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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:51:37 PM EDT
[#1]
I second this.
My father passed in 2006, but I cherish all the time I got to spend with him. ETA: Isn't 'funny' how every son or daughter at one age decides Dad is fucked and doesn't know what's really going on, then at a later age realizes he actually knew more than you guessed, except you were to stubborn to listen? |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:51:40 PM EDT
[#2]
Truth.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:54:26 PM EDT
[#3]
Never met my father....
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:54:48 PM EDT
[#4]
Yeah, I'd agree.
Mine passed in 2013, and I haven't had him around in the times I've needed him, leaving me to figure things out myself. Take advantage of it if yours is still around. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:55:11 PM EDT
[#5]
Agreed. Lost my father in 2008 at age 24, kills me that I can't just call him.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:56:14 PM EDT
[#6]
Mine never had the inclination to spend time with me when I was growing up. I made sure to spend as much time with my kids as possible as they were growing up. They'll have the kind of memories that I don't.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:57:22 PM EDT
[#7]
My dad lives 15 minutes away. I see him maybe 3 or 4 times a year. I'd wager he couldn't remember my birthday, nor do I know his.
He's a paranoid baby boomer. My whole life growing up he was worried about the government taking over and the NWO. Then he discovered the internet and his big idea last year, that he was pretty sure he came up with, was to go to the US/Mexico border and blog about it. Then he was worried about antifa and ms13 working together. Now he's currently concerned about Muslims implementing Sharia law nation wide. Last Wednesday we did meet up for dinner. We (my brother and I) assumed it was because he wanted money for something. Bingo. Wanted to see if we could help pay the taxes on the land he bought 20 years ago...then told us about the new upper he just built 
ETA: The church still gets their money though. I told him to sell the land. I'm over it. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:58:15 PM EDT
[#8]
My dad hung up on me in 2006. No contact since.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 9:59:25 PM EDT
[#9]
Amen. My dad moved away suddenly and then I only saw him once in 14 years. Then, a year later I got the call while on deployment. Gone.
I still remember our last day hunting rabbits and fowl together. It was an amazing day. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:00:02 PM EDT
[#10]
Can't, pancreatic cancer sucks.
I go talk, but it's a one way conversation now. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:00:08 PM EDT
[#11]
I called my dad and its all water under the bridge.
 I miss him alot. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:00:20 PM EDT
[#12]
I lost my dad in January and my step dad in May.
It hasn't been easy, really missing them. Trying to cherish time spent with my 10 yr old son. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:02:04 PM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
ETA: Isn't 'funny' how every son or daughter at one age decides Dad is fucked and doesn't know what's really going on, then at a later age realizes he actually knew more than you guessed, except you were to stubborn to listen? |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:02:39 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Never met my father.... |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:02:40 PM EDT
[#15]
My dad is 93 in a few weeks. Going to see him.
Yeah, sorta the same deal. When I was young he was either too busy working or too busy making sure I didn’t screw up any worse. That all changed when he knew he’d done his job. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:03:31 PM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I second this. My father passed in 2006, but I cherish all the time I got to spend with him. ETA: Isn't 'funny' how every son or daughter at one age decides Dad is fucked and doesn't know what's really going on, then at a later age realizes he actually knew more than you guessed, except you were to stubborn to listen?  For those that still have the opportunity, tell your parents how you feel.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:04:27 PM EDT
[#17]
Agree. My dad and I have recently taken up golf. We both suck and have no idea what we are doing...it’s quite hilarious. However it’s a great opportunity to spend half a day hanging out outside.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:04:41 PM EDT
[#18]
My father was retired USAF, then we moved to Florida. He worked ANOTHER 20 years and was going to retire. We had a RE brokerage set up and were going to leverage family lands into real estate projects in North Fla. We did have a lot of good times hunting and fishing in Fla. and on the farm in Ga, but always could have been more. Sadly in his later yrs (my late teens and early 20s) I was "distracted" but plans still went forward. Sadly 5 months after his second retirement he passed away. RE brokerage plans went by the wayside, life went on.
Arfcom, unless there are irreconciliable differences between you and your family, spend all the time you can with your family. I am estranged from my middle brother for a number of reasons which won't change. I have tried yet he's got no interest due a perceived slight from Mom many yrs ago which he KNOWS is not true. So be it, his bed. Oldest brother OD'd in 94. Dumb fucker. Thankfully my Mom is still alive and kickin' at 89. We are close. See each other a couple times a month (Austin/Dallas). I will miss her beyond belief when the time comes. Am eternally grateful that she is still with us. My two cents worth............if you have family and get along.....please make time to spend it with family. You won't regret it. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:05:44 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My dad is 93 in a few weeks. Going to see him. Yeah, sorta the same deal. When I was young he was either too busy working or too busy making sure I didn’t screw up any worse. That all changed when he knew he’d done his job. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:05:51 PM EDT
[#20]
Once a month I visit his grave.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:06:19 PM EDT
[#21]
Agreed.
Me and Dad came to the US together in 1995 to pave the way for the family. Got to experience a new world together. Talk about a bonding experience! We still laugh about it today. We were so clueless. Pumping "petrol" yourself? no way! WTF is miracle whip - oh yeah, it doesn't go on bagles - whatever those are. We thought they were doughnuts. Spend time with your dad, even if he annoys the piss out of you sometimes. You will not regret it. Most of my regrets are not spending more time with those that have left... |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:06:46 PM EDT
[#22]
I concur. I'm fortunate to spend just about every day with mine working. My grandfather died at 70 or so and my dad was only in his 30s. I realize that every day is a gift. I am doing my best to pass that same on to my son hopefully as he grows he feels the same.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:06:48 PM EDT
[#23]
Eh. He criticizes or belittles everything I do. That has the effect of not wanting to share my life with him. Why? When he's just going to crap all over it.
But I stay in touch for holidays, Father's Day and his birthday. Ten Commandments and all that. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:06:50 PM EDT
[#24]
Havent heard from him since 1996.
No cares |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:07:14 PM EDT
[#25]
Man, I could go on for hours about my father. I see him every day now. We've had a good relationship but in my 20s as well, I was busy partying with my friends and missed out on a lot of his good years.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:07:59 PM EDT
[#26]
Sending my dad a text telling him I love him now.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:08:21 PM EDT
[#27]
YEP, WWII Navy Vet. Dead now 43 years!
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:08:48 PM EDT
[#28]
My Dad was a tradesman, an electrician.
I grew up plumbing, dry walling, painting, roofing ,you name it. When I was about 12, I realized there were people you could pay t,o do those jobs. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:11:27 PM EDT
[#29]
Good reminder.
Same goes for grandparents, siblings or anyone you are close to. Once they're gone, they are gone. I should go shooting with my Dad in the morning. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:13:06 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Eh. He criticizes or belittles everything I do. That has the effect of not wanting to share my life with him. My father-in-law passed earlier this year, he was a good man. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:13:25 PM EDT
[#31]
Quoted:
I see my old man maybe twice a week. We were never really super super close growing up. He was working a lot and came home tired often. Today he drove an hour and a half with me to Cape Cod to help pickup my new used truck. I should really be excited for the truck, but what was even better was able to spend three hours round trip with him shooting the shit, talking politics, him telling me everywhere he went in Cape Cod as a kid and just some overall good stories from him. Im 32 and he's 71. I wish I spent more time with him in my 20s instead of going out with my friends and such. I grew up in MD. Moved to Iowa when I was 20. Up until I was 31 or so I never saw my parents and only talked to my mother. Still only see my parents 3 times a year if I am lucky. My father was diagnosed with quick onset Parkinson's about 5 years ago. I now cherish every moment I get to spend with him. The decline in 5 years is astonishing and sad He is 74.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:13:31 PM EDT
[#32]
I agree 100% with you OP.
My father passed in 2005 from cancer, FUCK CANCER. I was 25 at the time. Growing up he was around more than some other dads. As a teenager we butted heads most of the time from 13 -19. He always wanted the best for me, and from me. He sent a vast amount of time, trying to teach me about life. From auto mechanics to cooking to how to live life and learn from his mistakes. I'm 39 now and still think about lessons that he taught me and even have moments that I figure out what he was trying to teach me. I feel that I would have more to talk about with him now then I did in my teens and 20's. I miss him everyday and would love to spend just 10 more minuted with him. It would be an awesome to have discuss life with him as I matured. So yes spend time with your father, call him if up. One day he won't be there. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:15:11 PM EDT
[#33]
My dad is 98. He doesn’t know who I am most of the time. I am 70. My son is dead. You never know what’s gonna happen. Love your family.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:17:09 PM EDT
[#34]
My Dad and I wear very close. When Mom passed in 98 we moved my Dad in with us.
Dad passed in 2012 at the ripe age of 97. He had been in the hospital to have his right leg removed at the knee. The main arteries wear shutting down. He came down with phenomena and passed threes days later I wish I could take to my Father. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:17:56 PM EDT
[#35]
Lost mine at 17 to lung cancer. That was 22 years ago. Not a day goes by that i don’t wonder what my life would have looked like if he was still here.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:18:25 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Sending my dad a text telling him I love him now. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:18:45 PM EDT
[#37]
I became close to my dad after both of my grandpas croaked.
I still miss both of them very much. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:19:10 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Never met my father.... ETA: and I offered after the hard part had passed... |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:20:58 PM EDT
[#39]
I do hang out with him, love and appreciate him and enjoy talking and spending time. For a guy who didn't even want kids, he's a great Dad.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:23:46 PM EDT
[#40]
I do it every weekend
Will continue to do so until the end of his time... No regrets here at all... |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:24:02 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My dad hung up on me in 2006. No contact since. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:24:17 PM EDT
[#42]
My Dad was a career soldier... we didn't get to spend much time together when I was young, but we've made up for it since then. We chat 4 - 5 times per week.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:24:35 PM EDT
[#43]
My dad turned into a recluse and shut us all out after him and mom divorced. I maybe talk to him for 10-15 minutes a year and he’s always in a hurry to get off the phone. Sucks but I gave up trying to change that a long time ago.
Truth be told I have my doubts that he’s even my biological father and I suspect he does as well. Regardless he’s the man who raised me so that’s all that matters. I just wish he’d move on with life and get over the divorce. My entire family is a dumpster fire as a result of my grandfather. I hope they stoked the fires of hell extra hot for him. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:27:26 PM EDT
[#44]
I lost my dad last year to dementia (he was 84) that came on pretty slowly ...maybe 10 years? But those were the best 10 years in many ways because we spent lots of great time doing things together. And had lots of long talks. In his case he was fully aware it was happening (dementia) until the end and wanted to live it to the best he could and he was otherwise in pretty decent health (not otherwise handicapped) so we did lots of active things and went places together like buying trucks or tractors, fishing, building barns etc, grocery or clothes shopping etc
So I totally agree with you OP that that time is precious and you should use as much of it as you can. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:27:44 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My dad lives 15 minutes away. I see him maybe 3 or 4 times a year. I'd wager he couldn't remember my birthday, nor do I know his. He's a paranoid baby boomer. My whole life growing up he was worried about the government taking over and the NWO. Then he discovered the internet and his big idea last year, that he was pretty sure he came up with, was to go to the US/Mexico border and blog about it. Then he was worried about antifa and ms13 working together. Now he's currently concerned about Muslims implementing Sharia law nation wide. Last Wednesday we did meet up for dinner. We (my brother and I) assumed it was because he wanted money for something. Bingo. Wanted to see if we could help pay the taxes on the land he bought 20 years ago...then told us about the new upper he just built
ETA: The church still gets their money though. I told him to sell the land. I'm over it. 
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:30:00 PM EDT
[#46]
My Dad passed away in 2014. I wish I could call him.
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:33:38 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
What's his screen name? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
My dad lives 15 minutes away. I see him maybe 3 or 4 times a year. I'd wager he couldn't remember my birthday, nor do I know his. He's a paranoid baby boomer. My whole life growing up he was worried about the government taking over and the NWO. Then he discovered the internet and his big idea last year, that he was pretty sure he came up with, was to go to the US/Mexico border and blog about it. Then he was worried about antifa and ms13 working together. Now he's currently concerned about Muslims implementing Sharia law nation wide. Last Wednesday we did meet up for dinner. We (my brother and I) assumed it was because he wanted money for something. Bingo. Wanted to see if we could help pay the taxes on the land he bought 20 years ago...then told us about the new upper he just built
ETA: The church still gets their money though. I told him to sell the land. I'm over it. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:34:04 PM EDT
[#48]
Amen
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:37:54 PM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Mine never had the inclination to spend time with me when I was growing up. I made sure to spend as much time with my kids as possible as they were growing up. They'll have the kind of memories that I don't. |
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Posted: 7/26/2019 10:39:45 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Eh. He criticizes or belittles everything I do. That has the effect of not wanting to share my life with him. Why? When he's just going to crap all over it. But I stay in touch for holidays, Father's Day and his birthday. Ten Commandments and all that. |
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