Chapstick Bro taught me the most important lesson about Chapstick - Page 2

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Chapstick Bro taught me the most important lesson about Chapstick (Page 2 of 3)

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:25:10 PM EST

[#1]

Page two will be gayer than the first.

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:25:18 PM EST

[#2]

He just happened to have a tub of Vaseline behind the counter eh?

I believe you OP.

Not sure why this is such a surprise to you if you were such an avid Chapstick user. Don't you read the ingredients on the labels of things you eat or put on your body?

Chapstick is less messy than Vaseline, so I'll stick to using the same original stuff I've used for decades

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:25:44 PM EST

[#3]

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:26:43 PM EST

[#4]

Quote History

Quoted:
https://images.encyclopediadramatica.rs/4/4a/Population_of_pol.jpg

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"Just here to Troll" & "Directionless Adult"...Fucking beautiful, comedic gold!

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:31:49 PM EST

[#5]

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:41:48 PM EST

[#6]

Query: Are you sure it was his finger, and are you sure it was your lips? I think you may be misremembering what happened to hide a horrible trauma.

You should probably contact some help line or the police perhaps.

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:46:14 PM EST

[#7]

Quote History

Quoted:
Not what I expected when I joined an assault weapons forum.

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You don't think Elmer would have approved?

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:56:27 PM EST

[#8]

Silliest damn thing I've read in a month. Made me giggle and so hard I interrupted my wife's IPad time.

Posted: 9/7/2017 10:59:11 PM EST

[#9]

Point to the place on the doll where the bad man touched you dear...

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:07:47 PM EST

[#10]

Quoted:
Earlier this year, I stopped by my local CVS because my lips were hella busted. Cracked, bleeding, and they just looked and felt like shit.

So, I went up to the register and got a Strawberry Lightning Chapstick, because it tastes good and I feel that works best it is for being time.

Well, the guy at the register made fun of me when I was checking out - not because I was picking up tampons for my neighbor's wife, but because I was buying Chapstick. He told that I was wasting my money on something that was nothing more than petroleum jelly. So, I looked at the label and he was definitely right.

"It's all good, bro, it took me years to figure it out," he explained, pulling a tub of Vaseline from underneath the counter, "I got you."

He dabbed his finger in the Vaseline and slid it over my lips.

Thanks, Chapstick Bro.

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Didn't you tell us about being disappointed with your first blow job? If I remember correctly.....

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:08:08 PM EST

[#11]

You said it tasted awful!

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:09:20 PM EST

[#12]

Well that's a new place for ground up roofies.

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:11:32 PM EST

[#13]

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:12:56 PM EST

[#14]

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:13:41 PM EST

[#15]

Earlier this year

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Coming out thread ?

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:14:52 PM EST

[#16]

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:16:06 PM EST

[#17]

Quote History

Quoted:
Burt's Bees FTW

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Fuck the White Wookie (Roxanne Quimby) and everything she has ever touched.

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:18:00 PM EST

[#18]

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:18:28 PM EST

[#19]

Posted: 9/7/2017 11:32:19 PM EST

[#20]

Posted: 9/8/2017 12:55:14 AM EST

[#21]

Quote History

Quoted:
Not what I expected when I joined an assault weapons forum.

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This is tame. We used to have doll shows.

Posted: 9/8/2017 1:08:15 AM EST

[#22]

I demand to know if balls touched, thus for to determine gayness!

Posted: 9/8/2017 1:11:03 AM EST

[#23]

Quote History

Quoted:
Burt's Bees FTW

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This.

Posted: 9/8/2017 6:43:54 AM EST

[#24]

lol, ok that's a good one to start the day with.

Posted: 9/8/2017 6:49:05 AM EST

[#25]

Quote History

Quoted:
Thread is fucking gayer than some CVS Bro rubbing his Vaseline jizzed fingers on some random dude's mouth.

OP should've stuck with the NIB Cherry flavored biz.

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@TKLOL, got any more pics of the females in your avatar? Posting them here would certainly make this thread less gay.

Posted: 9/8/2017 6:52:24 AM EST

[#26]

Quote History

Quoted:
Rudy is actually a pretty nice guy, added him on FB shortly after GK came out and he answered some of my questions.

https://j.gifs.com/kRkzVX.gif

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
Ok, I chuckled at Chapstick Bro...did he do it in his best Fruity Rudy voice??

Rudy is actually a pretty nice guy, added him on FB shortly after GK came out and he answered some of my questions.

https://j.gifs.com/kRkzVX.gif

LMAO I thought the same thing when I read that!!!!!!!!!!

Posted: 9/8/2017 6:56:01 AM EST

[#27]

Quote History

Quoted:
http://i.imgur.com/CPoGLcu.gif

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Hahaha - this is what I pictured too when I read it !

Posted: 9/8/2017 7:00:41 AM EST

[#28]

Quote History

Quoted:
Not what I expected when I joined an assault weapons forum.

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Triggered

Posted: 9/8/2017 7:01:24 AM EST

[#29]

Quote History

Quoted:
Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way? My mother for instance is one of those people. She is a truck driver that has bad knees and a bad back from driving the truck but you probably do not care about that case either. Oh well I am not one of those people I am 6'4" 245lbs and I exercise every day. I would love to see you say something like to my mother in front of me. Probably never happen though you are probably just an internet tough guy. I doubt very seriously you would say that to someones face. Just my thought.What do you think. Oh I am sorry you probably do not have a brain. I on the other hand will be happy to buy you a plane ticket to come here and see if you have the nerve to say that to someone I know.

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I bet you've been waiting a long...long...long time to use that.

Posted: 9/8/2017 7:44:18 AM EST

[#30]

I prefer the Duke Cannon stuff, but you and your new boyfriend have fun with your Vaseline.

Posted: 9/8/2017 8:03:12 AM EST

[#31]

Quote History

Quoted:
"hella"?

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Literally the gayest part of the whole post.

Posted: 9/8/2017 8:04:57 AM EST

[#32]

So I was driving with one of my chi psi bro, and I accidentally grabbed his leg instead of the gearstick.

We both laughed and I unzipped his pants. We parked the car and I started to fondle his balls. He started laughing because he knows it's all just a joke.

I started sucking his dick in the empty parking lot, and I almost choke because I'm laughing so ****ing hard. My friend is also laughing his ass off too, because this is the greatest prank ever.

He starts making train noises while yelling, "BROJOB! BROJOB! CHOO CHOO!". When he cums, I swallow it like I'm some big faggot. I kissed him and call him a big faggot while laughing.

Best prank ever!

Posted: 9/8/2017 8:52:30 AM EST

[#33]

Well, now we know why your lips were busted up so bad.

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:09:32 AM EST

[#34]

Lol, this is a safe environment, no one is judging you....

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:11:43 AM EST

[#35]

Quote History

Quoted:
This is tame. We used to have doll shows.

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No shit!

Forgot about Sarge.

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:12:03 AM EST

[#36]

Attached File

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:15:56 AM EST

[#37]

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:16:58 AM EST

[#38]

10/10 genuine lol

first time in a long time here.

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:20:37 AM EST

[#39]

Quote History

Quoted:
Not what I expected when I joined an assault weapons forum.

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Don't hang out with marines that often I take it?

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:21:00 AM EST

[#40]

Oh, Diesel, how I missed you.

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:24:31 AM EST

[#41]

Quote History

Quoted:
Are you aware that there are people in this world that have a severe medical condition which causes them to be that way? My mother for instance is one of those people. She is a truck driver that has bad knees and a bad back from driving the truck but you probably do not care about that case either. Oh well I am not one of those people I am 6'4" 245lbs and I exercise every day. I would love to see you say something like to my mother in front of me. Probably never happen though you are probably just an internet tough guy. I doubt very seriously you would say that to someones face. Just my thought.What do you think. Oh I am sorry you probably do not have a brain. I on the other hand will be happy to buy you a plane ticket to come here and see if you have the nerve to say that to someone I know.

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How many plane tickets have you bought so far?

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:24:34 AM EST

[#42]

There are some real weirdo's here on ARFCOM.....

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:26:24 AM EST

[#43]

Quote History

Quoted:

How many plane tickets have you bought so far?

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The first rule of trucker mom fight club...

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:28:14 AM EST

[#44]

Quote History

Quoted:
https://i.imgur.com/52fpHAR.png

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LOL!!!!!!!!

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:32:40 AM EST

[#45]

GD... Where some folks, such as OP, step to from out of the closet.

A.W.D.

Posted: 9/8/2017 9:36:36 AM EST

[#46]

Quote History

Quoted:

I bet you've been waiting a long...long...long time to use that.

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I can front lever, I can straddle press to handstand, and I can hold a reasonable planche for a few seconds, I can hold an iron cross, etc.

You picked on the wrong person to assert "gymnastics superiority" on, cupcake. I'm not your typical lifter. I do yoga, gymnastics, calisthenics, heavy lifting, etc. I do it all.

I've been training gymnastics for a couple years now. That's part of being a well rounded athlete in my mind.