Posted: 6/26/2011 1:58:59 PM EDT
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I say you leave the metal detectors, but always have them turned off. After someone passes through the metal detector, they sit down on this chair with a metal seat and chrome arm rests. This chair has some wires connected to it, and maybe an LED light or two. A rent a cop will sit at a computer screen behind the chair so no one can see what he's doing and type in some numbers when the person sits down. When the person sits down, the whole chair vibrates a little bit and blows a puff of air around them, then a light turns green and they can get up and go on their way. Every couple months a (fake) story will air about someone who was caught trying to smuggle a banana from brazil to the US, and his effort was thwarted by Maltose's wonder chair. I will be the sole manufacturer of this chair and I will make billions. Each member of this site will be able to buy 10 shares of stock in Maltose's wonder chair, INC at $0.01 before I go public.
The chair, however, does nothing. How effective do you think it would be? |
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My idea for a chair is to have it be the same size as an airplane seat. If they don't fit completely within the chair then they must purchase first class or a second seat. Or they must pay the passengers around them for the inconvenience if there are no extra seats available. Or they can't fly, and must go on a strict diet for the rest of their lives. Or the airlines can make bigger seats. |
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If I recall, weren't these scanners originally designed to measure troops to get the right size uniforms? Someone figured they could claim to see items with them, and Chertoff made millions from his shares of stock in the company...
So, yeah, useless, pretty much. 
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