radiation poisoning too, to know what I'm seeing
Why don't I just do a better job of describing it and defining it - and after they've had time to really think about it, mentally work with it, test it, MAYBE they incorporate 1 or 2 ideas into their worldview model.

That's how I see it.





Couldn't agree more. "Run right by them", don't even look back, is probably for the best.
I think a lot of - in particular younger guys- who see younger girls (lets say in college) act like brats and do this, but then they're "rewarded" (or it seems so), the guys think life will just go this way.
That it never catches up with these girls.
Guys if you're reading this, it does. For a lot of them, it does.  

At some point you watch these girls tick upward in age, and start aging out of having children (whether they wanted to or not), and it actually makes you sad.




This is Alpha^TM AF . That's old world masculine - if I'm blessed with kids, sons, I'll be trying to remember to teach them that. If it's not illegal in the future.
So, I'm finding as time goes on for me, I realized that a bunch of the women who kept me around, reach back out to me?
Brainy, ah, a little lower in agreeableness at times (too much for my taste tbh ), they can argue, and damn they beat most people in arguments, you can smell it.
They get to me, and I have the verbal tools to handle them.

The vibe, Calanthe roasting Geralt and telling him she can have him tortured, and he more or less tells her, "Sorry not interested ".
Girls like that like a man who can occasionally say "no".



I'm still working out that concept model.
If you'd like to share more I'm all ears .








So here's the thing that's had me thinking lately.
YOU have good people skills. Solid ones. Ease in making friends, tools to deal with disagreeable people, track record of long relationships - you do that, everywhere you go.
In the football sense? "Gee everywhere this guy goes, there's a top 10 defense
Gee it's like everytime this happens the points allowed shoots way fuckin down
The guy leaves and points allowed goes back up
If wonder if there's a pattern here??"

Yeappppppppppp.

What kills me is - some of the best hard won skills you've learned - the environment today for young 18 year old guys today?
Not totally the same.
Certainly not everywhere.


As time's going on I'm getting less worried for me, I'm getting worried for the guys who don't know where to start.  
For that guy who had a narcissist first girlfriend.
For that guy in college in a STEM field, 90% dudes, the girls are impossible ,the apps are worse.
For that dude that got married to his HS sweetheart, she became schizophrenic when it surfaced in her mid 20s, he's starting over at 39, doesn't know where to begin.

It's not about me, it's about them.
I'm not thinking I should write this stuff because, I'm perfect (not at all), or I know everything (lmao ), or any of that.
Fuck, we got Kevin Samuels, not because he was perfect but because he gave a damn.


I think we as men, the guys who LIKE women and want to see other guys get married and have relationships,  need to start talking about some of this stuff - and honestly, for our society's sake.

Incorrect. Drama at 20 is also drama at 70.

I agree completely, but you're gonna have to figure out a way to talk about it with shorter posts. A guy who can't even figure out how to get his own pussy sure as hell don't have the attention span to read a novel about what he's doing wrong.

Simple answer. Don’t do it. If that’s all you can get, improve yourself.

Growing up I was always confused about this: I didn't know why they kept putting me in Honors English classes
I wanted to do engineering and design things, I wasn't interested, they kept drafting me.
Those poor professors had a heck of a time trying to reel me in at times
They largely liked me

I could usually corral the disinterested (male) students (at the back of the class) into paying attention.
But I think they probably called me "Wild Thing."



Great fastball, but total control over it all the time?
Some days are better than others

I'm seeing more and more men just walking away because it's not worth the trouble. Most of them are good guys who want a family, children and all this shit.

Finding a halfway decent woman for an average man?  

Good luck.

MGTOW thread.

That's another thought on my mind.
The risks are higher today than they once were.
The "Game" is different.
The "prizes" are worse




BUT
I'm not sure it's impossible.
I think as many of us should try as possible.
Look at this.

Attached File




There's no guarantee I meet another good lady I'd marry, life's not about guarantees, it's about chances and choices.
I have a CHANCE to do this, and I CHOOSE to try as hard as I have to, for as long as I have to, to do this.
I'm not better than anyone else, I'm really not.
I'm just saying if I'm going, a lot of the other guys can come along too.
I think they should think about it.

Geralts idea sounds good, but it's useless like Putins talking with his Generals about winning the war.

The Ukrainians are keep saying "nyet" like women keep saying no.

Dang you guys have been busy in here. When I got home from work and saw this thread pop up, I figured it was just the random post or two we've been getting to keep it alive.

So we get that you're married... but what about them?

I do come across a good deal of what are, as far as I can determine from the limited contact, good women who would be LTR material. But they are nearly all in relationships already - which is not surprising, really. Something would be wrong if pickings didn't become slimmer as time went on (meaning as you age, not in comparing young people of different time frames), as those who are marriage-material will tend to be paired up first.

I was happy as shit I had two and a half pages to read all at one time

you're 15 years late to the party, son.

good women get picked off early by alphas in high school and/or college and are protected.

Is it true older ladies take a little longer for the engine oil to get circulating?

Yeah, I don't get that. I mean, I too hear it all the time, but I do not understand what it would be like to think that way.

For me, attraction is binary - either I find someone attractive or I don't, and being more attractive does not win you any "extra points". There is a minimum standard only, and no further weight given. I'm not going to overlook some major incompatibility just because I think you are super-duper-attractive. I also disagree with the whole number-rating thing, as it implies some sort of global standard... I can rank a set of women in order of relative attractiveness, sure, but it is silly to try to give out standalone "ratings".

Attached File

Going into a world of pain?



There are so many distractions out there, it's easy to live for years without even thinking about getting into a relationship or going on dates.

Depends on the driver. But all the myths and rumors of dryness-while medically possible-depends on how hot she can get. Because everything I’ve learned about older-and most-women in GD was wrong.

Like asking my friends when we were 12 if Santa Claus was real and they said yes…

Sometimes.

That's why I keep a can of Crisco on the nightstand.

Which is my advice to young men is to actually give dating some level of focus, and not think "oh, something will just happen".



It's not even necessarily a matter of distraction... it simply is easy to live on without even thinking about relationships. Well, at least when you are younger. Even though we men don't face as many issues regarding potential reproduction as we age, the passage of time can start to wear on you the same.

I went on for a very long time without giving dating any real thought. If something happened, cool, but it was never on my mind. I did not make any active attempts - I didn't make a point to go out to additional social events to increase "exposure", nor was I on any sites/apps (though I did try once, you all should know that story by now ). I was always of the mentality that something was bound to happen eventually, just keep doing my thing and it would work itself out.

Well, that quite a while ago now. I had started to think about things a bit more as I had aged, and a conversation with friends at work lead to me getting on a few of the sites. Things have actually sort of gone downhill since, as my experience on them has been more negative than positive overall. While going the online route did land me the only dates I have been on since college, it's also caused me to think more about the whole thing and realize how I squandered what little opportunity I had when I was younger. While I don't dwell on it, it still doesn't exactly give me encouragement, especially coupled with the overall net negative of my time online dating thus far.

But while I may have given up in some respects, I have not given up hope for the greater humanity. I do not believe that the problem is a lack of good women out there (or that all women are inherently bad or whatever). For my own situation, I blame no one but myself.