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I will tell on myself.  Got a new laptop at work.  Could not get the camera working on teams calls.  Checked all the settings with no success.  Walked it down to the it guys who hate to be bothered.

Hey I can't seem to get the camera working on my new laptop.  He says let me see it".  I hand it over and he slides a tiny tab over that moves a cover from the lens.   I go.....duh.

Quoted:  in IT.

Customer said her PC doesn't come on.  

I ask if her PC is plugged in the power. She said yes. Checked twice.  

I send tech out there.  PC wasn't plugged in the wall outlet.  Tech plug it in, it works.

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I was working in a multi million dollar home of 2 lawyers. The power went out. Power was out for about an hour when I heard them discussing the fact that they were trapped and needed to call a cab to get to work. They did not know how to open their garage doors without the electric door opener. I shit you not. After showing them how to open the doors they were very embarrassed.

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A long time ago, our company got new Jeep pickups. The "handyman" guy we had went and drove the first one back to our shop. Everyone was crowded around it, admiring it. I walk up and point out that they installed the hub caps incorrectly,  the Jeep name in the middle was upside down on some, crooked on others..... handyman gets all worked up and races back to the dealership for them to fix...

About 2 hours later I got my ass chewed out by the owner of our company... ??

Quoted:


I've got one better.  Asked if PC was plugged in and customer told me to hold on because she needed to get a flashlight to check because the power was out.

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In a previous life I was the assistant GM for a Roto-Rooter franchise here in Vegas.  The crazy stull people would try to flush down the toilet or grind up in the garbage disposal absolutely astounded me.  The only thing more crazy was when we'd show up they'd have floors covered in shit but would still want to haggle to try to get $10 - $20 off the bill.

Quoted:
Told this one a few times here.

I worked at Barrett. Was head of Assembly & Testfire shop. Took quite a few customer calls and helped out doing that also.
Customer with an 82a1 that we had shipped out less than a month prior calls back and says his rifle won't hit 8x10 paper at 100 yds . Barely 2 out of 10 shots will hit paper. I issue a call tag. Tell customer to remove his scope as we use one of 3 Leupold Mk4's we have on hand for paper punching.
Get the rifle in about a week. Take it out on the range and sure enough, it won't hit paper at 100 yds
Bring the rifle back into the shop, disassemble the upper and bore scope the barrel. Someone had reamed out the 1st 5 or 6 inches of rifling in front of the chamber.
Called the customer and asked how that happened.  He said his gunsmith told him reaming out the first few inches of a .50 gives you an increase in velocity. The military does it to all their .50 rifles.

Tell him the barrel is ruined and is an expensive tent stake. New barrel will be $1200. He said he would get back to me.

His "gunsmith" calls a day or 2 later saying the customer wants him to pay for a new barrel as the 'Smith ruined the barrel. He is telling us to just cut back the barrel and rechamber it. I tell him that's a no go as the barrel would be cut back over 6" and there is not enough out side diameter to cut a chamber. The customer paid for a 29" barrel. Not a 23". Gunsmith goes absolutely ape shit yelling and screaming.

Customer calls back a few hours later and says to hold onto the rifle until it gets sorted out. About a month later the gunsmith calls and wants to pay for a new barrel. I forward him to the girl up front that takes payments. Customer calls back and wants to know when it would be possible to get the rifle back. I tell him it will go out the next day via 2nd Day Delivery.
I took a bit of heat by the front office over the 2nd Day Delivery. About a week or so later 5 of the rifle owners friends call and want to order rifles. Seems the rifle owner was some hot shot heart surgeon and all his surgeon buddies wanted guns now.

The girl up front that gave me a hard time over the 2nd Day Delivery came back with the order and apologized over the hard time she gave me.
Ronnie called me to his office the following day and gave me a little talking to over the Delivery option also. But also said thanks for almost a $100k order from the 5 buddies of the doctor.

I usually stayed in a bit of trouble over helping customers.

Quoted:  not going to do it

appreciate all my customers even the difficult ones

the only bad ones are the ones that don't pay and you have to go do collections on

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My wife related this story to me. She worked the night shift at a convivence store in the Panaca the 2nd oldest town in Nevada established in 1864. State highway 319 passes through Panaca and the store is adjacent to the highway on the west end of town. Some out of towners coming from Utah stop to buy snacks, use the bathroom and complain about how stupid people are for putting a town in the middle of a highway. The town was established long before the state put in any highway.

Quoted:
Been reading your fb posts.

My biggest WTF was a guy buying a soda for 68 cents, and paying with a credit card.  Price of the soda should say it all......

Quoted:
Tons from when I worked at the local italian beef place. Sooooo many shitheads tried to pull the "this is unacceptable, I'm gonna have to call corporate" bullshit trying to get free food. Well, go ahead and call. You will get me. I'm corporate. And also the shift supervisor. Told quite a few folks straight up "you're not getting free stuff".

Best part? Had the Owner's blessing. He would have told them exactly the same.

Quoted:
Well, being a LEO our customers are often stupid.  But my favorites are the two MENSA applicants who broke into the front window of a ski shop and triggered the alarm.  The ski shop directly across the street from our station.  Our dispatcher just rolled her chair over to the window and gave us descriptions and locations.  Hook them up, take them literally across the street and into the cells.  What the hell were you thinking?  Didn't you see the POLICE STATION!  I mean we have a spotlight on our sign, and a flag flying and police cars parked outside!
Oh, we saw the flag and thought it was the post office.

Quoted:
Kinda fits in.  Installed conduit / wire on a big residential remodel.  I rec'd some money along the way and then the customer calls to say, "We cannot pay you to finish.  We just added up how much we have spent so far and we are broke.  A friend from work said he would finish the electric for free"

Hmmm.  "Okay, sorry to hear that.  I need 2K to make me whole"

"We don't owe you that"

"Yes, you do.  Your electrician has a week to attach his name to the project and then I will remove mine".  Of course the guy didn't but I did so the city slapped a STOP WORK order on the front door.  I filed my mechanic's lien, and waited.  Short time after I receive a letter from a lawyer saying my work was incorrect and I had damaged his customer's standing with the city  My response, "I was hired to supply labor and materials and I have not been paid in full"

A year later the male homeowner calls, friendly as can be, said he went to refi and my lien popped up and he needed it removed.

"No problem, send me a check for 2K and I'll remove it"

"We don't owe you that, I'm putting my wife on the phone"  Her first words, "I'M CALLING MY LAWYER AND TELLING HIM YOU ARE BADGERING US"  Um, you called me nutjob

She offered 100 dollars, I laughed, and countered with 1K, she agreed.  Title company calls, need a lien waiver, I drive over, hand over my waiver, ask for my check, girl says they have to clear title first before I get a check, I snatched my waiver back and walked out.  Title company calls again, I drive over, ask for a check, girl says they have to clear title first, so I said, "Don't call me again unless you have a check because I will not come back again" and walked out

Title company calls, I drive over, exchange check for waiver, drive straight to bank to deposit.  Few hours later title company calls saying I didn't sign the waiver.

"Oh, I didn't?  My bad.  I cannot make it over today, maybe tomorrow."  Tomorrow turned into two weeks.  Female customer calls screaming about how she had to take out a bridge loan, I'm costing her money.

"Well, now you know how it feels to be f'd over"

Quoted:
Well, being a LEO our customers are often stupid.  But my favorites are the two MENSA applicants who broke into the front window of a ski shop and triggered the alarm.  The ski shop directly across the street from our station.  Our dispatcher just rolled her chair over to the window and gave us descriptions and locations.  Hook them up, take them literally across the street and into the cells.  What the hell were you thinking?  Didn't you see the POLICE STATION!  I mean we have a spotlight on our sign, and a flag flying and police cars parked outside!
Oh, we saw the flag and thought it was the post office.

Quoted:
I was a sysadmin in IT. I saw out a guys HP workstation with a more powerful one. He tells me he had data on the local disk and wants it moved over.

It was chock full of porn he had been downloading at work. Management didn’t care, so I moved the data. Nothing good in it worth keeping.

Quoted:
Ever work in an ER?  How about can't get the vibrator out his ass and is still vibrating.