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Quoted: Hospital where I worked had a security breach - chick walked in with a clipboard and wandered around for half an hour before someone walked her nosy ass out. See if you can find stairwell access from a parking garage or lower level. There’s usually multiple avenues of access. View Quote We had a homeless woman living in the hospital. She was only caught when a staff nurse found her eating her lunch. She had been sleeping on a couch in the common area and telling people her husband was admitted there. She would hit up the staff break rooms for food. She had been there for weeks. |
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Quoted: Sons a firefighter Emt so he has access. So what’s my angle ? Construction worker roll in with my pack out system and a clip board ? Construction worker with Tourette’s Yeah ah hi I’m looking for the douche bag asshole asshole asshole cunt mechanical room on the 2nd floor bitch fuck you fuck you. I have a mask if need be . View Quote How bout trying...Nut up and walk in. |
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You'll need a brilliant doctor who can put you into a coma that will make you pass for dead at triage.
Find an old medevac bird in the junk yard, paint it up real nice, have your pilot drop you and your team on the helipad Brief your team on the correct things to say "We applied cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient" Then waltz right in to wherever you need to go, be sure to call out any questionable medical practice you see along the way. It will help build credibility and dramatic tension. |
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OP.
Tell the front desk that you are from OSHA and you are there for a pop up inspection. You will get to meet all of the management and executive staff. Probably also get a tour. Then tell them you want to inspect the mother baby unit. At the end of your visit, give them a list of compliance discrepancies. Some good ones are. 1. Outdates on floor stock 2. Staff unable to articulate hazards of alcohol prep pads. (It's an organic solvent) 3. Cidex not labeled correctly. 4. Staff unable to locate MSDS for xx chemical. Unlabeled cleaning solution under sink. This should get you access, and all staff will avoid you like the plague. If anyone stops you, start grilling them about fire evacuation routes, shelter in place, or what the R.A.C.E. acronym means. |
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Quoted: Exactly, when it did it become a thing that everybody thinks they need to be there for that. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Does any new parent actually want family there for the birth? I am genuinely curious. My wife and I didn't want any family at the hospital for the birth of any of our children. It is hectic enough as is at the hospital. Plus, we were released within 2 days every time so it isn't like the grandparents can't see the baby soon after the birth. It had been a thing for a long time until just recently. Family and close friends would come to the hospital and wait in the waiting room during the birth, and a proud father would bring the baby out for everyone to see. They'd all say how pretty and healthy the baby is, tell him to give the mother their best wishes, then go home. Anyone but staff, the father, and maybe the mother's mother in the room for the delivery is kind of weird. |
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Dress up like a rabbi, tell them your the mohel performing the bris
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Dress up like a rabbi, tell them your the mohel performing the bris
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While there are lots of areas of a hospital that you could easily gain access to, the Maternity Ward is not one of them.
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Quoted: Sons a firefighter Emt so he has access. So what’s my angle ? Construction worker roll in with my pack out system and a clip board ? Construction worker with Tourette’s Yeah ah hi I’m looking for the douche bag asshole asshole asshole cunt mechanical room on the 2nd floor bitch fuck you fuck you. I have a mask if need be . View Quote My mother was on her death bed this time last year and the hospital was only letting one person a day in. I was turned away at one entrance, so I went out to my truck and got my hard hat, reflective vest, tape measure, face diaper and a notebook. I went to the next entrance and the people at the desk started with the blablabla and I said "Yeah, it's me again I forgot to measure something, I don't need directions this time". I just walked to the first elevator I could find and hopped on. I had NO IDEA where I was going, so I wandered for about a half hour. The I saw a sign that said "restricted area" and figured I might as well go in there too. Didn't see anything of interest, but I found another elevator. When I got on, there was a hospital employee on there and he asked what floor and I told him the room number I wanted to go to and confessed to being really lost. The guy asked what I was working on and I said "I want to see my mother before she dies and I didn't drive all the way to Dallas to be turned away". He was extremely cool and walked me all the way to her room. He even BS'd my way past a nursing station. I believe it will work for you too. Good luck. |
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Quoted: Hope you get caught. View Quote I appreciate your support. Sure seems everyone else has a light hearted opinion support or some interesting and humorous scenarios. You know like assembling a team and salvage helicopter. Maybe you didn’t catch on all though the baby part is 100% true. It was obviously a fun thread for people to have a laugh. I mean Tourette’s give me a fucking break. Lmao. Lighten up Francis. I do like the OSHA angle though |
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Holly shit I just read through this thread I started. Some of you get it and some well fuck I don’t think there’s any hope. Y’all need to watch those how not to be like your parents commercials. Lmao. Gd provides much entertainment again.
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Oh one more thing. Can you legally carry in a hospital ? Asking for a friend I mean other relatives
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Quoted: Holly shit I just read through this thread I started. Some of you get it and some well fuck I don’t think there’s any hope. Y’all need to watch those how not to be like your parents commercials. Lmao. Gd provides much entertainment again. View Quote Because you do not understand that gd is serious business. Basements cannot exist in a vacuum of autistic screeching. |
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![]() Quoted: Since when, last time I was in the hospital I cut that stupid bracelet off when I got home ![]() View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted: Quoted: Nope, all items with patient information is securely disposed of, not in any trash that's open to the public. ![]() That’s you at home. We have to put everything in shredder bins. Anything with patient identifiers can’t go in the regular trash. Some drugs go in blue bins, some drugs in black bins, the cans can’t be more than 25 feet from each other. You would not believe the regulations. |
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Quoted: OP. Tell the front desk that you are from OSHA and you are there for a pop up inspection. You will get to meet all of the management and executive staff. Probably also get a tour. Then tell them you want to inspect the mother baby unit. At the end of your visit, give them a list of compliance discrepancies. Some good ones are. 1. Outdates on floor stock 2. Staff unable to articulate hazards of alcohol prep pads. (It's an organic solvent) 3. Cidex not labeled correctly. 4. Staff unable to locate MSDS for xx chemical. Unlabeled cleaning solution under sink. This should get you access, and all staff will avoid you like the plague. If anyone stops you, start grilling them about fire evacuation routes, shelter in place, or what the R.A.C.E. acronym means. View Quote They don’t go anywhere without 6-7 administrative folks trailing them. Lol |
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Quoted: Honestly7 years ago the hospital I work at,if you acted like you knew were you were going. You could go just about any where. That's changed alot. Lots and lots of cameras,Badge only access even to enter building other than main lobby. Main entrance is walk through security and then main lobby. You're not getting through in your Centas shirt and tool box. All certified contractors have to badge in. View Quote I can’t imagine what lead to the security changes... |
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My wife and I didn't want anyone visiting at the hospital for our first and don't want anyone for the second either. We will be home in a few days, anyone can come see them then. My wife was tired, hurting and just not in the mood for visitors. So I held my ground. Even with her mom who retired from the hospital and tried sneaking in.
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Button down, tie, slacks. Get a metal clipboard. Wear a mask.
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Tell them your son is actually your gay lover and you have waited a lifetime for this moment. Instant protected class and instant access.
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We just picked up a foster baby from the NICU last week. The university hospital here was very strict with their check-ins checkouts covid BS. First time I've really been in a hospital since all this stuff kicked off 2 years ago. But when we got up to the desk that was handing out passes we just told her oh we're here to pick up a foster baby in the NICU. She looked at us and said oh well then you don't need a pass, just go on through.
That was it no checking our last names no checking the baby's name social worker birth mom none of that stuff and we had complete access to all parts of the hospital that are normally accessible |
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Quoted: You don't sound like the type that fits but....... Set of scrubs ID on a lynyard around your neck blank side facing out. Grab a dynamap and walk right in. If questioned you'd need to know a bit of terminology and possibly a agency or dept name. Another problem is most mom & baby floors are electronically gated and you'd need a access card. A code or both. The three hospitals here now all have entrance security with not only a cop but someone covid screening too before you even make it past the 2nd set of doors. Another way might be claiming you have a test or appointment on another floor to get past the door screeners. That still leaves the locked security doors at mom & baby. They are locked on both sides here so not like your sister can slip you in once you make to the door. Had my son at the hospital i worked at and they were non to happy that i could come and go as i pleased due to being a office float. IE : I had the swipe card and access codes due to being a float for all the units. They were so displeased with it they asked me to stop coming and going as i pleased the next day and they knew me by name. That was back in 2010. You're going to need some real fine point scocial engineering skillz to just walk around a hospital like you own the place nowdays . How about just asking permission for a visit so you are not tossed out or worse? View Quote I would estimate that it would be easier to find an unlocked drug cart, than to get close to the birthing floor. |
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Orange safety vest and clipboard. safety glasses and mask. Maybe "safety first" decal on clipboard. No one will stop you, no one will say a word. Nobody wants to deal with the safety guy.
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This substitute teacher looked young at my high school and got stopped by hall monitors in every school she taught it. She said she started carrying a coffee mug around and nobody bothered her.
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Quoted: Oh one more thing. Can you legally carry in a hospital ? Asking for a friend I mean other relatives View Quote I think so, but I’m not a lawyer or a Florida man. The section about, “any detention facility,” also includes secured mental health areas in hospitals, so do your own research. Worst case is a 2nd degree misdemeanor for knowingly and willfully violating the statute. “I’m sorry officer. I didn’t know I couldn’t do that. I’ll leave now.” That said, carrying while committing other crimes like trespassing is usually a bad idea. http://www.leg.state.fl.us/statutes/index.cfm?App_mode=Display_Statute&Search_String=&URL=0700-0799/0790/Sections/0790.06.html (12)(a) A license issued under this section does not authorize any person to openly carry a handgun or carry a concealed weapon or firearm into: 1. Any place of nuisance as defined in s. 823.05; 2. Any police, sheriff, or highway patrol station; 3. Any detention facility, prison, or jail; 4. Any courthouse; 5. Any courtroom, except that nothing in this section would preclude a judge from carrying a concealed weapon or determining who will carry a concealed weapon in his or her courtroom; 6. Any polling place; 7. Any meeting of the governing body of a county, public school district, municipality, or special district; 8. Any meeting of the Legislature or a committee thereof; 9. Any school, college, or professional athletic event not related to firearms; 10. Any elementary or secondary school facility or administration building; 11. Any career center; 12. Any portion of an establishment licensed to dispense alcoholic beverages for consumption on the premises, which portion of the establishment is primarily devoted to such purpose; 13. Any college or university facility unless the licensee is a registered student, employee, or faculty member of such college or university and the weapon is a stun gun or nonlethal electric weapon or device designed solely for defensive purposes and the weapon does not fire a dart or projectile; 14. The inside of the passenger terminal and sterile area of any airport, provided that no person shall be prohibited from carrying any legal firearm into the terminal, which firearm is encased for shipment for purposes of checking such firearm as baggage to be lawfully transported on any aircraft; or 15. Any place where the carrying of firearms is prohibited by federal law. (b) A person licensed under this section shall not be prohibited from carrying or storing a firearm in a vehicle for lawful purposes. (c) This section does not modify the terms or conditions of s. 790.251(7). (d) Any person who knowingly and willfully violates any provision of this subsection commits a misdemeanor of the second degree, punishable as provided in s. 775.082 or s. 775.083. |
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Hospital scrubs and carrying one of these in each hand. The guards will open the door for you.
https://www.amazon.com/Fred-M-T-Emergency-Transport-Insulated/dp/B007M2OHEY |
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Don’t know if anyone posted as I didn’t read the previous pages, but I saw a crime documentary where a guy made it in to a federal bank posing as a Chinese food delivery guy.
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Quoted: Sons a firefighter Emt so he has access. So what’s my angle ? Construction worker roll in with my pack out system and a clip board ? Construction worker with Tourette’s Yeah ah hi I’m looking for the douche bag asshole asshole asshole cunt mechanical room on the 2nd floor bitch fuck you fuck you. I have a mask if need be . View Quote Just tell them you’re coming in for a heart scan. They’ll take your temp and direct you to the cardiac area. Walk by the cardiac area, find the elevator or stairs then move on and see if it works. If you need to ditch someone tell them you need to take a leak and that you have it from here. You’ll probably still get the boot if there’s a Karen on staff at maternity but it’ll be fun in the meantime. |
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Find an unsecured entrance...there will be plenty of them. Walk in and walk around like you own the place. Ask a housekeeper for directions to the cafeteria. Go there, and get a soda and a snack. Now start walking around like you are lost and ask anyone wearing a hospital ID for directions "back to the L&D floor". When you get there it will be locked...just hit the buzzer and tell them you are trying to get back to room #xxx....that you just left to get to the cafe for a snack. Door opens. Target achieved.
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Quoted: Security is pretty tight around the newborn/nursery areas of hospitals. Crazy people try to steal babies. I had to go there for meetings for about a year and I noticed how many cameras, badge-access doors and security guards there were. View Quote All access to the birthing center is locked. You will not casually stroll on to the birthing floor. Every door will have a camera, and you will be seen. Have fun, and good luck. |
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Quoted: Holly shit I just read through this thread I started. Some of you get it and some well fuck I don’t think there’s any hope. Y’all need to watch those how not to be like your parents commercials. Lmao. Gd provides much entertainment again. View Quote Everyone who tries to walk back a dumb post has this same “hey guys I was just joking! You’re the idiots, not me!”excuse. You wanted to do something, you got told “no”. You didn’t like being told no, so a thread tantrum was born. At least own it. |
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Quoted: Do not attempt that. You do not want to be the reason for a hospital lockdown. Maternity wards and nursery areas are usually special areas of focus for access control due to kidnapping. You will be challenged. They aren’t going to play games with you. There won’t be a funny haha moment if they catch you past the entrance somewhere in the hospital. Security will be called, and you’ll be trespassed off the property. View Quote Judges make examples of folks who fuck with hospital security. It is a deterrent. |
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Set several ambulances on fire in the parking lot. As all of the staff rushes to see whats going on, sneak in. ?????
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Having a child is most often not a medical emergency. Have the child at home and have the parents decide who attends.
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Quoted: Quoted: Oh one more thing. Can you legally carry in a hospital ? Asking for a friend I mean other relatives Concealed is concealed. Not when you squat and cough for the jail deputies. They find everything. ![]() Kharn |
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Scrubs, white coat and a badge. Stethoscope around your neck helps.
But don’t do it. OB takes unapproved entrance or exit very seriously. Seriously. It’s how people get arrested, or shot. |
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“I once convinced a girl I was Kevin Costner, and it worked because I believed it.” - Saul Goodman
If you act like you belong somewhere, sometimes you’d be surprised where you can get.I once got into an NCAA football game without a ticket just by holding my driver’s license out and waived myself right past security. |
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