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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:21:11 AM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Get a GOOD California King mattress and a marriage therapist. They're 6' x 7' , and if you both can't fit on there with tons of room to spare, try to pick up some old Richard Simmons videos and workout a little. Poor and short people disgust me, but I'm not sure which disgusts me more. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:21:52 AM EDT
[#2]
No way. I love having her close, and she loves having me close. It's nice to be able to roll over and give her body a gentle caress....
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:25:04 AM EDT
[#3]
Sometimes.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:25:59 AM EDT
[#4]
No. We're not the Flintstones.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:28:22 AM EDT
[#5]
I also highly suggest box fans for you light sleepers. Once you go pink or brown you never go back.
My mom constantly complains of waking up several times a night but refuses to try a box fan. I had to spend the night there recently and the term *deafening silence* is a thing for a reason. Even when there wasn't a click of the AC cutting on or the ice maker in the fridge rumbling or the sound of a car driving down the street it was like my brain couldn't NOT focus on how quiet it was instead of shutting off and letting me sleep. I don't see how you people live like that. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:29:47 AM EDT
[#6]
We have slept in separate beds for probably the past 15 years. I am a snorer and she is a light sleeper. She is a twitcher with rls, sleeps like Peg Bundy and will literally knee me in the back all night. Our sleep is so much better since we moved to separate beds. I know a lot of couples who sleep in separate beds for good sleep health.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:30:57 AM EDT
[#7]
I snore,...so.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:31:33 AM EDT
[#8]
No I sleep with my wife.
In the same bed in the same room. With no clothes on with the heat down very low or the A/C very low with huge blankets on us and even in our advanced age we play footsie. That’s what people who are married 50 years do. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:32:38 AM EDT
[#9]
I have insomnia and am up until 2-4 in the morning. To get any sleep she sleeps in another room. After being married for 43 years this is the way life is.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:34:14 AM EDT
[#10]
We sleep in separate chairs
 I have bad hips and a bad back. I found that I can sleep relatively well in a recliner cause of how it bends my legs and back when it is reclined. My wife sleeps in the other one. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:35:04 AM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I also highly suggest box fans for you light sleepers. Once you go pink or brown you never go back. My mom constantly complains of waking up several times a night but refuses to try a box fan. I had to spend the night there recently and the term *deafening silence* is a thing for a reason. Even when there wasn't a click of the AC cutting on or the ice maker in the fridge rumbling or the sound of a car driving down the street it was like my brain couldn't NOT focus on how quiet it was instead of shutting off and letting me sleep. I don't see how you people live like that. Agreed. I can't sleep without a monotonous drone in the background. When I travel I use a noise app on my phone. Silence is awful. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:36:00 AM EDT
[#12]
F that Bud.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 9:53:44 AM EDT
[#13]
We did for a couple years until I got a CPAP.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 10:23:02 AM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Agreed. I can't sleep without a monotonous drone in the background. When I travel I use a noise app on my phone. Silence is awful. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: I also highly suggest box fans for you light sleepers. Once you go pink or brown you never go back. My mom constantly complains of waking up several times a night but refuses to try a box fan. I had to spend the night there recently and the term *deafening silence* is a thing for a reason. Even when there wasn't a click of the AC cutting on or the ice maker in the fridge rumbling or the sound of a car driving down the street it was like my brain couldn't NOT focus on how quiet it was instead of shutting off and letting me sleep. I don't see how you people live like that. Agreed. I can't sleep without a monotonous drone in the background. When I travel I use a noise app on my phone. Silence is awful. I didn’t used to need white noise, but after years of my husband sleeping with the fan on, it’s harder to fall asleep without. Not impossible, but harder. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 10:42:34 AM EDT
[#15]
I used the ocean, distant thunder, and rainstorm sleep sounds for the past few years when my wife is out of the house.
My current favorite is creaking ship. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 10:42:41 AM EDT
[#16]
Quoted: Firstly, there is no turmoil in my marriage. We were talking tonight about how folks used to sleep in separate beds. We casually tossed the idea around because we both like to stretch out. We are already practicing this once a week where she sleeps in the bed and I sleep on our incredibly comfortable couch (Not lying. I've preferred couches over beds for years). Anybody else sleep separately from their spouse? Hide the Pain 
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Posted: 4/15/2023 11:02:14 AM EDT
[#17]
My wife and I sleep on a split, sleep number bed. She keeps her half at 35 and I keep mine at 80. We have our own sheets and blankets, so we don't fight over them all night. We both sleep like lambs.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 11:10:32 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: In the history of monogamy, there have been zero healthy relationships that involve sleeping on separate furniture, let alone in separate rooms. This. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 1:36:25 PM EDT
[#19]
Sleep how you want and what works best for the both of you. Sometimes sleeping in the same bed just doesn't work for work or health reasons.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 1:52:44 PM EDT
[#20]
Firm believer in separate beds in the same room. It's the more common arrangement everywhere but here anyway.
If you've got the space, it just works out better. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:06:34 PM EDT
[#21]
King sized bed, petite wife, zero clothes.
Gargantuan enjoyment. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:11:55 PM EDT
[#22]
Same bed. Separate mattresses now, for a while.
King size with independent raise and lower feature. My side is firmer too. I'm bulky. She's petite. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:25:23 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I’d like to create a system in which 2 separate beds/mattresses are on rails or tracks. The mattresses can be pushed together for doing the sex, then when it’s time to sleep I can shove off. That sounds like a hooker 
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:29:30 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: In the history of monogamy, there have been zero healthy relationships that involve sleeping on separate furniture, let alone in separate rooms. Ward and June Cleaver would disagree. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:31:29 PM EDT
[#25]
Sometimes my 3 year old comes and climbs in bed with us then the wife sleeps in the 3yo's bed.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:31:42 PM EDT
[#26]
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:35:41 PM EDT
[#27]
When I was married we’d sleep in the same bed but often at different times- she worked days and I worked nights.
Now that I’m single I sleep wherever I want- bed, couch, den, guest room, someone else’s house, wherever. When I have company, I sleep in my bed. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:35:42 PM EDT
[#28]
Hard for me to recall, but when we had a king bed - I think there was plenty of room for the 2 of us, and 2 medium sized dogs. Add to that, I was away at work about 3-4 nights a week. But it lacked all inclemency - you simply never got close to touching while laying in bed - so we downsized to a queen. Net effect, the dogs got kicked out of the bed, but no real increase in intimacy. When I started getting Covid symptoms, I moved to the far side of the house. It had a full sized bed. My wife stopped cleaning the top of the queen (it became a giant laundry pile) and she followed me to the full sized bed. But the surprising thing, I don't have nearly as bad of allergies in that bedroom (it is off limits to cats and laundry). My snoring when away. Hers started. Physically there is no room for a dog on the bed - unless one of us is out of town.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:42:21 PM EDT
[#29]
Weird being so rigid to not see both sides.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:42:40 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted: In the history of monogamy, there have been zero healthy relationships that involve sleeping on separate furniture, let alone in separate rooms. This is a fucking dumb and untrue statement. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:44:17 PM EDT
[#31]
I just got married, so not coming from experience, but neither me nor mine are going to be sleeping on the couch. We love our bed.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:52:30 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I just got married, so not coming from experience, but neither me nor mine are going to be sleeping on the couch. We love our bed. Not saying they will for you, but things change. My wife and I slept on a twin mattress for the first year we lived together, and I am not a small guy. It was the most normal thing in the world at the time. Upgrading to a full seemed positively decadent. 35 years later, our relationship is apparently unhealthy because we're not in the same bed every night, LOL. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 2:59:31 PM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Been married 32 years. We’ve slept in separate beds and rooms for over 20 years. Don’t have to listen to each other’s snoring, temperature preference, TV on or off, etc. We don’t love each other any less, we just preferred to SLEEP differently. Same here and pure survival. She runs an ED at night and I supervise psych units opposite her schedule. Separate rooms it is. And I still tiptoe... |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:00:05 PM EDT
[#34]
We have twin beds right next to each other that they look like a king. We both have adjustable beds but she prefers to lay flat and I usually have my head elevated for comfort.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:07:21 PM EDT
[#35]
We sleep together, twisted up like a pretzel.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:16:34 PM EDT
[#36]
We KNEW we were going to sleep in different bedrooms when we retired. Our retirement place was built with that in mind. She's a night owl and I'm up at 4:30 every day. Her wing has a fireplace and my wing has the swimming pool. Married 47 years and it works for us. When it thunders she'l slip in bed with me. When it rains I'll make the trip. It's damn near 40 yards.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:17:09 PM EDT
[#37]
We always start in the same bed together.
If I'm snoring, she may move to the guest room If it's one of those insomiatic nights, I'll go to another room to let her sleep. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:17:53 PM EDT
[#38]
Uh no.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:22:33 PM EDT
[#39]
My grandparents had multiple homes and separate rooms to sleep in every one of those homes. It never seemed to affect their marriage at all.
My wife and I sleep in the same bed (30+ years now) but I suspect the actual quality of sleep might improve if we had separate sleeping rooms. She snores. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 3:42:42 PM EDT
[#40]
We sleep together. Most times there’s a dog up there with us.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 4:41:36 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I also highly suggest box fans for you light sleepers. ... my brain couldn't NOT focus on how quiet it was... I often set my TV sleep timer to one hour, then put it on Pandora. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 4:45:38 PM EDT
[#42]
Also;
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Posted: 4/15/2023 4:46:15 PM EDT
[#43]
Quoted: In the history of monogamy, there have been zero healthy relationships that involve sleeping on separate furniture, let alone in separate rooms. Quoted: Been married 32 years. We’ve slept in separate beds and rooms for over 20 years. Don’t have to listen to each other’s snoring, temperature preference, TV on or off, etc. We don’t love each other any less, we just preferred to SLEEP differently. There goes that theory. 
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Posted: 4/15/2023 4:53:37 PM EDT
[#44]
Time for you to buy a king size bed. Don't sleep separate. It matters. Unless one of you snores super loud and it keeps the other one from sleeping. That's about the only valid reason to risk it.
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Posted: 4/15/2023 5:14:55 PM EDT
[#45]
If you sleep in a king size bed, you do.
Prove me wrong. ;-) |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 5:28:13 PM EDT
[#46]
Yes
She reads all night. I fall asleep. She clicks off her light and wham. I am awake. I am better off sleeping in the man cave. Still do the nasty but can’t stand getting woke up. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 8:05:40 PM EDT
[#47]
Sometimes I’ll spend a few weeks in our very comfortable guest room. We have a very happy marriage and communicate very openly and truthfully to each other. She likes to stay up late with the lights on watching shows on her iPad or TV, I like to go to bed early in complete cold and darkness with no noise/light.
No kids yet, hopefully we’ll have our first in 9-12 months. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 8:10:05 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted: https://media.tenor.com/79CdhUDFdlcAAAAC/office-space-no-man.gif I love sleeping next to my wife and I sleep poorly without her next to me. I definitely don’t understand this, in my opinion sharing a bed is part of the intimacy of marriage. If you’re not into that, that’s fine, but I definitely find it bizarre. Wait till she cuts off the sex. You will fell different. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 8:11:48 PM EDT
[#49]
@mudgunner1 my wife and I have slept in separate beds since we were dating. We are both light sleepers and I have a weird schedule with my job.
We’ve been together 11 years now, married for six and have a 3 year old. Sex still happens multiple times a week as long as the rid isn’t happening. We built our master bedroom big enough for two queen beds. We love it, it’s been great for our marriage and our sex life. Sex happens more often when your spouse is well rested.  Who cares what other people think. If it’s good for your marriage, it doesn’t matter. It is good for ours. |
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Posted: 4/15/2023 8:33:31 PM EDT
[#50]
HELL NO!
Been married for 46 years in June. We still snuggle up close/tight when we go to bed. We use right at half that queen sized bed. She's sort of in the middle and I'm on one side. Nothing like being able to reach over in the dark and feel that smooth soft skin. I rub, feel, squeeze because I like the way it feels. When I 'm done she still thanks me, after all these years. Then I tell her I don't don't do it for her, I do it because I like the way she feels. It would be miserable to sleep in separate beds. She's in the tub now. When she gets out she'll come over on my side of the couch and we'll snuggle up right here till it's time to go to bed in two or three hours. Something wrong somewhere if you don't enjoy snuggling/rubbing. |
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