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OP, tell your friend. Let him decide the course of action beyond that point. It`s his wife. Maybe he's one of those people that gives 2nd/3rd/10th chances and doesn't want the whole town to know about it. For the record, those people are weak morons but it's his wife/life. As far as a wolf being in the flock, the odds are always high for this in a congregation. If I was the husband I'd go scorched earth after some strategic positioning.
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Quoted: What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Are we going to play the cutesy verse out of context game? What about Paul's letter to the church in Corinth that was pretty black and white in telling them to knock it off with the sport fucking if they wanted to be Christians? What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg What does the Bible say you should do with a brother in Christ who is sinning? |
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What should a good man do? I think you're doing it. Don't back down
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Quoted: What part of that is out of context? It's pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg View Quote |
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Quoted: Quoted: I come to GD to watch mouth breathers stumble over one another to prove that they are dumber than everyone else. It’s really quite amazing to watch. Breathtaking, really. It's a tremendous opportunity to update your ignore list. |
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Quoted: He's right though. Using temptation as an excuse is weak sauce faggotry and an excuse for not practicing self control. It's an excuse for a consciously-made choice. View Quote If you believe otherwise, you're not being realistic. |
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Quoted: It really is. For some reason, many church leaders believe being a church leader requires being a giant pussy. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: This. Weak church leadership makes doing hard things harder. If they want to be nice men instead of good men find a new church. That’s profound. It really is. For some reason, many church leaders believe being a church leader requires being a giant pussy. They are practicing the 'Hippy Jesus' theorem. And yet Jesus said " I come here not in peace, but with a sword." |
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For those who can't be bothered to read the thread...
Back on pg 3 OP had already called his friend over to have the talk. That was last night. Advise on "To tell or not to tell" is no longer the question. |
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Quoted: He must be removed from the position and never hold the position again. View Quote Honest question here.... Is there no pathway for repentance, forgiveness, and reconcilation? Is this because he's proven untrustworthy for life, or because he's soiled the profession and the rest of those in the profession don't want to be tarred by his actions? Personally, guy is a fucking dirtbag, and if ran out on a rail never to return, I'd not care. But, I'm also not a pastor that works professionally with forgiveness. |
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Quoted: So I took the kids to a park (remote & quiet) to get some autumn photos when I see our assistant pastor sitting alone in his minivan. I wanted privacy so we avoided contact with preacher man... Then along comes my buddy's wife and she plops down in Bible boy's car after hugs and kisses. I could see nasty stuff going on in the minivan. Had the camera so I took some photos as they said their goodbyes. Just hugs and a kiss. Normally I mind my own business but I think this guy is a total predator. My Friend's wife has been going through major bout of post-partum and she's a total train wreck right now. Clearly mentally fragile. I've asked for a meeting with church leadership. Not sure if I should tell my friend yet. Having mixed feelings about not confronting them in the car... Could use some advice here. View Quote Was the van rocking back and forth? I would need to see the video before offering advice. |
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We are all hypocrites. However, with this knowledge, I have chosen to not be an example figure to anyone because my family. Additionally, I would never do such an act against my family.
If you choose to be such a figure that people will follow, you should be held to a HIGHER standard, whether Christian or not. This type of thing takes hypocrisy to whole new level. Disgusting. |
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Quoted: Pay attention, folks: This is an object lesson in being a man. Rock on, OP. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy but I admire your determination to handle it. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: I think it is important for people to know that predators like this find their way into our churches, schools, inner circle of friends, etc. so they can prey on people when they are vulnerable. Someone has to shine the light on them. This time it's my turn. I just want to do it the right way. Pay attention, folks: This is an object lesson in being a man. Rock on, OP. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy but I admire your determination to handle it. 100% Agree. It's not a problem with religion, as some want to paint it. This can be found with just about anyone. Letting figures of authority take advantage of their position on vulnerable people is the root of a lot of problems in our culture. |
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You did good in this horrible situation.
Your buddy knows you got his back and you are exposing a church predator. praying for you, your buddy, and church. |
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Quoted: What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg View Quote The universal presence of sin isn't a valid excuse to not uphold a standard of behavior. |
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Quoted: It's apparently not very clear to you. Jesus is telling you directly to judge, and when you do so, make sure that you're not guilty of the same sin. Correct your own error first, then, then you can see clearly to correct your brothers error. But you darn better correct your brothers error in the end View Quote I was referring to the "cast the first stone verse with my reply. The mote and beam verse is crystal clear to me. I'm not in here telling anyone that what the two folks in the OP's story did is right. I do think righteous judgement will be passed on those two eventually. |
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Another vote for tell your buddy as soon as possible, and he should be the first to know. Let him have time to process it and figure out what he wants to do.
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Quoted: What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Are we going to play the cutesy verse out of context game? What about Paul's letter to the church in Corinth that was pretty black and white in telling them to knock it off with the sport fucking if they wanted to be Christians? What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg Since we're taking it in context now, if you bothered to read what you posted you'd know that it's better translated as "however you judge someone, plan on getting judged that way". So it's pretty ignorant to say you can't judge a pastor robbing a bank because you looked at some woman's titties that morning. |
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Quoted: As a pastor, I learned a long time ago not to meet alone with needy women. I have too many Pastor friends who've been brought down by women who were going through rough times. I don't care what the woman did toward the pastor, as a pastor you never put yourself in the position to where you can succumb to temptation. The Bible very clearly lays out that a pastor is to be above reproach. It's obvious that this encounter was planned, so this is all on the man who was supposed to be a spiritual leader. He must be removed from the position and never hold the position again. View Quote "Weak men create rough times." The weak pastor is about to create some really tough times for a lot of people. The weak husband, who had a child with this woman, yet finds it easy to leave when she's going through a rough patch, helped create this domino effect as well. (That's as far as I can tell from reading the OP's statements) |
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Quoted: So I took the kids to a park (remote & quiet) to get some autumn photos when I see our assistant pastor sitting alone in his minivan. I wanted privacy so we avoided contact with preacher man... Then along comes my buddy's wife and she plops down in Bible boy's car after hugs and kisses. I could see nasty stuff going on in the minivan. Had the camera so I took some photos as they said their goodbyes. Just hugs and a kiss. Normally I mind my own business but I think this guy is a total predator. My Friend's wife has been going through major bout of post-partum and she's a total train wreck right now. Clearly mentally fragile. I've asked for a meeting with church leadership. Not sure if I should tell my friend yet. Having mixed feelings about not confronting them in the car... Could use some advice here. View Quote If a friend of mine knew my wife was cheating on me I’d want him to tell me. |
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Tell your friend. Tell the church. I have no patience for cheaters. They should get what they deserve.
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Quoted: Since we're taking it in context now, if you bothered to read what you posted you'd know that it's better translated as "however you judge someone, plan on getting judged that way". So it's pretty ignorant to say you can't judge a pastor robbing a bank because you looked at some woman's titties that morning. View Quote So how far do you take that? Can I judge you for lying if I looked at porn last night? Can you judge me for cussing if you hurt your wife's feelings yesterday? Is any one sin greater than another in God's eyes? (Other than blasphemy of the Holy Spirit) |
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Quoted: Too many creeper pastors......forget the mind your own business blokes, they'd do nothing for distressed women on trains too. View Quote This. People in a position of trust should be held to a higher standard. Lots of pastors banging parishioners—usually starts out with “counseling”. TC |
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Quoted: What does the Bible say you should do with a brother in Christ who is sinning? View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Are we going to play the cutesy verse out of context game? What about Paul's letter to the church in Corinth that was pretty black and white in telling them to knock it off with the sport fucking if they wanted to be Christians? What part of that is out of context? It’s pretty clear to me what Jesus was teaching us. None of us are without sin. Is her sin greater than yours? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-121045_King_James_Bi-2149893.jpg What does the Bible say you should do with a brother in Christ who is sinning? Better question, WWAD (What Would Arfcom Do)? |
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Quoted: He's right though. Using temptation as an excuse is weak sauce faggotry and an excuse for not practicing self control. It's an excuse for a consciously-made choice. View Quote But when you are a weak and predator attacks, you may not be strong enough to repel the predator. Women and men can both serve as a predator. Men get weak. Men suffer depression. Men can also have issues. Men are not always universally strong enough to do the right thing even when it is ingrained in them. For that reason I say removing temptation from your life is best. NOT EVERYONE HAS SUFFERED THIS. But it is real for those who have. So respectfully I say temptation is real @desertw0lf I say there there are many real things I have never experienced. There I go but for the grace of God. |
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Shit can go sideways in these type of things.
Hollywood Baptist Church Rome GA. An affair, A murder behind a Frito Lay distribution center. The Bitch Planned it and the boyfriend committed it. BECAREFUL!!!!! |
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You're referring to your own assistant pastor as "bible boy"? I don't believe you.
Christians are to not even give the perception of immorality. Having pics of a pastor and a married parishionor of the opposite sex embracing in a remote location is enough to have a pastor not be a pastor anymore. If it were me, I would deny that it was me in the photo. Kidding. If it were me, I would look up the contact information for all the elders and send them an email with the photos and a little note about the circumstances of the picture. Let them know that if the correct action is not taken, that you will make the entire congregation aware of the incident. I would put money on it that within a few weeks he will not be employed there anymore. It may take them a couple weeks to fully investigate and fire him. |
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Quoted: TBH, this is the first time I've ever thought about that on the micro level. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: "Weak men create rough times." The weak pastor is about to create some really tough times for a lot of people. IMO, it’s all about a “when good men do nothing” type thing. |
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Quoted: Should have confronted them. You absolutely must go to the church leadership. And if they don’t immediately contact the husband, the wife, and the associate pastor, and AP’s wife, email the pictures to the aggrieved spouses. Don’t let this slide. And if the leadership of the church tries to let it slide, call them out, then leave the church. Between now and then document everything. Leave a record online. Make backups. I hate gross hypocrisy in church leadership and the world mocks us when we wink at sin. Don’t wink at this. Handle it biblically. Don’t turn it into a church wide scandal; don’t send pictures to people who aren’t or shouldn’t be involved. But don’t let this go. View Quote I agree 100%. He should not have even posted this here. With his attitude I question if he's actually a member of the church. If he took all the steps eg. tell the elders (they do nothing), tell the parishioners (they do nothing), then you should tell people outside the church. |
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This is no different than non-religious losers. They simply identify differently. People are evil religious or not.
George Carlin - Religion: A bullshit story |
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This is why I left the church awhile back because the church is blind to “evil.” They always want to take the high road and are risk averse like Democrats.
If my buddy told me my wife was getting piped by the pastor, Mr Glock 19 would visit him and the trifling cunt whore wife to send them directly to hell and then I would repent and God would forgive me. Fuck religion and all their fairytales. The fuckers need to pay their due taxes too. |
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Quoted: I agree 100%. He should not have even posted this here. With his attitude I question if he's actually a member of the church. If he took all the steps eg. tell the elders (they do nothing), tell the parishioners (they do nothing), then you should tell people outside the church. View Quote I am so ever surprised. |
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Quoted: Bunch of modern day Pharisees up in here... So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her. John:8:7 View Quote Seems like a strawman argument to me...unless, of course, everyone who is posting in this thread is a pastor, fooling around with a married woman, or both. |
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Quoted: All the way to the Hell of Misbehaving Preachers. I hate these people with their expensive cars, wives and lifestyles that corrupt the churches. No one needs a Hummer or Corvette as a vehicle to drive from their McManshion to their church. View Quote I had gone through CCD most of my childhood, had been confirmed, the whole thing. Turns out she didn't need to do that though. Just start showing up to services. So....we did that. We also did the private meetings with the priest, took tests with multiple choice questions separately so that he could decide if we were a good match, etc. Right before the wedding in one of the last meetings, he mentioned that another option would have been for us to make a one time donation to the church, in lieu of attending the services. I was frankly fucking shocked. So I followed up to make sure that I had understood correctly, that if we had donated enough money to the church, that we would not to have had to come to all the services every week, and he would have married us in the church because of that donation. He confirmed that that was the case. My faith in the church began it's death that day. I can only speak for that particular Catholic church, but it was sale. |
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Quoted: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-123752_King_James_Bi-2149907.jpg View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: What does the Bible say you should do with a brother in Christ who is sinning? https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/436951/Screenshot_20211031-123752_King_James_Bi-2149907.jpg Attached File Attached File Attached File |
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Quoted: https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/168726/D3BAD7CE-A936-4D6A-8012-473363709A39_jpe-2149985.JPG https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/168726/FE2B665D-8231-452D-9964-E9D49259DFC8_jpe-2149992.JPG https://www.ar15.com/media/mediaFiles/168726/42D41E05-EF3A-47C4-B2BE-91593B7B402D_jpe-2149993.JPG View Quote We'll now. That excludes a lot of people. Probably some in this very thread ready to cast that first stone. Thank you very much for proving my point. Modern day Pharisees indeed. |
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Quoted: We'll now. That excludes a lot of people. Probably some in this very thread ready to cast that first stone. Thank you very much for proving my point. Modern day Pharisees indeed. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: We'll now. That excludes a lot of people. Probably some in this very thread ready to cast that first stone. Thank you very much for proving my point. Modern day Pharisees indeed. Who? Paul? Or Jesus? I can forgive a man all day but a pastor has ZERO business being a pastor and living in such a way. Absolutely zero. Paul makes it clear here and Timothy if I need to pull those verses out. The “first stone” section you mention is an interpolation. Maybe it was part of the Bible originally, maybe not. Either way there’s no question about the other verses above. |
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Quoted: This is why I left the church awhile back because the church is blind to “evil.” They always want to take the high road and are risk averse like Democrats. If my buddy told me my wife was getting piped by the pastor, Mr Glock 19 would visit him and the trifling cunt whore wife to send them directly to hell and then I would repent and God would forgive me. Fuck religion and all their fairytales. The fuckers need to pay their due taxes too. View Quote That second paragraph says the church from the first paragraph must have been teaching you nothing I’m blaming them not you in case it sounds otherwise |
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The pastor has grievously abused his position of trusted authority, and the church leadership needs to know. I would not take it to the pastor first directly, in this case, as a bunch of excuses, crying, self-flagellation, do not answer an important question: Who else?
Your buddy deserves to know first. |
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Quoted: Honest question here.... Is there no pathway for repentance, forgiveness, and reconcilation? Is this because he's proven untrustworthy for life, or because he's soiled the profession and the rest of those in the profession don't want to be tarred by his actions? Personally, guy is a fucking dirtbag, and if ran out on a rail never to return, I'd not care. But, I'm also not a pastor that works professionally with forgiveness. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: He must be removed from the position and never hold the position again. Honest question here.... Is there no pathway for repentance, forgiveness, and reconcilation? Is this because he's proven untrustworthy for life, or because he's soiled the profession and the rest of those in the profession don't want to be tarred by his actions? Personally, guy is a fucking dirtbag, and if ran out on a rail never to return, I'd not care. But, I'm also not a pastor that works professionally with forgiveness. My understanding is, Repentance - yes, it's all on the person Forgiveness - yes, it's all on God Reconciliation - maybe, it's between all those involved |
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Quoted: Blackmail…just think of it as a Sin Tax. $300 a month for one year or a one time payment of $2500. View Quote LoL, that’s why I love this place. OP, thats a tough one, but maybe God put you there as a witness. Gotta tell the friend. People hate the bearer of bad news but let the chips fall where they may. Depending on how good a friend, perhaps tell him quietly. |
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Quoted: When I first got married, my wife to be was not Catholic but I was. We went to the priest of the local church and inquired about a Catholic wedding, but I expected it to be a "no" unless she went through whatever steps were needed to properly convert. To my surprise, the priest said that if we attended Sunday Mass between that date and the date of the planned wedding, that he would marry us in the church. I had gone through CCD most of my childhood, had been confirmed, the whole thing. Turns out she didn't need to do that though. Just start showing up to services. So....we did that. We also did the private meetings with the priest, took tests with multiple choice questions separately so that he could decide if we were a good match, etc. Right before the wedding in one of the last meetings, he mentioned that another option would have been for us to make a one time donation to the church, in lieu of attending the services. I was frankly fucking shocked. So I followed up to make sure that I had understood correctly, that if we had donated enough money to the church, that we would not to have had to come to all the services every week, and he would have married us in the church because of that donation. He confirmed that that was the case. My faith in the church began it's death that day. I can only speak for that particular Catholic church, but it was sale. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: All the way to the Hell of Misbehaving Preachers. I hate these people with their expensive cars, wives and lifestyles that corrupt the churches. No one needs a Hummer or Corvette as a vehicle to drive from their McManshion to their church. I had gone through CCD most of my childhood, had been confirmed, the whole thing. Turns out she didn't need to do that though. Just start showing up to services. So....we did that. We also did the private meetings with the priest, took tests with multiple choice questions separately so that he could decide if we were a good match, etc. Right before the wedding in one of the last meetings, he mentioned that another option would have been for us to make a one time donation to the church, in lieu of attending the services. I was frankly fucking shocked. So I followed up to make sure that I had understood correctly, that if we had donated enough money to the church, that we would not to have had to come to all the services every week, and he would have married us in the church because of that donation. He confirmed that that was the case. My faith in the church began it's death that day. I can only speak for that particular Catholic church, but it was sale. Martin Luther is spinning in his grave. |
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