| Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. |
|
Quoted: Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. Why? |
|
Quoted: Why? Quoted: Quoted: Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. Why? Farmhouse built in 1930/1953 on 150+ acres, more than 5 miles from a fire station and no fire hydrant within 500 feet of the house. And now my roof is 31 years old. |
|
Quoted: I’m trying to get all my ducks in a row to get financing—purchasing my ex-wife’s half of my house and property. A member here is a mortgage guy and he’s helping me, but I’m still unsure if I’ll be successful in getting financing. Panicking and unable to sleep. Have to resolve a bunch of issues and I know I’ve gotta pay some bills or it isn’t going to happen and I’ll lose the house. Been awake all night and I think I’m having a legit anxiety attack. Every cent in my upcoming paychecks is allotted and I still have some debts I gotta satisfy—even if I can somehow find the funds I’m freaking out that I won’t be able to get a loan. |
|
Quoted: Farmhouse built in 1930/1953 on 150+ acres, more than 5 miles from a fire station and no fire hydrant within 500 feet of the house. And now my roof is 31 years old. I'm afraid that getting insurance isn't any easier than it was in 2014 and likely MUCH more expensive If there is a way to get a loan against the acerage itself in order to satisfy the ex's portion that MAY be an answer that does not involve requiring home insurance and while the interest rate would likely be higher it may be a wash if you avoid a home insurance payment. But just spitballing because I have no idea what kind of requirements a lender might have for even a loan against land itself. May we ask how much you need to buy the ex out? |
|
Quoted: The answer you are looking for is, "Yes, I am serious". I guarantee there are a lot of men that have been in the same boat and would kick a few bucks his way so he could keep the property. This also would make it easy for family and friends to give him some help. Let the ARFCOMMER with cleaner finances than Dave Ramsey be the one to cast the first stone. It’s one thing if someone fucks up their trailer payment after a weekend booze fest. It’s another if someone wants to put up a GSG (never use GFM, they are liberal trash) for them and offer people that care an opportunity to help. |
|
Quoted: He doesn't own it. He owns half of it, basically, and in doing so he's tied to one of the most evil women we've ever read about. Then she can come up with half of the repair money to get it fixed and sold. Equality is a bitch. She wants to do things by halves, let her. |
|
Quoted: A house is just a box to keep your shit dry and to sleep in. Do what you can but let it go if you can't keep it. And get a second job. He's been worrying about this for a long time. Instead of just getting a new place, he wants to do things the hard way, just because. I forget the little details but the short version is that he just wants this one thing, even though there are other options that are easier. He just doesn't want to move on. |
|
Quoted: Then she can come up with half of the repair money to get it fixed and sold. Equality is a bitch. She wants to do things by halves, let her. Quoted: Quoted: He doesn't own it. He owns half of it, basically, and in doing so he's tied to one of the most evil women we've ever read about. Then she can come up with half of the repair money to get it fixed and sold. Equality is a bitch. She wants to do things by halves, let her. That gets completely out of my wheelhouse. I don’t know many of the particulars of his situation. I do know this, if he could figure up an amount, it would take him, to get a loan closed without being behind the eight ball from day, one, and someone were to spearhead a fundraiser to help him, with that, I would be willing to contribute to it, and I suspect that hundreds of other people would be also. I don’t think the OP is here to ask for charity, and I have no control over what he does, I’m simply saying that there are people here willing to help. |
|
Quoted: +1 Let the Ex buy you out of the house and walk away, or sell it and split whatever proceeds may be left. Find a cheap apartment and rent until you get things settled down a bit. This is the thing that was suggested over and over for years, whenever he makes this thread. He could have done this a long time ago, and by this time would have been better off. |
|
Quoted: He doesn't own it. He owns half of it, basically, and in doing so he's tied to one of the most evil women we've ever read about. And no matter what she does, he still pines for her. He goes out of his way to acquiesce, to her even when, no matter how unreasonable. At first I was sympathetic to the fix he was in but over time became less so. It's been the same story for years, possibly over a decade. |
|
Quoted: And no matter what she does, he still pines for her. He goes out of his way to acquiesce, to her even when, no matter how unreasonable. At first I was sympathetic to the fix he was in but over time became less so. It's been the same story for years, possibly over a decade. Quoted: Quoted: He doesn't own it. He owns half of it, basically, and in doing so he's tied to one of the most evil women we've ever read about. And no matter what she does, he still pines for her. He goes out of his way to acquiesce, to her even when, no matter how unreasonable. At first I was sympathetic to the fix he was in but over time became less so. It's been the same story for years, possibly over a decade. I recognize your point and it does temper (but not extinguish) my enthusiasm here. |
|
I remember OP's divorce thread here: https://www.ar15.com/forums/General/-ARCHIVED-THREAD-Been-divorced-Three-years-Ex-wife-now-wants-some-of-the-guns-/5-2658041/?page=1 There was alot of tough love advice in there and OP didnt want to take it.e In this thread he tells us the house and property are beyond his means to fix and get the necessary financing for insurance, mortgage, etc. It also doesnt sound like OP would be able to keep up payments given what interest rates are now on home refinancing. It's unfortunate, but OP, it sounds like you wouldn't be able to keep the house unless your finances and job pay scale changed dramatically. |
|
Quoted: The answer you are looking for is, "Yes, I am serious". I guarantee there are a lot of men that have been in the same boat and would kick a few bucks his way so he could keep the property. This also would make it easy for family and friends to give him some help. Quoted: Quoted: Are you serious? A go fund me for someone that owns their home already. That is ridiculous and a sign of the time we live now. The answer you are looking for is, "Yes, I am serious". I guarantee there are a lot of men that have been in the same boat and would kick a few bucks his way so he could keep the property. This also would make it easy for family and friends to give him some help. To each his own. I don't have much and probably never will, but I ain't had to beg for it either. |
|
Quoted: There’s a member here who’s a mortgage broker who’s helping me. But I’m talking literally money to pay taxes and insurance just to get the loan. I’m talking money to pay for repairs just to get approval for insurance. Looking at not being able to pay for electric and furnace fuel for the winter. If there is damage, is the house worth keeping? If you're not sleeping, have you thought about driving for Lyft or Grubhub? You need a second job/side hustle. |
|
Quoted: He's been worrying about this for a long time. Instead of just getting a new place, he wants to do things the hard way, just because. I forget the little details but the short version is that he just wants this one thing, even though there are other options that are easier. He just doesn't want to move on. Ok, got it. I get wanting to keep a piece of his old life but if I’m picking up what people are laying down it’s time for him to move on. That can be by default or with proactive action that limits his financial hardship-they choice is his. |
|
Quoted: Is what you owe her a set amount writtin into the divorce decree or is it based on fair market vlue at the time of sale? I asked that in a previous thread, but don't remember an answer. Her half should have been decided on years ago, not at the current market value. I hope he isn't getting screwed her as well. 150 acres in Kentucky ought to be worth something. Perhaps just selling the entire place and using the proceeds for another house is in order. |
|
Quoted: Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. You will not get a mortgage if you use a debt consolidation company. |
|
I don’t still pine for her. I wish she’d never gone off the rails and done all the things that hurt my family, and I wish I was still happily married and employed in my career. But it’s done, done, not ever gonna be that way. Everyone keeps asking about the amount. It was decided in the divorce decree and we agreed upon an amount to buy her out. $120,000. The property is easily worth twice that. Yeah I want to keep it. We worked our asses off to buy it back in 2014 and it’s the only thing I have left. If we sell it, where do I go? Where does my daughter go. I’ll never be able to afford another piece of property this size. We have poured our hearts and souls into this place. I’ll be damned if I’ll be forced to sell to appease my ex. |
|
Quoted: I don’t still pine for her. I wish she’d never gone if the rails and done all the things that hurt my family, and I wish I was still happily married and employed in my career. But it’s fine, fine, not ever gonna be that way. Everyone keeps asking about the amount. It was decided in the divorce decree and we agreed upon an amount to buy her out. $120,000. The property is easily worth twice that. Yeah I want to keep it. We worked our asses off to buy it back in 2014 and it’s the only thing I have left. If we sell it, where do I go? Where does my daughter go. I’ll never be able to afford another piece of property this size. We have poured our hearts and souls into this place. I’ll be damned if I’ll be forced to sell to appease my ex. So what exactly would it take for you to scrape up the cash to get a mortgage - that you can be approved for, and make payments on, given your current situation - for $120k on a ~$250k property? I'm assuming you're looking at maybe a $750/month payment before considering property taxes and insurance. So let's say $950/month total. Typical debt/income ratio is, say 36%. $950 is 36% of about $2640 as a monthly figure or about $32,000 per year annual income. You said you make $19/hr or about $38,000. Obviously there's more I don't know and I certainly don't want you to air out all your personal business here, but it seems as if you're within the realm of possibility here. |
|
So around 800 a month for a 120k mortgage based on 7% interest, just a quick look, and maybe 300 in taxes and other stuff. Real basic look, nothing specific Can you get a better job, overtime, or second job to pay that amount? How long can you keep that up? Are there certain payments that are ending soon, like a car payment or school, that will alleviate the money issue? Can you sell any land or assets to pay it down? |
| That’s a huge chunk of property. Unless you’re running cattle sell half of it. Pay her off, fix your house up, and be happy you still have a giant chunk of land. Or don’t, stress yourself out to no end taking years off your life, and continue living paycheck to paycheck. |
| Op is being dodgy. How much do you owe in it? How much is your current mortgage? How much do you make and what are your expenses? That price seems insanely low for that kind of acreage. If you actually only make $19 an hour you need a new job. Chipotle is hiring around here for $22. You might have to sell and buy a smaller property. Sure, 20 or 40 acres isn't as big as you have now, but it is still big. |
|
I have been in the mortgage industry for over 25 years. PLEASE listen to what your loan officer is saying and not random advice on here.. some of the advice might be good BUT there is an incredible amount of bad advice. It's like going to the neighborhood Facebook app and asking for advice on guns. You never know what you will get and ONLY you and the loan officer really know what you need to be doing. |
|
Quoted: Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. This is exactly what I am talking about.. Do not call them without talking to your LO first! Those places can destroy your credit. |
|
Quoted: Op is being dodgy. How much do you owe in it? How much is your current mortgage? How much do you make and what are your expenses? That price seems insanely low for that kind of acreage. If you actually only make $19 an hour you need a new job. Chipotle is hiring around here for $22. You might have to sell and buy a smaller property. Sure, 20 or 40 acres isn't as big as you have now, but it is still big. THERE IS NO MORTGAGE. I DON’T OWE ANYTHING ON THE HOUSE. It is paid for. I have to pay the taxes and legal fees and then buy her half ($120,000) so that I can be free and clear. Then if I want to sell some, I can. Or sell the whole thing. I make about $3250 a month. Yeah it sucks. This is the highest paying job I have been able to find. I lost my RN license for five years and in all likelihood I won’t attempt to get it reinstated. Too expensive. My expenses aren’t huge. Car insurance, $100. Electric, $150-$200. Water $45. Phones/wifi, $120. After that, food and gas. My 18 year old daughter lives with me and makes about $350 a week. Gas, about $100 a week. I’ve finally gotten to the point where I was starting to save money. Had about $3000 in the bank but had some expenses and unexpected bills. I need to do some repairs and just don’t have the money right now. Meeting tomorrow with a guy who is a member here, others here recommended him for getting financing. I just want to get her off the legal deed to the property. I do need to get homeowners insurance and pay my property tax, and then worry about tax on my vehicle at the end of December. |
|
I'm probably missing something, and I haven't read all posts, but I do see no mortgage and property is owned 50/50 by you and woman. The value of the house is about $240k and you need $120 to buy her out of her half of it, and once you do that, you'll own the house 100%, is that an accurate summary? |
|
I see that you were an RN. I was investigating some online jobs and looked at medical coding. Turns out that it's the kind of job that people go into who have medical experience; you don't come off the street as I was trying to do. But it sounds like you could do this easily as a 2nd job. Working from home, too. Hope this is helpful. IM incoming. |
|
Quoted: Farmhouse built in 1930/1953 on 150+ acres, more than 5 miles from a fire station and no fire hydrant within 500 feet of the house. And now my roof is 31 years old. Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Someone sent me a link to some sort of tax debt/debt consolidation company. Going to call them tonight to see if there’s any options that work for me. Getting insurance is one of the big worries. When I was unemployed I had to choose between electric being in and paying a horrible homeowners insurance payment, and I chose to pay the electric and heat my home in sub zero weather. It was almost impossible getting coverage back in 2014 when we bought the house. I’m terrified that I won’t be able to get insurance for the mortgage. Why? Farmhouse built in 1930/1953 on 150+ acres, more than 5 miles from a fire station and no fire hydrant within 500 feet of the house. And now my roof is 31 years old. That's a lot of land. I'd either subdivide and sell some or, better yet, sell the whole thing, cash out and downsize. Buy a smaller, cheaper home and use the cash difference to get life squared away. If any is left, invest it. |
|
You said you have an 18 year old daughter so you aren’t a super young man, can you draw from your retirement if the property is that important? I don’t know a ton of the details but 120k is not very much money to come up with. I understand you lost your RN license but the ones I know make well over 120k a year. Have you not been able to find a job, with your experience and education you should be falling out of bed to 75k a year salary. If you can’t find that in your area use this as a blessing to get away from there and start over. Living paycheck to paycheck with no retirement is gonna be a miserable living as your 18 year old spreads her wings and moves away. Not to sound mean or rude, but there is some good advice in this thread you seem extremely stubborn the way you’re ignoring it. Good luck. |
|
Quoted: I'm probably missing something, and I haven't read all posts, but I do see no mortgage and property is owned 50/50 by you and woman. The value of the house is about $240k and you need $120 to buy her out of her half of it, and once you do that, you'll own the house 100%, is that an accurate summary? That’s accurate. I agreed to buy her out in the agreement, and when I lost my job she told me that I should take as much time as i needed to get back in my feet. She’s really not pushed it these last two years but after she lost her home last month I guess she decided the time is now. |
|
What can you sell? Have a firesale on everything. A wise friend of mine once said "it's all just stuff, and can be replaced". That wise man got the privilege of paying for his ex wife's house. I think she left him one plate, one set of silverware, and maybe a chair. She cleaned him out, but he kept in mind that it was all replaceable. That guy is a happy millionaire now with a good looking girlfriend. In the end it was indeed all replaceable. |
|
We got a GREAT price on it back in 2014. 166 acres, all mountains and forest, about five acres flat around the house and outbuildings. Back from the 50’s thru the late 80’s there was a commercial chicken farm here, I have a 90’x330’ metal pole bs behind the house full of old chicken cages. The old man who owned the property died in 2013 and his kids just wanted the property sold. They offered to take $20,000 of the original price of $179,000 if they could leave the barn up, so we agreed. I used the $20,000 we saved to go to school and get my nursing degree. Honestly I don’t know if it could be subdivided, it’s mountains and cliffs along the perimeter, not a lot of places to access the property. We started to slowly renovate the house, but when my wife left I just fell apart. I stopped trimming the trees, let the forest creep in and overgrow everything. I just didn’t care. Struggled with depression, crawled into a bottle a few times but I never much had the taste for booze, I just can’t keep at it enough to be an alcoholic. I tried but it just didn’t work. I gave up and just crawled into bed every night. I’m trying to push myself out of it. I have to save it, I can’t afford to lose it and I’m terrified that’s gonna happen. |
|
Quoted: PM me your PayPal or Zelle info and I'll buy you dinner. Getting divorced sucks, stressing out about money sucks. Btdt myself, you'll still be alive on the far side no matter how it turns out and have the ability to rebuild yourself. Getting divorced from wife #1 and rebuilding after taking all the debt and 2 car payments took me to a much better place than I'd have been if we'd stayed together. Wasn't pleasant at the time, but my life turned out much better in the end. My ex is basically in the same place but with husband #3 now. Wonder if she’s learned she’s the problem yet? |
| Bro you can’t maintain 166 acres on 40k. Imagine you’re one of us, making less than $40k and saying you own166 acres with a house and shit. That’s ridiculous. The bank’s job is to lend you money, if they say it’s a bad idea at 50% LTV it’s probably a bad idea. That’s a slam dunk deal. Time to move on, and let it go. You made a bad decision; now is the time to pay for it. |