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User Panel
User Panel
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:20:06 PM EST
[#1]
Whats the embarassing part?
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:21:33 PM EST
[#2]
I’m single begmcause my dick is so big I might hurt someone.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:22:09 PM EST
[#3]
Ice Age movies is your embarrassing confession? Not to be a jerk but you know how I know you don’t drink?
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:26:35 PM EST
[#4]
I'm a 55 year old Straight Married white Male and I luvs me some PEE-WEE Herman movies.
I can do that as a [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference] "Confident Heterosexual" [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference]. 
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:27:37 PM EST
[#5]
I can't poop with the bathroom door open, even if I'm home alone.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:30:23 PM EST
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Ice Age movies is your embarrassing confession? Not to be a jerk but you know how I know you don’t drink? |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:30:46 PM EST
[#7]
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out!
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:33:18 PM EST
[#8]
I've cried during nearly every animated movie ever made.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:34:06 PM EST
[#9]
Quoted: I can easily drink a fifth a night. Not that I'm proud of that. 
No kids and LILO and Stitch is one of my favorite movies of all time. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:34:29 PM EST
[#10]
I banged 3 sisters last night, and then their mom.
Lord, I apologize for that one. 
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:34:41 PM EST
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out! |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:34:48 PM EST
[#12]
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:35:01 PM EST
[#13]
I like the soundtrack to Hamilton
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:35:45 PM EST
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
That can't be the worst thing you ever did. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out!
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:36:25 PM EST
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I can't poop with the bathroom door open, even if I'm home alone. We've seen your webcam. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:36:36 PM EST
[#16]
I snorted coke off a whore's ass once.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:38:21 PM EST
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I banged 3 sisters last night, and then their mom. Lord, I apologize for that one. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:38:23 PM EST
[#18]
I sadly voted for John McCain and Mitt Romney
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:38:27 PM EST
[#19]
I let my wife fuck my ass with her dildo but only once. No I did not like it.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:38:38 PM EST
[#20]
I'm considering buying a used $19k beater Toyota Tacoma for my daughter's 16th birthday.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:39:09 PM EST
[#21]
In high school I used to roll fake joints out of plant food and "accidentally" drop them places in classrooms and hallways.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:40:02 PM EST
[#22]
I'm on my fourth episode of Grey's Anatomy today.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:41:29 PM EST
[#23]
Quote History |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:43:23 PM EST
[#24]
I was gonna say something funny but it's just too easy..
How about, I was a jump pilot for 8 months and was offered free skydiving lessons but I didn't do it because it scared the shit out of me I've heard stories man
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:43:54 PM EST
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I snorted coke off a whore's ass once. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:43:57 PM EST
[#26]
I'm 28 and still a virgin.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:45:08 PM EST
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm a 55 year old Straight Married white Male and I luvs me some PEE-WEE Herman movies. I can do that as a [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference] "Confident Heterosexual" [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference].  Attached File |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:45:33 PM EST
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm a 55 year old Straight Married white Male and I luvs me some PEE-WEE Herman movies. I can do that as a [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference] "Confident Heterosexual" [Rustlers' Rhapsody Reference]. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:45:39 PM EST
[#29]
I’ve had two full time jobs in my life and technically, I been walked off both of them.
First one fired, but state deemed it wrongful termination. Second/Current one was plant closure.... At 27, that’s kinda embarrassing. But at the same time, I get a certain amount of pride that despite a disability, I always managed to make a living. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:45:41 PM EST
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I banged 3 sisters last night, and then their mom. Lord, I apologize for that one. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:46:16 PM EST
[#31]
I thought wonderwall was a pretty good song.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:46:55 PM EST
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I've cried during nearly every animated movie ever made. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:47:50 PM EST
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I thought wonderwall was a pretty good song. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:48:19 PM EST
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I’m single begmcause my dick is so big I might hurt someone. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:48:47 PM EST
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
https://i.imgur.com/Z94DpSD.png |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:50:15 PM EST
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I let my wife fuck my ass with her dildo but only once. No I did not like it.  Attached File |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:51:24 PM EST
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
It's true. The first Arfcockalypse was actually a fellow arfcommer trying desperately to compensate for his shortcoming after he saw the panoramic photo of IWK's phallus. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
I’m single begmcause my dick is so big I might hurt someone. 
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:51:28 PM EST
[#38]
 I voted for Bill Clinton the first time he ran. I was young and dumb.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:51:39 PM EST
[#39]
I once listened to a Nickelback song start to finish.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:51:51 PM EST
[#40]
I go to a 12-step program for alcoholics and addicts on a weekly basis.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:52:24 PM EST
[#41]
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:52:28 PM EST
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Those poor dogs...
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:52:54 PM EST
[#43]
Holy dick and balls batman! A double tap!
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:53:09 PM EST
[#44]
I like the series "Riverdale".
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:53:48 PM EST
[#45]
Last time my wife was out of town I watched Moana on Netflix while a hedgehog slept on my stomach.
Damn good movie. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:56:08 PM EST
[#46]
I’d like to sleep with my coworker. I know it’s wrong (and a common thought) and nothing will ever happen but I still feel bad.
Yes, it’s a female coworker. Assclowns |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:56:47 PM EST
[#47]
ITT, we learn who's been screwing goats?
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:57:27 PM EST
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it. |
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Posted: 7/18/2018 9:58:15 PM EST
[#49]
I threw a glass ashtray at a guy for staring at me when I was 13 or so at a taco bell. After it hit him in the face his companion yelled why did I do that to a blind guy. My cousin and I legged it outta there.
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Posted: 7/18/2018 10:02:32 PM EST
[#50]
I love my "apartment".... At least it isn't mom's basement, finally
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