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Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:01:23 PM EDT
[#1]
Might be a good opportunity for your guilt free  freedom if you let it continue.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:01:23 PM EDT
[#2]
Out of all the guys banging unfulfilled wives I can guarantee you that not one is paying attention to her outside of your bed.
OP’s wife is GTG
The simp gonna simp.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:02:32 PM EDT
[#3]
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Quoted:
I can't imagine being in a relationship where such a thing is a concern.  How long have you been married?
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Cheating?

Dudes like all of a girls pictures and 'slide into her DMs' for one reason and it aint prayer requests lol

Whether she's entertaining it is unknown. But that dude wants to fuck.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:02:36 PM EDT
[#4]
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Quoted:
Needs a poll:  Men, how many women are you currently Private Messaging that you aren't trying to sleep with?
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Then after, how many of them WOULD you sleep with lol
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:02:47 PM EDT
[#5]
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:03:27 PM EDT
[#6]
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Quoted:
I have never "liked" anything.
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Like, Like Liked
Or Like Liiikkkkeeeddded
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:03:55 PM EDT
[#7]
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Quoted:


I have several female friends. Some I've met at work.
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Quoted:
Quoted:
I'm a firm believer that men and women are unable to be "just friends".. Maybe the woman is serious when she says friends only but the dude is simply just waiting his turn, almost always..

But yeah it's a no for me


I have several female friends. Some I've met at work.


I think the terms are generally too broad.

May people call acquaintances friends, same with group friends. I'm group friends with lots of women, mostly the spouses of my male friends. Outside of being in a group we have no reason to communicate, or nothing at all to talk about really except maybe small talk.

A friend is someone you would give you credit card number to and trust your children with, they tend to be quite rare, and there isn't much room for many of them in most people's lives.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:04:04 PM EDT
[#8]
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Quoted:


Like, Like Liked
Or Like Liiikkkkeeeddded
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View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
I have never "liked" anything.


Like, Like Liked
Or Like Liiikkkkeeeddded


Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:04:06 PM EDT
[#9]
Sit down with her and have a serious conversation about it. Turn it around and ask her how she would feel if you were doing this. If she dismisses you or the point you are trying to make and gets defensive, you'll know there more to it than meets the eye. Next steps are up to you and depend upon the overall state of your marriage.

As a last resort, you might try and contact the " ex-delivery" guy and let him know in a friendly manner that would you appreciate it greatly if he would stop the shenanigans. That might just be enough to make him think twice about it, then again maybe not.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:04:20 PM EDT
[#10]
I have an ex girlfriend who is married now and I talk to her regularly. And it's not just I that initiates the conversations. But, that's all it is. Friends.

Also my last girlfriend has a male friends she talks to and would go have coffee with. I've even met him. It never bothered me because I trusted her. The hard part for me, though I learned to not let it bother me, is that she's a massage therapist and worked on guys all the time. Again, that goes back to trust. She knows I have female friends that I talk to and see from time to time. It was never an issue.

So the key here is, do you trust her to do the right thing?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:04:38 PM EDT
[#11]
I agree he’s up to no good. As other said if it was a legit friend or whatever sure. But not some random delivery guy.

However don’t agree with everyone in the “my wife can’t talk to any other guy” crowd.

I have female friends. They’re married. I’m married. I talk to them directly. I don’t cc their husband on the texts nor my wife. Got nothing to hide if any of them asked to see our convos either.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:04:44 PM EDT
[#12]
the dude is trying to bang your wife however your wife might not be picking up on it and just trying to be a good friend.

Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:05:10 PM EDT
[#13]
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Quoted:
Yeah gonna go with there is shit going on for sure. If she's not riding the horse yet, she's definitely taken the saddle out of the barn
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Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:05:19 PM EDT
[#14]
Quoted:
my wife's social media posts.
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I think I see the issue.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:05:33 PM EDT
[#15]
@Bluegrasscardinal if you want to go silent nuclear, go on her Facebook account again and block the guy. It won't be obvious to her unless she's purposely talking to him.

I might have experience with this.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:05:34 PM EDT
[#16]
No it’s not ok.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:06:32 PM EDT
[#17]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
code words:  "prayer request" = "booty call"
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comment on one of the facebook photos:

"Damnnnn girl you look fine. After your husband goes to sleep come over for a prayer request."

Did I use it right?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:06:49 PM EDT
[#18]
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Quoted:
Edit: No it is not inappropriate.  If you can't trust your wife then you don't have a good relationship with her.

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This………gotta trust, if she fucks around it’s on her and your better off.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:07:47 PM EDT
[#19]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Needs a poll:  Men, how many women are you currently Private Messaging that you aren't trying to sleep with?
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I just had several private messages with a married girl, but I've known her since 1st grade, there was never anything romantic between us, and we were catching up after a girl we grew up with passed away.

Another girl I know from college just randomly started texting me about day to day stuff I don't need to know about. I assumed she's ready for an affair, but I ignore most her texts.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:08:55 PM EDT
[#20]
Not appropriate per OPs situation
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:09:28 PM EDT
[#21]
Slightly less than half the replies say this is acceptable behavior.

Coincidentally, the divorce rate in this country is also slightly less than 50%.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:09:34 PM EDT
[#22]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
My wife is addicted to the online “words with friends” app. Literally every single day she’s got dudes hitting on her. It’s not a big deal.
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yeah, it's not a big deal until you come home early and got a guy on each end of her in your bed. Shit happened to a guy I used to work with.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:10:03 PM EDT
[#23]
Lol.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:10:16 PM EDT
[#24]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Your wife is going to fuck him

She will start calling him a friend and she will say "What, I cant have friends?"

Good luck but its over
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That's how I ended up divorced.

Hopefully though, OP's situation is just a misunderstanding.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:10:30 PM EDT
[#25]
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Quoted:
Your instincts are likely correct. Listen to your gut.
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This.

If some guy was initiating contact with my wife and she didn't tell me about it that would be the first problem.

The interloping Casanova is the second problem.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:10:54 PM EDT
[#26]
Should have waited and watched gathered more info. Would she be mad if you were getting pms from another woman?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:11:53 PM EDT
[#27]
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Quoted:
he's worming his way into her life, slowly innocently trying to be her confidant and when you fuck up he will strike. Time for him to FO and dont fall for her or him trying to be "reasonable" about it. He can find unmarried women to pray for him , etc. Put your foot down. I prefer the DONT CONTACT MY WIFE EVER AGAIN direct approach but thats just me..also be ready for her to defend him.....
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This is the correct answer....
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:12:18 PM EDT
[#28]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
He's still delivering packages
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Attachment Attached File
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:12:20 PM EDT
[#29]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
No, not ok. She needs to shut that down.
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Unfortunately, SHE knows it's not appropriate. Instead of shutting it down, she's let it go on.  She's explaining it away.  She's making excuses for him.  

Details you're leaving out: has she been responding?  When he said they look great, did she ignore it or say thanks?  Are you in any of the photos she posted? etc.

It's possible supplies aren't all he delivered at that office.

Next comes her criticizing you for being insecure and jealous and paranoid and overreacting.  

Voice of experience.  

ETA, BONUS:  All your mutual friends are seeing this crap too.  And you're not the only one noticing.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:12:38 PM EDT
[#30]
No.  Not acceptable.  He's messaging her because he wants to get laid.  The "prayer" thing is bullshit.  It is NOT ok for your wife to be having private, personal conversations with him.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:12:49 PM EDT
[#31]
Have you sold your guns to a buddy for $1? Can I be that buddy?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:13:22 PM EDT
[#32]
Quoted:
Months ago, noticed that this guy was "liking" or commenting on every one of my wife's social media posts. Asked her about it, if he knew the guy and what his deal was. Just basic intel gathering. Apparently guy used to deliver supplies to her workplace office, no big deal she said.  Still kind of stuck with me, especially after he commented on my wife's pic from her Florida va vacation where he commented that wife/daughter looked "great."  (No, not posting wife pics today, fellas).  

She showed me a video on her phone yesterday and I swiped off her app and took a quick glance of her FB messages. Low and behold this guy had chatted her up last week.
I asked her about it today and she said he was asking for prayer requests for his mom etc.  

Sound innocuous enough, but I ain't buying it either.  You want a prayer request go to church, or find a group of friends that you can pray with etc.  Messaging a married woman for a prayer request out of the blue falls outside appropriate to  me.  

Which leads me to the point or question or this, is it appropriate for a married woman to chat, or private message with another man, outside business or work related conversation?  Or vice versa.
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@Bluegrasscardinal

Are you the same Louisville area (Southern Indiana??) guy who was in a firefight over a dispute and documented it on this site a year or two ago?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:13:29 PM EDT
[#33]
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Quoted:


yeah, it's not a big deal until you come home early and got a guy on each end of her in your bed. Shit happened to a guy I used to work with.
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I thought words with friends was a two player game?
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:13:34 PM EDT
[#34]
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Quoted:



This   gotta trust, if she fucks around it's on her and your better off.
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I think it's more about not trusting the guy with his intentions. It's also the disrespect the guy is giving to male partner knowing she's not single.. Or something like that.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:13:40 PM EDT
[#35]
Major blow out time with the wife.  Looks like I'm heading out in the Daniel Boone National Forest near me and downing a pint. Fuck all this.  

19 years of marriage and work two jobs to give us a good life and some dickhead motherfucker can try to slide on in using the Cross as his method.  Of course, she doesn't realize that this is what he's doing and is somewhat defensive.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:14:19 PM EDT
[#36]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Slightly less than half the replies say this is acceptable behavior.
Coincidentally, the divorce rate in this country is also slightly less than 50%.
View Quote


There are so many great reasons to be married to a woman. Having one pussy the rest of your life is not one of those reasons.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:14:32 PM EDT
[#37]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Well, if OP is making the smoke.

Sorry OP, but time to be an adult. Look at the messages. If she is right, apologize, grow up, and address your insecurity. If you have trust issues, you need to address the internal ones you have OR address the things she is or has done that justifies the lack of trust.
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Spot on.   A gorwn woman can talk to a male collegue without it being cheating. I swear, some guys are stuck in middle school.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:14:34 PM EDT
[#38]
You spooked her she's deleted the messages give it a week or so and make her show you her messages or look yourself you will have your answer.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:14:50 PM EDT
[#39]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I have an ex girlfriend who is married now and I talk to her regularly. And it's not just I that initiates the conversations. But, that's all it is. Friends.

Also my last girlfriend has a male friends she talks to and would go have coffee with. I've even met him. It never bothered me because I trusted her. The hard part for me, though I learned to not let it bother me, is that she's a massage therapist and worked on guys all the time. Again, that goes back to trust. She knows I have female friends that I talk to and see from time to time. It was never an issue.

So the key here is, do you trust her to do the right thing?
View Quote


It's a matter of putting yourself in situations. Maybe she isn't looking to cheat, but if she's always talking to other guys she's leaving the door open.

On the flip side, you may not be looking to cheat, but if your hobby is getting drunk and hanging out at strip clubs is your girl going to trust you?

It's a lot easier for a woman to cheat than a man. Delivery dude at her office is DTF every day. So is Steve from accounting. So is the waiter. Etc.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:15:15 PM EDT
[#40]
looks like you caught it early.

2 weeks and they would have hooked up.

you wife having private coms with a strange man is a big NO.

Call her out, let her know, this is not cool.

You should look at older texts and web history.

Ask her to turn on find a friend on the iphone for a few weeks.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:15:26 PM EDT
[#41]
If you think some guy wants to bang your wife, you're right. He does.
If you think your wife might be receptive, you're right. She is.
If you think your wife is cheating on you, you're right. She is.

Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:15:35 PM EDT
[#42]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


@Bluegrasscardinal

Are you the same Louisville area (Southern Indiana??) guy who was in a firefight over a dispute and documented it on this site a year or two ago?
View Quote



Not me
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:16:18 PM EDT
[#43]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Major blow out time with the wife.  Looks like I'm heading out in the Daniel Boone National Forest near me and downing a pint. Fuck all this.  

19 years of marriage and work two jobs to give us a good life and some dickhead motherfucker can try to slide on in using the Cross as his method.  Of course, she doesn't realize that this is what he's doing and is somewhat defensive.
View Quote


Take some time to cool off before things get out of hand. Come back and talk to her once you're calmer.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:16:49 PM EDT
[#44]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Go to the guys profile

See if your wife liked any of his pics

If so Id say you prob got a problem

If not it could be nothing and perhaps your wife is ignoring most of the messages to begin with
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This.


But since this is GD I'm gonna say divorce her ass now.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:17:25 PM EDT
[#45]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Major blow out time with the wife.  Looks like I'm heading out in the Daniel Boone National Forest near me and downing a pint. Fuck all this.  

19 years of marriage and work two jobs to give us a good life and some dickhead motherfucker can try to slide on in using the Cross as his method.  Of course, she doesn't realize that this is what he's doing and is somewhat defensive.
View Quote


Is it a man or multiple men like the title?

Attachment Attached File
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:18:05 PM EDT
[#46]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


It's a matter of putting yourself in situations. Maybe she isn't looking to cheat, but if she's always talking to other guys she's leaving the door open.

On the flip side, you may not be looking to cheat, but if your hobby is getting drunk and hanging out at strip clubs is your girl going to trust you?

It's a lot easier for a woman to cheat than a man. Delivery dude at her office is DTF every day. So is Steve from accounting. So is the waiter. Etc.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
I have an ex girlfriend who is married now and I talk to her regularly. And it's not just I that initiates the conversations. But, that's all it is. Friends.

Also my last girlfriend has a male friends she talks to and would go have coffee with. I've even met him. It never bothered me because I trusted her. The hard part for me, though I learned to not let it bother me, is that she's a massage therapist and worked on guys all the time. Again, that goes back to trust. She knows I have female friends that I talk to and see from time to time. It was never an issue.

So the key here is, do you trust her to do the right thing?


It's a matter of putting yourself in situations. Maybe she isn't looking to cheat, but if she's always talking to other guys she's leaving the door open.

On the flip side, you may not be looking to cheat, but if your hobby is getting drunk and hanging out at strip clubs is your girl going to trust you?

It's a lot easier for a woman to cheat than a man. Delivery dude at her office is DTF every day. So is Steve from accounting. So is the waiter. Etc.

You're absolutely not wrong.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:18:41 PM EDT
[#47]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Major blow out time with the wife.  Looks like I'm heading out in the Daniel Boone National Forest near me and downing a pint. Fuck all this.  

19 years of marriage and work two jobs to give us a good life and some dickhead motherfucker can try to slide on in using the Cross as his method.  Of course, she doesn't realize that this is what he's doing and is somewhat defensive.
View Quote



Taking some time to calm down is always a good thing.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:18:44 PM EDT
[#48]
Now that you found FB messenger stuff she is going to switch over to snap chat so it deletes the messages.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:18:45 PM EDT
[#49]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:



Not me
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
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Quoted:
Quoted:


@Bluegrasscardinal

Are you the same Louisville area (Southern Indiana??) guy who was in a firefight over a dispute and documented it on this site a year or two ago?



Not me


Got it. Best of luck, maybe see if she is willing to try couples counseling. Issues over possible infidelity is not uncommon and therapists have strategies. If you gotta drink, hope you have a buddy to hang with bro.
Link Posted: 9/8/2022 4:19:01 PM EDT
[#50]
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