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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:24:42 PM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender. Says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you $300 that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single, solitary drop." The bartender looks. I mean, we're talking, like, this glass is like a good ten feet away. He says, "Now wait, let me get this strait. You're tryin' to tell me you'll bet me $300 that you can piss, standing over here, way over there into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says, "That's right." Bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go. Here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's lookin' at the glass, man. He's thinkin' about the glass. He's thinkin' about the glass. Glass. He's thinkin' about the glass, glass. Thinkin' about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. And then, *foosh*, he lets it rip. And he-he's pisses all over the place, man. He's pissin' on the bar. He pissin' on the stools, on the floor, on the phone, on the bartender! He's pissing everywhere *except* the fucking glass! Right? Okay. So, bartender, he's laughing his fuckin' ass off. He's $300 richer. He's like, "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Piss dripping off his face. "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300 punta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one-one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. In back, there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, 300." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "Well, see those guys over there? I just bet them $500 a piece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you not be mad about it, you'd be happy." Not the first time I heard that one. Funny every time. Almost as funny as "Do they call me Mickey the ship builder?" Now, who the fuck is the photoshoped dude? |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:25:56 PM EDT
[#2]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Not the first time I heard that one. Funny every time. Almost as funny as "Do they call me Mickey the ship builder?" Now, who the fuck is the photoshoped dude? Dave_A |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:26:28 PM EDT
[#3]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Not the first time I heard that one. Funny every time. Almost as funny as "Do they call me Mickey the ship builder?" Now, who the fuck is the photoshoped dude? Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Originally Posted By beitodesstrafe: This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender. Says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you $300 that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single, solitary drop." The bartender looks. I mean, we're talking, like, this glass is like a good ten feet away. He says, "Now wait, let me get this strait. You're tryin' to tell me you'll bet me $300 that you can piss, standing over here, way over there into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says, "That's right." Bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go. Here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's lookin' at the glass, man. He's thinkin' about the glass. He's thinkin' about the glass. Glass. He's thinkin' about the glass, glass. Thinkin' about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. And then, *foosh*, he lets it rip. And he-he's pisses all over the place, man. He's pissin' on the bar. He pissin' on the stools, on the floor, on the phone, on the bartender! He's pissing everywhere *except* the fucking glass! Right? Okay. So, bartender, he's laughing his fuckin' ass off. He's $300 richer. He's like, "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Piss dripping off his face. "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300 punta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one-one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. In back, there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, 300." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "Well, see those guys over there? I just bet them $500 a piece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you not be mad about it, you'd be happy." Not the first time I heard that one. Funny every time. Almost as funny as "Do they call me Mickey the ship builder?" Now, who the fuck is the photoshoped dude? I'll just say he's one of the 8000. 
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:28:53 PM EDT
[#4]
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:30:05 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Dave_A Dave_A? What, an underscore? Who is Dave_A? Is this like deej? |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:30:38 PM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Dave_A? What, an underscore? Who is Dave_A? Is this like deej? Dave's not here man. But he was a pretty big deal for a while. |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:31:26 PM EDT
[#7]
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:34:08 PM EDT
[#8]
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:34:29 PM EDT
[#9]
Fun fact if you Google 8000 make friends here and click the first link it takes you to page Boob.
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:34:51 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Dave's not here man. But he was a pretty big deal for a while. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Originally Posted By zach_: Dave_A? What, an underscore? Who is Dave_A? Is this like deej? Dave's not here man. But he was a pretty big deal for a while. Ban hammer? |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:37:13 PM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Fun fact if you Google 8000 make friends here and click the first link it takes you to page Boob. I remember the 8000 thread. The jello salad art. Our Oklahoma friend with bad feet... |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:38:51 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Fun fact if you Google 8000 make friends here and click the first link it takes you to page Boob. Well fuck, that's true. 
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:39:13 PM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Ban hammer? Just GD. He would derail like EVERY thread for years where it would just be quote tree after quote tree. Then he admitted to getting people he didn't like riled up to where they got banned. Then he got banned from GD. |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 7:55:53 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: Well fuck, that's true. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: Originally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Fun fact if you Google 8000 make friends here and click the first link it takes you to page Boob. Well fuck, that's true. Hey @beitodesstrafe Click To View Spoiler 
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Posted: 8/9/2022 8:01:01 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryOriginally Posted By kbi: Originally Posted By beitodesstrafe: Originally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Fun fact if you Google 8000 make friends here and click the first link it takes you to page Boob. Well fuck, that's true. Hey @beitodesstrafe Click To View Spoiler
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Posted: 8/9/2022 8:07:46 PM EDT
[#16]
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Posted: 8/9/2022 8:21:43 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Just GD. He would derail like EVERY thread for years where it would just be quote tree after quote tree. Then he admitted to getting people he didn't like riled up to where they got banned. Then he got banned from GD. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Originally Posted By zach_: Ban hammer? Just GD. He would derail like EVERY thread for years where it would just be quote tree after quote tree. Then he admitted to getting people he didn't like riled up to where they got banned. Then he got banned from GD. Sounds like a real cocksucker. I worked with several cocksuckers, being in sales over the years. They were more interested in stirring up shit, as they were hitting their numbers. |
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Posted: 8/9/2022 8:42:28 PM EDT
[#18]
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Posted: 8/9/2022 9:10:21 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Just GD. He would derail like EVERY thread for years where it would just be quote tree after quote tree. Then he admitted to getting people he didn't like riled up to where they got banned. Then he got banned from GD. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Originally Posted By zach_: Ban hammer? Just GD. He would derail like EVERY thread for years where it would just be quote tree after quote tree. Then he admitted to getting people he didn't like riled up to where they got banned. Then he got banned from GD. 
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Posted: 8/9/2022 10:10:12 PM EDT
[#20]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:06:21 AM EDT
[#21]
Hard to believe I've had 15k posts here.....in all those posts I've typed fewer words than Geralt55 has in the last 2 weeks.
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:22:18 AM EDT
[#22]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By fox2008: Hard to believe I've had 15k posts here.....in all those posts I've typed fewer words than Geralt55 has in the last 2 weeks.  *a short time a go on a page not far from here* "Hey man, GD fucked me- they need me to review a movie. It smells woke too  ""Yeah? That sucks man- which movie did they Woke up?" "Predator - I," Mfw:  Goldberg's epic entrance: WWE Survivor Series 2016
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Posted: 8/10/2022 11:08:47 AM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: That's Dave_A Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Notcalifornialegal: Originally Posted By zach_: OK, I guess I missed something long ago. Who the fuck is the name behind that face that gets shopped into arf images lately. That's Dave_A Bingo |
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Posted: 8/10/2022 4:45:33 PM EDT
[Last Edit: doc_Zox]
[#24]
 BDE |
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Posted: 8/10/2022 6:42:03 PM EDT
[#25]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 6:50:57 PM EDT
[#26]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 6:52:13 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Skywarp2203: https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/604025/87183520.jpg 
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Posted: 8/10/2022 7:59:58 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Skywarp2203: https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/604025/87183520.jpg Wait s fkn minutes There's a spanking scented candle ? |
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Posted: 8/10/2022 8:00:28 PM EDT
[#29]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 8:34:49 PM EDT
[Last Edit: kbi]
[#30]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:15:57 PM EDT
[#31]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:18:51 PM EDT
[#32]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:51:57 PM EDT
[#33]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:53:07 PM EDT
[#34]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 9:54:41 PM EDT
[#35]
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Posted: 8/10/2022 11:46:05 PM EDT
[#36]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 12:10:22 AM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Skywarp2203: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/91271/72CF61D1-02DA-4E05-B5D6-E0A084255E93-987086.jpg  La Pistola Y El Corazón |
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Posted: 8/11/2022 6:42:24 AM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By doc_Zox: https://i.imgur.com/XrDnrPA_d.webp?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By doc_Zox: Thank you Couldn't function last night To hot inside |
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Posted: 8/11/2022 11:29:41 AM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By Skywarp2203:  |
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Posted: 8/11/2022 1:19:39 PM EDT
[#40]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 1:22:57 PM EDT
[#41]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 1:44:05 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By doc_Zox: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/3097/newNVABBDW-1243770.png 
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:19:16 PM EDT
[#43]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:20:31 PM EDT
[#44]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:21:08 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By kbi: For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige. One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!". Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs. I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By kbi: Originally Posted By Skywarp2203: Originally Posted By kbi: Originally Posted By Skywarp2203: https://cdn.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/2391127/87182788.jpg Wish I was alive for a cheap menu like this. @Skywarp2203 Que Gordo es I remember the 48 hamburger and 58 cheeseburgers and fresh wer like .60 and fillers of fish were under a buck Fuck Haven't ate all day Off to McDonald's McChickens! For me, it's the McChicken. The best fast food sandwich. I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige. One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!". Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs. I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant. 
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:21:32 PM EDT
[#46]
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:22:40 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: OK, I guess I missed something long ago. Who the fuck is the name behind that face that gets shopped into arf images lately. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By zach_: Originally Posted By kbi: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/91271/86570BE0-AE42-4C17-928E-7232FBE9D455-1097518.jpg OK, I guess I missed something long ago. Who the fuck is the name behind that face that gets shopped into arf images lately. Me.....
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:23:12 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender. Says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you $300 that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single, solitary drop." The bartender looks. I mean, we're talking, like, this glass is like a good ten feet away. He says, "Now wait, let me get this strait. You're tryin' to tell me you'll bet me $300 that you can piss, standing over here, way over there into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says, "That's right." Bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go. Here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's lookin' at the glass, man. He's thinkin' about the glass. He's thinkin' about the glass. Glass. He's thinkin' about the glass, glass. Thinkin' about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. And then, *foosh*, he lets it rip. And he-he's pisses all over the place, man. He's pissin' on the bar. He pissin' on the stools, on the floor, on the phone, on the bartender! He's pissing everywhere *except* the fucking glass! Right? Okay. So, bartender, he's laughing his fuckin' ass off. He's $300 richer. He's like, "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Piss dripping off his face. "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300 punta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one-one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. In back, there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, 300." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "Well, see those guys over there? I just bet them $500 a piece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you not be mad about it, you'd be happy." Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: Originally Posted By zach_: Originally Posted By kbi: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/91271/86570BE0-AE42-4C17-928E-7232FBE9D455-1097518.jpg OK, I guess I missed something long ago. Who the fuck is the name behind that face that gets shopped into arf images lately. This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender. Says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you $300 that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single, solitary drop." The bartender looks. I mean, we're talking, like, this glass is like a good ten feet away. He says, "Now wait, let me get this strait. You're tryin' to tell me you'll bet me $300 that you can piss, standing over here, way over there into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says, "That's right." Bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go. Here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's lookin' at the glass, man. He's thinkin' about the glass. He's thinkin' about the glass. Glass. He's thinkin' about the glass, glass. Thinkin' about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. And then, *foosh*, he lets it rip. And he-he's pisses all over the place, man. He's pissin' on the bar. He pissin' on the stools, on the floor, on the phone, on the bartender! He's pissing everywhere *except* the fucking glass! Right? Okay. So, bartender, he's laughing his fuckin' ass off. He's $300 richer. He's like, "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Piss dripping off his face. "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300 punta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one-one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. In back, there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, 300." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "Well, see those guys over there? I just bet them $500 a piece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you not be mad about it, you'd be happy."
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:24:04 PM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: I'll just say he's one of the 8000. Quote HistoryOriginally Posted By beitodesstrafe: Originally Posted By zach_: Originally Posted By beitodesstrafe: This reminds me of a joke. This guy comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender. Says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you $300 that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single, solitary drop." The bartender looks. I mean, we're talking, like, this glass is like a good ten feet away. He says, "Now wait, let me get this strait. You're tryin' to tell me you'll bet me $300 that you can piss, standing over here, way over there into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" Customer looks up and says, "That's right." Bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet." The guy goes, "Okay, here we go. Here we go." Pulls out his thing. He's lookin' at the glass, man. He's thinkin' about the glass. He's thinkin' about the glass. Glass. He's thinkin' about the glass, glass. Thinkin' about his dick. Dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass, dick, glass. And then, *foosh*, he lets it rip. And he-he's pisses all over the place, man. He's pissin' on the bar. He pissin' on the stools, on the floor, on the phone, on the bartender! He's pissing everywhere *except* the fucking glass! Right? Okay. So, bartender, he's laughing his fuckin' ass off. He's $300 richer. He's like, "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" Piss dripping off his face. "Ha, ha, ha, ha!" He says, "You fucking idiot, man! You got it in everything except the glass! You owe me $300 punta." Guy goes, "Excuse me just one-one little second." Goes in the back of the bar. In back, there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them. Comes back to the bar. Goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, 300." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost $300, idiot!" The guy says, "Well, see those guys over there? I just bet them $500 a piece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you not be mad about it, you'd be happy." Not the first time I heard that one. Funny every time. Almost as funny as "Do they call me Mickey the ship builder?" Now, who the fuck is the photoshoped dude? I'll just say he's one of the 8000. Ha |
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Posted: 8/11/2022 3:26:49 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryOriginally Posted By DK-Prof: Originally Posted By Skywarp2203: https://thumbs.gfycat.com/FormalGaseousGlassfrog-max-1mb.gif https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/1715/capamerica-1087003.jpg
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