[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Job ads are funny (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 6/6/2017 2:32:32 AM EDT
|
Trying to cross over from the bar/nightclub world to the realm of normal employment is amusing at times. I'm primarily looking for water resource jobs, but am casting a wider net since that market is pretty specific. One of my daily search terms is "research." This is my favorite research ad so far:
Requirements:
Experience leading proposal teams in discussions on proposal win themes and other strategic messages Exceptional written communication skills, including conveying technical information and complicated ideas into language and concepts easily understood by others, proper grammar and mechanics, and editing/revising skills Expert ability with MS Word, PowerPoint, Adobe Acrobat, and design software Demonstrated ability to improve company processes, develop resources, maintain consistent and timely communication with stakeholders, and manage multiple complex proposal efforts and teams simultaneously Demonstrated ability to identify key components of an RFP and use them to develop a customized checklist, style manual, acronym list, and other tools to ensure compliance for each proposal effort Compensation : This will be an Hourly Position, see below for wage range
$14.00 – $18.00 per hour |
|
Quoted:
Trying to cross over from the bar/nightclub world to the realm of normal employment is amusing at times. I'm primarily looking for water resource jobs, but am casting a wider net since that market is pretty specific. One of my daily search terms is "research." This is my favorite research ad so far: Requirements:
Compensation : This will be an Hourly Position, see below for wage range
$14.00 – $18.00 per hour
Been going through the same shit myself. Mostly shit jobs that seems to be pushing me to the point of going back into retail. At least I can make decent money without playing the whole "We'll pay you minimum wage" game for recent college grads. Can't do that in my mid-30's. My colon can't survive a daily assault by ramen, again |
|
You are halfway to reaching an epiphany.
Perhaps you should research the Pay first, then use that information to decide what specific job to work toward. Sometimes you do have to pay your dues along the way, but if it's all part of your plan, it's easier to endure, temporarily. |
|
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? |
|
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? |
|
Quoted:
The classic high school guidance counselor question. It's also total bullshit. The things most people want to do don't translate well to getting a good job and there is no harder boss than yourself. Making your hobby your business rarely works out. Get skills/education and advance in your chosen field. You don't have to love it but you should at least not hate it. Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. |
|
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? Porn Star and Pimp. See? This is easy. Get out there and get started. Today is the first day, of the rest of your life! |
|
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up.
Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
Trying to cross over from the bar/nightclub world to the realm of normal employment is amusing at times. I'm primarily looking for water resource jobs, but am casting a wider net since that market is pretty specific. One of my daily search terms is "research." This is my favorite research ad so far: Requirements:
Compensation : This will be an Hourly Position, see below for wage range
$14.00 – $18.00 per hour |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
Are you Sirensong's secret troll account? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. I started a firearms business in 2013 because i love firearms. I made a bunch of money right off the bat but within two years i was so burnt out and hated every customer i came in contact with. Which is strange since i had been in the service industry for a decade before this. I hated gun customers, i hated their stupid fat faces bitching about "Blems" and all the stupid shit. I hated them bitching about lowers they could get cheaper through me after everything said and done, but the online price was $7.00 cheaper than my advertised instore price. It almost ruined my love of guns and i stopped buying for myself for almost a whole year. I got out of the business and magically my hobby interest returned. |
|
Quoted:
The classic high school guidance counselor question. It's also total bullshit. The things most people want to do don't translate well to getting a good job and there is no harder boss than yourself. Making your hobby your business rarely works out. Get skills/education and advance in your chosen field. You don't have to love it but you should at least not hate it. |
|
Quoted:
Are you Sirensong's secret troll account? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. I don't need to work at a hobby. I don't work to have fun. I work to get paid. |
|
Quoted:
Are you Sirensong's secret troll account? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes |
|
Quoted:
No, he was right. I started a firearms business in 2013 because i love firearms. I made a bunch of money right off the bat but within two years i was so burnt out and hated every customer i came in contact with. Which is strange since i had been in the service industry for a decade before this. I hated gun customers, i hated their stupid fat faces bitching about "Blems" and all the stupid shit. I hated them bitching about lowers they could get cheaper through me after everything said and done, but the online price was $7.00 cheaper than my advertised instore price. It almost ruined my love of guns and i stopped buying for myself for almost a whole year. I got out of the business and magically my hobby interest returned. I also got my FFL and became a kitchen table dealer, and that was my gravy money. I had plans to open a shop and become a full time gun dealer. Two years at my kitchen table cured my of my interest in opening a shop. With what has happened in the industry since then, abandoning that plan was a good move.
|
|
Quoted:
I saw one yesterday for a shipping and receiving INTERN. The min requirements were that you must be enrolled in a 4 year business school and be at least a sophomore and have at least 5 years experience in that kind of job. All to sit at a loading dock |
|
Quoted:
Managers want mediocre work just good enough to get by without landing in court or losing contracts. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes
|
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year.
|
|
Quoted:
You should move to Huntsville and get on SLS and have a mental breakdown with me. ![]() Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes ![]() I'd probably go to Melbourne if I need to live someplace even more hot and humid, and work under a crushing schedule. I'd need a significant pay bump. |
|
Quoted:
I am in a strange state of fairly low stress right now, and my field of fucks is becoming even more barren. I'm somewhere between the next bad meeting and 3 years from retirement. I'd probably go to Melbourne if I need to live someplace even more hot and humid, and work under a crushing schedule. I'd need a significant pay bump. Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes ![]() I'd probably go to Melbourne if I need to live someplace even more hot and humid, and work under a crushing schedule. I'd need a significant pay bump. |
|
Quoted:
My job is actually low stress (I'm a sub to BigB though). Watching the total bureaucratic dysfunction with horrible management and communication sprinkled in while they can't figure out why no one on the program stays more than 3-4 years before quitting is fun being on the outside looking in for the most part. Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes ![]() I'd probably go to Melbourne if I need to live someplace even more hot and humid, and work under a crushing schedule. I'd need a significant pay bump. You haven't seen bureaucratic until you've seen the Navy interference in the business in operation, under the guise of CDRL interpretation. |
|
Quoted:
No, he was right. I started a firearms business in 2013 because i love firearms. I made a bunch of money right off the bat but within two years i was so burnt out and hated every customer i came in contact with. Which is strange since i had been in the service industry for a decade before this. I hated gun customers, i hated their stupid fat faces bitching about "Blems" and all the stupid shit. I hated them bitching about lowers they could get cheaper through me after everything said and done, but the online price was $7.00 cheaper than my advertised instore price. It almost ruined my love of guns and i stopped buying for myself for almost a whole year. I got out of the business and magically my hobby interest returned. Let's just face it, shall we? Gun people kind of suck. Some are OK. Most? Are not. And you can ruin a good passion by starting a business in it. |
|
Quoted:
That's gotta be a typo. I was making well over $100k a year as a Capture Manager. Most proposal manager's make around $80k+. I've seen some places copy/paste the same description for both junior and senior level positions, hopefully that's the case here. I've also seen massive amount of "this is a junior level position but we require 5-7 years of experience with a technology that has only existed 6 months" |
|
Fixed.
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, you can work that job for 30 years with no chance of advancement while enjoying your 1%-3% yearly raise. |
|
Quoted:
There's an F-15 job that is probably still open, again, most people last 2 to 6 months, and the major reason is a "platinum" supplier that builds junk can't be brought to heel. Maybe the most famous are the double drilled holes that peeked out from under a fastener through the moldline. The supplier bought them off, so they are acceptable, and that's what they'll tell anyone that questions the quality. You haven't seen bureaucratic until you've seen the Navy interference in the business in operation, under the guise of CDRL interpretation. Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Putting all money aside, what is the one thing you'd like to do with the rest of your life? .
It's only bullshit, because you were too dense or too negative to figure out what it means. The point is, if you are starting out in a brand new career, then you have an opportunity to do something which motivates you more than anything else. That will lead to becoming the Best, and therefore valuable to an employer. Obviously, one should factor in Pay, benefits, lifestyle and Aptitude. Commonsense and good judgement and pragmatism apply. This isn't hypothetical. A lot of us here have achieved our dream job and make damned good money for doing what we want. It's still "work" but it beats the hell outa scraping out a living like 95% of the population. Most aren't qualified to understand the details, and don't care. Despite their parroting of the latest buzzwords and platitudes ![]() I'd probably go to Melbourne if I need to live someplace even more hot and humid, and work under a crushing schedule. I'd need a significant pay bump. You haven't seen bureaucratic until you've seen the Navy interference in the business in operation, under the guise of CDRL interpretation. I'm so burnt out of DoD/government work I'm trying to go work at Remington here if that tells you anything.Â
|
|
Requirements:Â Proven track record of successfully managing large proposal efforts in the federal government arena and an understanding of the federal sales cycle and federal procurement and acquisition process (including FAR) Â Do you know the in's and out's of the fedgov procurement aka have you ever done it before? Â This is about the onyl serious requirement. Â
Experience leading proposal teams in discussions on proposal win themes and other strategic messages  Meeting facilitator.  Exceptional written communication skills, including conveying technical information and complicated ideas into language and concepts easily understood by others, proper grammar and mechanics, and editing/revising skills Can you type a god damn email and have an ounce of professionalism Expert ability with MS Word, PowerPoint, Adobe Acrobat, and design software  Basic level computer skills. Demonstrated ability to improve company processes, develop resources, maintain consistent and timely communication with stakeholders, and manage multiple complex proposal efforts and teams simultaneously  Fancy terminology for "multi task #1".  Demonstrated ability to identify key components of an RFP and use them to develop a customized checklist, style manual, acronym list, and other tools to ensure compliance for each proposal effort  Put an excel spreadsheet together.  While I'll admit the pay sucks for some areas, there's not a ton that needs to go into this job.  This is a job that you know your company has...and when you meet who they hired, you read the description and say "How in the F did that person get the job!?".  Don't let fancy wording distract you from the simplicity of the job. |
|
Quoted:
Requirements: Proven track record of successfully managing large proposal efforts in the federal government arena and an understanding of the federal sales cycle and federal procurement and acquisition process (including FAR)  Do you know the in's and out's of the fedgov procurement aka have you ever done it before?  This is about the onyl serious requirement.  Experience leading proposal teams in discussions on proposal win themes and other strategic messages  Meeting facilitator.  Exceptional written communication skills, including conveying technical information and complicated ideas into language and concepts easily understood by others, proper grammar and mechanics, and editing/revising skills Can you type a god damn email and have an ounce of professionalism Expert ability with MS Word, PowerPoint, Adobe Acrobat, and design software  Basic level computer skills. Demonstrated ability to improve company processes, develop resources, maintain consistent and timely communication with stakeholders, and manage multiple complex proposal efforts and teams simultaneously  Fancy terminology for "multi task #1".  Demonstrated ability to identify key components of an RFP and use them to develop a customized checklist, style manual, acronym list, and other tools to ensure compliance for each proposal effort  Put an excel spreadsheet together.  While I'll admit the pay sucks for some areas, there's not a ton that needs to go into this job.  This is a job that you know your company has...and when you meet who they hired, you read the description and say "How in the F did that person get the job!?".  Don't let fancy wording distract you from the simplicity of the job. There is no fucking way I'd hire anyone for that price to do B&P work. |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
|
Quoted:
i'll take "guy who missed the point" for $200, alex. Quoted:
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. I took a $50,000 position to switch careers. The deal was that I'd work 45 minutes from home and get a raise after three months. Eight months later I just got the raise and I'm still working three hours from home, and the boss thinks I should be working 14-16 hours a day six days a week. Sorry, I don't want to spend 19 hours a day away from home for $10/hr. |
|
Quoted:
20 years ago people would have jumped at this as an entry level position to get: a foot in the door, an opportunity to prove themselves and gain skills, a chance to switch professions and a chance to work their way up. Now, whinny bitches want to start in a new career field with no skills or experience and start at $1000,000+ a year. |
.