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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:47:46 AM EDT
[#1]
If there is no sex, outside of medical reasons or simply mutually not wanting it (1 in 4 dislike sex), then I say the marriage is in need of repair, but not necessarily over.
There is always hope, amigo. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:50:05 AM EDT
[#2]
It's over
Unless the couple is really old or a medical condition. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:50:25 AM EDT
[#3]
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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:53:23 AM EDT
[#4]
If both involved parties are ok with the situation then the marriage is fine.
My observation has been that this is very often not the case though. Based on that I'd say that from what I've witnessed most likely a sexless marriage is headed towards being over, a/multiple affairs, or some other 'agreement' between the two that are married that at least somewhat provides each of them what they need. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:55:47 AM EDT
[#5]
If she ain’t fuckn you she is fuckn someone else. Most of the time. Unless you’re older than 50 or medical issues like you said.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 8:56:32 AM EDT
[#6]
Depending on the situation.
If it's a medical issue, that's one thing. Understandable. If both are no longer interested, no problem. But if one spouse want it, and the other doesn't, well, there's a problem. Thank God that's a problem we never had. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:00:42 AM EDT
[#7]
Get in a good fight over somthing
If you dont have makeup sex within a week or so you got some problems |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:01:24 AM EDT
[#8]
At 30 one or both are getting it elsewhere at 50 who gives a shit.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:03:32 AM EDT
[#9]
Yep. It’s over. Unless old/medical
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:05:09 AM EDT
[#10]
Depends on a lot of things. But if there are no medical reasons and she withholds sex then it’s over.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:05:48 AM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted: At 30 one or both are getting it elsewhere at 50 who gives a shit. My wife and I are in our 50's. She is menopausal and a PITA. Very little sex. But I'm an ugly and grumpy old man with few good options so what can I do? |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:06:21 AM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's over Unless the couple is really old or a medical condition. Some marriages start out as low-sex. Some relationships are for better or worse more cerebral or emotional than physical. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:06:58 AM EDT
[#13]
Lack of sex in a marriage or long-term relationship is as already stated, "in need of repair." Being 50 and older does not have to mean lessened desire for sex. Take care of yourself physically, mentally and spiritually and the desire and ability to perform will be there for most.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:07:24 AM EDT
[#14]
It's very linear:
No sex - - > Resentment - - > The relationship is over. Ask me how I know. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:09:09 AM EDT
[#15]
I was in a sexless marriage. After about 13 years of no sex, I ejected. It wasn't just the lack of sex though. Initially there was a lot of affection then that wained. I'm currently In a relationship with an amazing Brazilian and we are making up for my lost time. I talked to my ex bro-in-laws and their wives are pretty much the same. It has to be either something biological or learned behavior from their mom.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:11:33 AM EDT
[#16]
Quoted: Just a discussion with some friends about relationships, in what they are and how they work. Someone said that if there is no sex, the relationship or marriage is over. Someone else said there are other ways to be intimate and care and remain in the relationship, even if there is no sex. Barring medical issues, which is correct? If a marriage or relationship has no sex is it over? As with everything in life, there's no simple yes or no here. There are too many if/ands/buts involved between two people to determine the answer to your question. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:23:50 AM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's very linear: No sex - - > Resentment - - > The relationship is over. Ask me how I know. This guy gets it… ask me how I know. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:24:50 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted: At 30 one or both are getting it elsewhere at 50 who gives a shit. My husband will be 50 in 2 months and I certainly give a shit.  |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:25:46 AM EDT
[#19]
It is as far as I’m concerned
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:27:01 AM EDT
[#20]
In general, outside old age or lack of desire on BOTH parties, yeah it's in serious trouble.
In general. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:27:37 AM EDT
[#21]
I'm not married and it's not my place to judge someone else's relationship. I personally have no desire to be married to a woman that won't let me have her.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:33:58 AM EDT
[#22]
There has to be a reasonable explanation that is articulated and accepted between spouses. Otherwise its a ticking time bomb of resentment.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:34:01 AM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted: My wife and I are in our 50's. She is menopausal and a PITA. Very little sex. But I'm an ugly and grumpy old man with few good options so what can I do? Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: At 30 one or both are getting it elsewhere at 50 who gives a shit. My wife and I are in our 50's. She is menopausal and a PITA. Very little sex. But I'm an ugly and grumpy old man with few good options so what can I do? wait till she's done with menopause, then get her on HRT. You'd better get on it as well, because it can super-charge her libido. This is what happened with us, YMMV |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:36:26 AM EDT
[#24]
Yes
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:37:53 AM EDT
[#25]
Sex was a big deal, after about 55, we could care less. Relationships change after 30 years. Sex is way less important. At 25? Problem
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:39:54 AM EDT
[#26]
Quoted: Just a discussion with some friends about relationships, in what they are and how they work. Someone said that if there is no sex, the relationship or marriage is over. Someone else said there are other ways to be intimate and care and remain in the relationship, even if there is no sex. Barring medical issues, which is correct? If a marriage or relationship has no sex is it over? It depends. If your wife cuts off your dick, it is definitely over. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:42:10 AM EDT
[#27]
Should've put it in the vows. Not that it would matter to most people these days.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:44:39 AM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryWho knew he'd be living the dream 40 years later? |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:44:53 AM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I was in a sexless marriage. After about 13 years of no sex, I ejected. It wasn't just the lack of sex though. Initially there was a lot of affection then that wained. I'm currently In a relationship with an amazing Brazilian and we are making up for my lost time. I talked to my ex bro-in-laws and their wives are pretty much the same. It has to be either something biological or learned behavior from their mom. No offense, but how can you be with someone that long w/o having sex???? Anywho, like others said, depends on what's going on... Me? I'm currently in such a situation - where if we can't get the sex situation fixed, I'm out...cuz I already have a male "buddy" (non-romantic situation) and don't need another. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:47:53 AM EDT
[#30]
Is this a one-sided thing, or are both parties just not interested in it anymore?
Quoted: I was in a sexless marriage. After about 13 years of no sex, I ejected. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:48:17 AM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Lack of sex in a marriage or long-term relationship is as already stated, "in need of repair." Being 50 and older does not have to mean lessened desire for sex. Take care of yourself physically, mentally and spiritually and the desire and ability to perform will be there for most. Jeez, funny the whippersnappers think a sex life is over at 50. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 9:52:23 AM EDT
[#32]
It would be a deal breaker for me.
If it was medical, then of course it would be understandable, through sickness and health. If it was simply a choice....that's no bueno. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:00:32 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted: This guy gets it… ask me how I know. I took the class. Eye opening. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:01:46 AM EDT
[#34]
Quoted: Just a discussion with some friends about relationships, in what they are and how they work. Someone said that if there is no sex, the relationship or marriage is over. Someone else said there are other ways to be intimate and care and remain in the relationship, even if there is no sex. Barring medical issues, which is correct? If a marriage or relationship has no sex is it over? It certainly doesn't help I have always said that regular sex keeps couples from drifting apart |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:01:56 AM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted: There has to be a reasonable explanation that is articulated and accepted between spouses. Otherwise its a ticking time bomb of resentment. Rejection is a horrible feeling. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:02:10 AM EDT
[#36]
Even if they have a medical issue, if they aren't at least giving you a BJ or something every once in a while, they don't give a shit about your needs.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:02:41 AM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted: wait till she's done with menopause, then get her on HRT. You'd better get on it as well, because it can super-charge her libido. This is what happened with us, YMMV I think I need some of that HRT stuff. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:02:48 AM EDT
[#38]
Mine was. Looking at her now I’m glad.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:04:44 AM EDT
[#39]
I stayed in a sexless marriage for far far too long to be with and protect my kids. They are grown now and six plus years after the process started, they now see right thru the crazy.
She was on the dick carousel and got an STD as a reward. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:06:54 AM EDT
[#40]
Not at all. It is a factor of both parties expectations. But if both parties in the marriage are "ok" with it, and the rest of the marriage is strong, then sex is irrelevant. Sex is important due to hormone levels in one or both parties. But hormones change in one or both parties. Either understand that and work with it, or be ignorant of that and be confused and hurt.
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:13:52 AM EDT
[#41]
If my wife shut it off? Yes, it's over. If she isn't putting out she is more of a room mate than a spouse and I don't want a room mate.
Some of my friends married gals who were providing it regularly until they ate the wedding cake then it dried up. They are either divorced or miserable. My wife and I took vows "to have and to hold". We uphold our vows. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:18:08 AM EDT
[#42]
Can’t have sex?
Or Won’t have sex? There’s a difference. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:18:17 AM EDT
[#43]
Quoted: Just a discussion with some friends about relationships, in what they are and how they work. Someone said that if there is no sex, the relationship or marriage is over. Someone else said there are other ways to be intimate and care and remain in the relationship, even if there is no sex. Barring medical issues, which is correct? If a marriage or relationship has no sex is it over? IMO yes. But depending on age/physical abilities things may change as people get older. If it's a case of one partner has opted out of sex. Yes it's over. Move on. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:18:18 AM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted: If my wife shut it off? Yes, it's over. If she isn't putting out she is more of a room mate than a spouse and I don't want a room mate. Some of my friends married gals who were providing it regularly until they ate the wedding cake then it dried up. They are either divorced or miserable. My wife and I took vows "to have and to hold". We uphold our vows. My thoughts as well. You are friends with kids shared between you. Some people may be ok with that, I am not. Once the sex spigot (wearing nice undies, flirting, foreplay, grab ass, sex, etc) is off it almost invariably leads to the man checking out of the relationship and the marriage failing soon after. The amount of this I saw in my 30s was amazing, basically the same road map over and over again. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:18:39 AM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's over Unless the couple is really old or a medical condition. I'd say that sex is a very important component of a relationship. It's an intimacy that should exist.... though it will more than likely become less frequent as a couple ages, it shouldn't just suddenly stop at earlier ages unless there is some sort of medical condition. I believe it is possible to love someone and stay married to them without physical intimacy... but that is a crippled relationship. Luckily at 46, my 40 year old GF loves sex, and loves it with me... |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 10:43:41 AM EDT
[#46]
I remember on the TV show Home Improvement, Tim & Jill were discussing their sex lives.
Jill: "You know I need to feel close to you in order to want to have sex." Tim: "You know I need to have sex with you in order to feel close." Therein lies the dilemma. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 11:49:11 AM EDT
[#47]
Quoted: Just a discussion with some friends about relationships, in what they are and how they work. Someone said that if there is no sex, the relationship or marriage is over. Someone else said there are other ways to be intimate and care and remain in the relationship, even if there is no sex. Barring medical issues, which is correct? If a marriage or relationship has no sex is it over? If your getting advice here. Its over, your wife is either doing your brother, best friend, neighbor, Big Black guy at her work or visiting the Casting Couch. My wife and I had a pretty active sex life from the time we started dating till about a year and a half ago. She was probably the best, wildest and most active that I'd been with. Not that I have been with 100s of women like most of the studs here. About 2 years ago, she started putting on weight, having health issues and started menopause. That drastically slowed things down. Her female parts did not work like they used too. Eventually, I just stopped trying as it seemed painful to her. Now as I hit 50, (I know most of the 50+ guys here still do and want to do it 3 times a day, 4 out of 7 days a week) my drive has really I guess decreased. I just don't really care about it. I'd rather be shooting guns, off roading, playing ham radios, watching tv or napping.... Never thought I'd see myself like this, but this is my reality. As long as I don't sense her being unhappy, I guess I'm good with it. I hope to be with her the rest of our lives. I really enjoy her company, our time together, our jokes, our hobbies and projects. Life in general with her. I feel like she feels the same way. I did not have this in past relationships or my last marriage. |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 11:54:12 AM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted: If she ain’t fuckn you she is fuckn someone else. Most of the time. Unless you’re older than 50 or medical issues like you said. This. I know plenty of married women around here that are not fucking their husbands, but are definitely fucking someone…… |
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Posted: 5/3/2023 11:56:26 AM EDT
[#49]
lol
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Posted: 5/3/2023 12:00:45 PM EDT
[#50]
No sex is time to eject, it is emotional destruction and against the reasons of marriage.
IE: We contractually (with God or the state your choice) agreed to have sex with only each other, no sex, institutes the Force Majeure clause |
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