[ARCHIVED THREAD] - TSA.....unbeliveable (Page 1 of 3)
Posted: 6/12/2015 4:40:44 PM EDT
| Sitting here at Reagan getting ready to fly home. I just helped an African woman who was lost and trying to fly to Doha, Qatar. Turns out she's not flying out of Regan....she's flying out of Dulles. Now how the fuck did she get through security at Reagan with a boarding pass for Dulles? |
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I went through a body scanner and had the person monitoring the screen radio over "Check his right leg"
The brilliant TSA agent proceeded to pat down my left leg and let me go. I could have ankle carried a handgun past them if I wanted, because they don't know right from left. |
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One time on a trip to Dallas, I went up to the TSA counter to show them my boarding pass and my ID. The TSA agent said, "Sir, this is not you." I replied, "I've lost a lot of weight since my last driver's license" thinking nothing of the comment. She replied, "No sir, the license is for Mr. X (names protect for the less than innocent) but the boarding pass is for Mr. Y. So, we cannot let you through."
Her supervisor then walked up, and she explained everything to him. Apparently, my friend, Mr. Y had my boarding pass. The supervisor looked at me all sternly and in his best intimidating voice said, "Sir, I am going to have to ask you to explain how you come to be holding Mr. Y's boarding pass." I said, "I am flying with Mr. Y, and he has my boarding pass, and I have his." The supervisor said that I would have to get my boarding pass from Mr. Y. "But" I told the supervisor "he's already made it through the checkpoint." The supervisor said, getting upset, "Sir, that is impossible with my staff." I looked right in the eye and said "I be you $100 that's a crock of shit." Yeah, I was getting frustrated and was very hung over. Thinking he was a bad ass, he said "How are you going to prove it?" I stretched out my arm and pointed to my friend Mr. Y standing on the other side of the TSA check point. He made it through with my boarding pass and his license!! Laughing hysterically, as he had heard the whole thing, he walked up and presented me my boarding pass. The supervisor walked off, and the agent waived me through. But, we felt all kinds of safe that there were no terrorists on the plane. |
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What about bags? She's travelling to Qatar with just a carry on? Quoted:
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How did she get checked in?  Probably checked in online prior to going to the airport. What about bags? She's travelling to Qatar with just a carry on? Well, since women there only need one set of clothes.... |
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One time on a trip to Dallas, I went up to the TSA counter to show them my boarding pass and my ID. The TSA agent said, "Sir, this is not you." I replied, "I've lost a lot of weight since my last driver's license" thinking nothing of the comment. She replied, "No sir, the license is for Mr. X (names protect for the less than innocent) but the boarding pass is for Mr. Y. So, we cannot let you through." Her supervisor then walked up, and she explained everything to him. Apparently, my friend, Mr. Y had my boarding pass. The supervisor looked at me all sternly and in his best intimidating voice said, "Sir, I am going to have to ask you to explain how you come to be holding Mr. Y's boarding pass." I said, "I am flying with Mr. Y, and he has my boarding pass, and I have his." The supervisor said that I would have to get my boarding pass from Mr. Y. "But" I told the supervisor "he's already made it through the checkpoint." The supervisor said, getting upset, "Sir, that is impossible with my staff." I looked right in the eye and said "I be you $100 that's a crock of shit." Yeah, I was getting frustrated and was very hung over. Thinking he was a bad ass, he said "How are you going to prove it?" I stretched out my arm and pointed to my friend Mr. Y standing on the other side of the TSA check point. He made it through with my boarding pass and his license!! Laughing hysterically, as he had heard the whole thing, he walked up and presented me my boarding pass. The supervisor walked off, and the agent waived me through. But, we felt all kinds of safe that there were no terrorists on the plane. Good TSA phuc up story. |
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What about bags? She's travelling to Qatar with just a carry on? Quoted:
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How did she get checked in? Probably checked in online prior to going to the airport. What about bags? She's travelling to Qatar with just a carry on? No idea. All she had was her purse. |
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Sitting here at Reagan getting ready to fly home. I just helped an African woman who was lost and trying to fly to Doha, Qatar. Turns out she's not flying out of Regan....she's flying out of Dulles. Now how the fuck did she get through security at Reagan with a boarding pass for Dulles? 95% failure at detecting Red Team bombs and weapons. You're welcome, just keep the security fees and surcharges rolling in mmmmKay. |
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The same TSA that looked at my plaque from Korea and LOUDLY proclaimed to everyone within earshot that the empty inert 30MM round glued to it was a "OH HELL NAW HE GOT A MISSLE"... that TSA!? - Clint Yup. TSA in DC is a cultural immersion experience. You should see them do flips when I bright an mp5 through Reagan. Took a supervisor to talk them off the ledge. And yes, lots of "oh lawd"s going on. Pretty funny actually if it wasn't for the fact that these nimrods are a layer of security. Just a jobs program, nothing more. |
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IIRC, I just read an article about TSA having a 95% fail rate on security tests.
I have a coworker who used to work in a DEA task force while employed as a detective in Virginia. He said they were tasked once or twice a year to test security at the local airports, and they got guns and knives through every time and never got caught. |
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Ok now you're fucking trolling us  Quoted:
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Just got interesting. Someone just paged " Jack Mehoff"
I shit you not! I was standing talking to a young couple and we heard it over the PA. Guy said it once and then Ithink he realized he'd been had. Whole bunch of people were rolling. Also got stick on the tarmac for 1.5 hours before take off....joys of commuting by air. |
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My first and only time flying commercial was at roughly 6am in the Seatac (Seattle) Airport headed to Denver, then to Tennessee.
I arrived well dressed, well trimmed, with an OD pack and a rifle case. Had an AR15 and ammo. I asked for directions, as I was lost looking for the Frontier check in, and was promptly escorted, no questions asked, passed security to get on a plane to Okinawa.... with a hundred Marines. They thought I was .mil, and just whisked my on by. 
I HAD A FUCKING RIFLE AND AMMO WITH ME. |
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Sitting here at Reagan getting ready to fly home. I just helped an African woman who was lost and trying to fly to Doha, Qatar. Turns out she's not flying out of Regan....she's flying out of Dulles. Now how the fuck did she get through security at Reagan with a boarding pass for Dulles? None of your concerns make any sense, whatsoever. Anyone can print any boarding pass at any time. None of that has any bearing on the TSA.
Security is the same, regardless of which airport. They only check your boarding pass as a preliminary. I'm not a defender of the TSA by any means, but of all the things to bitch about, yours is the dumbest one I have ever heard since TSA was invented. |
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My first and only time flying commercial was at roughly 6am in the Seatac (Seattle) Airport headed to Denver, then to Tennessee. I arrived well dressed, well trimmed, with an OD pack and a rifle case. Had an AR15 and ammo. I asked for directions, as I was lost looking for the Frontier check in, and was promptly escorted, no questions asked, passed security to get on a plane to Okinawa.... with a hundred Marines. They thought I was .mil, and just whisked my on by.
I HAD A FUCKING RIFLE AND AMMO WITH ME. 
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That's been my experience in Atlanta, Boston, and Manchester, NH...some of you guys are real shit magnets! Quoted:
Went through Atlanta couple weeks ago no one from TSA even looked up at me. That's been my experience in Atlanta, Boston, and Manchester, NH...some of you guys are real shit magnets! Sorry, but ATL is the only place where they told me to handle each of my guns and show them they were clear. Open the case, remove the firearm, show us there isn't a bullet in the chamber. |
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Guys, she showed him her boarding pass for a connecting flight... Are you guys missing this? Highly unlikely that she would have a connecting flight from Reagan to Dulles. Even at the worst of 66 traffic they are only about an hour's drive away from each other. If the boarding pass said Dulles to Doha, she was in the wrong place. |