[ARCHIVED THREAD] - The Divorce Disaster thread (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 5/13/2012 1:23:26 PM EDT
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I recently got dumped by a girl I'd been dating since July. I'd started thinking about a ring. Now, she's still a good girl... She's just retired as a USAF officer and got a sweet job working for a major manufacturer. She owns her own home, car, motorcycle, and jetskis. Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children.
Having said that, I miss her an awful lot. To console me, tell me the worst divorce stories you've experienced or heard. Every time I read one of those, I smile when I think about my gun collection and my fleet of 6 motorcycles, and my ATV and my very low debt levels. I was inspired to start this thread by this other thread... http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_5/1321875_I_have_my_wifes_freeloading_brother_sleeping_on_my_couch_.html&page=1 |
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Those statements are incongruent.
Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png Well, she's not nutso. |
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I'm reminded of this story from baseops.net... (NOT written by N_T, who still hangs out there)
Once upon a time a pilot found a beautiful princess and asked her, "Will you marry me?"
The princess said, "No!" And the pilot lived happily ever after and flew jets all over the world and drove hot cars and chased skinny long-legged big-breasted flight attendants and hunted and fished and went to topless bars and dated women half his age and drank Weihenstephaner German beer and Captain Morgan and never heard bitching and never paid child support or alimony and kept his house and guns and ate cold leftover meals, potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was frickin' cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up........ The end. It's followed by this story... Until one day our fearless adventurer went to the club to have a drink, and while there he met a very fair, yet older damsel who offered to buy him a cocktail. The young pilot was flattered and took the drink. The attractive older woman sat down and flirted with our intrepid pilot who politely resisted. After a few more adult beverages the woman said, if you are not interested in me how would you like to try a sportsman's double? Our young pilot innocently asked, what's that?
The woman said that's a threesome with a mother and daughter. The pilot quickly asked for the check and drove the kind, older woman to her apartment... And as they the walked in the door the woman yelled, Mom are you still up?! The end? |
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She either chooses poorly, or is the poor choice herself. You are in a better position to judge the truth than random dudes (like me) posting comments on hobby-centric forum. Something's up - either with her or you.
PS. Don't base you judgements about a person on their apparent financial success. Lots of messed up people out there are able to compartmentalize the crazy w/o it bleeding over into other areas of their lives. Still doesn't mitigate the personality d/o (or whatever). I've worked with/around some very successful head-cases. 
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She either chooses poorly, or is the poor choice herself. You are in a better position to judge the truth than random dudes (like me) posting comments on hobby-centric forum. Something's up - either with her or you. PS. Don't base you judgements about a person on their apparent financial success. Lots of messed up people out there are able to compartmentalize the crazy w/o it bleeding over into other areas of their lives. Still doesn't mitigate the personality d/o (or whatever). I've worked with/around some very successful head-cases. Well, long distance isn't good for a relationship, particularly with no convergence vector for our lives in the next 24 to 36 months. Ok, i totally forgot the rules. If this thread hits 5 pages, I'll post pics. |
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Those statements are incongruent.
Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png Well, she's not nutso. Lol... She's female... Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Those statements are incongruent.
Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png Well, she's not nutso. Lol... She's female... Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile Ok, valid rebuttal sir. Damnit, this thread isn't supposed to be about my own relationship failings! Give me yours so that I can feel better about my own! 
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Those statements are incongruent.
Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png In 100% agreement with the "RED FLAG" post. You are only fooling yourself if you fall for that. Don't find out the hard way! Plenty of other women out there. |
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Quoted: First post wins.Quoted: Those statements are incongruent.Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png |
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Its been said, "If you love somebody, let them go, if they don't return, count your fucking blessings because you just saved yourself a lifetime of misery.".
I wouldn't sweat some broad dumping you. Believe me, I cut bait plenty of times when I realized what a cunt the woman I was dating or about date was. Just chalk it up to experience. |
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Quoted: Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though You are starting to sound like the some of the others here that swear they know their spouse "has always been loyal and faithful to them and would never cheat". They want to believe it so bad that the phrase "Love is blind" applies to them. The truth is only the partner knows if they really have it together or have been faithful. Your personal feelings about someone have no affect on what someone else may or might have done. History is full of examples of people saying one things but doing another. You haven't known this girl for even a year and you think you know her? While it is possible for it to work there is nothing that says you really know the true her. To answer your question about a marriage disaster... I know my wife a year and a half before asking her. Things were going well, I thought I had observed her true character, I had looked into her background, and believed she would be the most loyal and faithful person on the planet for me. We got married 2 years after we had met. A couple months after the wedding she quit her regular job and started babysitting. Clearly it didn't pay the same and she lost her health insurance so I had to add her to mine. Then she couldn't pay her bills, so I had to start helping her. The plan had always been she would help with some of the household bills. Not only was that not going to happen but now she became an unexpected expense which put more stress on me. My job at the time was hell, people wanting my position so they could move up in the company and were doing everything they could to get me fired. Did I have a loving spouse to fall back on? Nope, I had a spouse that slept all day, had anxiety attacks, and only added stress to my life. We were married September, by Thanksgiving things were bad enough that she didn't travel with me to see my family. By April things were already in crisis mode and we started marriage counselling. It was going ok until the counsellor started talking about things my spouse needed to work on. Then she threw a fit, walked out of counselling, and never came back. A few weeks later she "went to her mom's for a week" and never came back. The night after she left I couldn't sleep, my heart was racing, and visions of her hooking up with someone else kept popping into my head. I dismissed them because I knew my wife and should is the last person on the planet that would think of cheating. Weeks after she left my friends were asking me if it was possible there was someone else and I staunchly defended her and said no way. Well a month after she had left I get access to information that proved that I had been nothing but a fool blinded by love. She had been sleeping with someone else, in fact it started the night I couldn't sleep. Then apparently she had shown some feelings for her so he kicked her ass to the curb. That just made her want him more, to the point she was begging him and would let him do all sorts of things to her. (for you guys that want proof of your ex cheating, be careful what you wish for. The details of some of the messages I read have been seared into my brain and no matter how much I try to forget them I can't) He wasn't having any it and was just using her. Once I had the proof I called her on it. She broke down of course and said she was sorry but she wouldn't come back home. Worse yet she kept defending the guy saying how good of a guy he was and I should leave him out of it. I gave her a year to come back and work things out. That is a year of my life that I wasted and will never get back. Remember this is the woman that I thought was the most loyal and faithful woman on the planet for me. So I didn't just want to walk away. Looking back I should have just filed for divorce right then and their and saved myself all the misery. Christmas came and while she still wasn't home with me she did agree to travel with me to see my family. I picked her up, she got in the car and took some pills, then 10 minutes later she was nearly passed out. It concerned me enough that I stopped the car to check on her. We travelled half way to my parents and stopped at a hotel. She said she wanted to call her parents and tell them she made it to the hotel. Then she went into the bathroom, locked the door, turned on the fan, turned on the water, and made 2 phone calls. As she came out of the bathroom she said she had to text her parents that she made it to the hotel. WTF. She took more pills and passed out. I grabbed the phone, looked at the 2 numbers she called, paid for a reverse cellphone look up and found out they belonged to the guy she had started having the affair with 7 months ago!!!! I was pissed. Woke her up. Of course she turned it around on me that I was violating her privacy and it was all my fault. She called her parents to come get her and I left her at the hotel to continue on alone. So one Christmas Eve, while travelling with me to see my family, in an attempt to work through this, she calls the guy she started the affair with. Mother Fucking Bitch! This from the person who I thought was most loyal and faithful woman on the planet for me. I calmed down a bit and continued to give her a chance to do things on her end to change. She didn't. So a couple months after that I started the divorce paperwork and let her know. I figured that might snap some reality into the situation for her. Nope. Then comes news that didn't suprise me. She was being charged with 3 felonies for trying to obtain prescription pain pills. I think the laws are a bit overboard on this, say your doctor gives you a pain pill for an injury and you go to the dentist to have some work done and don't tell them you have a prescription for pain pills...felony. Any way her whole life got thrown under the bus. The pain pill addiction is responsible for some of the changes in her behavior. But clearly she is not the person I thought she was a year and a half into dating. Part of the court supervision program she got into was random drug testing, so I'm guessing she got clean. Years later she still babysits and supposedly works another job. She has a kid and I'm guessing she doesn't know who the father is because she claims she doesn't want any child support from him. All I can say is that I'm glad I'm no longer a part of that mess. So as I said in another thread, I find it hilarious that people speak for the spouses faithful or having it all together. All the feelings I had didn't mean anything. Being blinded by love just caused me to ignore warning signs that I should have spotted earlier. The other person is going to do what they want no matter what you feel towards them. I would also caution anyone on getting married until you really know the person and have gone to see a regular consellor who can grill you about each other so that you really do understand the other person before not after the wedding. Obviously I went into a very dark place after everything I thought I know was turned upside down and destroyed. I started seeing a counsellor who has me if I had discussed a whole range of topics with my ex before getting married. The answer to almost all of them were no. I thought I knew her, things were working, so what else was there but to get married. Very bad move on my place. One question was "what will happen if one you get sick and can't work". If you don't have a plan ahead of time it isn't very likely that you will come up with a good plan under stress if that situation happens. Years later and I'm still getting my life back. I'm doing better now than I ever have and things are going well. I figured it would take about 5 years to get back to where I was before I got married and it's been 4.5. To the OP, if she has been married twice before and then dumped you, just move on. Why fight to make something work with someone who won't return the effort. In the end it did no good in my story anyway. |
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It's a damned shame they cant be the ones to lose it all.................seems like the courts are geared to assist them
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Lost a house a 20 acres, two cars and am now living in an apartment. No alimony, no child support. Best fucking thing I've ever done ! |
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Quoted: Quoted: Those statements are incongruent.Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png +1. You just may not have realized it yet, OP.
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Ok try this one.
Married a girl when I was 21 she was 18. Soon after the fighting started. She was a high school dropout with no job...but I didnt care I was young and really fucking stupid. And she was crazy in the sack...that helped. But then I deployed...and then she cheated, but I didnt find out right away. No I came home to more fighting, more lazy sack of shit wife. Then one fight after I slammed her for being the epic piece of shit she really was, she drops the bomb that she had been doinking a soldier while I was deployed (she didnt even have the courtesy to keep it in the Corps!  ). So I ordered her out of my house....but then the police informed me that if I kicked her out I would go to jail for abandonment. So I let her stay there for 3 months to get her shit out while I moved into the Barracks, while there I was under strict orders not to even go to bars and hit on chicks because I could be potentially lined up for Adultery Charges under the UCMJ. So I locked myself in my room and proceded to keep the Jack Daniels company in black ink. All the while she destroyed the house to the tune of $5,000 in damages, Mold, dog shit on the carpet, destroyed walls and doors...all billed to me. I ended up having to give her $1,000 to get an apartment so she could get the fuck out on the third month anyway, but that was before I knew about the damage.
Then I found out that the state required a 1 year waiting period before I could file any divorce papers, giving her rights to half my paycheck for that entire time. So I filed for divorce in my home state which was instant (dodged a bullet there). So I decided to do anything that would make her agree to it, including $5,000 in alimony over a year and $3,000 up front so she could move back home, but after the hearing ($1,200 to Lawyer and $250 to the Court) she had her family go to the courthouse and take the papers before I could file them, which was legal....  ....then I get a call from her demanding "Spousal Support" There was that bullet I thought I dodged. This bitch was just so hell bent on getting anything from me that she could, and im not tooting my own horn here but I was a good-ish husband, her shit was just plain uncalled for. So after some quick thinking I decided to do the first dishonest thing I had done the entire time...I decided to lie my ass off and bluff the bitch. I told her that I was suing the courthouse for being retards and that they in turn were going to hunt down the person who took my papers, that they had left a signature in a logbook and his face on video. I told her that if I didnt get the papers back I was going to have her family member (Her Dad) thrown in jail and she was going along with them.
I got the papers back. But still had to pay the $8,000 to her. But I got my divorce. In the end I lost rifles, pistols, tons of gear and my Trans Am. All just to pay to get that bitch out of my life. 
But you know what. Damned if 3 months after my divorce I got woken up by the barracks duty at midnight on Valentines day because one of my Marines needed to go to the hospital. I spent 7 hours with him that night, and I met my current wife who is an RN, who isnt a lazy piece of shit, who doesnt cheat on me and who in much more fun in...nevermind I'll get hurt for throwing that in. But here is the required pic of my new wife. 
Moral of the story. If she thinks she can do better I would just let it roll off your back, before your thousands of dollars in debt eating Raman noodles living in the barracks having to bum rides everywhere because you had to sell everything worth anything to pay just to get that bitch out of your life. Hope that helps! |
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Ok try this one. Married a girl when I was 21 she was 18. Soon after the fighting started. She was a high school dropout with no job...but I didnt care I was young and really fucking stupid. And she was crazy in the sack...that helped. But then I deployed...and then she cheated, but I didnt find out right away. No I came home to more fighting, more lazy sack of shit wife. Then one fight after I slammed her for being the epic piece of shit she really was, she drops the bomb that she had been doinking a soldier while I was deployed (she didnt even have the courtesy to keep it in the Corps! ). So I ordered her out of my house....but then the police informed me that if I kicked her out I would go to jail for abandonment. So I let her stay there for 3 months to get her shit out while I moved into the Barracks, while there I was under strict orders not to even go to bars and hit on chicks because I could be potentially lined up for Adultery Charges under the UCMJ. So I locked myself in my room and proceded to keep the Jack Daniels company in black ink. All the while she destroyed the house to the tune of $5,000 in damages, Mold, dog shit on the carpet, destroyed walls and doors...all billed to me. I ended up having to give her $1,000 to get an apartment so she could get the fuck out on the third month anyway, but that was before I knew about the damage.
Then I found out that the state required a 1 year waiting period before I could file any divorce papers, giving her rights to half my paycheck for that entire time. So I filed for divorce in my home state which was instant (dodged a bullet there). So I decided to do anything that would make her agree to it, including $5,000 in alimony over a year and $3,000 up front so she could move back home, but after the hearing ($1,200 to Lawyer and $250 to the Court) she had her family go to the courthouse and take the papers before I could file them, which was legal.... ....then I get a call from her demanding "Spousal Support" There was that bullet I thought I dodged. This bitch was just so hell bent on getting anything from me that she could, and im not tooting my own horn here but I was a good-ish husband, her shit was just plain uncalled for. So after some quick thinking I decided to do the first dishonest thing I had done the entire time...I decided to lie my ass off and bluff the bitch. I told her that I was suing the courthouse for being retards and that they in turn were going to hunt down the person who took my papers, that they had left a signature in a logbook and his face on video. I told her that if I didnt get the papers back I was going to have her family member (Her Dad) thrown in jail and she was going along with them.
I got the papers back. But still had to pay the $8,000 to her. But I got my divorce. In the end I lost rifles, pistols, tons of gear and my Trans Am. All just to pay to get that bitch out of my life. http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/4/361/3341/38401670001_large.jpg But you know what. Damned if 3 months after my divorce I got woken up by the barracks duty at midnight on Valentines day because one of my Marines needed to go to the hospital. I spent 7 hours with him that night, and I met my current wife who is an RN, who isnt a lazy piece of shit, who doesnt cheat on me and who in much more fun in...nevermind I'll get hurt for throwing that in. But here is the required pic of my new wife. http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e77/cschroeder86/Untitled.jpg Moral of the story. If she thinks she can do better I would just let it roll off your back, before your thousands of dollars in debt eating Raman noodles living in the barracks having to bum rides everywhere because you had to sell everything worth anything to pay just to get that bitch out of your life. Hope that helps! I don't know it that helped the OP but it sure helped me !!
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Ok try this one. Married a girl when I was 21 she was 18. Soon after the fighting started. She was a high school dropout with no job...but I didnt care I was young and really fucking stupid. And she was crazy in the sack...that helped. But then I deployed...and then she cheated, but I didnt find out right away. No I came home to more fighting, more lazy sack of shit wife. Then one fight after I slammed her for being the epic piece of shit she really was, she drops the bomb that she had been doinking a soldier while I was deployed (she didnt even have the courtesy to keep it in the Corps! ). So I ordered her out of my house....but then the police informed me that if I kicked her out I would go to jail for abandonment. So I let her stay there for 3 months to get her shit out while I moved into the Barracks, while there I was under strict orders not to even go to bars and hit on chicks because I could be potentially lined up for Adultery Charges under the UCMJ. So I locked myself in my room and proceded to keep the Jack Daniels company in black ink. All the while she destroyed the house to the tune of $5,000 in damages, Mold, dog shit on the carpet, destroyed walls and doors...all billed to me. I ended up having to give her $1,000 to get an apartment so she could get the fuck out on the third month anyway, but that was before I knew about the damage.
Then I found out that the state required a 1 year waiting period before I could file any divorce papers, giving her rights to half my paycheck for that entire time. So I filed for divorce in my home state which was instant (dodged a bullet there). So I decided to do anything that would make her agree to it, including $5,000 in alimony over a year and $3,000 up front so she could move back home, but after the hearing ($1,200 to Lawyer and $250 to the Court) she had her family go to the courthouse and take the papers before I could file them, which was legal.... ....then I get a call from her demanding "Spousal Support" There was that bullet I thought I dodged. This bitch was just so hell bent on getting anything from me that she could, and im not tooting my own horn here but I was a good-ish husband, her shit was just plain uncalled for. So after some quick thinking I decided to do the first dishonest thing I had done the entire time...I decided to lie my ass off and bluff the bitch. I told her that I was suing the courthouse for being retards and that they in turn were going to hunt down the person who took my papers, that they had left a signature in a logbook and his face on video. I told her that if I didnt get the papers back I was going to have her family member (Her Dad) thrown in jail and she was going along with them.
I got the papers back. But still had to pay the $8,000 to her. But I got my divorce. In the end I lost rifles, pistols, tons of gear and my Trans Am. All just to pay to get that bitch out of my life. http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/4/361/3341/38401670001_large.jpg But you know what. Damned if 3 months after my divorce I got woken up by the barracks duty at midnight on Valentines day because one of my Marines needed to go to the hospital. I spent 7 hours with him that night, and I met my current wife who is an RN, who isnt a lazy piece of shit, who doesnt cheat on me and who in much more fun in...nevermind I'll get hurt for throwing that in. But here is the required pic of my new wife. http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e77/cschroeder86/Untitled.jpg Moral of the story. If she thinks she can do better I would just let it roll off your back, before your thousands of dollars in debt eating Raman noodles living in the barracks having to bum rides everywhere because you had to sell everything worth anything to pay just to get that bitch out of your life. Hope that helps! 
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My best friend is 37, she has been divorced at least 3 times and is probably not going to find a hubby soon. She is 100% military disabled with PTSD and serious injuries.
I'm 70 in excellent shape and health and we do much together. Her first marriage lasted a month and when she was injured and in the hospital for 6 months he divorced her. Her second lasted 10 years and two kids, he was arrested for drug smuggling and she was on Federal Protection program for a year, she got the kids. The third was to an Army Captain who failed to mention that his mother had deep sixed two previous marriages and did the same this time by telling her that the kids would 'never' be her grand kids and the idiot husband let his Mom get away with statements like that. She was near suicide when a Chaplain friend and I decided to save her. It is working and she is recovering but what I'm going through is interesting. Count your blessings. |
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Jesus, yet another attention whoring thread intended solely to elicit woman bashing by the pathologically dysfunctional, socially inept bumblefucks in the GD cheapseats.
Jane Quoted:
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Well, long distance isn't good for a relationship, particularly with no convergence vector for our lives in the next 24 to 36 months. Ok, i totally forgot the rules. If this thread hits 5 pages, I'll post pics. I think I can help that happen. You owe me. 
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I recently got dumped by a girl I'd been dating since July. I'd started thinking about a ring. Now, she's still a good girl... She's just retired as a USAF officer and got a sweet job working for a major manufacturer. She owns her own home, car, motorcycle, and jetskis. Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Having said that, I miss her an awful lot. To console me, tell me the worst divorce stories you've experienced or heard. Every time I read one of those, I smile when I think about my gun collection and my fleet of 6 motorcycles, and my ATV and my very low debt levels. I was inspired to start this thread by this other thread... http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_5/1321875_I_have_my_wifes_freeloading_brother_sleeping_on_my_couch_.html&page=1 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 F5 |
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Growing old by yourself doesn't sound fun, I've been happily married for 16 years, marriage takes work, sacrifice and emotional strength, unfortunately these things are very rare in BOTH sexes these days.
My family has been in the funeral business since 1865, we know death, life is only the experiences you have. |
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Growing old by yourself doesn't sound fun, I've been happily married for 16 years, marriage takes work, sacrifice and emotional strength, unfortunately these things are very rare in BOTH sexes these days. My family has been in the funeral business since 1865, we know death, life is only the experiences you have. I'd add honesty to that list Oliver. |
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this. Quoted: Quoted: Those statements are incongruent.Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png |
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Jesus, yet another attention whoring thread intended solely to elicit woman bashing by the pathologically dysfunctional, socially inept bumblefucks in the GD cheapseats. Jane A guy gets dumped, is going through a rough emotional time, comes to people he can relate to in order to better understand his upside down emotional state, and all you can do is bash him. People here are talking about their own personal experiences. You on the otherhand are bashing someone you have had no interaction with. Stay classy Jane. |
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Jesus, yet another attention whoring thread intended solely to elicit woman bashing by the pathologically dysfunctional, socially inept bumblefucks in the GD cheapseats. Jane A guy gets dumped, is going through a rough emotional time, comes to people he can relate to in order to better understand his upside down emotional state, and all you can do is bash him. People here are talking about their own personal experiences. You on the otherhand are bashing someone you have had no interaction with. Stay classy Jane. Jane hates it when men speak the truth about women. Upsets her to the core. |
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Jesus, yet another attention whoring thread intended solely to elicit woman bashing by the pathologically dysfunctional, socially inept bumblefucks in the GD cheapseats. Jane A guy gets dumped, is going through a rough emotional time, comes to people he can relate to in order to better understand his upside down emotional state, and all you can do is bash him. People here are talking about their own personal experiences. You on the otherhand are bashing someone you have had no interaction with. Stay classy Jane. In order to live up to Jane's stereotype, I shall post this... 
Now, the reality is I know I've got some shortcomings. I'm tall, smart, handsome, financially stable with a job I love, humble, and a generally pleasant person to be around, but the truth is I'm 37 years old and still single. Clearly I'm doing something wrong. |
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Jesus, yet another attention whoring thread intended solely to elicit woman bashing by the pathologically dysfunctional, socially inept bumblefucks in the GD cheapseats. Jane A guy gets dumped, is going through a rough emotional time, comes to people he can relate to in order to better understand his upside down emotional state, and all you can do is bash him. People here are talking about their own personal experiences. You on the otherhand are bashing someone you have had no interaction with. Stay classy Jane. In order to live up to Jane's stereotype, I shall post this... https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/547224_226101154167860_112551815522795_383986_1216635792_n.jpg Now, the reality is I know I've got some shortcomings. I'm tall, smart, handsome, financially stable with a job I love, humble, and a generally pleasant person to be around, but the truth is I'm 37 years old and still single. Clearly I'm doing something wrong. Maybe you just haven't found the right woman yet. |
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Growing old by yourself doesn't sound fun, I've been happily married for 16 years, marriage takes work, sacrifice and emotional strength, unfortunately these things are very rare in BOTH sexes these days. My family has been in the funeral business since 1865, we know death, life is only the experiences you have. I'd add honesty to that list Oliver. You have to be real sober and practical minded when you pick a wife. I hire people at work, highly trained engineers. The key thing I look for is the natural inborn desire to work hard and do well. Either the person has it or they don't. You cannot change people. You cannot make a slacker into a good employee. It's the same thing with getting married. Both the people in the marriage have to be extremely mature and level headed and they have to be disgustingly nice or it's not going to work out. If your wife doesn't have a neat home now, then you'll never be able to turn her into a neat person. If she's not hardworking now, then she'll always be lazy If she's not taking care of herself now, she's not going to do it once she's married. The amazing thing about marraige is that Instead of being smart about picking a wife, a lot of guys marry a openly spoiled, selfish slob that gives them shit 24/7. Then they post up on the internet about how they endured some nightmare of abuse from some random, chubby slob. For no reason at all. If i was going to endure some soul-crushing nightmare of misery and betrayal, the girl would have to look like playmate of the year. At least I'd have a consolation prize. |
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Both people can be great people...however completely incompatible, or the marriage can fail for some other reason.
Failure of first marriages run at around 50%. I was sceptical about this figure and did took a sample size right off of AR15. Sure enough...it runs at about 50%. Over 60% for 2nd marriages and 70% for 3rd marriages. I was also curious about people who were still married: were they happy? So I polled for that..half of those still married were unhappy. Since only one of the spouses answered the poll...I was getting "half" the answer. Most Divorces (70%) are initiated by women, also most marriages are really initiated by women pressuring men into proposing. Why is this so? If one goes to the US Census Bureau and the Labor Department, statistics are readily available on what percentage of men and women are getting alimony, and child support. For the past 20 years the stats have changed very little and only now are really beginning to budge. For the most part: family courts are heavily biased against males. If they weren't then the spouse getting primary physical custody would be more evenly split. Also women are paying more alimony, due to the fact that more women are going to college than men. (Thank you Feminists for screwing up education for boys). So..that is the reality. One can also make Business Case Analysis...its actually cheaper to hire a housekeeper who'll cook and clean than have a wife. If one kept sex down to once a week (this is a national average) having a hooker is cheaper if one is making above 80K per year. So who tends to be happier in a marriage? The guy. Why? I think it's just the way we are hardwired, women are always on the lookout for a "better deal". A Donald Trump or Brad Pitt....or some sort of cheaper approximation...Why? Well...in spite of women being more emotional.. it's the way they are hardwired. Women tend to be emotional on the outside but very calculating and practical minded on the inside. The opposite is true for men. (Generally speaking that is). My marriage was horrible, but I had a beautiful (but challenging at times) divorce. I was also very lucky to come out of it relatively unscathed. It has been 5 years now...and I am still trying to recover financially. I think in about 10-15 years...I will finally get back to where I was financially before the divorce. It might not seem like it...but OP...you need to celebrate. You had a close call. I've dated a lot of women since my divorce. In my humble experience I found about 15% of them to be decent, the rest were bad apples. (California girls...) The only thing that keeps me from falling into the abyss of misery created by marriage...is that I am planning on sailing the world after I retire.. (my bucket list dictates it). Women for the most part would kill that dream of mine, so I keep my distance from them in any relationship that I stumble into. Most women want to live on land, where they can cheat when their husband is away...working. Or just go shopping at the mall, and hang out with their girlfriends. Put them on a boat with a guy 24/7...where they can't hide things easily (skimming money, cheating with the pool boy, etc) and they are not happy campers. |
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Both people can be great people...however completely incompatible, or the marriage can fail for some other reason. Failure of first marriages run at around 50%. I was sceptical about this figure and did took a sample size right off of AR15. Sure enough...it runs at about 50%. Over 60% for 2nd marriages and 70% for 3rd marriages. I was also curious about people who were still married: were they happy? So I polled for that..half of those still married were unhappy. Since only one of the spouses answered the poll...I was getting "half" the answer. Most Divorces (70%) are initiated by women, also most marriages are really initiated by women pressuring men into proposing. Why is this so? If one goes to the US Census Bureau and the Labor Department, statistics are readily available on what percentage of men and women are getting alimony, and child support. For the past 20 years the stats have changed very little and only now are really beginning to budge. For the most part: family courts are heavily biased against males. If they weren't then the spouse getting primary physical custody would be more evenly split. Also women are paying more alimony, due to the fact that more women are going to college than men. (Thank you Feminists for screwing up education for boys). So..that is the reality. One can also make Business Case Analysis...its actually cheaper to hire a housekeeper who'll cook and clean than have a wife. If one kept sex down to once a week (this is a national average) having a hooker is cheaper if one is making above 80K per year. So who tends to be happier in a marriage? The guy. Why? I think it's just the way we are hardwired, women are always on the lookout for a "better deal". A Donald Trump or Brad Pitt....or some sort of cheaper approximation...Why? Well...in spite of women being more emotional.. it's the way they are hardwired. Women tend to be emotional on the outside but very calculating and practical minded on the inside. The opposite is true for men. (Generally speaking that is). My marriage was horrible, but I had a beautiful (but challenging at times) divorce. I was also very lucky to come out of it relatively unscathed. It has been 5 years now...and I am still trying to recover financially. I think in about 10-15 years...I will finally get back to where I was financially before the divorce. It might not seem like it...but OP...you need to celebrate. You had a close call. I've dated a lot of women since my divorce. In my humble experience I found about 15% of them to be decent, the rest were bad apples. (California girls...) The only thing that keeps me from falling into the abyss of misery created by marriage...is that I am planning on sailing the world after I retire.. (my bucket list dictates it). Women for the most part would kill that dream of mine, so I keep my distance from them in any relationship that I stumble into. Most women want to live on land, where they can cheat when their husband is away...working. Or just go shopping at the mall, and hang out with their girlfriends. Put them on a boat with a guy 24/7...where they can't hide things easily (skimming money, cheating with the pool boy, etc) and they are not happy campers. You should definitely stay single. |
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Both people can be great people...however completely incompatible, or the marriage can fail for some other reason. Failure of first marriages run at around 50%. I was sceptical about this figure and did took a sample size right off of AR15. Sure enough...it runs at about 50%. Over 60% for 2nd marriages and 70% for 3rd marriages. I was also curious about people who were still married: were they happy? So I polled for that..half of those still married were unhappy. Since only one of the spouses answered the poll...I was getting "half" the answer. Most Divorces (70%) are initiated by women, also most marriages are really initiated by women pressuring men into proposing. Why is this so? If one goes to the US Census Bureau and the Labor Department, statistics are readily available on what percentage of men and women are getting alimony, and child support. For the past 20 years the stats have changed very little and only now are really beginning to budge. For the most part: family courts are heavily biased against males. If they weren't then the spouse getting primary physical custody would be more evenly split. Also women are paying more alimony, due to the fact that more women are going to college than men. (Thank you Feminists for screwing up education for boys). So..that is the reality. One can also make Business Case Analysis...its actually cheaper to hire a housekeeper who'll cook and clean than have a wife. If one kept sex down to once a week (this is a national average) having a hooker is cheaper if one is making above 80K per year. So who tends to be happier in a marriage? The guy. Why? I think it's just the way we are hardwired, women are always on the lookout for a "better deal". A Donald Trump or Brad Pitt....or some sort of cheaper approximation...Why? Well...in spite of women being more emotional.. it's the way they are hardwired. Women tend to be emotional on the outside but very calculating and practical minded on the inside. The opposite is true for men. (Generally speaking that is). My marriage was horrible, but I had a beautiful (but challenging at times) divorce. I was also very lucky to come out of it relatively unscathed. It has been 5 years now...and I am still trying to recover financially. I think in about 10-15 years...I will finally get back to where I was financially before the divorce. It might not seem like it...but OP...you need to celebrate. You had a close call. I've dated a lot of women since my divorce. In my humble experience I found about 15% of them to be decent, the rest were bad apples. (California girls...) The only thing that keeps me from falling into the abyss of misery created by marriage...is that I am planning on sailing the world after I retire.. (my bucket list dictates it). Women for the most part would kill that dream of mine, so I keep my distance from them in any relationship that I stumble into. Most women want to live on land, where they can cheat when their husband is away...working. Or just go shopping at the mall, and hang out with their girlfriends. Put them on a boat with a guy 24/7...where they can't hide things easily (skimming money, cheating with the pool boy, etc) and they are not happy campers. You should definitely stay single. Only idiots / retards get married anymore. <––––-Married. Would never, ever do it again. The next (newer) Gererations are forgoing marriage entirely having learned from the fathers mistakes. |
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Those statements are incongruent.
Trust me. She's got it together. She was divorced twice previously though and has no children. Once, maybe. Twice and no kids? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Red_flag_II.svg/250px-Red_flag_II.svg.png You dodged a bullet dude. Divorced twice probably means she makes some pretty bad decisions. |
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OP, don't forget that this thread is being written by a bunch of guys who, let's face it, fucked up royally.
To be fair, being married is tricky, and most guys get married when they are young and don't know shit about anything. But in the long run: "The proof of the pudding is in the tasting thereof." There was some rich guy who sold his wife's wedding dress on ebay, had this real long list of complaints that were supposed to be funny. Basically, it was obvious that the guy married the biggest piece of shit on the earth and put up with her abuse for a few years until he hated her guts. I don't really see how a guy can blame the institution of marriage because his worthless low-life sleezebag harpie of a wife "made him" sell his race car. A spine, a pair of balls and some common sense would have put out that fire before it started. Marriage is like skydiving. You don't go to walmart for the chute and then stuff the chute into a plastic barney the dinosaur backpack with your foot and then complain about how skydiving sucks ass as you plummet to earth. |
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OP, don't forget that this thread is being written by a bunch of guys who, let's face it, fucked up royally. To be fair, being married is tricky, and most guys get married when they are young and don't know shit about anything. But in the long run: "The proof of the pudding is in the tasting thereof." There was some rich guy who sold his wife's wedding dress on ebay, had this real long list of complaints that were supposed to be funny. Basically, it was obvious that the guy married the biggest piece of shit on the earth and put up with her abuse for a few years until he hated her guts. I don't really see how a guy can blame the institution of marriage because his worthless low-life sleezebag harpie of a wife "made him" sell his race car. A spine, a pair of balls and some common sense would have put out that fire before it started. Marriage is like skydiving. You don't go to walmart for the chute and then stuff the chute into a plastic barney the dinosaur backpack with your foot and then complain about how skydiving sucks ass as you plummet to earth. You have obviously missed the memo. Women suck, it's all their fault, there are a minuscule amount of decent women out there, men are taken advantage of, women are crazy, women are stupid, it's never the man (ever), women always cheat, women always marry for money, women are liars.... |