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Posted: 6/13/2019 9:53:23 AM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
In the process of adoption.  I've been the only Dad she's known 
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Posted: 6/13/2019 9:53:44 AM EDT
[#2]
I was truly blessed with having a great step-father (I consider him my Dad). He is responsible for making me the man that I am today, and use him as my example for how to conduct myself in life. I shudder to think of what my life could have been like had he decided not to marry my Mom. In the right situation, being a step-parent can make all the difference in a child's life.
My father was/is a POS that I haven't spoken to in 27 years. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 9:54:35 AM EDT
[#3]
Already am.
My daughters are awesome. I'm blessed to have them in my life. ETA: Biological father is deceased; he died when they were 8 months old. Obviously, they have no memories of him, only a few pictures. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 9:57:00 AM EDT
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted: You actually think you get a choice in the matter?   |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 9:57:56 AM EDT
[#5]
That would require something happening to my husband, which I pray never happens.
But I would consider being an adoptive parent. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:01:57 AM EDT
[#6]
I adopted my stepdaughter. She is my daughter.
The only time I really have to clarify that, is when I get into a conversation with people and the timeline I give them doesn't make sense. After I explain that I married into a ready made family, and then adopted my oldest daughter, it's pretty clear to them. Most people don't realize she is not my natural daughter, and are often surprised when I explain the entire situation. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:19:23 AM EDT
[#7]
Sure. It's all the fun of the good times but none of the personal feeling of failure when they fuck up.
I'm kidding. Mostly. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:20:48 AM EDT
[#8]
If or when my current marriage goes down the shitter, I will never be married again.
Renting is much cheaper in the long run and you can change models if you so choose and those models will never have a storage compartment for extra baggage like kids. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:35:54 AM EDT
[#9]
I have a step daughter. I've been in her life since she was two, she's nine now. I don't love her in the same way I love my biological children, but I have a love for her and would do anything to protect, provide, and take care of her. Her dad is in the picture and she's very much her daddy's girl so there's that disconnect with me and her as well.
Being a stepdad isn't always fun and barely ever rewarding, at least in my experience. But I love her mother so that's why I do it. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:36:29 AM EDT
[#10]
My step brother remarried and his 2nd wife claims to be his kids mother even though the real mother claims the kids hers and fully participated in their lives.
Kids have two women with their idea of how they should be raised. Poor bastards. Both women suck. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:44:11 AM EDT
[#11]
It would be a VERY tough sell, but I can't say that it would never happen. Circumstances would have to be just right, woman just right, and kids not shit heads.
This is only an indicator of one's self worth if you jump into a shitty situation. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:47:37 AM EDT
[#12]
Didn't see an appropriate response.
It would make an initial relationship highly unlikely. Given the natural level of drama with females I'd pass on the probable uptick. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:51:51 AM EDT
[#13]
I've seen some work, some flame out spectacularly.
I do not want it |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:53:27 AM EDT
[#14]
It's easy to say no, as a hypothetical. Until you meet someone you like. And then you meet their kid, and you like the kid(s), too.
I didn't plan to remarry, either. 
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:55:33 AM EDT
[#15]
Not at this stage in my life unless a lot of boxes are checked off by the mom. I tried it when I first separated from the wife but it was a total train wreck that really threw me for a loop. My son is now in college and I really enjoy being single. It's so much easier now.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 10:56:01 AM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She'd have to be a solid 10. too many of you guys are superficial. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:02:16 AM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
what do looks have anything to do with anything? thats a shallow view that will end in relationship failure. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
She'd have to be a solid 10. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:03:25 AM EDT
[#18]
I'm in my mid - fourties now and past the point in my life of raising younger kids. So if (God Forbid) I found myself single I wouldn't get serious with a woman who has them. Nothing personal, I'm just past that point in my life.
Honestly, if I ever found myself single again I'd prefer to date a woman who's kids had already grown and began lives of their own. I do know that I would never date a woman who had "failure-to-launch" grown- kids, though. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:09:41 AM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
That's a terrible analogy. Those three guys went in there because someone had to do it or a lot of people would have died. If it wasn't them it would have been someone else. You don't have to marry a woman with children from another guy and raise them as your own. That's something a person chooses to do. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted: This is how we get liberals.... No father's. Where do you think we would be if those 3 Russian dudes said "I'm not draining the water, I didn't create this mess"? 
We do it because it must be done. And incidentally, I love my step daughter.  Being a step parent is what we must do to ensure the kids have a stable family life. It may be hard, but I believe we need to do it. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:14:25 AM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Once I told a girl I'd date her if she gave her 3 year old up for adoption. We were married for 5 years. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:22:10 AM EDT
[#21]
Poll choices suck. To answer your question, no I would never be a step-parent. If something happened to my wife, I would not remarry. If I were single, I wouldn't marry someone who had kids.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:27:30 AM EDT
[#22]
I would have considered it a personal failure to take someone else's kids on before having my own.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:28:10 AM EDT
[#23]
It's certainly MAJOR points against, but not an impossible hill to climb. Be much easier if the father was completely gone. I don't like the idea of being with someone with a lingering past relationship.
Although it's really more a barrier to entry for me. It's going to be hard to convince me to start dating a woman who already has children, but if the one I've been in love with for a long time already gave me a chance after having a kid I wouldn't pass that up. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:37:14 AM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I’m increasingly of the opinion that it’s something a guy with a healthy sense of self worth would not do. But few men know their own value in our society. 
GD in every other thread: The collapse of society is inevitably near and one of the major contributing factors is a lack of male role models in single parent homes. GD in this thread: Fuck no I would never be a step dad and anyone who does has very low self esteem and should be looked down upon. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:37:45 AM EDT
[#25]
Need new poll option.
Kids whose father has died. Getting older, you meet a lot of widows. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:45:04 AM EDT
[#26]
Mostly no with a huge depends.
My issue is with being #1 with a lady for at least a short time. So many single mothers already have a permanent #1, their kid, which makes dumping a step-dad as easy as snapping fingers. It's been my experience that it devalues time spent with the mother. Maybe I'm greedy that I need that, but at least I recognize it. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:50:31 AM EDT
[#27]
I know ONE single mother that is worth marrying. She is an amazing, intelligent and beautiful woman. She's completely self sufficient and has a very understated confidence to tackle anything. Her father which was a huge part of her life passed not all too long ago and was kind of THE MAN is her life. So I get phones calls like... (She lives several hours away right now) "Hey how do I set up and put out the mooring at the lake house? Oh and what do I need to do to spring commission the boat?" Then with a brief explanation "Ok got it" and off she goes to succeed at the task.
Unlike the other 99.999% of other single mothers I know who are basically a walking shit show with almost nothing worth saying about them other than Oh shes beautiful BUT..... |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 1:13:23 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
GD in every other thread: The collapse of society is inevitably near and one of the major contributing factors is a lack of male role models in single parent homes. GD in this thread: Fuck no I would never be a step dad and anyone who does has very low self esteem and should be looked down upon. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
I’m increasingly of the opinion that it’s something a guy with a healthy sense of self worth would not do. But few men know their own value in our society.
GD in every other thread: The collapse of society is inevitably near and one of the major contributing factors is a lack of male role models in single parent homes. GD in this thread: Fuck no I would never be a step dad and anyone who does has very low self esteem and should be looked down upon.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 2:24:12 PM EDT
[#29]
Nope. Someone here once said it's like playing another guys saved hand, they were right.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 2:31:33 PM EDT
[#30]
Yes I did. My wife and I both are step parents as she and I both had two daughters when we married. That was 13 years ago, and I have never regretted it.
They are on their own now and we miss them a lot. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 2:43:13 PM EDT
[#31]
Nope. I'd be a terrible parent, regardless of if they're my own or not.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 3:06:55 PM EDT
[#32]
The boy went military, and is now married with two kids of his own. The girl starts college in the fall.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 3:42:02 PM EDT
[#33]
Sure, why not? I took on my oldest boy just after he turned three and 25 years later I don't regret it. Both him and my natural son have both turned out to be good hard workers with good heads on their shoulders. I would like to think I had a little to do with that motivation to be good men.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 4:08:09 PM EDT
[#34]
It has worked well for me. I enjoy my time with my step daughter and have married the best woman I have ever known. My step daughter is 16 in a few weeks and is an amazing young lady with her life very much on the right track due in part to my contributions to her life. I am very thankful to have my "saved game" and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Being a step parent is clearly not for everyone. Never would have expected such visceral hate for step parents as I have seen here.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 4:10:36 PM EDT
[#35]
Been there, done that, got my heart ripped out. No, I probably wouldn't do it again.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 4:35:30 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
No, I’m not a beta cuck. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 4:47:28 PM EDT
[#37]
I am and it's been one of the better decisions I've ever made.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 5:31:17 PM EDT
[#38]
Well the woman has to meet a few of my requirements
1) I have to be attracted to the woman enough to deal 2) Baby daddy isn't a piece of shit 3) she has a decent job/ is trying to improve her quality of life. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 5:41:23 PM EDT
[#39]
I'm not interested in raising anyone else's child.
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Posted: 6/13/2019 5:46:34 PM EDT
[#40]
Did for 1998-2006- his mom was a cheating bitch
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Posted: 6/13/2019 5:58:01 PM EDT
[#41]
I have been married for 16 years and my wife and I are raising our own two boys.
I can't imagine being a step father. I wouldn't want to do it, but I am sure I would give it my best shot if I had to. Kudos to those of you that are. It must have its own unique challenges. |
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Posted: 6/13/2019 11:21:24 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Kids whose dad dies fighting for their country or in the line of duty need a good male role model in their lives too. I hope you feel bad for forgetting about that situation. That's probably about the only way it would happen for me. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
No, I’m not a beta cuck. |
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