User Panel
User Panel
User Panel
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 2:54:32 PM EDT
This commercial just popped on my TV.
 Failed To Load Title I laughed. Peddling "cowboy seltzer".  Knew a bunch of real ranch folk in Texas and other western states. These "working" cowpokes in the commercial...prefectly groomed two day beards, clothes are crisp and new, hats with no sweat ring stains. The guy working the tee post driver will be there three days in that caleche dirt, driving it like a pussy. Bet director call to that guy was: "Brucey, I know it like hard, but you need to at least act butch to get through this shot!" I'd lay odds "Lone River" brand is a fresh Cali transplant (Austin region) that decided to sell something "cowboy" in these new digs. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 2:57:25 PM EDT
[#1]
my wife likes it better than most
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 2:57:27 PM EDT
[#2]
Quoted: This commercial just popped on my TV.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99x5FFyqZtkI laughed. Peddling "cowboy seltzer". Knew a bunch of real ranch folk in Texas and other western states. These "working" cowpokes in the commercial...prefectly groomed two day beards, clothes are crisp and new, hats with no sweat ring stains. The guy working the tee post driver will be there three days in that caleche dirt, driving it like a pussy. Bet director call to that guy was: "Brucey, I know it like hard, but you need to at least act butch to get through this shot!" I'd lay odds "Lone River" brand is a fresh Cali transplant (Austin region) that decided to sell something "cowboy" in these new digs. Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 2:58:28 PM EDT
[#3]
That was gayer than 3 dicks touching.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:01:16 PM EDT
[#4]
Ram Ranch really rocks.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:01:16 PM EDT
[#5]
Ryan Bingham does pretty good music
 Ryan Bingham 'Wolves' |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:02:09 PM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That was gayer than 3 dicks touching. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:02:39 PM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: This commercial just popped on my TV. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99x5FFyqZtkI laughed. Peddling "cowboy seltzer". Knew a bunch of real ranch folk in Texas and other western states. These "working" cowpokes in the commercial...prefectly groomed two day beards, clothes are crisp and new, hats with no sweat ring stains. The guy working the tee post driver will be there three days in that caleche dirt, driving it like a pussy. Bet director call to that guy was: "Brucey, I know it like hard, but you need to at least act butch to get through this shot!" I'd lay odds "Lone River" brand is a fresh Cali transplant (Austin region) that decided to sell something "cowboy" in these new digs. Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Breaking: advertisers only have a general knowledge of things they don’t do for a living, but still want you to buy their shiny product. More at six. Best option is to stop watching TV OP.  |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:04:13 PM EDT
[#8]
Must be a gay dude ranch because real men drink beer.
Did they all drive their Miata there? |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:04:24 PM EDT
[#9]
Quoted: I'd lay odds "Lone River" brand is a fresh Cali transplant (Austin region) that decided to sell something "cowboy" in these new digs. You'd lose money. Native Midland Texas woman named Katie Beal Brown started the company/beverage. BTW, the ranch water thing is really a west-texas beverage...they're not bullshitting about that, just used mannequin cowboys to sell it. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:04:46 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Cowboys don't dress like that. That's the thing. It's a mostly fictional creation, like the "Chinese restaurants" we have here. One of the guys I used to know in college, born in China but very American, described American "Chinese restaurants" as being the equivalent of an "American restaurant" with western decor, statues of Buddha and Jesus everywhere, and in intermingling of Southern and Long Island accents. These commercials and things like it are pure cosplay. I mean, have you ever ridden a horse or worked on a farm? Are you aware that even a canter will whack your groin like a hammer? Do you think tight jeans are good for working flexibility? How about sweating? Do you think a felt hat is going to be comfortable in desert heat or even high desert sun? Do you have any idea how dirty EVERYTHING gets when you farm? You might have a "dress" hat but you sure as hell don't work in a clean hat. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:06:23 PM EDT
[#11]
That dude is an actor in Yellowstone. (In addition to being a musician).
He was also, apparently, a “bull rider” in his younger years according to Wikipedia I’ll hazard a guess that’s he’s a lot more “cowboy” than most “country” artists out there at the moment. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:06:36 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That was gayer than 3 dicks touching. Gayer than three dudes jerking off five other dudes. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:07:14 PM EDT
[#13]
I was making ranch water (maybe 10 minutes) before it was cool. It’s actually pretty good if you like blanco tequila and is a fantastically refreshing hot weather drink.
Tequila + lime juice + ice + Topo Chico + shake a little Tajin on it |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:07:28 PM EDT
[#14]
Very cosmopolitan
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:08:52 PM EDT
[#15]
First there was Brokeback Mountain. Now this shit. The pussification of the American Cowboy continues.
 If John Wayne was alive.......
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:12:39 PM EDT
[#16]
In Ryan’s defense, he really did live the cowboy life before moving on to music.
I’m sure the check for this commercial was worth it. Probably the easiest work he’s ever done. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:14:50 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted: my wife likes it better than most Likes it "more", not better. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:16:45 PM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Likes it "more", not better. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: my wife likes it better than most Likes it "more", not better. How about “Likes it more betterer than most”? I think I seent that wrote down somewheres before.  |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:20:23 PM EDT
[#19]
I like my water from goats.
Topo Chico ftw. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:21:36 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Good to know. I was getting the vibe that it was for a gay dude ranch, leading to a woke remake of City Slickers. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:21:56 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That dude is an actor in Yellowstone. (In addition to being a musician). He was also, apparently, a “bull rider” in his younger years according to Wikipedia I’ll hazard a guess that’s he’s a lot more “cowboy” than most “country” artists out there at the moment. Probably right. There are a few country artists that can handle the ranch life. I've roped steers with George Strait. He's a real cowboy. I've seen Jewell on horseback. She can ride. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:22:25 PM EDT
[#22]
 Bear Whiz Beer |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:23:21 PM EDT
[#23]
I have inlaws that are real Montana 12k acre cattle farmers. I had that for the first time at their house....
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:25:51 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: First there was Brokeback Mountain. Now this shit. The pussification of the American Cowboy continues. If John Wayne was alive....... If John Wayne was alive, he'd be starring as a trans activist in the latest Nora Ephron comedy. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:26:32 PM EDT
[#25]
Well you can call me what ever you want but that particular brand of ranch water is damn good.
Also Ryan Bingham the "actor" was a bull rider and is a damn good country singer. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:26:49 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I have inlaws that are real Montana 12k acre cattle farmers. I had that for the first time at their house.... 12k acres in Montana. Does your wife have a hot single sister? |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:27:44 PM EDT
[#27]
Maybe if Rip were peddling this shit instead of Walker, non-gays might be interested.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:28:44 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That dude is an actor in Yellowstone. (In addition to being a musician). He was also, apparently, a “bull rider” in his younger years according to Wikipedia I’ll hazard a guess that’s he’s a lot more “cowboy” than most “country” artists out there at the moment. I guess OP of thread does not watch Yellowstone. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:31:46 PM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted: 12k acres in Montana. Does your wife have a hot single sister? She does, but she's on the other side of the in-laws.  Attached File |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:37:03 PM EDT
[#30]
Cowboys drinking white claws out of a non-skinny can doesn't make we want to drink white claws out of a non-skinny can...
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:39:47 PM EDT
[#31]
I drink white tequila and lime
No seltzer |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:41:01 PM EDT
[#32]
Quoted: That was gayer than 3 dicks touching. The only thing "gayer" than that is getting triggered by a commercial 
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:44:44 PM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Nailed it |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:46:07 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Cowboys don't dress like that. That's the thing. It's a mostly fictional creation, like the "Chinese restaurants" we have here. One of the guys I used to know in college, born in China but very American, described American "Chinese restaurants" as being the equivalent of an "American restaurant" with western decor, statues of Buddha and Jesus everywhere, and in intermingling of Southern and Long Island accents. These commercials and things like it are pure cosplay. I mean, have you ever ridden a horse or worked on a farm? Are you aware that even a canter will whack your groin like a hammer? Do you think tight jeans are good for working flexibility? How about sweating? Do you think a felt hat is going to be comfortable in desert heat or even high desert sun? Do you have any idea how dirty EVERYTHING gets when you farm? You might have a "dress" hat but you sure as hell don't work in a clean hat. Um... it's a commercial... not reality... |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:46:50 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Gayer than three dudes jerking off five other dudes. A subject you seem to know an awful lot about
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:46:51 PM EDT
[#36]
A lot of purse swinging over a commercial in here.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:47:43 PM EDT
[#37]
Ranch water? Sounds like something out of a horse trough.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:50:15 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Said the triggered guy. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:54:53 PM EDT
[#39]
We've never owned a t-post driver. We just drive the t-posts in the ground with the front end loader on the tractor. I don't know many people who use their horses for much more than pleasure riding. Most of the time, you just hop in the truck and go check on the cows and wear you're dirtiest baseball cap and a hoodie when it gets cold. Straw hat comes out in July and August if you know you're gonna be in the sun all day.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:55:05 PM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That was gayer than 3 dicks touching. Indeed. Looked like the cast were all rejected from 'Yellowstone" for being too flaming gay. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:59:23 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Said the triggered guy. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. Said the triggered guy. Ok, sweetie. I don’t post advertisements that make my peen wiggle. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 3:59:59 PM EDT
[#42]
When I think of ranch water I think of cows wading into a water hole taking a big drink then peeing and shitting in the water
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:01:50 PM EDT
[#43]
This thread would be so much better if Deej was here for it.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:04:08 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted: When I think of ranch water I think of cows wading into a water hole taking a big drink then peeing and shitting in the water That was my first thought. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:09:52 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Ok, sweetie. I don’t post advertisements that make my peen wiggle. You trying to trigger me with your salacious cock talk? |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:13:03 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Jesus Hershel Christ. You folks will get triggered over anything that makes your dick uncomfortably twitch, won’t you? It’s an advertisement to sell seltzer to guys who dress cowboy but live suburban. THIS |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:13:09 PM EDT
[#47]
Creator or the brand is from a fairly well known West Texas Family. Really good people.
They did a fantastic job marketing and getting it established, especially getting acquired by Diageo. I can only imagine how much they got in the sale, Katie must have made a mint. They timed the market just right on it, honestly. Good for them. |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:21:09 PM EDT
[#48]
In all my years being a ranch hand/cowboy, I've never sat around a fire drinking beer. Must be doing it wrong.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:23:44 PM EDT
[#49]
Also, as someone who is a West Texas Native and someone who spent some time behind the stick, Ranch Water is a big thing out here and has been for a long time.
The current "Proper" recipe is just Tequila + Topo Chico + Lime. You get variations on Blanco vs Reposado, but it's that simple. Sometimes salt on rim, sometimes none. People suck them down here like you wouldn't believe. Honestly probably a 2:1 or 3:1 ratio over any other cocktail out here. For a while Casamigos was the preferred Tequila, but I think most people are using Flecha these days. Personally, I like to use a nice tequila, Topo, and just a lime wedge(no juice in the glass). Maybe a bit of orange bitters. Realistically, it's just a variation of a Highball. Chiltons are still awful, I don't claim that one as a region specific cocktail |
|
|
|
Posted: 9/28/2021 4:26:31 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted: In all my years being a ranch hand/cowboy, I've never sat around a fire drinking beer. Must be doing it wrong. Typically you end up hanging out in the machine shed drinking. Others notice as they drive by and stop in for a drink. |
|
|
Win a FREE Membership!
Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!
You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.
AR15.COM is the world's largest firearm community and is a gathering place for firearm enthusiasts of all types.
From hunters and military members, to competition shooters and general firearm enthusiasts, we welcome anyone who values and respects the way of the firearm.
Subscribe to our monthly Newsletter to receive firearm news, product discounts from your favorite Industry Partners, and more.
Copyright © 1996-2024 AR15.COM LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Any use of this content without express written consent is prohibited.
AR15.Com reserves the right to overwrite or replace any affiliate, commercial, or monetizable links, posted by users, with our own.
