[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Wow! (Page 1 of 4)
Posted: 8/8/2014 4:36:16 AM EDT
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Interesting couple of days.
Wednesday: My wife texts me that she has an investor meeting after work. While at the "meeting." she texts me that she has had too many glasses of wine and will be staying in town with her friend. OK… Thursday: She starts texting me off the wall crap. Then I look at my phone and I have 5 texts. As I am reaching to check them I get a call from the wife: "Don't read your texts! Please promise you won't read your texts!" Ok… Thursday PM the kids and I are swimming in the wifes best friends pool. Her best friend comes out and says she has to talk with me privately. Major flags start flying… We go inside and she leads off with "You know how much I respect you and would never do anything to hurt you, blah, blah, blah. At this point I am pretty certain my wife is leaving for her best friend. Then she says, "I bought your wife a new puppy, please don't be mad…" I was thinking "THANK GOD!" Meet TC the newest member of our family: 
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New ProTip: If you are being suspected of cheating on your spouse... buy him/her a new puppy.
Her: "Honey, we have to talk... I know we've been on better terms but I wanted to tell you about what I did that night with John, your best friend, I fuc.... *interrupted* Him: Puppy!!!!!! Awww thanks honey Her: "Yeah, no problem... how was your day?" |
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Dude, if you're not going to read the texts, have a friend read them, transcribe them, and post them for you.
__________________________________________________________________ Cross-platform electronic bound book (original thread). PGP public key. «nolite confidere in principibus, in filiis hominum quibus non est salus» |
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Quoted:
Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Quoted:
Quoted:
What did the text say? Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding! Bastard, just when I got that song out of my head 
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