Posted: 5/15/2009 6:18:10 PM EDT
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I just got off the phone with my neice. My neice is 21 and I never knew about her or her mother until late last year. The girls been rode hard, put away wet for entire time. Her mother is an alcoholic and possibly a drug user. My neice has been struggling but has been trying to put her life together. I've been more of a moral support to her, visiting her etc. None of this is really too terribly important to my problem. I'm just giving you insight.
Her call today was to inform me that she was nearly raped by her biological father. She has never had much contact with her bio Dad but while she's trying to get her act together she got in contact with him looking for supportive family. Anyway, I asked her if she reported the assualt and she said she called the cops and the cops told her that since nothing happened [ie she wasn't actually raped] that it would end up being worse for her than it would be for him. So she didn't report it. She say shes working with domestic voilence and is receiving counseling. Today [which spurred the call –– evidently she's been trying to call the past couple of weeks since the incident happened but hasn't been able to get ahold of me] she was at the bar with her Grandparents and her Grandfather assulted her bio father in the bar/resturant which of course upset her. I don't feel as if I have the entire picture. I can't believe any police officers would advise her not to press charges against the scum that did this to her [she has bruses from the assult visable]. I wouldn't think domestic voilence would do nothing either. Its just crazy. I'm not sure if there's anything that I can do but I thought I would see what you recommended. Patty |
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It doesn't make sense to me. She said she has bruises on her face from the assualt that even after two weeks show. I guess what I'm saying is that I'm not sure what to believe. It doesn't seem reasonable that a police officer would advise her not to report it if she indeed called the police right after it happened.
My reservations is because about a month ago she called me in tears. She over drew her checking account and needed to make rent and her car payment but couldn't because of NFS charges. I gave her some advice [I don't have any money to give her] on what to do to clear up the problem but every recommendation she shot down - it either wouldn't work or she tried it already her only way out of her hole was for me to give her money for her rent/car payment. I offered to go talk to her bank, land lord and car company but she declined and that was the end of that. I did see she called a couple of times in the past week or so but she usually calls back and I'm busy so I didn't take the time to call her. |
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Technically it is at it's base a domestic violence issue if there was physical injury, there are two types of relationships within the domestic violence envelope, affinity and consanguinity (law or blood). Uncle pervo is blood and if there is evidence of physical injury it is a mandatory arrest scenario (as long as it is immediately reported or damn near to) otherwise a statement is taken and a warrant is secured for arrest. At least here. Where is this.
Edit - she needs a sit down, if the responding decided not to play with the complaint then there may be something more here than is known. |
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It seems you feel you can trust this niece you never knew about until recently. Like you say, the whole story doesn't seem to be there. Some things don't make sense. Make sure it's not a family scam... think twice before parting with any significant sums of $$$ or enough to support a continuing drug habit.
From the limited info, it appears an assault occurred. I cannot tell why any LE would tell her not to file charges or make a report. She should still file the report, but understand some import may be lost due to the delay. Yes, it will most probably cost her more in emotions and time than it does him, but that is the way it goes. Family/legal issues are almost always a mess. It will add to her stress. She needs the support she has, and she needs to take it one day at a time. She needs to focus on getting herself squared away in mind and body. She can chase relatives later, she probably can't afford to play emotional roulette with an obviously jacked up family. Good luck to her and you. |
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Quoted:
Thank you everyone, I do not trust this girl. I think she wants to do well but has had very poor influence the majority of her life. I'm a big fan of trusting my gut, and if you gut is saying somethings not right, you might be closer to the "truth" than the version you are being told. I'm not saying this is the case here, but I have seen more than my share of "fictional" reports......... some people get behind the 8-ball and just get caught up in things. Something doesn't seem right if neither the police nor counseling services have pursued this matter. Just my .02 |