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Posted: 8/17/2020 1:14:45 AM EDT
[#1]
That's not as uncommon as you'd think, and at least at the university I went to, kids pair up pretty quickly and end up dorming with like minded people anyway. Tell your son to make good friends and put in to room with them, and that's the end of the issue.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 1:20:13 AM EDT
[#2]
Quote HistoryQuoted: We just moved our freshman in last weekend, and I went through the same thought process you are going through right now since we are in the same position. It's a CYA thing on the school because if the bathroom suite doors could be locked from the room side there's the potential that a student could get locked in the bathroom from both doors whether by accident or if his roommates/suite mates are assholes. On the far end of the "what if" scenario this happens and the place burns down with kid trapped in bathroom with no exit. I appreciate your response. Did you improvise a lock or just hope for the best? If my kid is in the head his side will be open and if the other kid is in the head his side is incapable of being locked so he should be able to get out. The place is fully sprinklered so I consider the fire danger pretty low. I don't even know if I want to discuss it with them now. Might be better to just stay off the radar. Thanks. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 1:35:53 AM EDT
[#3]
I had a private dorm room that connected with an identical room via a shared bathroom. We were able to lock the bathroom doors from the dorm room side.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 1:45:21 AM EDT
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted: How do you know you haven't been dead the whole time? Or raped. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: My college dorm showers were six shower heads in one big room for the whole hall. Nobody died or got raped. How do you know you haven't been dead the whole time? Or raped.  Holy shit, I laughed so hard I almost crapped myself.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:06:00 AM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I had a private dorm room that connected with an identical room via a shared bathroom. We were able to lock the bathroom doors from the dorm room side. Same here....good old nlu |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:08:08 AM EDT
[#6]
Welcome to college.
Get a wedge lock for your boy. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:10:21 AM EDT
[#7]
If it's been that way for years and it's that way for every other kid there...I don't think I'd lose too much sleep.
Maybe some stuff gets stolen, maybe it doesn't. A dorm room isn't the place to store valuables regardless. I honestly can't recall if the doors at our dorms had locks at all...87% of the time they were left wide open |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:13:29 AM EDT
[#8]
College Freshmen are some of the biggest degenerates around. Coddled kids with poor judgement and life skills are suddenly left with no adult supervision. Many are there simply because their parents forced them. Expect the worst
In my first semester of dorm life, 90% of my classmates were drunk or high 3 days a week, every week. The cumulative GPA after the first semester for the Freshman class was 1.0, despite a small group that earned 4.0s. When I told off the local drug dealing kingpin, a Junior, he had his thugs attack me. I spent 3 months carrying a pistol and going nose-to-nose with them. They broke through a heavy steel door and destroyed everything in my dorm room twice, including $1500 in textbooks. I tape-recorded some of their death threats, as well as their assault on another student, and photographed the massive bloodstains. I told the Dean of Students I wanted out of my housing contract immediately or my evidence would go straight to the local newspaper, and that if he didn’t reign in the druggies, people were going to die. We became mortal enemies at that point, and he made damn sure my teachers screwed me whenever possible for my entire four years. The Dean gave me back my contract. It took three weeks to move out and in that time the Dean and his Resident Assistants searched my room several times when I was in class, but they never did find my pistol. I’m sure the Dean was getting his drugs from this dealer. When he got busted for dealing, the college paid for a defense attorney. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:17:02 AM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I paid extra for a private room. He learns better in the quiet. Did you at least tell him to slay as much pussy as he can while he's there or is he supposed to save himself? |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:33:25 AM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted: But only you could get into your room right? We had two person rooms when I was in college. First dorm, bathroooms were down the hall. Later dorms were two rooms with a shared bathroom, locking outer door then the doors to each two person room locked, bathroom was in the ante way. Never had a private room in college, that first dorm, we didn't even really have separate lockers (pre-WW2 dorm built as part of the first public housing project, our building was surrounded by fencing with concertina on top, projects started on the other side of the fence on the south side), later dorms we each had our own locker. My last year in the dorms, by pure chance my roommate and I already knew each other AND we both had girlfriends who lived off campus, so we'd have to go check the answering machine in the room occasionally... |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 2:52:37 AM EDT
[#11]
if you know someone who works in a metal shop they could probably make you something like this.
 Attached File |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 3:06:04 AM EDT
[#12]
Quoted: So... you put a noose in your kid’s dorm room? You see where this is going right? This, so much this. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 3:13:21 AM EDT
[#13]
Some lessons are better learned yourself OP. This includes not trusting other people for being shit bags.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 4:16:40 AM EDT
[#14]
Just install a deadbolt/latch on his side of his bathroom door.
Nobody will care. and "inspection day"? LOL. Here's a tip if you're worried about your son getting in trouble with the university: suggest to your son to have his friends throw a nice 21st birthday party in the commons area of the dormitory in about a two months. Be sure to invite the Resident Assistants (especially your boy's floor/section RA) and also invite the Dorm Hall Director/Supervisor, if there is one. Then the people in charge of his building will believe he's 21 for the remainder of the school year and at least he'll never get written up or in trouble for alcohol related incidents. I've personally seen this tactic work, but depending on the circumspection of the RA's he might need some creative documentation, which shouldn't be too hard. I mean, who would have a fake ID made that says they don't turn 21 for a couple months? Nothing beats a good long con. 
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Posted: 8/17/2020 4:31:39 AM EDT
[#15]
I went to UCSD about 25 years ago and freshman year lived in the dorms. Everything had locks. One guy forgot to lock our sliding glass door of our common area one night and our TV got stolen, which belonged to one of the guys. My roomate didn't have enough money for parking on campus one quarter (3 months) and his car got broken into twice, his stereo system stolen, then his foglights.
College aged kids steal things. The school is also in a very expensive part of San Diego (La Jolla). I say good on you for making a way for your son to lock his door OP. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 4:39:04 AM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted: if you know someone who works in a metal shop they could probably make you something like this. https://www.AR15.Com/media/mediaFiles/115692/DF969213-118C-40D1-A44F-EAF76742A3E7_jpe-1549962.JPG This is a nice idea. Details on the product? |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:00:50 AM EDT
[#17]
Inspection day? The fuck are you on about? It's not the military and the RA isn't going to be tossing the room looking for contraband.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:09:43 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Inspection day? The fuck are you on about? It's not the military and the RA isn't going to be tossing the room looking for contraband. Yeah, no shit. I lived in the dorms for 3 years during college at a small private school and never once did I have an inspection. Only saw my RA once the entire time, in my junior year. We were having a small get together in a friends suite, more like just hanging out and listening to music and playing video games, and had more booze than we were supposed to (I wasn't drinking). I guess we woke the RA up and he shut down the shindig and told the suite mates to get rid of the booze. Oh yeah, and our rooms always locked. If we lost the key, it was like $200 to get it replaced. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:19:32 AM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted: College Freshmen are some of the biggest degenerates around. Coddled kids with poor judgement and life skills are suddenly left with no adult supervision. Many are there simply because their parents forced them. Expect the worst In my first semester of dorm life, 90% of my classmates were drunk or high 3 days a week, every week. The cumulative GPA after the first semester for the Freshman class was 1.0, despite a small group that earned 4.0s. When I told off the local drug dealing kingpin, a Junior, he had his thugs attack me. I spent 3 months carrying a pistol and going nose-to-nose with them. They broke through a heavy steel door and destroyed everything in my dorm room twice, including $1500 in textbooks. I tape-recorded some of their death threats, as well as their assault on another student, and photographed the massive bloodstains. I told the Dean of Students I wanted out of my housing contract immediately or my evidence would go straight to the local newspaper, and that if he didn’t reign in the druggies, people were going to die. We became mortal enemies at that point, and he made damn sure my teachers screwed me whenever possible for my entire four years. The Dean gave me back my contract. It took three weeks to move out and in that time the Dean and his Resident Assistants searched my room several times when I was in class, but they never did find my pistol. I’m sure the Dean was getting his drugs from this dealer. When he got busted for dealing, the college paid for a defense attorney. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:22:36 AM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted: College Freshmen are some of the biggest degenerates around. Coddled kids with poor judgement and life skills are suddenly left with no adult supervision. Many are there simply because their parents forced them. Expect the worst In my first semester of dorm life, 90% of my classmates were drunk or high 3 days a week, every week. The cumulative GPA after the first semester for the Freshman class was 1.0, despite a small group that earned 4.0s. When I told off the local drug dealing kingpin, a Junior, he had his thugs attack me. I spent 3 months carrying a pistol and going nose-to-nose with them. They broke through a heavy steel door and destroyed everything in my dorm room twice, including $1500 in textbooks. I tape-recorded some of their death threats, as well as their assault on another student, and photographed the massive bloodstains. I told the Dean of Students I wanted out of my housing contract immediately or my evidence would go straight to the local newspaper, and that if he didn’t reign in the druggies, people were going to die. We became mortal enemies at that point, and he made damn sure my teachers screwed me whenever possible for my entire four years. The Dean gave me back my contract. It took three weeks to move out and in that time the Dean and his Resident Assistants searched my room several times when I was in class, but they never did find my pistol. I’m sure the Dean was getting his drugs from this dealer. When he got busted for dealing, the college paid for a defense attorney. I fell asleep during college and had a dream based on Roadhouse, but set at college. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:29:04 AM EDT
[#21]
Get a portable door lock on amazon and a lockable box for valuables (foot locker, tough box, pelican case).
I dont really see how this situation is any different than sharing a single room though. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:34:57 AM EDT
[#22]
You can thank fire code for this.
When I was in the dorms, we had deadbolts on the bathroom doors, so I didn't have to deal with that. But apparently people have been locked in the bathrooms at other colleges and the university's were ordered to remove the locks for fire code reasons. Here's an article from University of North Texas. https://www.nbcdfw.com/news/local/unt-forced-to-remove-locks-on-some-dorm-bathrooms/2007713/ Also to guys laughing at inspection day. Yea, that wasn't really a thing when I was in school 15 years ago. Now though, it is in some schools. I've heard from younger cousins and friends younger relatives that have been in college in the past few years that the RA's had to check every room on their floor randomly. Sometimes monthly, sometimes every other week, depends on the school. They don't toss it like a prison cell search, but they will come in and check for obvious stuff, mainly fire hazards. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:45:29 AM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I fell asleep during college and had a dream based on Roadhouse, but set at college. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: College Freshmen are some of the biggest degenerates around. Coddled kids with poor judgement and life skills are suddenly left with no adult supervision. Many are there simply because their parents forced them. Expect the worst In my first semester of dorm life, 90% of my classmates were drunk or high 3 days a week, every week. The cumulative GPA after the first semester for the Freshman class was 1.0, despite a small group that earned 4.0s. When I told off the local drug dealing kingpin, a Junior, he had his thugs attack me. I spent 3 months carrying a pistol and going nose-to-nose with them. They broke through a heavy steel door and destroyed everything in my dorm room twice, including $1500 in textbooks. I tape-recorded some of their death threats, as well as their assault on another student, and photographed the massive bloodstains. I told the Dean of Students I wanted out of my housing contract immediately or my evidence would go straight to the local newspaper, and that if he didn’t reign in the druggies, people were going to die. We became mortal enemies at that point, and he made damn sure my teachers screwed me whenever possible for my entire four years. The Dean gave me back my contract. It took three weeks to move out and in that time the Dean and his Resident Assistants searched my room several times when I was in class, but they never did find my pistol. I’m sure the Dean was getting his drugs from this dealer. When he got busted for dealing, the college paid for a defense attorney. I fell asleep during college and had a dream based on Roadhouse, but set at college. Pain don't hurt. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:48:25 AM EDT
[#24]
I was in college 15+ years ago, but ours had locks. Even the on campus apartment I lived in had locks on each 4 private rooms, on both bathrooms, and another lock on the main door coming into the apartment.
Times are different now too. I'd either be replacing the door knob or using that lock. I hate thieves, and the worst thieves are the ones your forced to trust. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:55:45 AM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I was in college 15+ years ago, but ours had locks. Even the on campus apartment I lived in had locks on each 4 private rooms, on both bathrooms, and another lock on the main door coming into the apartment. Times are different now too. I'd either be replacing the door knob or using that lock. I hate thieves, and the worst thieves are the ones your forced to trust. Teens have always been thieves. At some schools, half of the students in a given freshman dorm won't make it to sophomore year. Valuables need to be hidden or locked up. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 5:59:21 AM EDT
[#26]
Will we get a new thread when the OPs kid gets looked in the bathroom by his stoner roommate?
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:20:45 AM EDT
[#27]
I heard kids living in dorms tend to carry and spread all form of highly contagious sexually transmitted diseases, even between the same species.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:25:06 AM EDT
[#28]
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:26:10 AM EDT
[#29]
I had a situation similar in some older barracks, and per the Fire Dept, the bathroom door was a secondary egress and was required to remain free to open. (Navy, building manager)
Dormitory fire regs are much more stringent and they are updated, sometimes pretty radically from year to year. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:31:27 AM EDT
[#30]
WTF is "inspection day?"
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:35:36 AM EDT
[#31]
4 of us shared a room in the dorm I lived in. Don’t think our door ever got locked. I cabled down my computer at the time other than that didn’t have much I would have cared if it got stolen. Between the door never being locked and roommates inviting people over we had a lot of people in and out and I don’t remember anything ever being stolen.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:36:01 AM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Inspection day? The fuck are you on about? It's not the military and the RA isn't going to be tossing the room looking for contraband. RAs do health and welfare inspections periodically. They look for general cleanliness, banned appliances like toasters or microwave ovens (older dorms have wiring that cannot handle the power draw of multiple microwaves), etc. They dont normally toss your room. But a moron next door who cannot hide his weed from mom could easily think up a brilliant plan to hide his weed from the RAs by placing it in OP’s son’s room in the open. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:37:40 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Will we get a new thread when the OPs kid gets looked in the bathroom by his stoner roommate?  not a roommate. They merely share a bathroom. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 6:41:50 AM EDT
[#34]
The bathroom doors between two rooms definitely locked when I was in school
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Posted: 8/17/2020 7:09:05 AM EDT
[#35]
I lived in a room situation similar to your son's in my first semester of college, but there were two people on each side of the bathroom and the door locked on both sides (inside and out). I wasn't as concerned about my stuff being stolen, but it was good to be able to take a dump or shower without other people parading through the bathroom.
I also spent two semesters in a room with a high school friend and his first-year roommate (different building with a hall bathroom). They had two three-man rooms on each floor that had double the space for the extra person, and we thought that was a good deal. The extra space turned into a small living room and we had people over at all hours (our place basically turned into a community center). We were on the first floor, and the window above the couch opened to the parking lot. Friends would open the window and step into the room onto the couch. We didn't worry about theft because none of our stuff was worth much and there was always somebody we knew in the room if the window wasn't locked. The window entrance/exit was handy for bringing girls and beer into the room without going past the front desk. Any studying was done at the library, and people in the room would hold the noise down if somebody was trying to sleep (there were almost always extra people over). I enjoyed this setup more than the previous one, but it would only work with people who know each other and get along really well. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 7:24:55 AM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I paid extra for a private room. He learns better in the quiet. Wow. Just wow..... |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:07:02 AM EDT
[#37]
most college kids living in a dorm have 1-3 room mates, all in the same room. People that don't know each other. There is no locking those roomates out. they live there. Your kid has a private room with a shared bath. that other kid is a room mate with a bathroom separating different sides of the same room, the room divider is a bathroom.. That is how the school looks at it. your kid has 1000 times more privacy than most. The only way to get a private room is to have no room mate and no shared bath.
Your kid can put a door jam thing on his side of the door if he wants to. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:10:21 AM EDT
[#38]
just get a skinny wedge, take the wedge and slip it in the gap of the door, it forces the bolt against the door frame
and no one can turn the handle to open the door our doors had locks, but that didn't stop my room mates I shared the bathroom with, they would take apart the door knob, and you would catch them in the room at 2am, crawling around trying to run ropes on the floor to trip you up. one time they switched my alarm clock an hour forward so I got up at 5 instead of 6 for my 8am class, bunch of fun, but a bunch of ball busters only made it there 6 months but we had a great time |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:12:02 AM EDT
[#39]
Daughters dorm at Clemson had locks. Girls in other suite would lock the door getting ready and go to class forgetting to unlock. No one in daughters suite could get to the bathroom until someone came back and heard the pounding on the door.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:13:08 AM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted: My college dorm showers were six shower heads in one big room for the whole hall. Nobody died or got raped. No private toilets either. Maybe you just didn't use it long enough. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:19:01 AM EDT
[#41]
Just change the door knob. It's 2 screws, 5 minutes and maybe $20. Return their knob at the end of the year.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:24:04 AM EDT
[#42]
Quoted: I went to Lowe's last night and picked up a piece of strap and some aircraft cable and thimbles to make a noose around the doorknob so it can't be opened. The bar sits on some command hooks and holds the noose. If he gets caught I told him it's part of his Wiccan culture or some shit. I made up two sets so if they confiscate one he has another until I can make another couple. One of the clowns we talked to said everyone signs a, "Respect Pledge" saying you won't fuck with other people's shit and that would keep my kids shit safe. Setting your son up for a Nascar moment |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 8:42:06 AM EDT
[#43]
Stop helicopter parenting. Drop him off drive away and let him sort it out.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:09:31 AM EDT
[#44]
The upside was that it allowed me to take a surprise prank photo of one of my suite mates on the shitter.....It was a coordinated effort. One guy flung the door open and I snapped the photo. #collegehiginks
  He didn't see the humor....... 
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:13:59 AM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted: But we had one locking door into the room. I think you missed the point. He did miss the point. Of course roomies failing to lock your room or being the kind of person you don't want to get stuck with the whole semester...the kind with thieving friends spending lots of time in "your" room... Of course an army barracks bay was worse...but you had a wall locker and foot locker you could secure. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:20:53 AM EDT
[#46]
How is this any different than sharing a dorm room?
i predict your kid is going to go 100% wild if this affects you and him. i still don't understand the problem. you can't lock each other out. I've lived that way and it sucks. get the fuck over it. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:25:05 AM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's called communal living. I had to share a room with someone I had never met until I got there. He could go through all my shit anytime I wasn't in the room. OMG! A dorm room or roommates are not the same as a dorm bathroom that has an unlocked door to your room where anyone can just enter. Do you have a real degree or was it from a Cracker Jack box? |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:25:18 AM EDT
[#48]
When I was in the army our shitters and showers were in one open room with no doors or walls.
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:27:07 AM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I paid extra for a private room. He learns better in the quiet. Quote HistoryQuoted: I paid extra for a private room. He learns better in the quiet. Quoted: When I was a freshman the most expensive things in my room were engineering textbooks. |
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Posted: 8/17/2020 9:29:52 AM EDT
[#50]
"inspection day" Hah, wtf is that?
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