Colonoscopy tomorrow 0845 - Page 3

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Colonoscopy tomorrow 0845 (Page 3 of 3)

Posted: 9/30/2019 11:50:42 PM EDT

[#1]

I would close my eyes and open them as they started the IV, I did this 3 times. I finally asked when are you going to start, they said we're already finished!

WHAAAT!

Posted: 9/30/2019 11:54:59 PM EDT

[#2]

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The appropriate response to any discomfort or pain = "Using the whole fist doc?"

https://i.makeagif.com/media/8-24-2017/o4PVJ_.gif

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Fletch and Heavy Metal in the same thread

Posted: 10/1/2019 12:04:53 AM EDT

[#3]

I had one 3 weeks ago... I have UC so I get them every 2 years. Prep is definitely the rough part. Propofol burns a little going in but before you realize it you're awake in your room. Good luck OP.

Posted: 10/1/2019 5:18:16 AM EDT

[#4]

Good luck.
Just remember, the procedure has put more people in the hospital then they actually save.

Posted: 10/1/2019 5:29:02 AM EDT

[#5]

You'll be so high after procedure you won't even know it.
Be careful making ANY decisions until the next day. Shit made me want to look at motorcycle dealerships and kick tires. Almost bought something stupid and expensive.

Posted: 10/1/2019 5:46:19 AM EDT

[#6]

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Quoted:
Good luck.
Just remember, the procedure has put more people in the hospital then they actually save.

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Bullshit.

Posted: 10/1/2019 6:18:13 AM EDT

[#7]

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Quoted:

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Might be the most apropos gif ever posted.

Posted: 10/1/2019 12:16:58 PM EDT

[#8]

Best BLT ever

I don't remember anything past "Turn all the way over on to your left side".

Next thing they were waking me up. I did sit up a little too quickly and almost face planted but nothing too exciting other than that.

For some reason, "Brown chicken brown cow" is stuck in my head though

Posted: 10/1/2019 12:33:16 PM EDT

[#9]

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I put it off for years.

The Doc finally said to do the Cologard deal, so I did. There's no prep.

He never got back to me, so, it's over.

For a while.

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I got a Cologard kit in the mail yesterday. Basically, I just have to shit into a plastic jar.

Posted: 10/1/2019 12:37:45 PM EDT

[#10]

You amateurs and your colonoscopy threads

<--------annual here since 2006

Posted: 10/1/2019 12:41:04 PM EDT

[#11]

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The procedure isn't the rough part. The prep is the rough part. The rough, then tender, sensitive, inflamed and chapped monkey butt part.

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Wrong.

Posted: 10/1/2019 2:59:02 PM EDT

[#12]

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Quoted:
https://uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/buttspray.gif

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Still waiting for the story behind (!) this...

Posted: 10/1/2019 3:18:53 PM EDT

[#13]

Quote History

Quoted:
I put it off for years.

The Doc finally said to do the Cologard deal, so I did. There's no prep.

He never got back to me, so, it's over.

For a while.

View Quote

Does that just tell you if you have cancer or not?

This looks for it before you get it.

Posted: 10/1/2019 3:22:56 PM EDT

[#14]

eat a bunch of taco bell beforehand

Posted: 10/1/2019 3:40:59 PM EDT

[#15]

I didn't get put under for mine but then again my dentist did it kind of spur of the moment which I thought was odd.

Posted: 10/1/2019 3:53:02 PM EDT

[#16]

Quote History

Quoted:
You'll be so high after procedure you won't even know it.
Be careful making ANY decisions until the next day. Shit made me want to look at motorcycle dealerships and kick tires. Almost bought something stupid and expensive.

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I stopped at a Ferrari dealership. Smarmy bastards didn't even come outside.

Posted: 10/1/2019 5:09:27 PM EDT

[#17]

Quote History

Quoted:

Might be the most apropos gif ever posted.

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I also would like to know the backstory of that.

Posted: 10/1/2019 5:16:11 PM EDT

[#18]

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Good for you for getting an early appt. Mine was in the afternoon, I was STARVING by then and had screaming caffeine withdraw.

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I have a bidet. The prep was effortless thanks to that.

The starvation was the worst part by far for me.

And I was kind of surprised that there were no less than a dozen people in the fucking room too when the wheeled me in.

Posted: 10/3/2019 7:27:20 AM EDT

[#19]

mine is in 2 hours. Prep wasn’t as bad this time. I literally just didn’t drink or eat anything other than the prep and required water intake on the instructions.

Nothing going in apparently means nothing coming out. Much easier this way

Posted: 10/3/2019 7:36:01 AM EDT

[#20]

I’m 36 so I don’t think I have to do one too soon. Sometimes I wouldn’t mind doing the prep just to clean the system out every once in awhile

Posted: 10/3/2019 11:40:05 AM EDT

[#21]

Quote History

Quoted:
I’m 36 so I don’t think I have to do one too soon. Sometimes I wouldn’t mind doing the prep just to clean the system out every once in awhile

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Oh gawd no.

My 20 something son had to get one a year or so ago.

Posted: 10/3/2019 11:41:45 AM EDT

[#22]

Everyone needs to post their Colonoscopy adventure

Posted: 10/3/2019 12:04:19 PM EDT

[#23]

Quote History

Quoted:

I also would like to know the backstory of that.

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From 2015(?)
If you had to guess which country was most likely to produce a video wherein a sporting event is interrupted by a moment involving a player’s naked butt being sprayed with a mysterious substance, which would you choose? If your thought (like mine) was the Netherlands, you were so close. Belgium is the setting for this pseudo-sexual scene, in a match-up between Jupiler League (the top Belgian division) sides Charleroi and Club Brugge.
Charleroi’s Javier Martos hurt his butt, and medical technology has apparently advanced to the point that one can immediately ice an injury with a cold spray applied with what looks like a giant caulking gun. In this case, the spray was applied to Martos’ butt. Martos appeared to be in serious pain, but thank goodness he wound up being okay, because it’s impossible to stop laughing at the faces he makes while being sprayed like a child who sat on a hill of fire ants.

Posted: 10/3/2019 12:13:20 PM EDT

[#24]

Quote History

Quoted:
I didn't get put under for mine but then again my dentist did it kind of spur of the moment which I thought was odd.

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Did he have both hands on your shoulders during the procedure?

Posted: 10/3/2019 12:26:53 PM EDT

[#25]

it is the most relaxing 15 minute nap ever! love that drug.

Posted: 10/3/2019 2:21:26 PM EDT

[#26]

Preliminary results nothing too exciting. One polyp that got sent off for testing and some diverticulosis (kind of a bummer but not totally unexpected).

Full consult after biopsy results are in.

Posted: 10/3/2019 2:56:10 PM EDT

[#27]

Quote History

Quoted:
Preliminary results nothing too exciting. One polyp that got sent off for testing and some diverticulosis (kind of a bummer but not totally unexpected).

Full consult after biopsy results are in.

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If you had a polyp then you will have to do another colonoscopy in at least 5 yrs. My first one I had a small polyp so I had to do it again 5 yrs later (this year). No polyp this time but doc said to still do it in another 5 yrs. And since these are now considered diagnostic and not just routine because of the polyp I will have to pay a portion instead of being covered 100% like a routine one.

Posted: 10/3/2019 3:13:46 PM EDT

[#28]

I am 57 , never had one (yet) and still in the exit only club.

Posted: 10/3/2019 3:39:19 PM EDT

[#29]

I have a upper and lower scoping. This will my my first experience with this. So what foods are you eating ? I'm getting my paper work tomorrow all I know is clear liquids. ( so I said "like vodka?" they said no!

)

If I don't eat I get a little sick and mean. So what are you eating the day before and day of? My appointment is at 10 am so I can skip eating the day of it. Do I have to fast for 24 hours?

Never in my life did I think I would have to pay strange men to drug me and Oral and Anal rape me with robot dicks.

Posted: 10/3/2019 3:43:28 PM EDT

[#30]

Quote History

Quoted:
I am 57 , never had one (yet) and still in the exit only club.

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Highly recommended for anyone over 50. I watched a FIL die from colon cancer and it’s a bad way to go out.

Posted: 10/3/2019 4:14:21 PM EDT

[#31]

Quote History

Quoted:
I have a upper and lower scoping. This will my my first experience with this. So what foods are you eating ? I'm getting my paper work tomorrow all I know is clear liquids. ( so I said "like vodka?" they said no!

)

If I don't eat I get a little sick and mean. So what are you eating the day before and day of? My appointment is at 10 am so I can skip eating the day of it. Do I have to fast for 24 hours?

Never in my life did I think I would have to pay strange men to drug me and Oral and Anal rape me with robot dicks.

View Quote

I ate one or two small meals a day. Easily digested foods. Ramen noodle, toast or eggs.

Don't eat any whole grains or nuts and no raw fruit or veggies for a few days prior. Don't starve, but just curb what and how much you eat temporarily. Your doctor should have sent you a list of what to avoid.

Posted: 10/3/2019 4:21:56 PM EDT

[#32]

Quote History

Quoted:
I have a upper and lower scoping. This will my my first experience with this. So what foods are you eating ? I'm getting my paper work tomorrow all I know is clear liquids. ( so I said "like vodka?" they said no!

)

If I don't eat I get a little sick and mean. So what are you eating the day before and day of? My appointment is at 10 am so I can skip eating the day of it. Do I have to fast for 24 hours?

Never in my life did I think I would have to pay strange men to drug me and Oral and Anal rape me with robot dicks.

View Quote

Jello, as long as it's not red.
Broth and ramen noodles is good, too.

Posted: 10/3/2019 4:27:48 PM EDT

[#33]

Quote History

Quoted:
I’m 36 so I don’t think I have to do one too soon. Sometimes I wouldn’t mind doing the prep just to clean the system out every once in awhile

View Quote

You think that now. You will shit out a crayon you chewed when you were 3. And the smell will kill small furry animals and birds.

Posted: 10/3/2019 4:29:45 PM EDT

[#34]

Quote History

Quoted:

Highly recommended for anyone over 50. I watched a FIL die from colon cancer and it’s a bad way to go out.

View Quote

This. I watched a friend in his 40's die from colon cancer. He ignored early symptoms and by time he went to the doctor it had spread to his liver. He was dead in less than 3 years after they discovered it.

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Colonoscopy tomorrow 0845 (Page 3 of 3)

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