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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:23:49 PM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's completely made up by the church. Nonsense. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:27:59 PM EDT
[#2]
Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in.
I don’t need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don’t need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:30:12 PM EDT
[#3]
This thread is stupid. It's basically just asking if people are Catholic or not.
You could do a similar thread on prayer rugs, and surprise, surprise, nobody will find them important outside of Muslims. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:33:53 PM EDT
[#4]
Ask a Catholic is where you find you answer. Maybe it substitutes for the foot washing Jesus did for the disciples at the Last Supper/Communion got. I'm not qualified, just bored for a good thread.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:35:01 PM EDT
[#5]
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:46:00 PM EDT
[#6]
Wait, that little dish of water isn't for washing the sweat off your nutsack? Shit.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:48:22 PM EDT
[#7]
I have a hard time taking religious queues from a dude who let's other dudes rail his wife.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 1:55:25 PM EDT
[#8]
Quote History |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 2:26:43 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I have a hard time taking religious queues from a dude who let's other dudes rail his wife. Wait...wut? |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 3:27:15 PM EDT
[#10]
They were running a sale on holy water, it was half off like alter boys pants.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 3:42:15 PM EDT
[#11]
I keep a Super Soaker filled with Holy Water, in case of Vampires.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 3:44:05 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Religion and holy water are as much farces as UFOs, ghosts, vampires, and leprechauns. People will believe anything if you scare them enough. Fight me! I'll pray for you instead. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 5:32:13 PM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in. I don't need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don't need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 5:37:08 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I never see Catholics mocking Baptists, Lutherans, Episcopalians or Born again Christians...however I can't say the same for the reverse. And somehow this board will give you a warning for mocking an entire religious group with the sole exception of Catholics |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 5:39:55 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in. I don't need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don't need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 5:42:05 PM EDT
[#16]
The thread is posted in GD not the Religion forum. Yes, the rules a not quite the same but common courtesy and the golden rule applies. One learns that in the Religion forum.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 5:46:42 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted: ... this board will give you a warning for mocking an entire religious group with the sole exception of Catholics That is not true. I have personally handed out account warnings to people for attacking Catholics. I know other mods/staff have as well. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:05:59 PM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in. I don’t need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don’t need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. Curious what you make of Acts 19:12, "So that even there were brought from his body to the sick, handkerchiefs and aprons, and the diseases departed from them, and the wicked spirits went out of them." If God wrought miracles by the hand of St. Paul through handkerchiefs, why could He not do the same through blessed water? ETA: I can see why an atheist might scoff at the concept, but I don't see why a Christian would. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:13:11 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: It's completely made up by the church. Nonsense. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:13:19 PM EDT
[#20]
I quenched a knife in it one time just because I had access to some. Not really sure why. Because I didn't have one yet maybe? For hunting skinwalkers? Either way, I have that now.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:13:50 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in. I don’t need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don’t need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. I cant tell you how much you are wrong. Damn man, you need to really look at what you just said. As a very strong Catholic, this is just fucked up. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:23:11 PM EDT
[#22]
No such thing, but everyone is free to believe whatever superstition they want.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:23:56 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted: OP responded to this in a serious way?  Many of our Arfcom brethren are humor impaired. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:29:33 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: In before Catholics aren’t Christian Quote HistoryQuoted: In before Catholics aren’t Christian Quoted: Being Christian it means nothing to me but I can understand the use of it to comfort those who believe in it. Good timing! 
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:33:34 PM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted: This thread is stupid. It's basically just asking if people are Catholic or not. You could do a similar thread on prayer rugs, and surprise, surprise, nobody will find them important outside of Muslims. But it gives noncatholic shitbirds an excuse to pump up their pathetically fragile egos and self esteem by showing how they worship God so much better than those papal mackerel snappers! |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:34:27 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I have never seen a vampire in a Catholic church. Valid point |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:47:48 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted: They were running a sale on holy water, it was half off like alter boys pants. 
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Posted: 2/16/2023 6:48:55 PM EDT
[#28]
My mom had a weird hang up with Catholics. She was raised they would kill the Protestants and demonic forces were just under the surfaces of those various types of robes.....yet, when her sister came to visit or she was picking my dad up from work we ended up going into one of those beautiful cathedrals. We would go just inside until our eyes adjusted to the dark and be able to see the beauty. I noticed this round stone bowl with water in it. I put my hands in it. My mom freaked out like I'd just drank milk from Satan's cow.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:26:46 PM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted: My mom had a weird hang up with Catholics. She was raised they would kill the Protestants and demonic forces were just under the surfaces of those various types of robes.....yet, when her sister came to visit or she was picking my dad up from work we ended up going into one of those beautiful cathedrals. We would go just inside until our eyes adjusted to the dark and be able to see the beauty. I noticed this round stone bowl with water in it. I put my hands in it. My mom freaked out like I'd just drank milk from Satan's cow. ?? The first really ornate Catholic Church I saw was in the Podunk town of New Waverly, TX. It was beautiful. Dad said the German and Polish farmers were very generous with their tithing. We lived in Huntsville at the time and our church was a very basic wood frame structure. More of a chapel. And the priest came from New Waverly to say mass. The only Catholic Churches I had seen before that were on military bases. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:39:31 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Holy water can work. Some of it is belief and the other is god. The Russian Orthodox cut a cross in the rivers and lakes here to bless it and get holy water. Can work for quenching your thirst. Beyond that....no. Just stop to think about how ridiculous what you just said is. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:40:48 PM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Religion and holy water are as much farces as UFOs, ghosts, vampires, and leprechauns. People will believe anything if you scare them enough. Fight me!  Attached File |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:42:02 PM EDT
[#32]
Is there any credible documentation that holy water burns when applied to a possessed person? Or is that just folklore?
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:43:27 PM EDT
[#33]
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:44:17 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Religion and holy water are as much farces as UFOs, ghosts, vampires, and leprechauns. People will believe anything if you scare them enough. Fight me! /media/mediaFiles/sharedAlbum/hes_right_you_know-328.jpg Vampires, mummies and the Holy Ghost, These are the things that terrify me the most. Jimmy Buffett ? |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:49:33 PM EDT
[#35]
I want holy heavy water.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:52:53 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryThat was such a great movie, seems to have been all but forgotten. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:55:11 PM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Just signs of faith. It's like Jews blessing food to make it Kosher or Halal food for Muslims (no pork/lizards). But since it's Christian (especially Catholic), it's acceptable to publicly ridicule. I can't claim to be a particularly politically correct type, but I AM an inquisitive, logical type. I knew two Muslims in college, that had different practices. One would only buy and eat chicken (meat?) that was halal. The other was fine with buying non-halal chicken, then praying over the non-halal chicken, before it was cooked and eaten. The one, who refused to eat non-halal chicken, was fine with using communal pots and pans (shared with roommates), as long as they were properly washed first. The one who would pray over and bless non-halal chicken, absolutely refused to use any pots or pans if they had EVER been previously used for non-halal meat. After hearing about this and pondering it, I asked them why they didn’t just have the first guy wash the chicken, and the 2nd guy pray over the pots and pans?  No, they didn't try to chop my head off. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:59:40 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted: The phlebotomist who draws my blood once said she could tell that my blood was sanctified or something similar. Can’t remember exactly the word she used. I didn’t know what to say. So I just said Praise God. She is always upbeat and friendly so I was not offended by her comment. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: I have never seen a vampire in a Catholic church. I did see a phlebotomist. That was scary too. The phlebotomist who draws my blood once said she could tell that my blood was sanctified or something similar. Can’t remember exactly the word she used. I didn’t know what to say. So I just said Praise God. She is always upbeat and friendly so I was not offended by her comment. Hemolyzed. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 8:59:42 PM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted: The phlebotomist who draws my blood once said she could tell that my blood was sanctified or something similar. Can’t remember exactly the word she used. I didn’t know what to say. So I just said Praise God. She is always upbeat and friendly so I was not offended by her comment. Yeah, that's pretty sane.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 9:03:12 PM EDT
[#40]
Four nuns die in a car crash and end up at the Pearly Gates where they are met by St. Peter. He says, "Before any of you can enter Heaven, I must ask you a question. Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?"
The first nun lowers her eyes and softly replies, "I did touch one with my finger one time." "OK," says St. Peter, "dip your finger in this pail of holy water and you can go inside." He then asks the second nun, "Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?" The second nun solemnly replies, "Yes, St. Peter, I touched one with my hand one time." "Ok, dip your hand in this pail of holy water and you can go inside," says St. Peter. St. Peter then turns to the third nun and asks, "Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?" Before she has a chance to answer, the fourth nun pushes the third nun aside and stands in front of St. Peter. Shocked, St. Peter asks the fourth nun, "What are you doing? Why did you push this other nun aside and cut in front of her?" "I wanted to get my drink before she has to stick her ass in there!!" replied the fourth nun. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 9:06:04 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Unless it was blessed by Jesus Himself, it's just ordinary H2O. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 9:10:59 PM EDT
[#42]
I don’t believe holy water is “holy” or contains any spiritual properties. But I would never mock anyone’s belief in it though.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 9:14:10 PM EDT
[#43]
I hear it makes better lube than regular water.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 9:19:10 PM EDT
[#44]
If you put Holy Water on a Ouija Board it cancels out and nothing will happen if you use it.
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:00:26 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Four nuns die in a car crash and end up at the Pearly Gates where they are met by St. Peter. He says, "Before any of you can enter Heaven, I must ask you a question. Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?" The first nun lowers her eyes and softly replies, "I did touch one with my finger one time." "OK," says St. Peter, "dip your finger in this pail of holy water and you can go inside." He then asks the second nun, "Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?" The second nun solemnly replies, "Yes, St. Peter, I touched one with my hand one time." "Ok, dip your hand in this pail of holy water and you can go inside," says St. Peter. St. Peter then turns to the third nun and asks, "Has any part of your body ever touched a man's penis?" Before she has a chance to answer, the fourth nun pushes the third nun aside and stands in front of St. Peter. Shocked, St. Peter asks the fourth nun, "What are you doing? Why did you push this other nun aside and cut in front of her?" "I wanted to get my drink before she has to stick her ass in there!!" replied the fourth nun. Good one. Never heard that one before. But on the topic of nuns. Are you aware that celibacy and chastity are two separate things? Nuns take a vow of celibacy because they are married to the Church. That is not negotiable. Chastity on the other hand is easily dealt with in the confession booth. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:18:01 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Protestant here. Catholics come across as bead rubbing idolaters. The holy water ranks up there with a miter, incense and a penalty box to confess in. I don’t need that or candles to talk to Jesus. I don’t need the ceremony or the sodomites with their finery. I talk to the boss directly without intercession. What are your opinions on Muslims. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:21:20 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That is not true. I have personally handed out account warnings to people for attacking Catholics. I know other mods/staff have as well. Look up At the several ad hominem attacks on all Catholics. I don't see edits by mods... |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:23:46 PM EDT
[#48]
The Holy Water theology is another of those issies that puzzles me with regard to certain protestant rhetoric.
It's hardly just a "Catholic" thing. The Eastern Orthodox have the same understanding, and they split off in 1054. The Copts have the same concept. And they split off their own way formally in 451, not recognizing the Council of Chalcedon. The Assyrians have the same concept, and they left 20 years before that, at the Council of Ephesus. So, what is it? Did Roman paganism have some sort of powerful hold on the Church even way back when, that not even even Catholics claim, or was it a widely understood "thing" throughout the early Church? |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:27:17 PM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I realized after surfing this site I'm quit ignorant of other peoples beliefs so I just google them. Holy water is partially for baptizing and partly for protection from evil. My denomination just uses uses prayer for that since God says to to it. I can think of at least a couple of noteworthy examples of people who were baptized in water in scripture. |
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Posted: 2/16/2023 10:32:37 PM EDT
[#50]
Holy water cuts the cheap altar wine so the old Monsignor could chug that shit after mass and not blink when throwing away those flat wafers which were supposedly "body of Christ."
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