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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:22:23 PM EDT
[Last Edit: DrKlahn]
When I was 4 to 5 years old, and saw my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could.
Don’t know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. |
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OK, USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:24:56 PM EDT
[#1]
Eddie Murphy "Delirious".
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:25:18 PM EDT
[#2]
Originally Posted By DrKlahn: When I was 4 to 5 years old, and so my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could. Don't know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. 
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:30:59 PM EDT
[#3]
Originally Posted By DrKlahn: When I was 4 to 5 years old, and saw my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could. Don’t know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. That explains Gen-Z. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:35:32 PM EDT
[Last Edit: DrKlahn]
[#4]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Sartorius: Always? If I'd have done that once, Dad would've said, "Don't you ever do that again." If it happened again, you'd have needed a spatula to peel me off the wall afterwards. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Sartorius: Originally Posted By DrKlahn: When I was 4 to 5 years old, and so my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could. Don't know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. Well it was a re-adjustment period to living with him again if you must pry. …. By 4 I already lived with parents, then grandparents, then mom, and finally with my Dad. |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:39:32 PM EDT
[#5]
By all accounts i was a really nice, kind kid.
But, we had a tire swing out front that didn't have a swivel. I got flung off and barfed after winding it up for half an hour and jumping on. After that, I became a devious little asshole tricking, daring, or bribing people to take that ride. My kill count included cousins, a sister, and a babysitter. I got the belt for a few of those victims, but they weren't the last. Looking back I guess my dad didn't hate it too much, or he'd have installed a swivel. The tire swing he put up at their house for the grandkids has a swivel. |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:44:50 PM EDT
[Last Edit: JarheadPatriot]
[#6]
Farts. Farting on someone's head. Or on their pillow. Or while their mouth was open.
An SBV in church or class was always hilarious. It was especially hard to keep a straight face until several others reaped the reward as well. |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:50:31 PM EDT
[#7]
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AZ, USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 10:51:11 PM EDT
[#8]
Obvious and mundane but masterful farts. My Mother hated it, I mean with a passion. She once told me the story, when I was a young adult, about a doctor who delivered many babies in our small community and was very well respected but he cracked a big one in church one day and that was what he was remembered by. I looked at her and said so all I need to do to be remembered is crack a big one in church. Never heard the end of that one
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:01:12 PM EDT
[#9]
Farting at the dinner table
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:02:49 PM EDT
[#10]
You mean, besides setting things on fire?
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TX, USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:15:32 PM EDT
[#11]
Garbage pail kids, my mother hated them. Was always pissed when she found my contraband.
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:16:39 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By speedy66: Obvious and mundane but masterful farts. My Mother hated it, I mean with a passion. She once told me the story, when I was a young adult, about a doctor who delivered many babies in our small community and was very well respected but he cracked a big one in church one day and that was what he was remembered by. I looked at her and said so all I need to do to be remembered is crack a big one in church. Never heard the end of that one A good one let loose sitting on a wooden pew is a work of art . 
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VA, USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:17:18 PM EDT
[#13]
Fart at the dinner table.
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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:24:59 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryYou really have no understanding how true this is. I literally grew Watching the Three Stooges with all of my family. Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk!!’ |
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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:27:17 PM EDT
[Last Edit: DrKlahn]
[#15]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By speedy66: Obvious and mundane but masterful farts. My Mother hated it, I mean with a passion. She once told me the story, when I was a young adult, about a doctor who delivered many babies in our small community and was very well respected but he cracked a big one in church one day and that was what he was remembered by. I looked at her and said so all I need to do to be remembered is crack a big one in church. Never heard the end of that one First time I saw snow is about 5 1/2 years old in Chattanooga, Tennessee and I asked my grandmother was that cocaine. She never let me live that down either, or all my cousins who were there. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:30:02 PM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By HDSledge: That explains Gen-Z. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By HDSledge: Originally Posted By DrKlahn: When I was 4 to 5 years old, and saw my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could. Don’t know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. That explains Gen-Z. They lack testicular fortitude? |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:30:07 PM EDT
[#17]
I had some of the loudest farts as a kid.
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:31:22 PM EDT
[#18]
We would fake injuries - ketchup was a good prop. Or play dead. The more upset they got, the funnier it was.
I got my ass whooped for real a few times because of that. In retrospect, we gave our parents heart pains often 
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USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:33:34 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By tveddy: I had some of the loudest farts as a kid. Cap’n Gordon’s fish sticks am i right ? |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:34:07 PM EDT
[#20]
Fart jokes
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PA, USA
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:37:14 PM EDT
[Last Edit: OTHP]
[#21]
Talking someone into holding the spark plug wire on my dirtbike while I gave it a good solid kick over.
Never got old. ETA: gen X also
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:49:59 PM EDT
[#22]
As a 10 year old, crossing the yellow line on the flight line .
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:50:56 PM EDT
[#23]
Bebe’s kids.
WE DON’T DIE, WE MULTIPLY!!! |
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Posted: 5/8/2024 11:54:36 PM EDT
[#24]
Turning on the wipers, radio, reversing the temp on the HVAC, etc while we were sitting in the car with the ignition off. Parent would come back and turn the car on to have everything running full blast.
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Posted: 5/9/2024 12:00:59 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 56xdx_Z]
[#25]
Hiding stuff. My dad had some maps from work and I hid them so well they had sifted through the trash outside looking for them, before fessing up
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Posted: 5/9/2024 12:16:02 AM EDT
[#26]
I recommended "Blazing Saddles" |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 12:27:10 AM EDT
[#27]
I liked 79-87ish SNL and all things Steve Martin.
My folks thought it was shitty lowbrow stuff. They were probably right, but it was still glorious. |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 2:32:54 AM EDT
[#28]
10 years old, me and my idiot friends had memorized WORD FOR WORD Frank Zappa mothers of Invention, and Cheech and Chong Big Bambu albums.
We'd recite the entire albums WORD FOR WORD, repeatedly. |
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USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 3:17:47 AM EDT
[#29]
As a kid you're at belly height to adults.
Every time I'd hear a stomach growl or gurgle, I'd look at them and loudly ask, "Bowel movement?" 😂 I finally stopped after a very stern talking to and explanation of what I was saying. |
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NY, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 3:20:13 AM EDT
[#30]
Married With Children.
My mother HATED that show. |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 3:34:30 AM EDT
[#31]
When I was three, I thought Superman was a flying clown. My mother didn't understand.
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Posted: 5/9/2024 3:56:58 AM EDT
[Last Edit: SuperStormBryan]
[#32]
Ah man, I was a pretty square kids, but my kids!
For a few months after taking him camping for the first time, my two year old would shout "pee-pee in the bushes!" everywhere. We had been primitive camping in a state park, hiked out in the rain, and went to breakfast with my family that lived a half hour away from the park. He wouldn't shut up about "pee-pee in the bushes!" while everyone was eating. Same kid. For a good while when we went to HEB, he'd grab cans of beans, and hold them up and shout "BEEEEANS!" while walking through the store. The oldest kid, he LOVES hiding behind doors a jump scaring Momma. So do I, but that's different. They all think lighting stuff on fire in this old grill is just a riot. Dog torment. My second oldest thinks its hilarious to knock on the front door and get the dog all worked up. lol "Pee-pee in the bushes" kid loves to bark at the dog, and get her all worked up, until the dog has had enough and barks him into a corner, then he hollers for Momma and starts barking at the dog again while she breaks them up! Boy gets his Momma and the dog ends up running to me for attention. Some sort of weird game the two of them have figured out. I tell him, she a 13 pound wiener dog, just walk over her, lol. My girl thinks its funny to throw cheese at the dog, with the aim to hit her in the face with cheese, and shriek with laughter the whole time. Surprisingly, dog will play that game all day. The dog puts up with a lot, but she has it pretty good. |
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MD, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 6:58:48 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By 9mmmac: Fart at the dinner table. I preferred ripping an SBD in the car, during the winter. I'd be in the back trying to stifle a massive laugh, and my father would say: "Looks like we've got a pig in the car". And I'd laugh even harder. Hell, I'm laughing now, just remembering it. 
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KY, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:18:11 AM EDT
[#34]
Cutting the phone cord with scissors while mom is on the phone. Back when house phones were on the wall with a 30ft cord
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:35:09 AM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By TexCorriente: By all accounts i was a really nice, kind kid. But, we had a tire swing out front that didn't have a swivel. I got flung off and barfed after winding it up for half an hour and jumping on. After that, I became a devious little asshole tricking, daring, or bribing people to take that ride. My kill count included cousins, a sister, and a babysitter. I got the belt for a few of those victims, but they weren't the last. Looking back I guess my dad didn't hate it too much, or he'd have installed a swivel. The tire swing he put up at their house for the grandkids has a swivel. Swivel? Fuck that. Best tire swings double as centrifuges! Spin that thing up! |
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MO, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:39:59 AM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By larkinmusic: Eddie Murphy "Delirious". This |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:40:59 AM EDT
[#37]
Monty Python
My Dad thought they were retards and the humor was idiotic at best. He watched it with me sometimes and he was bewildered as to how I thought alot of it was hilarious. He used to laugh at ME laughing at these morons. Untill he saw a 5 second "cut in skit" (the one where the guy was blowing up a balloon with big excessive breaths whereupon on the 5th breath the balloon deflated and the guy swelled up and floated away) and I swear we both belly laughed untill we couldnt breathe. Sadly, it's the very last time I remember REALLY laughing with him as he was fighting a losing battle with lung cancer at the time...... |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:45:10 AM EDT
[#38]
“Save big money at MY NARDS!”
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MD, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 7:51:55 AM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By larkinmusic: Eddie Murphy "Delirious". 100%. Listened to it for the first time in an album. That’s how old it was. Would never survive the cancel culture today. |
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MI, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:02:22 AM EDT
[#40]
My mother hated that slime, couldnt play with it inside, get it on the carpet. Plus I would always make two big green boobs with it. She was always a speech therapist, so I would always talk like sylvester the cat with his speech problems.
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:08:12 AM EDT
[#41]
overheard in a random grocery store
lady pushing cart with baby in baby seat ...elementary school age child walking beside cart Baby in baby seat, not even talking clearly yet, breaks into singing Kid Rock word-for-word Said the boogie, said up drop the boogie Bawitdaba, da-bang, da-bang, diggy-diggy-diggy Said the boogie, said up jump the boogie Mom says, "that's it...you're getting a spanking as soon as we get home...you can think about that all the way home!" (kid walking next to cart) screams "I DIDN'T SAY IT! THE BABY SAID IT! THAT'S NOT FAIR, WAAAH!!!" Mom say, "I told you not to teach her to say that, but you did it anyway. Now, whenever she says it YOU get the spanking. That's fair!" |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:40:30 AM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By DrKlahn: You really have no understanding how true this is. I literally grew Watching the Three Stooges with all of my family. Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk!!’ Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By DrKlahn: You really have no understanding how true this is. I literally grew Watching the Three Stooges with all of my family. Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk!!’ The Three Stooges will never stop being funny 
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Posted: 5/9/2024 9:24:47 AM EDT
[#43]
The phrase, “Holy Garbonzo Beans!”
Dad hated that and I over used it. To put a stop to it I had to eat Garbonzo beans for a week. I stopped using it after day 2 but the punishment had to run its course. I hate beans of all types… |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 9:30:38 AM EDT
[#44]
Got tired of sharing a room so I threw all my sister's stuff out the 2nd story window.
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CO, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 9:45:27 AM EDT
[#45]
In the days before seat belts as a back seat kid, I thought it was hilarious to grab dads ears while he was driving and twist his head left and right while telling him “left turn” “right turn”!
Dad was not amused, mom however laughed her ass off! |
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Posted: 5/9/2024 9:55:09 AM EDT
[#46]
My brothers and I would make up sayings and words and repeat them over and over to each other.
My mother would get so annoyed because we were speaking gibberish. |
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AR, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 10:00:37 AM EDT
[#47]
Rip a big fart under the sheet then yell at my mom to come give a night hug, then whip the sheet right as she was at my bed.
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:18:43 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By tac556: Swivel? Fuck that. Best tire swings double as centrifuges! Spin that thing up! Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By tac556: Originally Posted By TexCorriente: By all accounts i was a really nice, kind kid. But, we had a tire swing out front that didn't have a swivel. I got flung off and barfed after winding it up for half an hour and jumping on. After that, I became a devious little asshole tricking, daring, or bribing people to take that ride. My kill count included cousins, a sister, and a babysitter. I got the belt for a few of those victims, but they weren't the last. Looking back I guess my dad didn't hate it too much, or he'd have installed a swivel. The tire swing he put up at their house for the grandkids has a swivel. Swivel? Fuck that. Best tire swings double as centrifuges! Spin that thing up! It ain't a real tire swing if you don't white out!!!! |
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USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:29:14 PM EDT
[#49]
Originally Posted By DrKlahn: When I was 4 to 5 years old, and saw my dad in the hallway, I would always punch him in the nuts as hard as I could. Don’t know why, but I thought it was the funniest thing in the world. Until the beatings made it not so fun anymore. Gen-x if it matters. Did dad drop on your head as an infant? |
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NV, USA
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Posted: 5/9/2024 8:32:49 PM EDT
[#50]
Said the f word when I was trying to say truck.
Saying ur anus when talking about the planet |
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