Posted: 12/10/2003 10:53:49 PM EDT
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Went past a religious stoe today the had a large sign in the fron that had " Bibles For ALL Occasions" I looked over to the wife and said "ALL?" I started to get the look of "you better not be thinking dirty" So I said how about a Bar Mitzva? She had no answer,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,for once. |
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Quoted: IIRC, there was a pub/bar in Naples, Florida that said on the side of the building in big bold letters you can't miss--- "FREE BEER TOMORROW!" We always laugh about that one from time to time. |
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Quoted: Went past a religious stoe today the had a large sign in the fron that had " Bibles For ALL Occasions" I looked over to the wife and said "ALL?" I started to get the look of "you better not be thinking dirty" So I said how about a Bar Mitzva? She had no answer,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,for once. Actually, the Jews read the Old Testament or at least the 1st 5 books..It's called the Torah (or is it the Talmud..I can't remember) I saw a sign and it said "We would rather do business with 1000 al qaeda(sp) than 1 American" It was on a mortuary door... |
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And the sign said "Long-haired freaky people need not apply" So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why He said "You look like a fine upstanding young man, I think you'll do" So I took off my hat, I said "Imagine that. Huh! Me workin' for you!" Whoa-oh-oh Sign, sign, everywhere a sign Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign? And the sign said anybody caught trespassin' would be shot on sight So I jumped on the fence and-a yelled at the house, "Hey! What gives you the right?" "To put up a fence to keep me out or to keep mother nature in" "If God was here he'd tell you to your face, Man, you're some kinda sinner" Sign, sign, everywhere a sign Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign? Now, hey you, mister, can't you read? You've got to have a shirt and tie to get a seat You can't even watch, no you can't eat You ain't supposed to be here The sign said you got to have a membership card to get inside Ugh! ------ lead guitar ------ And the sign said, "Everybody welcome. Come in, kneel down and pray" But when they passed around the plate at the end of it all, I didn't have a penny to pay So I got me a pen and a paper and I made up my own little sign I said, "Thank you, Lord, for thinkin' 'bout me. I'm alive and doin' fine." Wooo! Sign, sign, everywhere a sign Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign? Sign, sign, everywhere a sign Sign Sign, sign |