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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Hot pockets... (Page 1 of 2)

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:40:51 PM EDT

Suck!

I wanted a snack...So made I made a jalepeno chicken hot pocket. I microwaved it, and let it sit a bit...I bit into it, and FUCKING NAPALM LIKE CHEESE squirted on my lip!

Now I look like I have herpes.

CSB and all that, and I'll eat the other one...

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:42:09 PM EDT

[#1]

Warning: Hot Pocket will be hot

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:43:15 PM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:
Warning: Hot Pocket will be hot

Give it time...some douche will try to sue. It just won't be this douche.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:44:34 PM EDT

[#3]

Ain't nothin' sadder than a man bitchin' about hot microwaved food.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:44:38 PM EDT

[#4]

Yeah, don't bite into a hot pocket.

Use a fork.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:45:01 PM EDT

[#5]

I usually get in my time machine and make them 10 minutes before I was actually going to make them, so that they're cooled down when I actually want to eat them.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:46:02 PM EDT

[#6]

I always read hot pockets in the sing-song voice of Jim Gaffigan.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:46:04 PM EDT

[#7]

Newbie!

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:47:18 PM EDT

[#8]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nu-dLUJzsW8

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:47:19 PM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
Ain't nothin' sadder than a man bitchin' about hot microwaved food.

More of a post about me doing something stupid...

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:47:23 PM EDT

[#10]

Jim Gaffigan on hot pockets

Will it burn my mouth?

It'll destroy your mouth.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:47:38 PM EDT

[#11]

Your suppose to leave them in the microwave for a min or 2 before eating them

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:47:54 PM EDT

[#12]

HOT.....pocket

hot
pocket

hot pocket

hmm, i wonder if this sumbitch will be hot? lol

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:48:16 PM EDT

[#13]

the only food that can still be frozen and burn the shit out of your mouth.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:48:46 PM EDT

[#14]

http://i121.photobucket.com/albums/o204/weatherman9999/blasphemy/SMALL___Blasphemy___Shelly.jpg

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:48:52 PM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Ain't nothin' sadder than a man bitchin' about hot microwaved food.

More of a post about me doing something stupid...

Just hit it for 1:45 grasshoppa.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:49:17 PM EDT

[#16]

Sorry to hear about your herpes, chef.

Pretty clever cover story, though

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:49:59 PM EDT

[#17]

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:50:58 PM EDT

[#18]

Bite off the corner and let it vent next time, bro

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:51:00 PM EDT

[#19]

I have been there. I bit into one and a peice
of pepperoni with molten cheese flopped
down on my lower lip. My God. Felt like a
blowtorch had been turned on my lip.

Took about three days to heal up, and another
three to regain the feeling in it.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:51:26 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:
Sorry to hear about your herpes, chef.

Pretty clever cover story, though

Herpes would have to hurt less...shit blistered immediately.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:52:38 PM EDT

[#21]

It looked like you had herpes even before you bit into that hot pocket..

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:52:43 PM EDT

[#22]

Hoooot Pockeeeeeeet!

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:53:17 PM EDT

[#23]

If you can stand to eat a "Hot Pocket", you can stand to look like a herpes infested street walker.

Bletch.

Posted: 4/25/2011 7:55:38 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
It looked like you had herpes even before you bit into that hot pocket..

Who the fuck are you?

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:01:58 PM EDT

[#25]

I just don't understand why they don't already come in the crisper . Why do you have to take 10 more seconds to put in the crisper?

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:07:03 PM EDT

[#26]

one of the guys at work burnt himself so severely he needed to have the wound Debridement preformed by a doctor

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:08:21 PM EDT

[#27]

Probably just as well you didn't do a dinner pic this time.

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:14:12 PM EDT

[#28]

Good luck later. hah - some serious chemical reactions courtesy of hotpockets

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:15:07 PM EDT

[#29]

Hot Pocket for breakfast
Hot Pocket for lunch
Dead by supper time!

HOT POCKET!

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:18:28 PM EDT

[#30]

hilarious thread "diareah pooocket"

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:23:16 PM EDT

[#31]

You should try an Alabama Hot Pocket.

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:28:26 PM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:
Jim Gaffigan on hot pockets

Will it burn my mouth?

It'll destroy your mouth.

He cracks me up....here is a video and at about the 5 minute mark he talks about bacon

. Thought yall might enjoy. If someone could embed that would be great.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qle-vjHoQa4&feature=related

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:30:23 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
Jim Gaffigan on hot pockets

Will it burn my mouth?

It'll destroy your mouth.

FUCKING HATE THAT GUY!! his whiney bitch sniveling makes me wanna kill bunnies in the face with kittens while driving them down the throat of a rabid pitbull getting their nutz lopped off.

Posted: 4/25/2011 8:52:15 PM EDT

[#34]

some microwaves have the ability to reduce their power.

so figure out how to reduce power to 50%, and cook it twice as long,

Posted: 4/25/2011 9:06:34 PM EDT

[#35]

Just stick them in your pocket until they cool down.

Maybe they'll be cool by 2012 or so.

Posted: 4/25/2011 9:09:47 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:

You should try an Alabama Hot Pocket.

That is nasty

Posted: 4/25/2011 9:10:19 PM EDT

[#37]

Quoted:
You can have a Hot Pocket for breakfast, Hot Pocket for lunch, and be Dead by supper time dinner!

DEAD POCKET!

FIFY.

Posted: 4/25/2011 9:31:48 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:

Warning: Hot Pocket will be hot

Do not taunt hot pocket.

Posted: 4/25/2011 10:03:31 PM EDT

[#39]

personally....i think i could mail a hot pocket to some one , and when it arrives...they could nuke it and eat it and not die.

Posted: 4/25/2011 10:10:08 PM EDT

[#40]

Quoted:
the only food that can still be frozen and burn the shit out of your mouth.

Other than that and the fact that they taste like a chemistry set, they aren't too bad.

Posted: 4/25/2011 10:10:16 PM EDT

[#41]

Paul Merage sits in his mansion and chuckles at the hot pocket amateur...

yes, his is the big one. keep in mind those other houses are very large multi million dollar homes.

Posted: 4/25/2011 10:37:42 PM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:

I just don't understand why they don't already come in the crisper . Why do you have to take 10 more seconds to put in the crisper?

That guy had to be laid off.

Posted: 4/25/2011 11:04:41 PM EDT

[#43]

Quoted:
I always read hot pockets in the sing-song voice of Jim Gaffigan.

Funny dude! I saw him when he was in town a couple years ago. I also read it in his voice.
ETA:I have never eaten a hot pocket.

Posted: 4/25/2011 11:18:01 PM EDT

[#44]

Posted: 4/26/2011 12:26:16 AM EDT

[#45]

they're delicious, you pay the price for excellence

Posted: 4/26/2011 12:40:02 AM EDT

[#46]

The breakfast ones are better. I love the smell of "napalm" in the morning!

Posted: 4/26/2011 12:42:53 AM EDT

[#47]

HAVE YOU TRIED THE HOT POCKET HOT POCKET?!

IT'S A HOT POCKET WRAPPED IN A HOT POCKET!

TASTES JUST LIKE A HOT POCKET!

I'M GONNA STICK MY HEAD IN A MICROWAVE

HOT POCKEEEET

Posted: 4/26/2011 12:45:25 AM EDT

[#48]

Herpes hot pocket.

A perfect description for much of the available Pie.

Posted: 4/26/2011 1:06:31 AM EDT

[#49]

Amateur.

Posted: 4/26/2011 9:52:23 AM EDT

[#50]

never eat them as a "sandwich" or in that holder
cook, remove from crisper thing, cut into 4 or 5 pieces to let them cool, then eat

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Hot pockets... (Page 1 of 2)