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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:07:57 PM EDT
Could a UFC fighter or the like beat a chimp? After that chimp attack on a lady and before that a guy(who got his face and balls torn off) I was thinking if any person w/o a weapon could take on an animal like a chimp(or maybe a wolf) and win.
Found this on Google too. 
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:09:11 PM EDT
[#1]
That orangutan? No way. Aren't they several times stronger than humans?
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:09:19 PM EDT
[#2]
Chimp? No, not a chance.
Wolf? I think so, if you know where the wolf's weak points are. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:09:36 PM EDT
[#3]
Clearly you've never seen Any Which Way But Loose.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:10:35 PM EDT
[#4]
Quoted: That orangutan? No way. Aren't they several times stronger than humans? Only because they know their strength, and don't doubt themselves as humans do. Humans are far stronger than we give ourselves credit for. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:11:14 PM EDT
[#5]
Kimbo Slice -vs- Chimp?
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:12:37 PM EDT
[#6]
Oh sure no problem. They could beat a gorilla too, they just need to stick and move, stick and move.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:13:43 PM EDT
[#7]
Quoted:
Kimbo Slice -vs- Chimp? I would pay a whole lot of money to see that.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:14:14 PM EDT
[#8]
A single wolf, maybe. A wolf pack - nope
And the chimp would just disassemble you.  |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:25:09 PM EDT
[#9]
All a chimp has to do is get ahold of you, and you would die a particularly nasty, gory death. I don't care how big and tough you are. . . they are several times stronger, and have 0% empathy in regards to your suffering––-it doesn't register with them. . . they will pull your genitals off, bite your face––-off, and as someone mentioned here earlier, rip your extremites off. And all of this will happen extremely swiftly. . .
Pray to whatever God you may that you never have to fight off any kind of ape. . .even with a weapon, it would be tricky. . . |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:25:46 PM EDT
[#10]
You would have an hard time I think but anything is possible
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:26:35 PM EDT
[#11]
according to the stuff i have heard during NHP (Non Human Primates) seminars. A young(teenage) chimp could pull your arm out of its socket if not totally off before you would have a chance to react.
full grown, you better hope that arm is all it wants! |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:30:34 PM EDT
[#12]
Quoted:
Kimbo Slice -vs- Chimp? Chimp would tear old KImbo's limbs off and eat his face. An adult chimp is 7 times stronger than a human and 10Xs meaner |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:32:56 PM EDT
[#13]
Is the human a Pirate of Apache Indian?
If so, the the COD4 engine gives them the win in 2200 of 2700 battles, due to their super coolness, and ability to drink rum even when it isn't appropriate. ETA: After thinking for a moment, about the amazing strength attributed to the chimp in comparison to humans, I looked something up. Do you know what the world record for the bench press is? I didn't either, it is amazing. 2008 Ryan Kennelly presses 1075 lbs (487.61 kg). (November 8). A chimp would have to be able to bench press 7525 pounds to match that and maintain a 7X strength advantage. I just don't believe this to be realistic. While Chimps so have a reputation for being strong compared to the average man, there are humans who are several times stronger than the average human as well. Thinking about this, yeah, I think that a human vs chimp fight could go either way, in some cases it would be a stomping one way or the other, but I think it would often be a fairly even fight. One advantage for the chimps is that they are instinctual fighters, it is part of their DNA, not so much in the average person, but there are examples of humans where that instinct is just as sharp and strong. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:36:49 PM EDT
[#14]
Chimp would win every time. Don't fight non human primates hand to hand, ever.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:36:51 PM EDT
[#15]
Chimp = Eat your face off, poop it out and fling it at the people on the other side of the fence.
Wolf = Look at you in the silly "Three Wolves" T-shirt, eat your face off, poop it out and eat it again before sniffing another wolf's ass. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:40:31 PM EDT
[#16]
Knowing you can't win must do wonders for you guys when you face challenges...
I'm not saying you have very good odds but to just up and accept defeat is not the way I was raised. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:40:45 PM EDT
[#17]
Quoted:
Quoted:
That orangutan? No way. Aren't they several times stronger than humans? Only because they know their strength, and don't doubt themselves as humans do. Humans are far stronger than we give ourselves credit for. "Stronger" in what way? Physically? Not a chance - it's just the way nature builds non-human great primates; it's all in the anatomy. The ONLY reason we are at the top of the food chain right now is because of our mental capacity, not because of our physical strength. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:42:27 PM EDT
[#18]
If you understand the critter....you have a chance.
So yes. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:44:17 PM EDT
[#19]
I thought they were only like 2 times stronger x.x;
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:45:13 PM EDT
[#20]
I'm not saying you have very good odds but to just up and accept defeat is not the way I was raised.
There is a difference between thinking you can do something, and being delusional. Check up on how apes fight, how strong they are, and the documented cases of humans vs apes. All the confidence in the world can't beat reality. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:45:55 PM EDT
[#21]
No chance, first it will bite your entire face off then it will eat your nuts.
Did you miss the chimp frenzy here on Arfcom earlier on this year? Since then I have a new found respect and fear of chimps. 
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:46:40 PM EDT
[#22]
Unless you are willing to bite the chimps face off first, then no.
Wolf? Maybe. Chimp with apposable thumbs, and no problem killing you without a second thought? Not a chance. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:49:12 PM EDT
[#23]
I wouldn't take that fight.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:51:04 PM EDT
[#24]
Possible, but you could not allow the chimp to get a hold of you. You would have to out think him cause you ain't gonna out wrestle him, and you would have to be heartless and indifferent to any suffering, both the chimp's and your own.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:51:30 PM EDT
[#25]
Quoted:
I'm not saying you have very good odds but to just up and accept defeat is not the way I was raised.
There is a difference between thinking you can do something, and being delusional. Check up on how apes fight, how strong they are, and the documented cases of humans vs apes. All the confidence in the world can't beat reality. the ol' vw bug vs. a freight train in a game of chicken |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:51:56 PM EDT
[#26]
Quoted:
Is the human a Pirate of Apache Indian? If so, the the COD4 engine gives them the win in 2200 of 2700 battles, due to their super coolness, and ability to drink rum even when it isn't appropriate. ETA: After thinking for a moment, about the amazing strength attributed to the chimp in comparison to humans, I looked something up. Do you know what the world record for the bench press is? I didn't either, it is amazing. 2008 Ryan Kennelly presses 1075 lbs (487.61 kg). (November 8). A chimp would have to be able to bench press 7525 pounds to match that and maintain a 7X strength advantage. I just don't believe this to be realistic. While Chimps so have a reputation for being strong compared to the average man, there are humans who are several times stronger than the average human as well. Thinking about this, yeah, I think that a human vs chimp fight could go either way, in some cases it would be a stomping one way or the other, but I think it would often be a fairly even fight. One advantage for the chimps is that they are instinctual fighters, it is part of their DNA, not so much in the average person, but there are examples of humans where that instinct is just as sharp and strong. This is a retarded post. So one man is a freak and is several times stronger than the average human. EVERY chimp is far stronger. Chimps don't bother bench pressing, they are too busy fighting for survival and being good at it. They will do absolutely ANYTHING to win. If a human is somehow able to get a good grip on them they will use their enormous teeth and crushing bite power to tear the limbs gripping them. Without weapons humans are no match for an adult wolf or chimp. Yes, even Ryan Kennelly would die a horrible death if he fought a healthy adult chimp. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:52:25 PM EDT
[#27]
Wolf maybe on a good day. A wolf has teeth, weight, claws to some extent, speed, and experience. If you can control the head you might have a chance.
Chimp no way. A chimp can grip with all four limbs / hands / paws with much more strength than the average human, plus speed, plus a mouthful of teeth, plus experience. Neither animal will fight you until the bell rings, they will fight you to the death. Only Chuck Norris can beat a chimp, and he has to stare it down from a safe distance. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:58:32 PM EDT
[#28]
Its possible, I suppose, with the chimp if you get lucky enough to strike him flailing with what's left of your bloody stumps after he's ripped off your hands, torn out your eyes and made you into a eunich about 15 seconds into his attack. Yeah its possible.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:59:38 PM EDT
[#29]
Quoted:
Oh sure no problem. They could beat a gorilla too, they just need to stick and move, stick and move. Who could beat a gorilla, too? UFC fighter? With an AK, yes - bare hands, not a chance! LOL! You're funny. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 7:59:53 PM EDT
[#30]
Chimp.
When you can swing from trees all day without gettin' tired and climb a vine fast, I mean REAL fast, then you might have a chance. They have teh strength, but we have teh brains. Brains invented 1911. 1911 > (chimp + wolf) |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:02:15 PM EDT
[#31]
Uriah Faber FTW.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:03:25 PM EDT
[#32]
"right turn clyde" |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:04:27 PM EDT
[#33]
Quoted:
Chimp. When you can swing from trees all day without gettin' tired and climb a vine fast, I mean REAL fast, then you might have a chance. They have teh strength, but we have teh brains. Brains invented 1911. 1911 > (chimp + wolf) So, what round for a chimp? I'm thinking 230gr +P JHP... |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:06:01 PM EDT
[#34]
Remember the chimp can grab the human with any one of 4 limbs. Not sure how ANY wrestler/grappler could beat that.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:06:05 PM EDT
[#35]
Quoted: Could a UFC fighter or the like beat a chimp? After that chimp attack on a lady and before that a guy(who got his face and balls torn off) I was thinking if any person w/o a weapon could take on an animal like a chimp(or maybe a wolf) and win. http://www.freewebs.com/chimpanzeesite/chimpanzee.jpg Found this on Google too. http://enrius.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/angry-orangutan-961.jpg Well, one is a chimp, the other is an organgutan Either one would rip the arms off any man alive.... |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:07:18 PM EDT
[#36]
Unarmed?
Chimp, No Wolf, Maybe |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:09:08 PM EDT
[#37]
Quoted:
Is the human a Pirate of Apache Indian? If so, the the COD4 engine gives them the win in 2200 of 2700 battles, due to their super coolness, and ability to drink rum even when it isn't appropriate. ETA: After thinking for a moment, about the amazing strength attributed to the chimp in comparison to humans, I looked something up. Do you know what the world record for the bench press is? I didn't either, it is amazing. 2008 Ryan Kennelly presses 1075 lbs (487.61 kg). (November 8). A chimp would have to be able to bench press 7525 pounds to match that and maintain a 7X strength advantage. I just don't believe this to be realistic. While Chimps so have a reputation for being strong compared to the average man, there are humans who are several times stronger than the average human as well. Thinking about this, yeah, I think that a human vs chimp fight could go either way, in some cases it would be a stomping one way or the other, but I think it would often be a fairly even fight. One advantage for the chimps is that they are instinctual fighters, it is part of their DNA, not so much in the average person, but there are examples of humans where that instinct is just as sharp and strong. Was this just bad sarcasm? Because its pretty damn funny. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:12:19 PM EDT
[#38]
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:16:39 PM EDT
[#39]
give the human a decent knife (and the ability to use it) to even the odds out a bit
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:17:48 PM EDT
[#40]
Quoted:
Kimbo Slice -vs- Chimp? That's the first thing that came to my mind |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:22:45 PM EDT
[#41]
Chimps are fucking ripping machines. They will rip your limbs apart, tear your extremities off and eat your face, you wouldn't be able to do diddly shit to it.
You probably would be AS fucked even if you had a knife, it would probably screw you up pretty bad before it bled out. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:40:07 PM EDT
[#42]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-NeYTTgdkg&feature=PlayList&p=4C44F6BB5C6C0680&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=3
Fighting with a chimp or other ape is up there with arm wrestling a table saw. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbo3jjs4AW0 |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:42:50 PM EDT
[#43]
Animal muscles are something like 5 times stronger than human muscles. Why? Because our big brains are oxygen hogs and we couldn't fuel that much muscle. Evolution chose brains over brawn. So use yours. Bring a gun. Bring friends with guns.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:47:41 PM EDT
[#44]
Quoted:
Is the human a Pirate of Apache Indian? If so, the the COD4 engine gives them the win in 2200 of 2700 battles, due to their super coolness, and ability to drink rum even when it isn't appropriate. ETA: After thinking for a moment, about the amazing strength attributed to the chimp in comparison to humans, I looked something up. Do you know what the world record for the bench press is? I didn't either, it is amazing. 2008 Ryan Kennelly presses 1075 lbs (487.61 kg). (November 8). A chimp would have to be able to bench press 7525 pounds to match that and maintain a 7X strength advantage. I just don't believe this to be realistic. While Chimps so have a reputation for being strong compared to the average man, there are humans who are several times stronger than the average human as well. Thinking about this, yeah, I think that a human vs chimp fight could go either way, in some cases it would be a stomping one way or the other, but I think it would often be a fairly even fight. One advantage for the chimps is that they are instinctual fighters, it is part of their DNA, not so much in the average person, but there are examples of humans where that instinct is just as sharp and strong. sumo vs monkey |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:47:42 PM EDT
[#45]
Quoted: Animal muscles are something like 5 times stronger than human muscles. Why? Because our big brains are oxygen hogs and we couldn't fuel that much muscle. Evolution chose brains over brawn. So use yours. Bring a gun. Bring friends with guns. Exactly. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:48:41 PM EDT
[#46]
I was near the Zoo in a quarantine area and watching the chimps swing around in their huge cage. These damned things were literally flying across the cage at ridiculous speeds jumping ridiculous distances. The strength of the animals was impressive as was their speed and dexterity. I had my P220 and a total of 5 magazines on me. I felt wholly under armed at that point.
Frankly if I had a group of chimps after me I'd feel under armed with an M60E3. One on one you'd be chimp chow. Multiple chimps, well you'd damned sure better have alot of armed help or something very solid to hide inside of and pray that they cant get in. Wolf well I'd rather have a single wolf after me than a single chimp. Most likely you'd still die a horrible death with the wolf tho. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:51:31 PM EDT
[#47]
I'm trying to be honest and not overestimate myself here but I think that:
Chimp: no way in hell. No way no how unless the chimp was suicidal and just didn't fight back wolf: I think I could beat a wolf. I was attacked by a chesapeak retriever when I was a teen and had to kill it with my bare hands. I was a lot younger and not as strong so I think I could take a single wolf by myself. I'm not saying I'd get away scott free, but I think i'd win. a chimp though, impossible. |
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:56:06 PM EDT
[#48]
If a chimp attacks you, the first thing it will do is clamp down on your face with its teath:
Then, it will push away from you with these muscles: 
If you're lucky, you will survive and look something like this: 
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:59:23 PM EDT
[#49]
The only reason I answered "yes" is because I believe if the human took a megadose of PCP before engaging said chimp in mortal combat..........it might be possible.
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Posted: 10/30/2009 8:59:40 PM EDT
[#50]
Quoted: Chimp would win every time. Don't fight non human primates hand to hand, ever. Yup, a chimps bones are like twice as strong as a humans and their muscles are about three times stronger than us. They will rip your face off.  |
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