User Panel
User Panel
User Panel
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:30:17 PM EST
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I’m not missing shit. If your wife selfishly chooses to be fat, she’s not honoring you. You can type out 2 pages of non-sense. Doesn’t change the fact the staying with someone who chooses to be unhealthy is honorable. Being a poor example for your kids isn’t honorable. You do you, I’ll live my life my way. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:30:49 PM EST
[#2]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
GF popped out 2 kids, and hovers around 115 to 120 at 5'5" ish. Perhaps people should put down the fork. GF's are in 'attain male' mode. 'Prize won' mode = blimping in America. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:31:56 PM EST
[#3]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
 Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:I was waiting for someone to catch it. Sarcasm or humble brag?  
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:32:41 PM EST
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
"GF" GF's are in 'attain male' mode. 'Prize won' mode = blimping in America. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
GF popped out 2 kids, and hovers around 115 to 120 at 5'5" ish. Perhaps people should put down the fork. GF's are in 'attain male' mode. 'Prize won' mode = blimping in America. Both children are in their mid to late teens. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:34:13 PM EST
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My wife is getting real close to weighing more than me. It's hard to breech the subject. It's also hard to look at her when her belly hangs below her shirt most days. She has some medical issues that she blames most of it on but refuses to see a doctor. It sucks because it's bringing both of us down. I don't want to be hamstrung because she isn't able to do everything I can. Once it gets to the near-ultimatum part, it's over. "look, honey, we've always been a team, and I say that we team up to both get into the best shape we can possibly be in" might be an approach (use better words). |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:34:22 PM EST
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We shouldn't judge women on being fat. They can't help it and are just naturally fat. God made them to be fat. Some lucky women do have a good man around to help them understand this and keep most of the fat off until they are too old to have sex. Which is around 40. Usually. We have sex now about as much as when we got married. I'm 48 and she is 47 and been married 19 yrs. Sex takes 15-30 out of your day. If your wife can't take 15-30 mins out of her day every 2-3 days to have sex, that's fucking sad. I just call it how it is and my wife understands this. I find time for anything my wife wants or needs me to to do. My reward is a blowjob or sex every 2-3 days. If more couples figured this out they would have a better sex life and marriage. This goes for the guys as well, stay in shape or get some viagra. No wife wants a limp dick. You best be pounding that shit like you did when you met her 
No excused unless there are some major medical issues. If she gets sore get some lube, if she had trouble having a orgasm get her a vibrator and slam that hard viagra powered pecker in her as she orgasms. And be a man and whisper in her ear...hey babe you are getting fucked hard tonite. Or just say..babe I am gonna inappropriately touch the hell out of your ass tonite, you better be ready |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:36:36 PM EST
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We shouldn't judge women on being fat. They can't help it and are just naturally fat. God made them to be fat. Some lucky women do have a good man around to help them understand this and keep most of the fat off until they are too old to have sex. Which is around 40. Usually. Nor are the ever too old to have sex. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:39:16 PM EST
[#8]
I thought I posted before but can't find it. Oh well.
It's rare for a person to let themselves go in such a way, long-term, without there being other issues going on too. Address those other issues and maybe the problem with the weight gain will be resolved (or at least helped). To ignore the spouse's wishes for so long and pack in the pounds, long term—there's something else going on there. Find out what it is. When a person (wife or husband) makes an ultimatum before there is even a problem, like, "If you gan XX pounds I will leave you" or "If you don't earn this amount I will leave you" (or less specific—but still as strongly worded—ultimatums) then it says something about them and it's not good. What man here would marry a woman who had ultimatums about his appearance or earning ability, as if she knew up front that her love for him was very much conditional? Most of you guys would be screaming, "Eject!" and rightly so. Well, same here. If what's the most important thing is her weight (hotness level), she should immediately eject. People's looks change over time. She's never going to be able to guarantee she'll stay hot. She should eject now and get it over with. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:43:08 PM EST
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted:
You're still the same Adonis as the day you were married? |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:46:22 PM EST
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My wife is getting real close to weighing more than me. It's hard to breech the subject. It's also hard to look at her when her belly hangs below her shirt most days. She has some medical issues that she blames most of it on but refuses to see a doctor. It sucks because it's bringing both of us down. I don't want to be hamstrung because she isn't able to do everything I can. I had to do one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I had to have a come to Jesus talk with her. I explained that I couldn’t be with her if she was going to be dead by 45 like her parents. We went through an incredibly difficult time. I would have to ride her ass about making better choices. I’d cry knowing that I was hurting her, but resolved that it was for the best. I was clear, upfront and never wavered. I want to spend as much of my life with my wife as possible. We proved to ourselves how much we truely love each other. Our relationship has never been stronger. Can’t say it’s for everyone, but it was worked for us. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:47:23 PM EST
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted: trumps "I can do any fucking thing I want because I have a pulse". |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:51:51 PM EST
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
5'1" 125lbs when I married her. 175lbs after having twins. 265lbs when I left 3 years later. Sometimes you have to draw the line... |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:54:57 PM EST
[#13]
OP is already an oath breaker, and therefore unfaithful to his wife.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:56:09 PM EST
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
People tend to get sedimentary in life, fix that if that's what happened to you. ( maybe its a you problem not a her problem) |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:57:37 PM EST
[#15]
When she fails the wall test.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 4:58:27 PM EST
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My wife can be as selfish and fat as she wants, but I didn't vow to stay with her unless she was selfish and fat. In fact, I kind of vowed the opposite (for better or worse, in sickness and in health, etc. etc.). I'm not going to make a selfish decision simply because I perceive my wife to be selfish (or at least that's where I'm aiming; I may very well fail should push come to shove). Again, that's not honor; that is simply reciprocity, which is morally unremarkable. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted: I’m not missing shit. If your wife selfishly chooses to be fat, she’s not honoring you. You can type out 2 pages of non-sense. Doesn’t change the fact the staying with someone who chooses to be unhealthy is honorable. Being a poor example for your kids isn’t honorable. You do you, I’ll live my life my way. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. I don’t lack honor or integrity. Nor love for my wife. Nor self respect for myself. You can toss that out all you want, you don’t know a fucking thing about me. IDAF. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:00:05 PM EST
[#17]
Losing significant body fat takes a lot of time and hard work. It isn't how long it takes to solve the problem that matters. It is how long after identifying the problem that it persists without putting in some of that hard work to correct it that matters. Of course that also means putting on the big boy pants and talking about it and supporting her along the way.
Some of you religious folk sure are smug and judgmental. Isn't that supposed to be one of your sins or something? Judge not lest ye be judged? Besides, not everyone says a bunch of nonsense before getting married so that they can have sex with the approval of a church or a cloud ghost. Most of us aren't locked into religious pacts that we made when we were stupid in our 20s. The juice is either worth the squeeze or it isn't. Life is too short to waste with someone you don't want to be with over a silly contract. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:02:56 PM EST
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We mistake common for normal. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:03:25 PM EST
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My wife can be as selfish and fat as she wants, but I didn't vow to stay with her unless she was selfish and fat. In fact, I kind of vowed the opposite (for better or worse, in sickness and in health, etc. etc.). I'm not going to make a selfish decision simply because I perceive my wife to be selfish (or at least that's where I'm aiming; I may very well fail should push come to shove). Again, that's not honor; that is simply reciprocity, which is morally unremarkable. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted: I’m not missing shit. If your wife selfishly chooses to be fat, she’s not honoring you. You can type out 2 pages of non-sense. Doesn’t change the fact the staying with someone who chooses to be unhealthy is honorable. Being a poor example for your kids isn’t honorable. You do you, I’ll live my life my way. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. Not to mention, it's clear the dude doesnt understand. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. So, congrats on that one. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:05:39 PM EST
[#20]
I agree with you about identifying the problem and helping her every step of the way... but...
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Life is too short to waste with someone you don't want to be with over a silly contract. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:05:49 PM EST
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
When she fails the wall test. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:06:55 PM EST
[#22]
Quoted: And you've got to, but you can't really put it into terms where it's because of you. Once it gets to the near-ultimatum part, it's over. "look, honey, we've always been a team, and I say that we team up to both get into the best shape we can possibly be in" might be an approach (use better words). Quoted: Back when my wife started down the "I'm married now" track. I had to do one of the hardest things I've ever done. I had to have a come to Jesus talk with her. I explained that I couldn't be with her if she was going to be dead by 45 like her parents. We went through an incredibly difficult time. I would have to ride her ass about making better choices. I'd cry knowing that I was hurting her, but resolved that it was for the best. I was clear, upfront and never wavered. I want to spend as much of my life with my wife as possible. We proved to ourselves how much we truely love each other. Our relationship has never been stronger. Can't say it's for everyone, but it was worked for us. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:08:55 PM EST
[#23]
She ain't a lady if she ain't 180.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:14:42 PM EST
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
There's a difference between a medical issue and just getting fat because one is lazy. Not to mention, it's clear the dude doesnt understand. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. So, congrats on that one. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted: I'm not missing shit. If your wife selfishly chooses to be fat, she's not honoring you. You can type out 2 pages of non-sense. Doesn't change the fact the staying with someone who chooses to be unhealthy is honorable. Being a poor example for your kids isn't honorable. You do you, I'll live my life my way. In any case, you can live your life however you want to. No one's really talking about that. I'm addressing honor. You can choose to seek it or not. I couldn't care less. Not to mention, it's clear the dude doesnt understand. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. So, congrats on that one. 
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:15:25 PM EST
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted: There's a difference between a medical issue and just getting fat because one is lazy. Not to mention, it's clear the dude doesnt understand. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. So, congrats on that one. That he’s bible thumping and being judgemental? I grew up in the church, I know it when I see it. I simply don’t care. My posts are based on what I’ve actually done and how I feel. Not based off a book. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:19:35 PM EST
[#26]
Nothing brings out the feels in a discussion like a good fat woman.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:22:34 PM EST
[#27]
Hey shallow Hal...your're the first person I've ignored. What a dick post.
Congrats. I can see your "I got crippled at work and my wife and my wife has to wipe my ass" post. Vows, integrity are not for all...and you are proving it. Good luck. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:27:53 PM EST
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Hey shallow Hal...your're the first person I've ignored. What a dick post. Congrats. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:27:56 PM EST
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I agree with you about identifying the problem and helping her every step of the way... but... Don't enter into a contract that you believe is "silly." If the other person doesn't think it's "silly" but you do, you are not a match. Eject before entering into any "silly" contracts. A partnership is either mutually beneficial or it isn't. When it isn't it is time to dissolve the partnership. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:29:58 PM EST
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Seriously? It’s humor. Just poking fun at a shallow subject. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Hey shallow Hal...your're the first person I've ignored. What a dick post. Congrats. 
Depending on how big she gets, she may start calling YOU shallow Hal
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:30:43 PM EST
[#31]
My wife has had 5 kids and is about 130 pounds.
She does good |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:30:52 PM EST
[#32]
Is this thread a fucking train wreck. Because I bet it's a fucking train wreck
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:32:13 PM EST
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm not married, but if it ever happens you'd better believe that will be included. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:32:27 PM EST
[#34]
This thread is an amazing mix of great advice and horrible advice. Well done all!
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:33:54 PM EST
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
After having each kid, I put my wife on a body plan. It was a nutrition/workout regimen tailored for the weight gained each pregnancy. Each time, she was allowed to transition to maintenance when she achieved the required BMI, to which she adheres today. Just be a man and take charge of your house.
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:34:06 PM EST
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This thread is an amazing mix of great advice and horrible advice. Well done all! 
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:36:15 PM EST
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Life contracts are silly. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:37:13 PM EST
[#38]
When I met my ex wife she was in reasonably in good shape. As we continued dating, moved in together, engaged and married, she kept gaining weight. I did too but not that much. It didn't bother me a whole lot but she was always making excuses. The simple fact is, she was just lazy about it. The same way she was lazy about keeping the house picked up. I don't have a problem doing house work, but when it's left up to me only, it gets a little frustrating.
What I hate is the excuses. If you're tired of being over weight then do something about it. Don't bitch about it and continue to sit on the couch. But this isn't why or even a factor in why we got divorced. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:38:49 PM EST
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I don’t understand what? That he’s bible thumping and being judgemental? I grew up in the church, I know it when I see it. I simply don’t care. My posts are based on what I’ve actually done and how I feel. Not based off a book. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted: There's a difference between a medical issue and just getting fat because one is lazy. Not to mention, it's clear the dude doesnt understand. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. So, congrats on that one. That he’s bible thumping and being judgemental? I grew up in the church, I know it when I see it. I simply don’t care. My posts are based on what I’ve actually done and how I feel. Not based off a book. Mocking his effort to continually try and preach. I've never actually seem someone white knight their own virtue. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:39:21 PM EST
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted: It's fucking GD! What else would it be |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:40:05 PM EST
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Seriously? It’s humor. Just poking fun at a shallow subject. Good luck in your marriage in any case OP. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:42:44 PM EST
[#42]
Hypothetical for me, am not married.
Depending on how it distributes, she may very well be okay in my book. If It went to her boobies, she can keep it.
Srs. Wouldn't be in a hurry to get on her case about it. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:47:00 PM EST
[#43]
My vows did not include until you put on to much weight and neither did hers.
She my be selfish for not loosing 20 lb of baby fat but I’m not so selfish to dump her for it. Seriously OP you need to rethink if your vows, word or honor mean anything. WTF |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:48:50 PM EST
[#44]
You don’t give them an ultimatum. You give them 6 months. You don’t go the surgery route. Without self discipline it will ultimately fail.
A husband has the right to demand the wife clean up. They have an obligation to each other to maintain good health. It is a shitty thing to let yourself go. For better or worse, sickness and in health does not apply to fat. Fat is a choice. Fat is not sickness. It is a choice unless it is the result of some organic issue. Overactive salivary glands do not count. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:48:56 PM EST
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Nah, that's bullshit. The spirit of the question in the OP has absolutely nothing to do with addressing your wife's weight for health reasons. And in any case, words still mean things. Honor consists in an internal state; it has nothing whatsoever to do with any external circumstance. Honor is not conditional. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Lol at the "tell death" blah blah posts giving there spouses a free pass to be a selfish person. Have any of you thought about how their weight will effect you, your children, your retirement? Teaching your kids that it's ok to be fat because "married, kids". How about when your wife drops dead of heart disease at 45/50/55? Still proud you didn't stand up for her? How about when your retirement is blown on health problems because, fat? It's more than being shallow. My wife's parents were both dead by the time I met her. At 22. From, being unhealthy, fat, etc. I'm not going to watch my wife kill herself by being lazy/fat. With my help and encouragement, she's back to her Pre-marriage weight and runs all the time.  And in any case, words still mean things. Honor consists in an internal state; it has nothing whatsoever to do with any external circumstance. Honor is not conditional. 
|
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:49:32 PM EST
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My vows did not include until you put on to much weight and neither did hers. She my be selfish for not loosing 20 lb of baby fat but I'm not so selfish to dump her for it. Seriously OP you need to rethink if your vows, word or honor mean anything. WTF |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:49:51 PM EST
[#47]
I think people would be best served to ignore the fact that the government is involved in the marriage agreement. They will have a much happier marriage.
In other words, they should assume their wife/husband can and will leave their ass if they choose to be a dipshit. A ballooning housewife is functionally the same as a man who chooses to start smoking after marriage, knowing full well that his wife will have a problem with it. If you have someone committed to supporting you through times of poor health, you have an obligation to be as healthy as you can feasibly be. Also, no one bats an eye at a woman leaving a man if the husband loses his job and cant/refuses to get another. Most women dont want to support a man, its not typical of how our species evolved. That same evolution process drives men towards younger fertile women. By comitting to one woman, who cannot stay young, he is knowingly making a compromise for her. The least she can do is remain as attractive to him as she can. He has the same obligation to her as well. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:50:51 PM EST
[#48]
Mrs. Meyer is 44, she decided to get in shape a few years back...
and has been doing a spectacular job of it. its all about having self respect, goals and a vision I think. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:54:57 PM EST
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Hey shallow Hal...your're the first person I've ignored. What a dick post. Congrats. I can see your "I got crippled at work and my wife and my wife has to wipe my ass" post. Vows, integrity are not for all...and you are proving it. Good luck. |
|
|
|
Posted: 1/29/2018 5:55:13 PM EST
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Good luck in your marriage in any case OP. |
|
|
Win a FREE Membership!
Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!
You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.
AR15.COM is the world's largest firearm community and is a gathering place for firearm enthusiasts of all types.
From hunters and military members, to competition shooters and general firearm enthusiasts, we welcome anyone who values and respects the way of the firearm.
Subscribe to our monthly Newsletter to receive firearm news, product discounts from your favorite Industry Partners, and more.
Copyright © 1996-2024 AR15.COM LLC. All Rights Reserved.
Any use of this content without express written consent is prohibited.
AR15.Com reserves the right to overwrite or replace any affiliate, commercial, or monetizable links, posted by users, with our own.
