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Posted: 1/30/2014 9:24:42 PM EDT
My father had hands that felt like leather gloves so yeah I got spanked. My mother on the other hand used reverse psychology on me.......Maybe that's why I'm so screwy?
Honestly I thinking Spanking has a place and will always have a place in a child's upbringing.....Shit I see maybe 20 kids a day who could use a good one. |
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No. I found it more effective to just take away things that he liked. I'm in my 50s and I always hear the stories of "my ol' man used to take me behind the woodpile and leave me with compound fractures and I'm better for it" kind of stuff. My parents used the psychological aspect. They knew what each child liked and they would simply take it away. For my sister, she lost the phone. For me, it was to take away my books...my brother - TV. It was very effective. |
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My kid hasnt "needed" a spanking yet but to me, I see it as a failure of the parents resorting to beating because they were unable to to come up with anything better. You are in fact, smarter than a kid.
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I was spanked with a belt that I got the privilege of choosing as a child.
I personally don't approve and feel there are better (or just as effective) ways of disciplining a child. My sister and BIL use time outs. When done correctly they actually do work. My nephew is 2.5yrs and in the midst of a screaming fit can still manage to stay in his spot until his time is up and always comes out a new man. I have even heard him say " I need a few more minutes" on one occasion... To each his own. There are no hard and fast rules about disciplining or raising children. Each situation warrants its own response. |
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My kid hasnt "needed" a spanking yet but to me, I see it as a failure of the parents resorting to beating because they were unable to to come up with anything better. You are in fact, smarter than a kid. View Quote True that. Teaching a child to resort to violence when logic and reasoning doesn't work will only set them up for failure in the real world where there is a general lack of logic and reason. |
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I deal with the product of in disciplined kids on a daily basis. I will spank my kids as discipline form. No objects, open hand and within reason
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Kids need to be spanked. Sorry but that's the problem with our youth today, parents scared to discipline their kids.
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I haven't spanked yet. Never felt the need. Not against it, just have been able to reason with my daughter.
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Quoted:
Whoever said violence wasn't the right answer, asked the wrong question. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Teaching a child to resort to violence when logic and reasoning doesn't work will only set them up for failure in the real world where there is a general lack of logic and reason. Whoever said violence wasn't the right answer, asked the wrong question. |
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I never spanked my kid, but that was just because she never needed it. If you can achieve the desired results without spankings, there is no need for them. If you can't achieve the desired results, it might be an option that you need to consider. Kids are all different. What works for one may not work for another. I know that when I was growing an ass whoopin was the worst possible punishment and I sure as hell made sure not to do what netted me one of those.
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Quoted:
I never spanked my kid, but that was just because she never needed it. If you can achieve the desired results without spankings, there is no need for them. If you can't achieve the desired results, it might be an option that you need to consider. Kids are all different. What works for one may not work for another. I know that when I was growing an ass whoopin was the worst possible punishment and I sure as hell made sure not to do what netted me one of those. View Quote Agreed. Amazing to watch other peoples parenting skills and see the results. It is really amazing how one can actually reason with a child if the time is taken to explain things so they understand. |
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My daughter says the "I'm disappointed in your behavior" speech works much better.
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Never needed to spank. I suppose we've been lucky. Stern warnings, the occasional timeout, and discussions on actions/behavior and consequences are all we've ever needed to do.
I can't imagine having a child so out of control or otherwise misbehaved that physical violence would be a necessary step. |
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There's a lot more going on than just a lack of spankings there daddeo. Although, I can see the appeal in making things so hyper-simplified that everything has a one issue answer or explanation. Quoted:
Kids need to be spanked. Sorry but that's the problem with our youth today, parents scared to discipline their kids. View Quote |
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I have spanked my girls when they needed it.
Do take things away from them also plus grounding. |
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When I was real young 4-12ish I didn't need a lot of discipline from my dad. I wasn't a real bad kid.
It wasn't until I got to the age of puberty that my dad had to really use any thing on me. Which still wasn't too bad till I took a swing at em when he tried taking something that I paid for. That is the only time my dad has laid a finger on me that has been in anger. What I've done with my nephew has worked I use the reward system when he's good and when he's bad. He doesn't do what I say I reward him with a trip to the corner or back inside. I'll take his toys away until he decides to listen or behave. When he's good I reward him with his toys back or letting him play outside again. I've scared the shit outta him a few times when I've had to raise my voice. He generally knows that uncle doesn't screw around and will legitimately punish him, unlike my ma and my brother. |
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Quoted: Kids need to be spanked. Sorry but that's the problem with our youth today, parents scared to discipline their kids. View Quote White people; spank your kids! p.s. I have one that it doesn't work on. But I have found something that does. Take away his PS4. Ohhhh he screams like a mashed cat. |
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I spank my boys...have done so since they were old enough to do stupid shit. I got spanked as a kid by my father.....my mother left all the discipline up to him...
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Quoted:
When someone does stupid shit, there should be pain involved. Pain is a good teacher! View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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I spank my boys...have done so since they were old enough to do stupid shit. I got spanked as a kid by my father.....my mother left all the discipline up to him... When someone does stupid shit, there should be pain involved. Pain is a good teacher! Most of the time their lessons are learned by doing something stupid on their own non-behavior related like all of us did when we were young...but the discipline is reserved for disrespectful and disregard for parental figures......nothing worse than a kid who gets no direction and is out of control... |
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Spanked, but stopped when my son hit 9....there has to be a limit
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Varies from kid to kid. I have 4 sons. One I could have beaten with a 2 x 4 and it would have made no difference. Another one was absolutely destroyed by sending him to his room. My wife used a wooden spoon on them. A few years ago in a family get together the boys finally told her that it didn't hurt but they would fake the crying and then go to their room and laugh about it, Sometimes they would goad her in to it because they thought it was so funny.
My father would simply say in a low voice that we were "cruisin for a bruisin" and that pretty much stopped everything because we knew that he never said it twice. |
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We didn't have the need with our two older kids, but my 2yo is something special! I can't believe her defiance at times and unfortunately that results with an opened hand, 5% strength, swat on her butt (which is protected with a Pull-up). It kills me to do it, but yelling, timeout, and taking things away just doesn't work. The swat gets her attention and hopefully soon, she will grow out of her "terrible twos".
My stepson needed spankings when we met, he was 4, but that isn't allowed. Fortunately, he came around pretty quick. My older daughter responds well to me raising my voice and giving her a pissed off look/stare. |
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When they were real young they got a swat on the butt, I just raise my voice now and threaten to take the car/I phone away
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the threat of a spank works wonders in my house. She has never needed one but asking if she wants one changes her tune.
Mommy likes a good smack on the ass every now an again so if i need to smack something i just wait for mommy daddy time ETA. I remember my grandfather taking me out to the garage and getting the shit whipped out of me with a belt by him. Taught me some very painful lessons and only took one or two times. Mainly that a man needs to always tell the truth and that there was no worse crime in a family than to lie to one another. I love that man and miss him dearly. |
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I've spanked both of mine.
Not an everyday occurrence, but once in a great while, after multiple warnings they persist in bad behavior and I quickly correct it. Beating them because of a bad test score or not cleaning up their room is not something I would do. |
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I used too. However now I just take things away. I stopped spanking when they were 10. I get to angry to spank. I'm afraid I may actually hurt them.
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Quoted:
I've spanked both of mine. Not an everyday occurrence, but once in a great while, after multiple warnings they persist in bad behavior and I quickly correct it. Beating them because of a bad test score or not cleaning up their room is not something I would do. View Quote I agree. It has to be something really bad. Only time I've had to spank is when they disrespected their mother or a school teacher. |
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I used to spank my kids when they were younger. They are such good kids now that I don't need to anymore so F#CK YOU antispanking libtards! It Does work!
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Quoted: Kids need to be spanked. Sorry but that's the problem with our youth today, parents scared to discipline their kids. View Quote Truth. My Sisinlaw took a holistic hands off approach she read in some shitty book (Spock?) and my niece and nephew are total waists. Crime, heroin, booz, unwanted pregnancy. Me, I feared my father and would rather sleep in the woods than come home in trouble.
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Quoted: Most of the time their lessons are learned by doing something stupid on their own non-behavior related like all of us did when we were young...but the discipline is reserved for disrespectful and disregard for parental figures......nothing worse than a kid who gets no direction and is out of control... View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: I spank my boys...have done so since they were old enough to do stupid shit. I got spanked as a kid by my father.....my mother left all the discipline up to him... When someone does stupid shit, there should be pain involved. Pain is a good teacher! Most of the time their lessons are learned by doing something stupid on their own non-behavior related like all of us did when we were young...but the discipline is reserved for disrespectful and disregard for parental figures......nothing worse than a kid who gets no direction and is out of control... The idea if disciplining a kid is more complex than "Doing this will work" or "Spanking will teach them that violence is the answer." It should be tailored to the kid. Generally, an involved parent will have positive results. Kids aren't dumb and know when they can get away with crap. Like you said, though, most learning will come from natural consequences, not a heavy-handed and overbearing parent.
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Wooden cake spoon(rarely). But if they mouth off or curse, they get vinegar in the mouth. I have found vinegar to be a very effective tool for behavior modification.
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We spank for willfully disobedient behavior, and lying.
If it is behavior related, the kid gets a reminder about whatever instruction, then if it persists, a direct question, are you going to obey or disobey? Disobedience at that point results in an openhanded spank. Parents, if your child's disobedience has gone on long enough that you get irritated or angry, YOU are at fault for not correcting it sooner. |
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Haven't had to spank my 3 girls in god knows how long. I'm not opposed to it by any means and have resorted to it in the past. I have a method of getting my bluff in early so most of the time all it takes is "the look".
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We never had a need to hit our son. If I was seriously PO'd, my wife would take over and I would go somewhere out of earshot and vent.
Now my mother on the other hand, was the designated hitter in our family. If I wasn't getting beat, I was being cussed out. I swore I would never do that to a child of mine, and haven't. |
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Whatever reasonable it takes to get their attention.
Thank God (thank you, Lord, thank you...) it didn't take much moar than "Diaper Dustings" to get my son's attention. I only had to spank him once or twice and that was when he was still a toddler. After that, I started talking to him like an adult. More like, "You're not stupid, so why did you DO something stupid? You're one of the smartest kids I know so why would you do something like that? Kind of like the "Son, I am disappoint..." speech. I did take his PS2 and lock it in my gunsafe for a month a couple of times. His mom did a good one once, she demanded his codes for his PS2 and deleted all his saved games (NOOOOOO!!!) He got in trouble bad once when he was an early teen and started acting "uppity" about it so I took the hinge pins from his bedroom door for a week. He got the point. he got mad another time after his first "real" girlfriend broke up with him and he punched a hole in his bedroom wall...I brought in the drywall tools and mud and handed them to him and made him fix it...I also nitpicked his drywalling and made him redo it 2 or 3 times until I couldn't see where the hole had been. By the time it was over with (about a week) he had worked out all of his perceived "angst" and was over her. Actions have consequences. He's a freshman in college now...He's living at home his first 2 years of college and he knows that if he wants me to keep paying for his books and tuition, keep driving one of my cars, and keep living under my roof, he has to play by the rules and all we treat each other like adults. I told him that he can move out anytime he wants and I'll help him, and no matter what he could ever do I will always love him...but it will be on his own dime. ETA: God gave us a great kid, he's turning into a good man, he's been dating a nice girl for about a year now and we consider her to be one of our own, and I love my son moar than life itself. |
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We never had a need to hit our son. If I was seriously PO'd, my wife would take over and I would go somewhere out of earshot and vent. Now my mother on the other hand, was the designated hitter in our family. If I wasn't getting beat, I was being cussed out. I swore I would never do that to a child of mine, and haven't. View Quote Some handle it differently then others, I've noticed. Some people have fragile minds, or some type of mental thing going on. Others it shapens them up. My dad used to beat me. I turned out decent, especially compared to my friends. However I had a friend. whose dad spanked him. He does good in life, but blames his dad for everything when something goes wrong. Dude does good in life too, but says everything bad that comes his way is due to his dad spanking him. |
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only if its absolutely warranted. so very rarely do i have to
any other time i try to teach them and instruct them why they are being dumbasses. instance - my 1 yr old son was chewing on the business end of my cell phone charger - i tapped him on his head and yelled at him "no cords" he whimpered for a second and then laughed at me... little shit -
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This. I have no issues spanking my kids. Open handed with reasonable force. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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Kids need to be spanked. Sorry but that's the problem with our youth today, parents scared to discipline their kids. This. I have no issues spanking my kids. Open handed with reasonable force. same. its not my first option unless it something needs immediate correction. usually its just enough to get her attention. it works wonders. |
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Yep, an light touch to the mouth when he back talks mom or dad also.
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Quoted: Varies from kid to kid. I have 4 sons. One I could have beaten with a 2 x 4 and it would have made no difference. Another one was absolutely destroyed by sending him to his room. My wife used a wooden spoon on them. A few years ago in a family get together the boys finally told her that it didn't hurt but they would fake the crying and then go to their room and laugh about it, Sometimes they would goad her in to it because they thought it was so funny. My father would simply say in a low voice that we were "cruisin for a bruisin" and that pretty much stopped everything because we knew that he never said it twice. View Quote Anyone that only has girls shouldn't be able to respond to this thread.
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