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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:32:01 PM EDT
[#1]
That's fucked up OP
 
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:33:38 PM EDT
[#2]
Quoted:
So my sister is finally getting rid of her piece of shit husband, she finally decided enough as enough after he got drunk and punched their 6 year old daughter hard enough for her to lose her breath and double over. Well the lawyer fucked up somewhere and after her having the kid for a couple weeks they took her away from her, and now he has her for as long as she had her. How can she get her back legally? She is in Tennessee in case that matters. Please help here, this guy is a real piece of shit and a violent drunk and is drunk 24/7. My sister had to write a paper of all the bad shit he's done and it's 10 pages long single spaced. I'd love to go kick a door in and take her but that's not helping any. Thanks to all that help in advance, the longer he has her the worst its going to be. You need a lawyer. It probably wouldn't be extremely expensive to have a lawyer talk to you about the case. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:33:40 PM EDT
[#3]
More to the story?
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:34:43 PM EDT
[#4]
More to this story, has to be.
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:36:54 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:37:56 PM EDT
[#6]
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More to the story? As always...I'm betting there is another side to this story. Best of luck, OP. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:39:19 PM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:44:59 PM EDT
[#8]
Who is the "they" that took the kids? DFaCS? Police?
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:50:53 PM EDT
[#9]
When he punched the kid she should have called the police. That was domestic abuse/violence in any state.
There HAS TO be more than you know. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:55:59 PM EDT
[#10]
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Something is missing from this story. Not how family court works at all. OP, you might not be getting all the facts. Your sister might be close to her husband that you realize. Just saying. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? It can be exactly how family court works. Sometimes, it favors the woman even when it shouldn't. Sometimes, it goes in the guy's favor, even when it shouldn't. I've heard multiple stories over on the maternity forums about women fighting tooth and nail to get their kids out of the hands of abusers, drug addicts, and plain old neglectful, spiteful "fathers", and ultimately losing. I know the guys who do right always seem to get the shaft, but I promise there's an entirely other side of the courts that absolutely will send the kids off with an entirely unfit man and tell the woman "tough titty." |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 1:59:26 PM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:02:22 PM EDT
[#12]
Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story.
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:03:52 PM EDT
[#13]
I am 100% convinced there is more to the story . This is the first time he just up and hit the kid . You should have written a wall of text . There are 3 sides to every story , his, hers and the truth somewhere in the middle
First fire the lawyer yesterday and explain to him why . Second , Does she have any evidence of the hit ? Pictures of a bruise ? medical treatment ? police report ? Why ? Third same speech I give men getting divorced . Document everything . write a statement of events and keep a notebook . just like writing a witness statement , Third move all of her banking to a new bank. Not a new account at the same bank . Every personal item that is important to her needs to be out of the house yesterday and in storage at a friends . Has your sister ever been hit ? are there any records of this ? Restraining order is what she needs . She needs to make sure he goes to anger management before visitation . I am sure the story is missing a lot . Has she ever hit him ? serious question . Overlook that she is your sister and look for the facts . This is like seeing on still photo of a place and trying to figure out what happened 5 years before the photo was taken . |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:03:58 PM EDT
[#14]
lawyer.. end of conversation. Doing anything other than that isnt going to help the situation.
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:04:38 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Did you hear the judge say that or is that what your sister says happened? I know nothing about Tennessee but I find that story a little suspicious Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. I had to learn this one the hard way. In a divorce, both sides tint their stories to shine a bad a light as possible on the other. If you didn't see it, or hear it yourself, the truth is probably is nothing like it is being portrayed. That isn't to say that I would expect you to be anything but 100% behind your sister. Just that the story is utterly unreliable to make any kind of judgment worthy of real advice. The only advice that is worth a shit anyway is the advice you pay for from a lawyer. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:05:23 PM EDT
[#16]
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:06:23 PM EDT
[#17]
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. Im kinda curious about this too. If there isnt a piece of paper stating that the POS dad hit the kid, then it will be his word against hers. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:07:16 PM EDT
[#18]
OP, if you actually have all the facts of the case and the situation is exactly is you explain it... why are you still here? Regardless of what the courts are allowing, if someone like that was watching my niece/nephew, I wouldn't hesitate to take action. I would do anything to keep my niece/nephew safe if I thought they weren't.
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:11:50 PM EDT
[#19]
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No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:12:13 PM EDT
[#20]
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No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs You tell the cops that the child was abused, and they don't do anything? Nope. I don't buy that one at all. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:13:56 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I am 100% convinced there is more to the story . This is the first time he just up and hit the kid . You should have written a wall of text . There are 3 sides to every story , his, hers and the truth somewhere in the middle First fire the lawyer yesterday and explain to him why . Second , Does she have any evidence of the hit ? Pictures of a bruise ? medical treatment ? police report ? Why ? Third same speech I give men getting divorced . Document everything . write a statement of events and keep a notebook . just like writing a witness statement , Third move all of her banking to a new bank. Not a new account at the same bank . Every personal item that is important to her needs to be out of the house yesterday and in storage at a friends . Has your sister ever been hit ? are there any records of this ? Restraining order is what she needs . She needs to make sure he goes to anger management before visitation . I am sure the story is missing a lot . Has she ever hit him ? serious question . Overlook that she is your sister and look for the facts . This is like seeing on still photo of a place and trying to figure out what happened 5 years before the photo was taken . She is getting a new lawyer, there is a police report, she took all of her money out of the bank and she made all the money in the house and paid for the house and car, im sure she has been hit but never told us and if she ever hit him it was probably because he hit her but she has always been terrified of the guy, and i told her to get a restraining order but doubt she has. Ive been around this guy and he is scary, he is a ticking time bomb and that fuse is pretty short when he's drunk, he got in 2 fights the night before their wedding for gods sake once with her father ( not my father) and my other sisters boyfriend. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:14:53 PM EDT
[#22]
New lawyer? Can you sue the shitty lawyer or at least not pay him for this f-up?
Pool your money and buy his parental rights w/ cases of boubon? |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:17:47 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:18:06 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. If the sister's account is accurate, I'd surely fire that attorney and find one with a modicum of competence. It shouldn't be hard to get the daughter's deposition citing the physical abuse inflicted upon her by the father. That should be a 'custody slam-dunk'. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:18:45 PM EDT
[#25]
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As always...I'm betting there is another side to this story. Best of luck, OP. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? As always...I'm betting there is another side to this story. Best of luck, OP. Yup, and as always GD is the best place for legal advice. 
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:19:53 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs Wait - she "told the cops" that he punched the daughter, but the police didn't arrest? Explained above. Get your sister to see a counselor for battered women - it sounds like she has the symptoms of it. Also, call CPS. The police are obligated to be "fair" - CPS operates under no such restriction. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:21:03 PM EDT
[#27]
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Yup, and as always GD is the best place for legal advice. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? As always...I'm betting there is another side to this story. Best of luck, OP. Yup, and as always GD is the best place for legal advice. I knew there was smart people and lawyers and I couldn't find much cause my google fu is weak. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:22:47 PM EDT
[#28]
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She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:24:44 PM EDT
[#29]
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And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. How exactly? |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:25:03 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Quoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. No tellin' what else has been "left out"... |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:25:12 PM EDT
[#31]
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More to the story? Nope, not at all. I've found in my vast LE experience that normal well adjusted people tend to marry trailer trash with complete opposite personas from their own. 
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:27:01 PM EDT
[#32]
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OP, if you actually have all the facts of the case and the situation is exactly is you explain it... why are you still here? Regardless of what the courts are allowing, if someone like that was watching my niece/nephew, I wouldn't hesitate to take action. I would do anything to keep my niece/nephew safe if I thought they weren't. I can tell you, as a father, if my wife's brother came up here and got in the middle of our divorce, particularly regarding my children, it would end badly. Never involve yourself in a domestic unrest. It never pans out well for the meddler. I've SEEN a guy try to break up a fist fight between a man and a woman where BOTH people turned on the interloper. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:28:57 PM EDT
[#33]
unusual for a court to take child away from mother.
what does her lawyer say? time is of the essence here, so she'd better get back into court for another ruling. The sooner the better, especially if her husband doesn't have time to prepare, and shows up drunk in court |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:29:39 PM EDT
[#34]
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Nope, not at all. I've found in my vast LE experience that normal well adjusted people tend to marry trailer trash with complete opposite personas from their own. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? Nope, not at all. I've found in my vast LE experience that normal well adjusted people tend to marry trailer trash with complete opposite personas from their own. He seemed like a good guy at first but something changed for some reason. Trust me my sister is a good person, she somehow held a very good job while going to college for business management or something like that and just graduated, she is one of the higher ups in the company she worked at. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:32:14 PM EDT
[#35]
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How exactly? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. And this wasn't in the OP because you know this completely changes everything. How exactly? Don't play dumb. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:34:12 PM EDT
[#36]
OP, I'm not trying to be harsh, but the best thing you could do is to tell your sister to stop worrying so much about her lawyer and to tighten her own shit up. When her ex-to be hits her child, the police must be called right then and there. If she needs to leave the house with her daughter, fine. But calling the police is the very next step. This is life and death stuff.
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:35:45 PM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I can tell you, as a father, if my wife's brother came up here and got in the middle of our divorce, particularly regarding my children, it would end badly. Never involve yourself in a domestic unrest. It never pans out well for the meddler. I've SEEN a guy try to break up a fist fight between a man and a woman where BOTH people turned on the interloper. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: OP, if you actually have all the facts of the case and the situation is exactly is you explain it... why are you still here? Regardless of what the courts are allowing, if someone like that was watching my niece/nephew, I wouldn't hesitate to take action. I would do anything to keep my niece/nephew safe if I thought they weren't. I can tell you, as a father, if my wife's brother came up here and got in the middle of our divorce, particularly regarding my children, it would end badly. Never involve yourself in a domestic unrest. It never pans out well for the meddler. I've SEEN a guy try to break up a fist fight between a man and a woman where BOTH people turned on the interloper. Certainly understand. I'm sure you are a reasonable father and don't hit your kids, but imagine if you did. Hopefully a judge wouldn't blame your wife's brother for trying to help your kids if you were known to abuse them. Generally, I agree with not getting involved with a domestic dispute. Intentions are not to help the husband/wife, but to make sure the kids are safe. Like I said, if OP is 100% correct in his knowledge of the situation it's a no brainier that the kids need help. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:42:24 PM EDT
[#38]
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Certainly understand. I'm sure you are a reasonable father and don't hit your kids, but imagine if you did. Hopefully a judge wouldn't blame your wife's brother for trying to help your kids if you were known to abuse them. Generally, I agree with not getting involved with a domestic dispute. Intentions are not to help the husband/wife, but to make sure the kids are safe. Like I said, if OP is 100% correct in his knowledge of the situation it's a no brainier that the kids need help. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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OP, if you actually have all the facts of the case and the situation is exactly is you explain it... why are you still here? Regardless of what the courts are allowing, if someone like that was watching my niece/nephew, I wouldn't hesitate to take action. I would do anything to keep my niece/nephew safe if I thought they weren't. I can tell you, as a father, if my wife's brother came up here and got in the middle of our divorce, particularly regarding my children, it would end badly. Never involve yourself in a domestic unrest. It never pans out well for the meddler. I've SEEN a guy try to break up a fist fight between a man and a woman where BOTH people turned on the interloper. Certainly understand. I'm sure you are a reasonable father and don't hit your kids, but imagine if you did. Hopefully a judge wouldn't blame your wife's brother for trying to help your kids if you were known to abuse them. Generally, I agree with not getting involved with a domestic dispute. Intentions are not to help the husband/wife, but to make sure the kids are safe. Like I said, if OP is 100% correct in his knowledge of the situation it's a no brainier that the kids need help. How do you differentiate the bull shit from the truth? You always side with your family? Because nobody going through something as traumatic as a divorce could *ever* lie, stretch the truth or have their own delusions? You do what you want. Me? I figure that's what cops and courts are for. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:43:13 PM EDT
[#39]
Quoted: So my sister is finally getting rid of her piece of shit husband, she finally decided enough as enough after he got drunk and punched their 6 year old daughter hard enough for her to lose her breath and double over. Well the lawyer fucked up somewhere and after her having the kid for a couple weeks they took her away from her, and now he has her for as long as she had her. How can she get her back legally? She is in Tennessee in case that matters. Please help here, this guy is a real piece of shit and a violent drunk and is drunk 24/7. My sister had to write a paper of all the bad shit he's done and it's 10 pages long single spaced. I'd love to go kick a door in and take her but that's not helping any. Thanks to all that help in advance, the longer he has her the worst its going to be. There used to be a "social club" who took care of "men" like this. I'm pretty sure in Tennessee if you want child support you have to let the Dad have equal time with the kids. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:44:42 PM EDT
[#40]
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OP, I'm not trying to be harsh, but the best thing you could do is to tell your sister to stop worrying so much about her lawyer and to tighten her own shit up. When her ex-to be hits her child, the police must be called right then and there. If she needs to leave the house with her daughter, fine. But calling the police is the very next step. This is life and death stuff. Yeah, I'm going with this ^ Look OP, I'm obviously not in your sisters shoes so can't say for sure what I'd do in her situation but I'd HOPE that if someone, anyone, hit my child I'd know enough to instantly call the police and get his ass arrested. (After I beat the living shit out of them.) The fact that it's documented seems good. She needs to get a copy of that report, use it to get a restraining order against him, get a competent lawyer and file another petition for child custody using the new evidence. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:44:58 PM EDT
[#41]
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She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. Did "her shit" include her daughter? |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:46:23 PM EDT
[#42]
As others have said. Nope, more to the story.
Either she is leaving out a chunk of information and not telling you, or you aren't telling us. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 2:56:13 PM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Did you hear the judge say that or is that what your sister says happened? I know nothing about Tennessee but I find that story a little suspicious Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. This. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:00:07 PM EDT
[#44]
There would be a court order, ask your sister to let you see it. Family court & kids = "Best interest of the child" and not "the lawyer fucked up somewhere" so this is what my order is.
If she's unhappy with the order, she can appeal, or ask for a rehearing in view of new evidence/facts/arguments. You can always revisit "the best interest of the child." |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:00:29 PM EDT
[#45]
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I had to learn this one the hard way. In a divorce, both sides tint their stories to shine a bad a light as possible on the other. If you didn't see it, or hear it yourself, the truth is probably is nothing like it is being portrayed. That isn't to say that I would expect you to be anything but 100% behind your sister. Just that the story is utterly unreliable to make any kind of judgment worthy of real advice. The only advice that is worth a shit anyway is the advice you pay for from a lawyer. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. I had to learn this one the hard way. In a divorce, both sides tint their stories to shine a bad a light as possible on the other. If you didn't see it, or hear it yourself, the truth is probably is nothing like it is being portrayed. That isn't to say that I would expect you to be anything but 100% behind your sister. Just that the story is utterly unreliable to make any kind of judgment worthy of real advice. The only advice that is worth a shit anyway is the advice you pay for from a lawyer. This. Support your sister but be wary as hell of believing anything you don't see hear/see first hand. Believing everything you get told is liable to lead you into making things worse. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:07:42 PM EDT
[#46]
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Did "her shit" include her daughter? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Was he arrested after he punched the kid? If not, your sister is leaving out large portions of the story. No but she did tell the cops. He has been arrested multiple times and has gotten multiple DUIs He got drunk, punched a child, the police were called, given the story and they did NOT arrest him??? That raises a huge red flag for me. Something is missing from this story. She didn't call them immediately after for some stupid reason, she actually just grabbed her shit and left, like I said she is absolutely terrified of the guy and for good reason. He actually called the cops on her the next day and she told them what happened and they said " we can't do anything now but will document it " or something like that. Did "her shit" include her daughter? I guess I forgot to include and her daughter. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:11:02 PM EDT
[#47]
So obviously a lot has been left out.
OP there is nothing you can do, why? Because you didn't document, you didn't file proper police reports, and she let it happen by allowing her daughter to be in that situation WITHOUT calling the police. Basically what the court sees is hearsay from a jealous ex and sees that the dad has some dui's and some convictions for things he did but time he did serve. Just because you drink, just because you have a DUI doesn't mean you're a shit dad.... I know a guy with 3 DUI's and likes to drink himself to shit, but never around kids and he's the nicest guy you'll ever met... he just loves to party. On the other hand they see a mother who also by the sounds has had her issues considering the cops were called on her, making totally absurd hearsay claims. Basically, the lack of documentation and charges makes it a even playing field legally. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:14:38 PM EDT
[#48]
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This. Support your sister but be wary as hell of believing anything you don't see hear/see first hand. Believing everything you get told is liable to lead you into making things worse. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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More to the story? Not really. Judge said there was defeciancy in the lawyers case so he gets her for as long as my sister had her. I had to learn this one the hard way. In a divorce, both sides tint their stories to shine a bad a light as possible on the other. If you didn't see it, or hear it yourself, the truth is probably is nothing like it is being portrayed. That isn't to say that I would expect you to be anything but 100% behind your sister. Just that the story is utterly unreliable to make any kind of judgment worthy of real advice. The only advice that is worth a shit anyway is the advice you pay for from a lawyer. This. Support your sister but be wary as hell of believing anything you don't see hear/see first hand. Believing everything you get told is liable to lead you into making things worse. I saw how easy it is to make this sociopath explode in anger first hand and I have been fearing for my sisters life and my nieces life for years now after that. My sister isn't a gentle person but she couldn't exactly handle a fight against this guy and until now has been scared to leave him. She doesn't have a gun but I told her to buy a decent pistol but I don't think she will, not like she has the heart to shoot the guy if she had to but maybe she does. |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:16:02 PM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted: How do you differentiate the bull shit from the truth? You always side with your family? Because nobody going through something as traumatic as a divorce could *ever* lie, stretch the truth or have their own delusions? You do what you want. Me? I figure that's what cops and courts are for. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: OP, if you actually have all the facts of the case and the situation is exactly is you explain it... why are you still here? Regardless of what the courts are allowing, if someone like that was watching my niece/nephew, I wouldn't hesitate to take action. I would do anything to keep my niece/nephew safe if I thought they weren't. I can tell you, as a father, if my wife's brother came up here and got in the middle of our divorce, particularly regarding my children, it would end badly. Never involve yourself in a domestic unrest. It never pans out well for the meddler. I've SEEN a guy try to break up a fist fight between a man and a woman where BOTH people turned on the interloper. Certainly understand. I'm sure you are a reasonable father and don't hit your kids, but imagine if you did. Hopefully a judge wouldn't blame your wife's brother for trying to help your kids if you were known to abuse them. Generally, I agree with not getting involved with a domestic dispute. Intentions are not to help the husband/wife, but to make sure the kids are safe. Like I said, if OP is 100% correct in his knowledge of the situation it's a no brainier that the kids need help. How do you differentiate the bull shit from the truth? You always side with your family? Because nobody going through something as traumatic as a divorce could *ever* lie, stretch the truth or have their own delusions? You do what you want. Me? I figure that's what cops and courts are for. lol? I'm not sure if you think I'm just trying to disagree with you, but that's not my intent. I qualify my statements based on the OP being 100% correct with his understanding of the situation. If he doesn't have the full story then obviously that changes the range of appropriate responses. My intent is to bring to light that it's likely the OP already knows he doesn't have a full story, because if he genuinely believed the version of the story he told us, it's not unreasonable to respond the way I described in the fictional scenario I created where I was in OP's shoes. If you saw your wife's brother punch his kids (that is to say, you believe without any doubts that he is hurting someone you care about), would you stop him? |
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Posted: 6/23/2016 3:17:05 PM EDT
[#50]
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When he punched the kid she should have called the police. That was domestic abuse/violence in any state. There HAS TO be more than you know. This. He should've done jail time. Your sister missed a golden opportunity to slap an order of protection on his ass. |
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